Vlog 7-31-07:Humans Cloaked in Gender Illusions

[carythalk1379]

"Next time he says you're aren't really a guy because you're not on testosterone, ask him what HE was before he started T." <--- I'm guessing he was probably a child.

I see this is an older video, but good for you for not listening to that bullshit. I hope you're rocking out. I'm a flamboyantly gay TRANS guy who wears eyeliner and tighter jeans than before I came out. I sometimes even do drag. Anyone who doesn't like it can suck my massive purple glitter cock. ^^

[noktelfa]

As an MtF, I know exactly where you're coming from... First, people told me that I can't be MtF because "women don't stand up to pee", which I explained I don't, and then "women shave their armpits", which I explained I do, and then because I was too good-looking as a man (pre-transition). They said that I was really just gay and looking for a way to have sex with men (apparently it's easier to change sex than to be openly gay).

[TheOriginalOrlando]

i find it annoying when people don't get that anybody can be as masculine or as feminine as they want, regardless of whether or not they are TG. transboys can be effeminate and transgirls can be butch, if it's what they want to be.

[xrenegadexsadizt]

Anyone who feels the need to cut down other people's gender identities as if their opinion is holy writ is probably compensating for something...or just a dullard. Not all men, trans or otherwise, have to look the same and act the same. One's internal sense of gender, whatever it may be, isn't necessarily defined by all the performative crap. Speaking of which, I'd love to see what would happen if Troll went up to Alexi Laiho and called him a girl...but I say too much.

[flyer11234]

I love when the cat non chalantly walks into the pic....while you're saying...'why don't you go fuck chris crocker? then the cat puts her ears back..lol...

[slimdudeDJC]

Your hair is beautiful!!! Sexy even. . . . whatever you may be identified as. ..

[tjaysone]

I think you are great. Only you know how you feel and what you want. If all guys were more like you, what a wonderful world it would be!! Ever see The Meaning of LIfe....Monty Python? the baby comes out and the first thing someone says is "is it a boy or girl" The Doc says "dont you think it is a bit early to impose roles on it?

[Elentaurel]

You and I are so much alike it's crazy! I used to care so much about passing as a guy, and having male mannerisms. But after a while I realized that passing didn't matter at all, because what other people thought was unimportant. So now I dress and act however I want, even if those mannerisms are "female." I consider myself pangendered more than f2m really. And why do some people consider long hair instantly "feminine"? So every guy with long hair is suddenly a women now? xD

[bluensunshine]

You know who you are! Life is a journey of becoming! On the Path love yourself and love others! However, I fully acknowledge there are so many people out there acting out of ignorance and belligerence; people who have no wish to understand or even pretend tolerance of difference. These people can be hard to deal with but still they deserve our compassion.

Lovennnnhuuuugggzzz from the UK

[MadonnasBigDick]

Next time he says you're aren't really a guy because you're not on testosterone, ask him what HE was before he started T.

(Presuming that he's also FtM. If not, then I've got nuttin'.)

[tjaysone]

It is hard to figure why anyone would want testosterone. I'm a 58 y/o guy who has wished he was female for 54 years. I can empathize, because I am similar yet opposite to you. But, I would also give anything to be in your shoes. I'm so glad you are so free in your thoughts, but your uniqueness would be hampered by the every guy dresses the same part of society.

[themonkeywrench]

I just don't understand some people.

This "act like a guy/girl" crap is simply using stereotypes of a group to assume how an individual should look or act.

Really pisses me off. I bet this guy wouldn't say that a man who cries was not actually a man, but a lesbian because he's not "acting like a man", i.e., not fitting inside emotionally crippling traditional gender roles.

[bucketoflead]

there's nothing worse than "trannier than thou" folks. much love from a trans semidyke with a boner for femme boys.

[TortoiseshellKat]

Hi Sam,

just watching this video your whole prescence, mannerisms, vocal intonation everything certainly come across as masculine. Good look getting T. And don't let anyone tell you you are less of a trans male just 'cos you have long hair. You totally rock!

I'm M2F2genderqueer and had to endure a load of shit off people telling me that I shouldn't have transitioned. Now I'd actually like to have mixed hormones.

[slayerchic3]

you go sam!

[brighidskiss]

Hey Sam,as an FtM who is also not on T & has not had surgery,I have 1 question - are you sure this guy who is dissing you is not a MtF who is jealous?LOL ;)Dude,you read more male than most GMs I know,you remind me very much of my friend Taylor who is also a pre-everything transguy & VERY much a male,you 2 sound very alike & your mannerisms are almost identical!Keep being you,don't let the idiots get to you & keep posting!I owe you big ;)

Daniel

[allattitude]

You are very well spoken and seem to know exactly who you are. I really respect that. I'm looking forward to watching more of your vids. I have a few questions if you don't mind my asking, but I think I would rather ask you privately...

[JezebelDecibel]

Identity and behavior are totally separate; you can call yourself what ever you like.

Gender is analogue not digital; we have the right to be different.

[peaceandparty]

absolutely-i am glad you can also say it like it is to the yet unaware people here!hello

[notjustforxmas]

exactly the same as being female. I'm very effeminate in a lot of ways, but I've always seen myself as being a bit of a girly-boy faggy (straight) guy, there's obviously a difference.

[notjustforxmas]

Hey, really loved this video. I think maybe one problem is that more transmen who are 'obviously male' in the way they act & dress (more stereotypically male) are the ones that get noticed more and stereotyped as what most or all transmen are as there is a more noticable contrast (before they have hormones/surgery) between their birth sex & appearance. I can totally imagine you being a guy, but i think that guy doesn't understand because he sees you as quite effeminate & he thinks that thats

[alex80uk]

Thanks Sam! I really think its great what you said in your video. It is cool that someone actually speaks honestly and doesn't hide or forget their trueselves. You made me feel better after feeling very down about myself. Take care of yourself and I look forward to future videos from you.

[genderfluidjelly]

This video made me laugh so hard and you handled the whole thing so damn well, I'm really starting to love your videos, the more I get round to watching them all.

[supergirl1234512345]

take the male hormonr ..be brave to choose , be brave to accept yourself

[peaceandparty]

i disagree......i took testosterone 13 years.....i am xxy....me and sam deserve other categories....i am ftmtf personally........so people start to understand there arent just males and females!ok`?

[SNIPER78580]

You really fascinate me. ;) You're a pretty/hot guy/girl

[carythalk1379]

PS - Mighty presumptive of whoever that was to assume that because you're an FtM that you like women (given that he called you a lesbian multiple times). I know LOTS of gay male FtMs, as well as several bi and pansexual FtMs. Gender and orientation are totally separate things. Duh!

[carythalk1379]

Sam,

I am an FtM as well... and I really hate it when people say I'm not "trans enough" or "man enough" to be that way. Last year I could've been the prom queen... this year... well, let's just say I get some interesting looks if I use the women's bathroom. There's no one way to be trans, and kudos for calling out the people who are STILL trying to reinforce some archaic notion of what gender is or should be. Keep fighting hon!

~Cary

[boondoggler]

hulka99, why are you insinuating that the video-maker should "just be butch" because of what you perceive to be effeminate behavior?

I've known of FTM's who, after transitioning, identify as gay men. What about this? Just another blurring of the lines. There are no rules that dictate who CAN and who CANNOT.

When it's all said and done, we are all just "doing" gender.

[hulka99]

Well, I'd appreciate your point of view more more if you were a gender rebel, a boyish girl, instead you are trying to embrace a rigid gender role, "boy".

[fugazi0311]

One can't please evryone all the time.

[kimberlyann5]

why are you worried about this guy? don't get that. people disagree, forget it

[hulka99]

No, I still don't understand. The femmes I've enjoy as lovers never wanted to be "girls"...but playing with gender roles and appearance was fun. Dressing up was not some expression of their desire to be a girl, it was just "fun". I'd not have a problem with you being a gender rebel, but rather you're trying to be a "boy". It seems that you really aren't "tg", you're more gender rebel. Rebelling against the stereotypical role of a "girl". That's what I don't get.

[SamC74]

How can you make the statement "It seems that you really aren't tg" after earlier saying you "don't believe in TG"?? If you don't believe in something, then it can't be defined by you (whether rigidly or otherwise) since you simply don't believe it exists.

[hulka99]

You are mixing up "transgender" with your desire to break out of sterotypical gender roles, that's how I read you. Why not just be a girl whose not feminate, but butch, and boyish? That's my point. I've had boyfriends that were into being femmes and all, but none wanted to change their gender. They were femmes, and happy to be like that. At any rate, I support your right to be "yourself", so let's just let it go at that.

[SamC74]

I know myself and I will do what's right for me. I'm done with this discussion.

[GiantBlueDragon]

You don't understand what it's like to feel this way, so you really can't comment. End of. The reason you don't get it is because you don't understand the way Sam - and others like Sam - feel. (That was addressed to hulka99 by the way)

[hulka99]

I'm not disputing your desire to break out of gender norms, but you seem to want to embrace them instead. That's the difference of opinion between us. I LIKE femmes (effeminate males), and I find butches (Tomboy girls) interesting. But that's not the direction you seem to be going to. So You could be a lot more then a "boy" by being a boy-girl, I guess that's what I'm say. Whatever you decide, I wish the best of luck in getting it.

[SamC74]

Since you're someone who appreciates effeminate males, I'm wondering why you don't "get it". I've always idolized men with long hair and an androgynous appearance. If I had been born male, that's the kind of man I'd be. It makes sense then, me being a transguy, for me to naturally emulate androgynous/"effeminate" men. Understand now?

[hulka99]

Okay, genitalia=gender, but it's more complicated then that. Gender is hard wired in the brain. Have you read that story about the boy that that was operated on at birth to be a female, because some idiot believed that gender was "socialized". The operation, the hormones, the "socialization" couldn't make him FEMALE! Go...follow your muse, project to others the image you want, but you're just not MALE! I don't know what's so great about being male anyway.

[SamC74]

I did NOT say that socialization alone forms someone's gender, but it is a significant factor. I AM who I say I am. No one knows me better than me. I'm curious as to why you're telling me, a total stranger, who and what I am when you know NONE of my history. Face your own issues and back off of transgendered people.

[hulka99]

Well, first of all, you invited comments. Secondly, I'm not disputing your right to be who you want to be. Third, we can have a discussion on the concept of "transgender" without you insulting my views on the subject. I'm really not your enemy, I just disagree with you.

[SamC74]

You said so yourself that you don't believe in transgender. There are only males and females in your view of the world. Yes, I disagree with that viewpoint but it's not really your viewpoint that bothers me. It was your statement that I am a female that is unappreciated. How would you respond if I said you're a FEMALE? Would you let that comment stand uncorrected? Furthermore, how should a person properly respond to having their gender identity repeatedly dismissed?

[hulka99]

If you called me a female, well that would obviously be so incrediable, everyone would say you're crazy. I'm not calling you crazy though, nor am I disputing your right to break out of your socialization or portray yourself in any way you find comfortable. I'm just saying that you are not a boy, and you'll never be a boy.

[hulka99]

I don't believe in "trangender" either...I agree with the guy you're complaining about. You're totally NOT a boy. You look like a girl, talk like a girl, and more importantly, seem to think like a girl. For example, your reaction that to this guy's honest opinion is "harassment"! Totally a girl reaction! Just be yourself, an individual, which might be outside the mainstream of social definations of gender. But you can't be a "boy", no matter how hard you try.

[SamC74]

You don't believe in "trangender"? hmmm... and you say that I "seem to think like a girl". How would you know how a girl thinks anyway, unless you ARE one? It seems to me that you think like an uneducated, narrow-minded idiot (but that's just this guy's honest opinion... don't get all sensitive and "girly" and take offense!) :-D

[hulka99]

Uh, well then how can you claim to know you are a boy? As for myself, I've been intimately involved with women since I was born, starting with my mother, a series of girlfriends, a wife, and a lover after that. Vive a la difference. I'm not disputing your right to project yourself in the way you want, just don't think for a second you are a boy. You are so FEMALE!

[SamC74]

OK so I appear female to you (the way I talk, mannerisms, etc.) Well, 30-something years of being socialized as female will do that to a person... you should try it sometime and let's see how YOU would turn out. :D Since you "don't believe in transgender", are you one of those who believe that genitalia = gender? It seems like it.

[vickiedavis]

Don't let the morons effect you. They can not possibly understand how we feel inside.

[NeoStardaisy28]

but i did have a question, if ur a ftm, did u just come out? do you just see urself as more of just a guy who wants more of a androgene but slightly masculine look? I have seen some guys who were like that, I honestly think they look better than most f2m that are straight, I guess it's because they usually go on T and stop after a while and have that "gay guy" look, and most girls are attracted to that. like prince for example i guess... i think ur totally cool, i'm totally subscribing... ( =

[NeoStardaisy28]

that guy is a dumbass, and a sexist if you ask me. it shouldn't matter how u look what you wear, what u do. being a boy doesn't mean wearing pants, not wearing makeup, playing football, or anything, u don't even really need testosterone to be a man. all u need 2 be a man is to say ur 1 in my opinion. this happens to with some m2f, it's just too hard for them to see that a "man" is really a girl inside.. and I get mad when they question some1's gender...

[adamrayne]

Dude. First of all, random note, you're a very pretty guy. I'm not saying this in a creepy way, just letting you know. Second, trolls are a pest on mankind, and what can you do. Third, "men should be manly and women should cower in the kitchen" is indeed a common opinion, but not one you should waste time and heartache on :) This post is old, I know. I watched a couple of your posts, not all, but wanted to leave a note. You're doing great. You're inspiring.

[magnavoxtv]

are you really 33?

[SamC74]

Yep.

[magnavoxtv]

wow you look very young

[arawrebirth20]

just be you always. people like that have NOTHING better to do than to be a jackass.

[manniefaces]

Transgender means so much more than what so many people have in mind. Education is the key. I hope the vlogs done by the transgender community on you tube helps to correct some of the misconceptions.

[bleedingembryo]

Do I need to throw a brotha down? It's not always about passing - it's about LIVING truthfully to yourself. If you're satisfied, what does it fucking matter? Tell that guy off for real. <3

[Achillesinhistent]

This guy attacked Sam's intelligence, sex, gender, and orientation, repeatedly, in a variety of ways. He called her a moron. He attacked her bodily by suggesting she doesn't count unless she's on testosterone. He said she was too "feminine" to be an ftm, by how she talked & sang. He called her a lesbian. This is not expressing an opinion. This is a personal attack using every means possible to put Sam down.

Sam, this vacuous, infantile twit will eventually drown in his own patheticness.

[PatPaulJ]

you could have also just deleted those comments of that guy. but you didn't. instead you talked about it. keep on teaching people, Sam!

[TrannyBot]

Dear Sam,

You are who you say you are!

You are you!

Don't let anyone tell you who you are, boy! Sounds like you didn't. There are many ftms transexuals or not that are not butch... this person is just ignorant. They are obviously really stuck on the gender binary system. So antiquated.

Love, Avi

[dajuzpokojstymheslom]

I dont think he was harasing you. He was just expressing his opinion. Everybody has right to do that. You do the same thing.

[SamC74]

Yeah, and my opinion is that he was harrassing me. Name-calling is harrassment. Period.

[silencioplz]

Sam, do you think that you have a certain female privilege over other FTMs because you pass so well as a female and do not have the dire need to transition? Those FTMs believe it's a matter of life and death that they have to become male in physical form. Maybe that's what he's angry about you taking the FTM label without having to face the real struggles? It's a transgender vs. transsexual dilemma.

[SamC74]

Some trans people do not ever make changes to their bodies, or are unable to for medical or financial reasons. Whether you (or anyone else) believe I have "female privilege" or not, doesn't change the fact that I feel completely out of place in all-women's spaces. My struggles with this are mainly internal but that doesn't make them any less real, as you put it. Would you also infer that passable transmen have "male privilege"?

[silencioplz]

Okay, I was playing D.A. (Devil's Advocate). I really don't know what that guy's problem is, then.

[silencioplz]

Are you still trans-questioning? Just to answer your questions and not b/c I side with the rude guy: Real in the sense that people judge us on the way we look (no one would've known, especially if you and your bf pass as a regular heterosexual couple), so you may not experience exactly the same struggles as the pre-T/op in terms of societal treatment and discrimination with transsexuals. The passable transmen earned (in a manner of speaking) their badge by doing their time.

[SamC74]

There's no doubt in MY mind that I am trans. The questioning part is "what am I going to do about it?" and "how will I pay for it?" Nothing in my life has been easy and I don't expect this to be either. I am earning my "badge", whether other people acknowledge it or not.

[silencioplz]

Okay, so it's how to go about the particulars of the male image you want and affording it that is keeping you back. Yes, all the ftm badge you need is the fact of attesting to your existence. Is your lover supportive of who you are?

[SamC74]

I don't know... I haven't met my lover yet. haha

[silencioplz]

Don't you have a lover? Oh. Okay, I mean, partner. Btw, you've aged pretty well for your age.:)

[SamC74]

About passing: What is the point in being recognized for what/who you are if you have to appear like a stranger to yourself to achieve it? People are going to think whatever they want to, regardless of what I say or how I change my look. I'm not telling other transguys what they should do with their hair or what clothing to wear. That's a personal choice...

[SamC74]

Passing is not top priority for me, being an individual IS. Why do people attempt to invalidate transgendered people who are like myself? Fear? Insecurity? We ARE out here... we DO exist, and we're showing how full the spectrum truly is and making our voices heard.

[silencioplz]

I think you'll make a great looking guy with long hair and a slim and athletic build. I think some people demand physical proof what they can't believe with their eyes. Yeah, I would guess fear of what is different plays into it, too, and their own insecurities and pressures of passing or not.

[TheDarkAceXIII]

That guy has issues. We are all different and no one is the same and looks the same. I don't think he gets that. You are just being yourself and look whatever you like. Did you block this guy from your channel?

Ace

[xantoniolovelacex]

oh my god i've had this so many times!! people always make stupid assumptions about masculine and feminine, they never look at the scale in between - just keep being yourself, you rock and thanks for the comments xx ant

[thepotplant]

That is just an awesome systematic destruction of some morons abuse of you. Fantastic. Be proud of yourself and your security in your identity.

[kieron2007]

what the **** does he not know that sexuality and gender identity as nothing to do with each other!! what a dick!

[nothingoth]

Don't worry Sam - other people have said it here better than me. I suppose I would count as a "feminine" ftm...and I'm all post-op and years down the track now. I guess this guy has a pretty small life, and his comments reflect that- keep your thick skin on, man. I have a funny feeling the strong feelings on "his" part are more to do with "his" own issues - probably worry about his own lack of masculinity.

[figtus]

Right on, Sam. When people try to tell people who they are, it pisses me off to no end. That guy was just flaunting his own ignorance right and left.

[Achillesinhistent]

We are all androgynous- each of us, helplessly & forever, contains the other- male in female, female in male- We are a part of each other. Many of my countrymen appear to find this fact exceedingly inconvenient & even unfair, & so, very often, do I. But none of us can do anything about it. -James Baldwin. :)

[silencioplz]

Yes, male vs. female is an illusion. Gender is an illusion. We all have "male" and "female" inside us. What he may be angry with is male vs. female in the physical, biological term?

[nytransguy]

i see it... your a guy that is.. and i think it is cool your on yt because i've never seen an ftm like you.. thats awesome that it is not all about passing, i think that says more about who you are and the fact that your not concerned with what others see

as an ftm i think i have been guilty of over-compensation to have my masculine identity realized (and i've seriously injured myself in the process- long story)

so yea fuck em :D

[ladyanarchy82]

guess im a ftm. FUCK THEM! he is prolly some nasty old hairy sweaty piece of crap. i wouldnt worry about it. r u a lesbian baby? single? hahaha just fuckin with u. i think your hot tho forget them fags. sounds like he was on pot or something. that or he is a 10 yr old. blah!

[radioreed]

i agree with sam's stance on this video, and the guy responding to Sam was indeed a dick, but is it really neccesary to call him a "fag"?

[nicanicamad]

This person is projecting something about himself onto you--maybe an FTM with a distorted ego? Very odd messages to you--yea--what motivation does he have?