Good video, i have often thought about this with certain relationships i was going to take on with men. It came to mind that if they they have not had good relationships with there mothers how can they trust you. I have a guy friend in my life at the moment who does not have a good relationship with his mother, i know it is a issue but he does not talk about it and i don'y push it for him to talk about it yet, he is a really nice guy but i know there are issues.
I have been thinking about moving to Atlanta in a couple of years. I wanted to ask you what are some nice areas to buy or rent condos from?!? I heard Lawrenceville, McDonough and Stockbridge were all nice areas and only 30 minutes outside of Atlanta. Where are the 34 + crew staying?!? Lol Thanks so much! I need to go in person to check it out. Venus.perry@gmail.com
My mother was my first hater and when I developed enough courage to confront her she denied and justified her physical and verbal abuse. I have had to forgive her and just move on. I am also thankful for the other women God has placed in my life to love me and show me how to treat others. Nice video.
I also lost my mom when I was 19 and I had two close friends (well that I thought was close) who didn'rt show up to my mom's funeral. We just ended our friendships of 15++ years 2wk ago. It hurted a lot cause I know I was a good friend but life goes on. Thanks for making this vid Sis
Quality, not quantity. You can have 1000 Facebook Friends, but what's the point if they're not REAL friends? I have very few true friends, but they're there for me. I don't need to collect friends just for the sake of it. I'd rather be a loner than have fakes by my side.
im prob the only one going to write this. i came from that 'mom' but made me the opp. im always the bff. i dont take friendships or love lightly. my mom made it unsafe to need so i always gave friends time to prove loyalty but learnd that i was mirrorg what i wanted in that time. by the time i needed them it was too late
i kno im not the norm but often tried to find the common denom for selfish friends. it wasnt mom in my cases, some were only childrn. i think its a personality flaw not environ
@RhashasRandomRanting ... Wow. That's terrible and I'm sure it hurt a great deal. Your story is an example of how a person can carry secret resentment and you have no clue. It happens more often than we realize. I've had a friend to reveal secret jealousy towards me after years of what I thought was a close sisterhood. I didn't have a clue either til the moment she exploded on me for no reason....Just know that you didn't MISS the signs, she HID them with smiles and hugs.
i wish i couldve celebrated mothers day with my mother, but we have a fucked to the up relationship. she gave us up years ago, i was the only one in the foster care system. about two years ago, she told me " i was the only one, out of my siblings, who didnt turn out right and that she disowned me". how hurtful is that to hear from ur mother who wasnt there.
Fast forward, for this mothers day, i didnt even get a happy mothers day from my children or their father, whom i live with!! smh :/
WOW! THIS IS SO TRUE!! BUT IF IT IS A SIGNIFICANT OTHER AND THEY ARE A GOOD PERSON- HOW DO YOU COPE IF YOU HAVE BEEN THROUGH B.S. WITH OTHER MEN IN YOUR PAST?? DO YOU TRY TO HOLD A CANDLE FOR THEM OR LET IT GO??
Thanks for this video. I am 37 and never had children. My mom has issues with it because I am an only child, and she loves children. She always has friends who talk about their grandchildren, and she has none. I tease (try to make light of the situation) her saying, you would have increased your odds of having grandchildren if you had more than one. I can't say I don't want a child of my own, but I am not pressed about it. Happy early birthday to your grandma, 95 that is wonderful!
My mother and I have been through Hell together, and we've always been close. I have friends who have the opposite relationships with their mothers, and I've seen the exact same thing. They're selfish, and often cold. I have one friend who has repeated the same pattern with her son, its sad to see.
Wow a friend and I just had this same conversation last week. She lost her mom in March! My circle is very small for people I really can depend on and trust. I used to think it was bad, but now I realize that is really good! My grandmother raised me and my mom and I didn't really have a closes relationship until after my grannie died, but I am always a friend to others:) I don't have any sisters so I think that my friends are extremely important to me! I agree with what you are saying though.
Learning a person's background is very important no matter what type of relationship meaning male or female friendships. You have to see if a person has the strength to move past MOSTof the hurt,pain and anger they may have encountered. And if they can function in a positive,meaningful and reciprocative way keep them. Otherwise it's gonna be hard trying to raise an adult.......
@GoinBack2Naija Oh, do know when I finally thought everything through, I shed some tears. But like I said in the video, I see that in the grand scheme of things, it has nothing to do with me. They have issues that in no way reflect on me. I have realized this. It makes me sad, but to know how great of a Mom I had in my life, and they have a totally different experience, I have nothing to be sad about. I was loved by the best!
@AtlantaSistah RE: Your answer to "GoinBack" .....That is the finest answer! My mom would be locked up nowadays for the things she used to discipline me with, ie bottles, rocks, belts etc while step daddy just stayed out of it EVERY SINGLE DAY!
Maybe now I got my own children I realize what my mother was trying to achieve however horrible it was at the time!
Praise lord that you had a better experience (even though I know you must have got plenty licks too, ha ha) good for you!
Rach used to be at our home, so much that she didn't have to make groceries. As soon as ma died; Rach disappeared & made an excuse to not come to ma Monday funeral. then me & sis immediately STOPPED feeding her. me & sis left her alone!
ma died when i was 21 yrs old & sis was 19 yrs old. ma had got me & sis a home that's 45 mins away! ma made (i call her Rach) feel like she's at home. ma told Rach: you can spend the night with my girls, any time you want. ma would make enough groceries for us & Rach. Rach had NO friends in high school, but sis had warned me: i tried to be friends with her the 1st day b/c we was the only 2 blacks in the class BUT she ignored me; while trying to force the white students to be her friend!
I love this video.Still id wished you had advice for the people who had horrible relations with their mother other than a therapist. but then again you cant know unless you experience it right.
@HeirOfGlee You should check out Alexyss K Tylor. She is a pro on helping those with mama daughter drama. Her youtubes are alexyktylor and officialvpower. Her website is alexyssktylor . com (without the spaces).
I swear People today know NOTHING about true friends... I quit the Eagles club as I found out that a lot of my fathers friends were assholes... When he died.. Not one of them bothered to show their aas at his service! They are asses and DO NOT EARN THE respect of my father or my family.. People like that can stay away from me. Love and hugs on the loss of your mom... I lost my dad in July 09...
I swear this video was meant for me to hear....Thank you so much! My mom's been telling me this for years about one particular friend I had. This is so true!
Thanks for this video. As a person that had a very turbulent relationship with my mother you hit the nail right on the head. People do need to evaluate how a bad relationship with the mother can affect connections with others. Counseling and lots of meditation can help greatly in dealing with those issues so that these damaged individuals can begin nurturing themselves and forming the intimate relationships they desire. In all, u can't give what you weren't given. This video is much appreciated.
god bless you. i know today must be rough and people who are not grateful or the time they have to spend with their loved ones must annoy you, but i'm wishing you a happy mother's day even though your mom has passed.
@PeacefulVibes I'm cool. I had a great Mom. To have had her for 20 years is a blessing. Some folks don't get that. She loved me to pieces and know it.
This makes so much sense. Over the past 6 months or so I've started to evaluate my relationships with all of the people in my life and I've come to the same realization that you have and I don't blame them, I just know what to expect from them. Continue to spread the knowledge your mother left with you and your grandmother continues to give you and hopefully somebody's child who needs the information will receive it. I agree, not everyone should be a mother. You would be a great mother!
Good video, i have often thought about this with certain relationships i was going to take on with men. It came to mind that if they they have not had good relationships with there mothers how can they trust you. I have a guy friend in my life at the moment who does not have a good relationship with his mother, i know it is a issue but he does not talk about it and i don'y push it for him to talk about it yet, he is a really nice guy but i know there are issues.
healthyselfpeople 3 weeks ago
Hello,
I have been thinking about moving to Atlanta in a couple of years. I wanted to ask you what are some nice areas to buy or rent condos from?!? I heard Lawrenceville, McDonough and Stockbridge were all nice areas and only 30 minutes outside of Atlanta. Where are the 34 + crew staying?!? Lol Thanks so much! I need to go in person to check it out. Venus.perry@gmail.com
Stamfurdgurl 8 months ago
@Stamfurdgurl Sorry I am just now seeing this. Check out the downtown East Point and Downtown College Park area.
AtlantaSistah 5 months ago
This is a very interesting topic.
DearNadia 8 months ago
Amen@3:23, it's a sad type of betrayal, great vid
syckindahead 8 months ago
Wisdom...a gift from GOD...Although you're a cussin' sailor...LOL...it's all good...
kitabare76 8 months ago
My mother died when I was 22. Not a single 'friend' of mine showed up for her funeral, either.
fitnessdvdqueen 8 months ago
My mother was my first hater and when I developed enough courage to confront her she denied and justified her physical and verbal abuse. I have had to forgive her and just move on. I am also thankful for the other women God has placed in my life to love me and show me how to treat others. Nice video.
106harlem232 9 months ago 5
Wow, I hate to say that I could be one of those girls. I really appreciate this Atlanta.
maipai101 9 months ago
@maipai101 You? Really? Wow. Do a video response if you can.
AtlantaSistah 9 months ago
I also lost my mom when I was 19 and I had two close friends (well that I thought was close) who didn'rt show up to my mom's funeral. We just ended our friendships of 15++ years 2wk ago. It hurted a lot cause I know I was a good friend but life goes on. Thanks for making this vid Sis
Forced2Think 9 months ago
Quality, not quantity. You can have 1000 Facebook Friends, but what's the point if they're not REAL friends? I have very few true friends, but they're there for me. I don't need to collect friends just for the sake of it. I'd rather be a loner than have fakes by my side.
Heavenseventeen 9 months ago
im prob the only one going to write this. i came from that 'mom' but made me the opp. im always the bff. i dont take friendships or love lightly. my mom made it unsafe to need so i always gave friends time to prove loyalty but learnd that i was mirrorg what i wanted in that time. by the time i needed them it was too late
i kno im not the norm but often tried to find the common denom for selfish friends. it wasnt mom in my cases, some were only childrn. i think its a personality flaw not environ
cynthiarf 9 months ago 3
@RhashasRandomRanting ... Wow. That's terrible and I'm sure it hurt a great deal. Your story is an example of how a person can carry secret resentment and you have no clue. It happens more often than we realize. I've had a friend to reveal secret jealousy towards me after years of what I thought was a close sisterhood. I didn't have a clue either til the moment she exploded on me for no reason....Just know that you didn't MISS the signs, she HID them with smiles and hugs.
freetobemenoapology 9 months ago
i wish i couldve celebrated mothers day with my mother, but we have a fucked to the up relationship. she gave us up years ago, i was the only one in the foster care system. about two years ago, she told me " i was the only one, out of my siblings, who didnt turn out right and that she disowned me". how hurtful is that to hear from ur mother who wasnt there.
Fast forward, for this mothers day, i didnt even get a happy mothers day from my children or their father, whom i live with!! smh :/
88948895611499 9 months ago
WOW! THIS IS SO TRUE!! BUT IF IT IS A SIGNIFICANT OTHER AND THEY ARE A GOOD PERSON- HOW DO YOU COPE IF YOU HAVE BEEN THROUGH B.S. WITH OTHER MEN IN YOUR PAST?? DO YOU TRY TO HOLD A CANDLE FOR THEM OR LET IT GO??
spydagirl77 9 months ago
@spydagirl77 Not sure of the whole situation. Can you tell me more?
AtlantaSistah 9 months ago
WOW! THIS IS SO TRUE!!
spydagirl77 9 months ago
I love this video you always come with the knowledge
tssexychanel 9 months ago
sooooooooo true
bobothefofo 9 months ago
Thanks for this video. I am 37 and never had children. My mom has issues with it because I am an only child, and she loves children. She always has friends who talk about their grandchildren, and she has none. I tease (try to make light of the situation) her saying, you would have increased your odds of having grandchildren if you had more than one. I can't say I don't want a child of my own, but I am not pressed about it. Happy early birthday to your grandma, 95 that is wonderful!
koulanie73 9 months ago
My mother and I have been through Hell together, and we've always been close. I have friends who have the opposite relationships with their mothers, and I've seen the exact same thing. They're selfish, and often cold. I have one friend who has repeated the same pattern with her son, its sad to see.
blacksncommercials 9 months ago
This helped me a lot keep doing ya thang
THOMASTCT3 9 months ago
Wow a friend and I just had this same conversation last week. She lost her mom in March! My circle is very small for people I really can depend on and trust. I used to think it was bad, but now I realize that is really good! My grandmother raised me and my mom and I didn't really have a closes relationship until after my grannie died, but I am always a friend to others:) I don't have any sisters so I think that my friends are extremely important to me! I agree with what you are saying though.
caramelnaps25 9 months ago
Very good video deep man.
manweller1 9 months ago
truth!
andsanp 9 months ago
I am one that suffered from a broken and absent bond. So I know what you are talking about. Very good
garyjsimm 9 months ago
Learning a person's background is very important no matter what type of relationship meaning male or female friendships. You have to see if a person has the strength to move past MOSTof the hurt,pain and anger they may have encountered. And if they can function in a positive,meaningful and reciprocative way keep them. Otherwise it's gonna be hard trying to raise an adult.......
kareemtiheed 9 months ago
@GoinBack2Naija Oh, do know when I finally thought everything through, I shed some tears. But like I said in the video, I see that in the grand scheme of things, it has nothing to do with me. They have issues that in no way reflect on me. I have realized this. It makes me sad, but to know how great of a Mom I had in my life, and they have a totally different experience, I have nothing to be sad about. I was loved by the best!
AtlantaSistah 9 months ago 2
@AtlantaSistah RE: Your answer to "GoinBack" .....That is the finest answer! My mom would be locked up nowadays for the things she used to discipline me with, ie bottles, rocks, belts etc while step daddy just stayed out of it EVERY SINGLE DAY!
Maybe now I got my own children I realize what my mother was trying to achieve however horrible it was at the time!
Praise lord that you had a better experience (even though I know you must have got plenty licks too, ha ha) good for you!
UFCritical 9 months ago
excellent!!!!!!!!!!!
jimmyl324 9 months ago
(part 2)
Rach used to be at our home, so much that she didn't have to make groceries. As soon as ma died; Rach disappeared & made an excuse to not come to ma Monday funeral. then me & sis immediately STOPPED feeding her. me & sis left her alone!
keta4332 9 months ago
(part 1)
ma died when i was 21 yrs old & sis was 19 yrs old. ma had got me & sis a home that's 45 mins away! ma made (i call her Rach) feel like she's at home. ma told Rach: you can spend the night with my girls, any time you want. ma would make enough groceries for us & Rach. Rach had NO friends in high school, but sis had warned me: i tried to be friends with her the 1st day b/c we was the only 2 blacks in the class BUT she ignored me; while trying to force the white students to be her friend!
keta4332 9 months ago
Loved the Video AtlantaSistah.....Favorite!
JoJoStar22 9 months ago
Thank you so much for this video! You have a great head on your shoulders.
penguinworm 9 months ago
I love this video.Still id wished you had advice for the people who had horrible relations with their mother other than a therapist. but then again you cant know unless you experience it right.
HeirOfGlee 9 months ago
@HeirOfGlee I may do a follow up to this video. Not sure yet. But I do feel more needs to be said.
AtlantaSistah 9 months ago
@HeirOfGlee You should check out Alexyss K Tylor. She is a pro on helping those with mama daughter drama. Her youtubes are alexyktylor and officialvpower. Her website is alexyssktylor . com (without the spaces).
KATASTROPHI3 9 months ago
I swear People today know NOTHING about true friends... I quit the Eagles club as I found out that a lot of my fathers friends were assholes... When he died.. Not one of them bothered to show their aas at his service! They are asses and DO NOT EARN THE respect of my father or my family.. People like that can stay away from me. Love and hugs on the loss of your mom... I lost my dad in July 09...
courttube3 9 months ago
That was deep!
Catwalkification 9 months ago
@Catwalkification Indeed it is.
AtlantaSistah 9 months ago
I swear this video was meant for me to hear....Thank you so much! My mom's been telling me this for years about one particular friend I had. This is so true!
Essencejournal 9 months ago
Thanks for this video. As a person that had a very turbulent relationship with my mother you hit the nail right on the head. People do need to evaluate how a bad relationship with the mother can affect connections with others. Counseling and lots of meditation can help greatly in dealing with those issues so that these damaged individuals can begin nurturing themselves and forming the intimate relationships they desire. In all, u can't give what you weren't given. This video is much appreciated.
tru2me35 9 months ago
sorry about your mom. good info
skyyeblue101 9 months ago
god bless you. i know today must be rough and people who are not grateful or the time they have to spend with their loved ones must annoy you, but i'm wishing you a happy mother's day even though your mom has passed.
PeacefulVibes 9 months ago
@PeacefulVibes I'm cool. I had a great Mom. To have had her for 20 years is a blessing. Some folks don't get that. She loved me to pieces and know it.
AtlantaSistah 9 months ago
This makes so much sense. Over the past 6 months or so I've started to evaluate my relationships with all of the people in my life and I've come to the same realization that you have and I don't blame them, I just know what to expect from them. Continue to spread the knowledge your mother left with you and your grandmother continues to give you and hopefully somebody's child who needs the information will receive it. I agree, not everyone should be a mother. You would be a great mother!
Sassymarkrep 9 months ago
@Sassymarkrep Thank you!
AtlantaSistah 9 months ago
So true.
Buddhalocks 9 months ago