This is not an Ashley

[johhnyo333]

You are very brave, I would love to have the nerve to do what you did, I find it wonderful to make love with a man but if is difficult with my cock there all the time. Hope you know what I mean

[JR0d2002]

i like chicks who do anal

[hessypie]

You look like a man. And lose some weight.

[dlewis1498]

@hessypie I'd fuck it.

[91jgphonecall]

youre cute

[cutiemecfee]

YOUR SO FREAKING! pretty...

[Am3ie2010]

ToBeHonest you dont know nothing about anything..... YOUR just a fake ???

[pgy002]

@Am3ie2010 You don't know anything about grammar, It's YOU'RE. and it's not "you don't know NOTHING"

[TheMalinTransition]

So yeah, this feels exactly like being a full time manly man male. Just scripted responses to culturally percieved ideas of good and normal. Ugh! Your videos inspire me on an intellectual level. I tend to ruminate on the authenticity of my gender a lot these days, and this helps. Thank you!

[miaXkitty]

Nice vid and great idea. Here is an idea for you:

In essence, isn't all 'art' fake then? As in: the moment you attempt to "capture" something, you sort of lose it...

Everything that we, as the human species, attempts to use as a medium to connect "you" the audience into "me" the artist becomes it's own barrier. Thus preventing the audience from actually getting "into" the essence of the artist. The viewer/ reader/ observer never actually gets to the center of the observation.

[FUArock]

you look like a boner

[mastachiefs49]

@FUArock OH MY FUCKING GOD DUDE... Funniest shit I have heard all day.. Thumbs up 4 u XD

[Am3ie2010]

@FUArock PMFSL

[mrcalistine]

You gotta love how people taboo genitals being part of society and noone even sees them. Yet with a trans person, they mean EVERYTHING and if they dont hide what should been hidden you're fake. God forbid -_-

[Quokka57]

...and...to add to my previous comment... I'm sick to death of hearing the blase attitude towards 'my people'...only to hear the Media beat-up when some poor bloody Muslim dark-skinned dude gets whacked. I mean really, aren't we ALL equal? Male. Female. White. Black. Muslim. Catholic. Hindu. Indian. Jap. And anything in-between? So why then is it universally accepted as "oh dear...just another Whitey male got blown away last night" ??? Life is precious. We're all equal. And it matters...

[Quokka57]

Dude-esse....

Some SERIOUS issues there.

The 'feminist' chick? What's her bag?

Why put yourself out there if you can't handle criticism? And you think that being a Bloke is all that easy? Check your stats honey - what race, gender and sexual persuasion are most likely to be 'murdered'? In case your memory needs jogging, it's white, heterosexual MALES. I left 'religion' out of it deliberately - cos that would be 'white, catholic, heterosexual, MALE' then. Do the math...

[csrtitus]

Are you done making videos?

[masterjust74]

You are really beautiful Ashley!!! You are not a freak at the best of you is in you and only in you!!! Your Image is a mirror of your soul!! You are so sweet and beautifull!!! I hope to see you another of your video story!!! I like to know all about of you!!! sorry for my english I'm Italian!!!

[SJofDecatur]

I'm not sure what all this real & fakeness is about... I really just wanted to comment on the video "Stealth is Wrong"

However, I don't agree that scripting is fake- I think it is important to focus your rationales about important issuez and experiences...

[sk8forever12]

go suck a cock cuz we all no thats really wat u want to do.y the fuck would u change from a gay male to a wannabe women.transvestite.do u have a vagina cuz u no u said u had breasts so thats pretty fucked up.

[ThugLifeMusic1]

Cunt.

[tomken8dy]

We all wear masks.

"Fake" is not always false.

We reveal different facets of

ourselves in different situations.

[wendy11372a]

depends on if your doing a documentary or entertaining. We like both. Look at actors. People fall in love with characters who are often quite different from their real selves.

[idk247]

I don't agree... fully.

you're right about SOME fakeness...

but everyone really is being there self...

but some people put videos up here that are "scripted" or "practiced"

but most are unplanned...

[BarefootRadio]

You have not posted a new video in a very long time. I just wanted to say I hope you're doing well. That is all. ;)

[sweetsmile1]

i'm so glad u made this video! i have struggled with this for a long time! All your points on this video are right on! i need to favorite this vid so i can go back and look at it periodically. Thanks!

[wookieleader]

omg dumd corpse

[TheBlackscorpion90]

I want to say I'm a straight married man but, I think you are beautiful and I enjoy watching your videos and finally subscribed.

[XendmustB2]

@WastedYouthCrew1 Dont worry man. I will kill this monster!

[skurlik2120]

I just wanna say I admire you so much. Although I'm a gay man who has never identified as trans, I find your videos extremely informative and interesting. Plus, you're gorgeous! Keep up the awesome work!

[Liekkek]

i'd renounce my faith in females and in god if i looked like that BWAHAHA BWAHAHA

[wardyladohaye]

omg just watched girl not boy-then this...voice has changed unbelievably well

[movie3891]

It's been more than half a year since your last video. Please post more!

[h5t6ca]

Are you OK?

[BoySnifferFart]

So some skin. Stick you ass out from time to time.

[sergeantyeti]

I like your style Ashley!

[MsExoticBliss]

Anyone talk to her? Ashley I miss you I was subbed to you on my other channel that I deleted. Where are you lady?

[TR000PA]

It is not called "being fake" it is called acting. Frankly, being able to perform in front of a camera is not a normal human trait. If a person is even aware that a camera is around and being aimed at them a person will act significantly different.

There might be personal issues with a person being aware that they are in fact acting, but in time you either get used to it or you just always endlessly feel awkward about it.

[lumberjack713]

I wanna see another update video!

[nnnuggets]

@Borxin12 dude...its a fucking MAN

[forwardmover]

I think that feminist stuff is a bunch of crap, but do support you in your being your real sexual self. "Greg" came to our reunion as "Gretchen". I bought her a drink, and told her it was cool with me. so, just go for it.

[pcman008]

You don't have any friends. You are such a miserable person. You waste your life making these stupid videos. Go suck some dick, ratface.

[yatchmen]

A painter, poet, musician all put some of themselves in thier work, so when you post your YouTube a part of who you are comes out. This is what people see and connect with, even myself. Even tho I don't kno u I still feel a connection. Oh by the way u don't wear a lot of make up, and ur still so cute.

[colourful66hair]

hey, i just watched all your videos in like 3 days, and i was going to send you an email bassicly saying thanks for making them, but i dont have your email cos i forgot which video you put it in haha but anyways, thanks for your blog, it was really interesting, although sometimes i didnt understand it because im really stupid, i was just wondering what was it that made you go for help, sometime i get some of the feeling you talked bout, though i am male, p.s im crap with words :D

[Borxin12]

you're really cute. Honestly

[Hyperlot]

Disabling Comments on your videos is cowardly on a moral and intellectual level and shows you have no faith in your own opinions. Even if the other people watching this video don't know what I'm referring to - you fucking do. You've disabled comments on your more touchy video and have no credibility. Who's fake now?

[rdmerrittusa]

Well Your a beautiful lady, I like your videos and truthfulness. Have a great day.

David.

Chat sometime if you want

[sickpuppy7406]

i think you are soo full of it. you can be authentic on youtube. when i make videos i dont script anything i just look at the camera and say what i have to say then end the vid. upload and done. i dont edit anything or write what i want to say. sometimes i ramble but hey thats me

[raaaaaul12]

how did you become so ugly!!>??

[darliegoddess]

What an ass.

[claytonplz]

"scripting your authenticity" thank you for finally putting that feeling into words for me.

[michzimmerman]

Nevertheless, you've handed out these cards publicly and people respond because they feel a connection. That's humanity and it's a beautiful thing, not fake. The feelings and opinions you've expressed have helped a lot of people feel better, less alone. Plenty of people script much more to help much less.

I'm proud of you and, while you may not know me or believe that I know anything about you, I have seen what you've wanted to show me and I'm proud.

[michzimmerman]

I think you're reading way too much into what it means to make public any aspect of yourself. Whenever anyone creates anything for anyone, it is exactly what one wants to present. Say you cut out a heart from red cardboard for a Valentine's card and discard the non-heart-shaped red cardboard. It's not part of your card. It has a separate place, perhaps in the trash (short-term memory) or perhaps recycled for future use.

[DarthYuYevon]

Your confusing what actually being fake is, versus, being yourself in a short amount of time.

[NoahFuckingJay]

@SexyBbwMichelleLee You're* If you are going to insult someone, at least use correct grammar.

[Dirtslob1]

You know, I don't like you very much!

[Dirtslob1]

You have a worthless channel and i hate it!!!!

[moomintroll8]

How are you doing?

-phiz

[zionml]

LOL edd you rule!

[blowjobclinton]

are you a transvestite?

[edd77]

rape is just an enhanced seduction technique and should be legal

[Dollfan]

There's a big difference between "being fake", being inauthentic and being self aware. Yes the moment you know a camera is on you, the self awareness creeps in. That does not force you to be or act differently. It certainly doesn't require you to be something your not (fake). According to Carl Jung, at any moment we are all presenting the persona we want the world to see. Hidden is the shadow or the part we hide from the world. It doesn't make you fake, just human.

[NeverDreame]

It would just be kind of odd to be observed unintentionally.

[1258852]

Hey so your completely a woman now? As in you have female genitals instead of a male's too? I might have a few more questions, I don't really know much about trans-genders and gays. Ignorance is the cause of hatred, so if I must hate something I don't know, I might as well figure out all that I can.

[shotgun7]

I understand your point about unintentional fakeness, but I think that you are over thinking it a bit. I believe that where some people go wrong is trying to be too serious on YouTube. It is an outlet for practically limitless personal expression. Have fun with it. Try not to feel pressured by your subscribers to make videos all the time.

[TrannyWriterSG25]

so that like my on one networking site like tagged or myspace we put the pic the a feel the happiest at that is why I put myself out there on you tube.

[BarefootRadio]

I have felt in a rut lately about people smiling in my face and being nice when they don't mean it. I have difficulty with this kind of insincerity. I try not to be a fake to people. I don't think people are fake here, it's a manifestation of that person in an environment. People behave a certain way, and that's them. Is it fake? Idk, who knows? Of course it's different than real life. Give people a chance. Sometimes they start fake b/c that's life and then they open up.

[mas2265]

Do you think you can bypass this problem by presenting your ideas on particular topics instead of trying to present your life in general? On the other hand, perhaps not being totally authentic shouldn't be something to worry about? Maybe we all are selective in how we present ourselves to others, whether online or in real life. We're not open books to our coworkers or even our friends--in the sense of, we don't speak whatever comes to mind. On the other hand, I haven't vlogged before, so...

[d3v4m0n]

Hey Ashley, glad to see another video of you. It's been so long since we've actually had the opportunity to see each other, that this is the only way I really get to keep up with you more often than not.

[LoveTheComedy]

hey Ashley. Its been a long time since I've seen one of your vids. Just wanted to say your voice really sounds great.

[tuhokas]

I have to say, for a starting anthropology student studying YouTube, this video was a fascinating one - thanks Ashley! As many others have pointed out, people do in a way create themselves through and while communicating with others. But the problem with the camera is that it is inhuman, and gives you no live feedback to react to. It doesn't interact back. I could think of more things, but i'm running out of space. I actually feel really tempted to make a video-reply right now :P

[DrawLove]

I kinda understand what you are trying to say but I don't see where there's a problem. making a video is a lot like writing a book in the sense that most of us don't write the same as we talk in real life. you wirte and you edit , and edit again.

maybe if you take the focus from yourself and place it on a something else (a greater cause) then who cares if other's don't see the "real" you in your videos. they will respond to your good intentions. know what I mean? hugs.

[ShpinxiLotus23]

omg i totally know what you mean. whenever i am recording myself the vibes are way different from when i'm not, even though im not trying to put on any kind of fake persona and every time i watch a recording of myself i end up not wanting to show it to people because its such an akward turtle of a situation having to talk to an inanimate object that projects you to the entire world to see if they want.

[itspaul70]

I suck at making YT videos, that's why I only made one, really bad one. :D

It's wierd talking to a camera. Do you look at the camera or look at the screen to make sure you don't look way too goofy.

Anyway, we only know what you tell us.

I'm jealous you got to meet P though. :P

[amginena]

Isn't everyone who puts on a smile when they don't feel like it, or bites their tongue when they're not having a good day being "fake"? We all put on a public persona. It's just part of the outside world wardrobe... Is that necessarily bad - that we behave well for one another? I have no illusions that I really know anyone. I still discover things about myself! At best, we can only know the facet someone presents. But that's a part. Even our public mask is something WE create.

[thegaymaker]

This is very very true. I actually took most of my videos down since I wasn't able to portray the essence of my real self. I'm going to start over again

[VanessaMarie14]

This is true I mean I know trying to be a girl even though you know your one on the inside can get to you because your real personality and the face you want to put to the world can clash because when you are transitioning we tend to alter our personalitys to what every one else wants us to be and in effect we loose our authenticity.

[AngelMarie1976]

Some great points and perspectives brought to light, indeed. By responding, though, aren't we feeding into that very partial persona or vlog avatar that you're creating for us? Is this video, perhaps, like active devil's advocation on behalf of yourself? When I present a video, only done a few so far, I've tried to be both authentic, and perhaps purposefully overtly expressive because I've spent so long in hiding, I've a need to now.. but that goes along with TS folk finding themselves I suppose

[GinnyRamone]

P.S. I didn't see the link to the video you're making a response to. =\

[GinnyRamone]

it's true. the moment one tries to be all honest and themselves, it does affect the outcome in all the ways you mention, and become a character.

But I wonder if the key might be to intentionally become a character a la Stephen Colbert. Basically, anything where you talk about issues as yourself ultimately makes you have almost a split personality: There's Ginny (or Ashley lol), the video blogger and Ginny/Ashley of real life, if any of that makes any sense =)

[SomethingStellar]

I agree, it is draining.

For me, my video shows a very small part of my videos. Like, I've recieved comments from people saying I'm so perceptive etc, but the part of me thats missing tends to be the part that jokes around and laughs a lot and says dirty things, because its just a part of me I can't seem to turn on infront of the camera haha.

[johnsmithingtons]

I see what you're saying. It's almost like you never get past the "introduction stage" of meeting someone. All they know is what you are telling them. They are never really hanging out with you and seeing your character.

[johnsmithingtons]

Though on the same hand you might be surprised at what we perceive of you that you don't realise that you are putting out that is true to who you are.

[femstarlight]

Fake isn't all bad, some people actually like me on-line which is more than I can say for most of my whole life off-line. I guess you could distill this theory into the notion that anything involving a camera is inauthentic.

[sparkleglow10]

oooh philosophical! love it!

[debutantebrawl]

It's so true. I'm, like, 300% more badass awesome in person. I just can't seem to record myself so completely.

Maybe it's how I smell? (Like the most badass awesome flower you've ever seen. Seriously, this flower would kick your ass, knock you down and steal your mom's purse.)

[JoaquinJack27]

This is the first response to anything on youtube that has really made me laugh. Thanks for making my day.

[rvbgeek]

I think that the jist of what your trying to say is that the act of making a video creates a 1 dimensional version of yourself, whereas to know you, people need to physically meet the 3 dimensional person that you are.

[Filifloats]

Ash- I get it-Youtube is essentially contrived. Even a photo isn't objective- the photographer chooses where to point the camera. And I know that it's easy to fall into the trap of thinking you "know" someone online. But... we "present" ALL the time...yet the way we do shows part of the true self- the wheat in the chaff. And our affection is real, if mostly uninformed. Fake or no I've been touched by you girls and that is real. I appreciate the struggle and still think of you all as friends

[somewhereNBtween]

this is deep... but so true.

SomewhereNBtween

[sbflash311]

Are you doing something different with your hair? It looks nice.

[tgmarla]

interesting...... i wonder if "filtered" would be a better word than "fake"?

Love your hair, BTW, very cute - I KNOW YOUR HAIR!!

~M~

[pigpen7471]

SO TRUE! 100% right on the head!

[479Lucy]

Just be as you as you can be. Darn the torpedoes and full speed ahead!

[Carwyn79]

I wouldn't say that the "me" on camera is fake. To some extend I am different when I'm filming myself or when I'm on stage as a singer. That isn't "faking" but more being able to express myself differently. I somehow dare to say or do things in these situations I normally wouldn't do.

As Erin already pointed out. It's more on of the many "ME"'s you have. Are you not authentic when you're behaving differently at work than you're behaving around your friends?

[tobyr3]

I agree with commenter DukeOfQueens who stated 'authenticty is a myth.' Ashley, all your vids are good. True, only a limited aspect of a person comes through on these vids. I appreciate you applying your philosophical interest to this particular vid.

[DukeOfQueens]

authenticity is a myth

[Rhonda577]

Welcome to Hollywood, and the technology of broadcasting yourself around the world.

[xTheAshleyMartinx]

Totally! Nailed it...agree with everything you said!

[whatisbeneath]

It's no surprise that you're going to be different in front of friends compared to being on video. As soon as you interact with someone, your behavior adapts. The way you interact with your own image is going to be different to the way you interact with a friend, which will be different to how you talk with your mother, which will be different to how you talk with a partner. That's natural. None of those versions of you are fake, they're just different aspects of your personality. So vlog away!

[NermalsChannel]

Emotionally, people don't know the difference between a real person and a recording. We hear a voice and see a person, so there's going to be some feeling of attachment and familiarity.

[soni408]

I know I don't know you but can't help but admire you. No pressure but I do.

[grishno]

It's not just youtube though... you're a different person depending on the person that you're hanging out with. 

when I am alone I am different than when I am with my wife, which is different than when I am on youtube or when I am hanging out with my friends.

Different social settings make for different behaviors. Does that mean that one is real and the others are fake? no, they're all just little bits of the larger "ME".

[sirspocksalot]

Spot on. Whenever you interact with others they're only getting a subset of the whole.

[nestorrfortuna]

very intelligent point.

that relates to celebrities

[meetshannon]

Hi,  I thought this was a very good video and,,,,, You look Great! Bye Sweetie *****Shannon*****

[blickblocks]

This is a really good post, you went in and talked about what's really at the heart of what I was feeling (but like usual don't verbalize!). Vlogging definitely is "emotionally draining." That's the perfect term for it. There's also the tug between narcissism and loneliness... at least for me. Thank you for posting!