Genesis Chapters 1 - 33: The Wondrous Acts Of God

[8698gil]

I might sound angry, and maybe that's because I am. I'm sick and tired of religionists telling me that god didn't help me because I was "selfish", or "I didn't understand his plan". WTF is his plan, anyway? As an eight year old girl, is there any reason why I should have understood why god did not want to help me? Was I supposed to wait until I died to find out? Yes, I'm angry that I was a little girl who needed help and didn't get it from the god she was supposed to believe in.

[BeBoBli]

5:30 bottom-left corner:

Is that... a small puppy?

[Huttate1]

@BeBoBli My expert opinion sat to my right hand side - makes the observation that Fido is an art convention to illustrate fidelity. That is why images of royals often include a dog at the feet of the female.

[BeBoBli]

@Huttate1

Thanks for the insight. Nevermind my ignorance of dog breeds, but I just found it odd that it would be used to illustrate a scene that otherwise seems to have the goal of expressing historical accuracy when I don't think I could imagine such a breed being around during that time. Not like I expected 'historical accuracy' to be found anywhere in the bible or any of it's artistic depictions, but the fact that it's more symbolic than anything makes a lot more sense.

[BeBoBli]

@Huttate1

Also I officially lack a libido for noticing the dog before the tits.

[tmhteacher]

A beautiful story for the holidays. This is nothing but Desperate Housewives, in the desert.

[richardmoz]

good one. Nice story!

[rollofnickles]

speak slower, please!!!.... >_<

[Huttate1]

@rollofnickles I know, I know. But it is a balance between getting the story out and trying not to expect people to spend too much of their valuable time watching my offerings. I shall try to slow it down a little next time.

[Wordavee1]

God and Gaddafi, nice parallel!!

[Louiseskybunker]

and what an art history lesson!, I lost 2 marks at college for saying "Murillo's virgin looks like she's had a bit"... keep up the good work Huttate. x

[MrWill7980]

Huttate1, kind sir, are a man of my own heart. At 1:45 you stated what I have for years! I doff my hat and salute you.

[torrid426]

@MrWill7980

ysually theist start quoting scripture loudly at this point. Never fails to make me laugh.

[MrWill7980]

@torrid426 THat's been my experiance too. The "LaLa Complex" i call it. "I'M TALKING LOUDER! I CAN'T HEAR YOU! LA LA LA!" Hitler once said "If repeat a lie often enough, loud enough people will believe it." He was doing Gods work and the Nazi motto is Gott Mitt Unz (Uns?) God is with us.

I laugh at them too. That, or give them the poker face

[DaithiDublin]

Excellent! But you glossed over Jacob and Laban's casual discussion of artificial selection, where Jacob blinded Laban with science and shafted him out of the strongest cattle. Thus preceding Darwin's insights by a few thousand years, exploiting the very evolutionary mechanism that his god's defenders would eventually deny, but which God himself obviously liked enough for him to pop down and squeeze Jacob's thigh and give him a whole country. Well, for a while, at least.

[Ermac514]

The tone of the narrative is delightful. Great job.

[Huttate1]

@Ermac514 Thank you so much for the support.

[mrog70]

great choice of paintings

[practicalmagic9]

i noticed that wildwoodclaire1 favorited, so i was more than intrigued!great job!

[Huttate1]

@practicalmagic9 ooh! If I have catwoman onside then I must be doing something right.

[FreindlyRanger]

Concise, succinct and fucking hilarious. And it reminded me to look up Deus Ex Machina, so now I remember what that is too, hooray.

[WildwoodClaire1]

Utterly delightful!

[Huttate1]

@WildwoodClaire1 Thank you so much. Big praise indeed from my favourite Fulham fan.

[darkmattermarshall02]

You are funny and intelligent.

[Huttate1]

@darkmattermarshall02 Comments like that make the effort worthwhile. Thank you.

[XheraPhine]

Absolutly brilliant from start to finish!

[777ren]

Excellent . Ive favored & put up on my Facebook page..

[Huttate1]

@777ren Well thank you for that.

[HoaxKillerFriend]

Well done, as always, my friend!

[Huttate1]

@HoaxKillerFriend Thanks for the support.

[AuntieDiluvian]

The bible is an abomination. It's time it was binned - it's no use for anything unless you're into really shitty bronze-age stories.

[CATMAHAT]

@AuntieDiluvian Not true, Auntie. When I was a young whip, I rolled some monster joints from the hemp paper copies.

[rriverstone1]

I just woke up. Yours is the 1st video I've watched today. I finished my 1st cup of coffee while watching, which was a challenge, as I laughed convulsively, without warning, and the keyboard is directly in front of my mouth. I love how fast you read this, and how dead-pan. It was rather like hearing someone in the grocery store describing the plot of a really cheesy soap opera. Beautiful

[Huttate1]

@rriverstone1 Thanks for the nice comment. I think it can only be delivered as a straight man. All the comedy is in the text.

[aMulliganStew]

A drawn out homage to Young Will Hunting's response to "Why not join the NSA," Love it!!

[Zentz29]

Yea, it sounds really fucking stupid when you break it down. As far as I can tell you got it right. lol

[Huttate1]

@Zentz29 I tried only to quote what is written in the good book - simply updating the language.

[krissyeh]

Why is the bible not rated XXX.

[robertwlester]

these videos should be put on DVDs and handed out for free outside churches, it may just turn a head or two from the divine psychopath

[derek24hudson]

Brilliant! Yes, there are people who believe all of this. There is no limit to the credulity of the faithful.

[robertwlester]

the incest must have been ok because god was going through one of his many kinky phases, he seems to get a hankering for all sorts of strange practices, the more insane the better.

[robertwlester]

cool video