As a woman and a feminist, I don’t find it sexist when a guy holds the door for me. I see it as a nice gesture; however, I don’t demand it or feel entitled to it. I hold doors for men too. I see it more as an act of courtesy akin to saying “bless you” when someone sneezes.
Entitlement is annoying. You shouldn’t be expected to be treated like a prince or princess. You have hands, use them. Haha
I find Japanese customs and social norms to be so perplexing and contradictory. They never reveal their true feelings, which is very frustrating for me. I am not a mind reader, do not expect me to know what you are thinking, especially if you saying something completely opposite.
Whenever I was nice to my Japanese lab partner, he said he felt burdened. I was annoyed that my nice gesture was being received negatively. Yeah…I will never understand the Japanese concept of debt and burden. Haha
Interesting. Very contradicting points. I personaly feel strange when someone does it for me. I feel like I should have beat them to it! Lol I guess everyone has to have their own opportunity to show kindness,and every INDIVIDUAL has their own way of doing it.
Oops my comment cut off... I feel like "Should I run to the door as to not make them wait that long with the door open?" LOL it's ackward for everyone involved in that case. Personally, Japan's way sounds better.
I think most Americans don't consider the other person's feelings when opening a door for them. Rather they feel hurt or undervalued if someone didn't hold a door open for them so that's why everyone automatically keeps the door open for others to walk through. It's the "do unto others what you want to be done to yourself" mentality. However, I personally find it annoying sometimes when people are so far ahead of you and they open a door waiting for you to go through. Am I suppose to run for t
Haha I understand your feeling. Totally. I'd also feel kind of sorry to make someone feel they have to hurry when I keep the door opened for them from far away.
Haha I understand your feeling. Totally. I'd also feel kind of sorry to make someone feel they have to hurry when I keep the door opened for them from far away.
I think that holding the door for someone, while it is still widely done in the US, is more traditional than contemporary. In most grocery stores or department stores we have automatic sliding doors. I guess nowadays you'd see people holding doors for people in restaurants or smaller stores such as conveience stores. It actually happened quite often on my college campus as you walk in and out of so many doors each day. (I'll put the rest in a separate comment)
:O I didn't know that... I open the door for people all the time (pretty much everyday) I usually feel bad if I dont open the door. Or I'm afraid i'll hit them with the door if i dont. (I've done that before ^^;)
@emikoakuma That's so kind of you then! What is funny is, when you open doors for somebody or anybody, you can't stop it just before someone. lol You will have to wait until no one comes.
Politeness is such a weird thing...Men open a door to very older women, men...but young women do the same thing to much older men and women... It's actually not about treating girls as princesses but counting them in physical weaker social ranking. :D You can carry a children bags too and let them go in first!
Well...I think it is NATURAL if a man open a door to woman, especially if they are in some kind of relationship. Like older brother and his sister, father and daughter or boyfriend and girlfriend etc. Or if there is suddenly woman going right after a couple he will let the other woman to go first too. Otherwise, that kind of depends....
i can understand this appeal of a more supportive wife.. i mean, every good man needs a good woman to support him :)
and i understand what youre trying to say about some women who are a bit much.... theyre kind of like feminists? they want to be treated like a queen, yet they also want to be treated like a man would... it doesnt make sense. girls are crazy :P
just be polite & kind. most people appreciate it. some get mad at you for helping them, but you should smile & do it anyway :)
dude do you practice martial arts or do some kind of sport? oh what's you favorite song from the beatles? and the lady first is traditionally for Europe, Central America and South America.
As a woman and a feminist, I don’t find it sexist when a guy holds the door for me. I see it as a nice gesture; however, I don’t demand it or feel entitled to it. I hold doors for men too. I see it more as an act of courtesy akin to saying “bless you” when someone sneezes.
Entitlement is annoying. You shouldn’t be expected to be treated like a prince or princess. You have hands, use them. Haha
EternalRhapsody 1 month ago
I find Japanese customs and social norms to be so perplexing and contradictory. They never reveal their true feelings, which is very frustrating for me. I am not a mind reader, do not expect me to know what you are thinking, especially if you saying something completely opposite.
Whenever I was nice to my Japanese lab partner, he said he felt burdened. I was annoyed that my nice gesture was being received negatively. Yeah…I will never understand the Japanese concept of debt and burden. Haha
EternalRhapsody 1 month ago
Interesting. Very contradicting points. I personaly feel strange when someone does it for me. I feel like I should have beat them to it! Lol I guess everyone has to have their own opportunity to show kindness,and every INDIVIDUAL has their own way of doing it.
Great topic! Thanks for bringing it up.
mspulgis22 4 months ago
@mspulgis22 thanks for your comments.
You are welcome
jp10IamMeNotU 3 months ago
Oops my comment cut off... I feel like "Should I run to the door as to not make them wait that long with the door open?" LOL it's ackward for everyone involved in that case. Personally, Japan's way sounds better.
forgottenmemories21 5 months ago
@forgottenmemories21 So, it is "case by case."
jp10IamMeNotU 5 months ago
I think most Americans don't consider the other person's feelings when opening a door for them. Rather they feel hurt or undervalued if someone didn't hold a door open for them so that's why everyone automatically keeps the door open for others to walk through. It's the "do unto others what you want to be done to yourself" mentality. However, I personally find it annoying sometimes when people are so far ahead of you and they open a door waiting for you to go through. Am I suppose to run for t
forgottenmemories21 5 months ago
@forgottenmemories21 It is interesting. I didn't know. But I like it!
Haha I understand your feeling. Totally. I'd also feel kind of sorry to make someone feel they have to hurry when I keep the door opened for them from far away.
jp10IamMeNotU 5 months ago
@forgottenmemories21 It is interesting. I didn't know. But I like it!
Haha I understand your feeling. Totally. I'd also feel kind of sorry to make someone feel they have to hurry when I keep the door opened for them from far away.
jp10IamMeNotU 5 months ago
I think that holding the door for someone, while it is still widely done in the US, is more traditional than contemporary. In most grocery stores or department stores we have automatic sliding doors. I guess nowadays you'd see people holding doors for people in restaurants or smaller stores such as conveience stores. It actually happened quite often on my college campus as you walk in and out of so many doors each day. (I'll put the rest in a separate comment)
forgottenmemories21 5 months ago
@forgottenmemories21 Anyways, I appreciate that custom.
jp10IamMeNotU 5 months ago
:O I didn't know that... I open the door for people all the time (pretty much everyday) I usually feel bad if I dont open the door. Or I'm afraid i'll hit them with the door if i dont. (I've done that before ^^;)
emikoakuma 5 months ago
@emikoakuma That's so kind of you then! What is funny is, when you open doors for somebody or anybody, you can't stop it just before someone. lol You will have to wait until no one comes.
jp10IamMeNotU 5 months ago
@jp10IamMeNotU Thank you! ^-^ I know! I cant let go of the door because if I do I'd hit someone!
emikoakuma 5 months ago
Politeness is such a weird thing...Men open a door to very older women, men...but young women do the same thing to much older men and women... It's actually not about treating girls as princesses but counting them in physical weaker social ranking. :D You can carry a children bags too and let them go in first!
purplemiii 5 months ago
@purplemiii It's just a matter of kindness. There's no "rule," but nice feeling after doing it and being done it by someone.
jp10IamMeNotU 5 months ago
@purplemiii It's just a matter of kindness. There's no "rule," but nice feeling after doing it and being done it by someone.
jp10IamMeNotU 5 months ago
Well...I think it is NATURAL if a man open a door to woman, especially if they are in some kind of relationship. Like older brother and his sister, father and daughter or boyfriend and girlfriend etc. Or if there is suddenly woman going right after a couple he will let the other woman to go first too. Otherwise, that kind of depends....
purplemiii 5 months ago
@purplemiii Yeah that's what I thought, expected. But this guy didn't hold the door opened for his lady. lol
And thanks, I will keep that in mind.
jp10IamMeNotU 5 months ago
i can understand this appeal of a more supportive wife.. i mean, every good man needs a good woman to support him :)
and i understand what youre trying to say about some women who are a bit much.... theyre kind of like feminists? they want to be treated like a queen, yet they also want to be treated like a man would... it doesnt make sense. girls are crazy :P
just be polite & kind. most people appreciate it. some get mad at you for helping them, but you should smile & do it anyway :)
annabellemee 5 months ago
@annabellemee I agree with you that a good man needs a good wife.
Yeah, I will only be polite and kind. :)
jp10IamMeNotU 5 months ago
dude do you practice martial arts or do some kind of sport? oh what's you favorite song from the beatles? and the lady first is traditionally for Europe, Central America and South America.
ferrarixxz 5 months ago