Worst Joke Ever

[jdwizard99]

I want to mount you.

[FearlessChikn]

Well that was 4 mins and 29 secs I can't get back

[TheUselessCritic]

i actually laughed. respect.

[twistedgretchen]

"Maybe the Kraken floating around in the back there?"

LMFAO XDD

[GORDONCAMPBELL]

Lol, what just happened ?!? Lol

[shurdi3]

A man comes into a bar

oh wait that was a horse

so a man comes into a horse

[TheLaAussieWog]

why did i just watch this?

[Twinker98]

@TheLaAussieWog

i ask me the same!! xDD

[TheLaAussieWog]

HHA he picked the barracuda, eheeeee , eehheee , ow

[mackierer]

i got bored when i saw his face

[TheThirdSock]

I don't understand it, but I lol'd. I don't understand the hate on this video. The sound of your voice alone is entertaining. You have a nice voice.

[Tomjo108]

I wasted all my time watching this video and I don't get it.

[SniiperAssassin]

WOW

[SpinSpeach]

well, i understood everything but the punch line...

[xSheens]

Mild green hairy what? I don't get it. :[

[osumruss]

This is why we killed the brits in the rev. war...

[mrliampep5i]

@osumruss what

[IXOCrAiG0XI]

@osumruss what because someone posts a video on youtube ? Well you're intelligent.

[Mrnoobycow]

whats pink and fluffy = pink fluf whats blue and fluffy = pink fluff holdin its breath lolol

[girrox11]

wwhat that doesnt make any sence wow

[sophiadelphia]

what´s warm and smells like banana? a monkey´s fart :-) btw, that french accent sounds awfully wrong. it even sounds more like a german accent than like a french

[markstar777]

haahhahhhahhahahhhahahha you funny racist git

[bonecrusher8584]

is it even meant to make you laugh

[ITh98cool]

i got the worst: what did the cell phone say to the candy, you're an candy

[OMGzCookiez]

gay

[Israeloo1]

what was funny about that u ass wasted 4:28 seconds of my life fuck dont make any more videos ever

[TheYungSJWard]

What;s the point of this?

[stripperketchup]

I hate you.

[stripperketchup]

I hate you.

[madrabiddog]

Thumbs up if you didn't make it past 1:00

[Cshizzle94]

@madrabiddog Hell, I didn't even get past 0:26

[madrabiddog]

@Cshizzle94 HEY! Let's tell our worst jokes!

What's blue and smells like paint?

BLUE PAINT!!!

[fashpart]

TOO LONG, DID NOT LISTEN. 

[cpaterson6]

i would very much like to pound your head into the pavement till i see brain soup!

[timtimmytimmy]

.....thats so bad it's actually funny

[xMissBunniex]

LOVED IT! 

[uknwuwantme]

wana hear a corny but dirty joke?

..the corn fell in the mud!

[MasssiveDong]

waste of 4:28 of my life.

Thanks.

[RegenerationStorm]

I liked the story a lot =) the punchline should hae been longer, but i guess its perfect enough.

great joke! made me grin even though i didnt understand the punchline too well XD

[t3trojans]

FUCK OFF ALEX!

[mastererny]

ugly bastard.

[BinghamVlogs]

i want my life back!!!!!

[setunle]

One of the best I've heard for a long time. Much better than with the shark passing the squid to another saying "Here's the sick squid I owe you"

[pebble37lifter]

can someone the punchline. please and thank you

[elyssanz]

I actually got it... and thought it was kind of funny.

[hodankobold]

you look like living with your mama, having no friends and being gay

[ernestoamati666]

fuckin dieeeeeee

[HGRadetzki]

Hans as german as he may be...

Well thak you for admitting that even we Krauts have a heart! :D Cheers from the former hunnic empire!

[manxxx95]

idiots....why did u watch the whole vid if u didnt liked it .duhhhh

[elakihiro]

no offense frechy fries man but asl;kdj f;glskjdlk;sfagd;lkfsgkljg go eat some crap

[Loveshugochara1]

no there is a worse one: y was the fish afraid to get on the computer... it didn't want to get caught in the internet i know worse right it was from a clean joke book at a book store but still this joke sux hardcore

[sweetypic]

XD can i have the 4:28 min of my life back plssss

[eryck08]

kill yourself

[brocken0heart]

can i have my 4min and 28 secods of my life bk plz

[Leogriffen]

that was hilarious!

[Adastra14]

hahahahaha i loved it ! :D ....that WAS bad mind you! :P

[GambitTD]

i dont get it :D

[chiron1100]

@GambitTD but how can ya not? yeah i didnt get it either lol

[pinkyw101]

What a waste of time

[Ralphstricks]

i got a really bad one

whats brown and sticky...

a stick

[Marktreez]

or the punchline could be? this was the last joke that sent Kurt Cobain over the edge!!!! Im just lucky i too don't have a shot gun!!!!! sorry mate this has to be the most drawn out joke since bush got a second term!!! since bill gates said microsoft 7 would be the answer to our prayers! since you took an hour out of your life and 4.28 out of mine with this nonsence!!!! watch modern warfare 2 angry kid by me and then you will see a good video!!!

[vipvic]

yep... you're stupid...

[fujimooney]

fantastic joke.

[casualjacob]

i watched this to the end to see what the hell and the punchline is extremely retarded

[grimgor999]

I laughed at the french bit how hes like i cant kill anything i am french

[lachlanSB]

no offence but i now hate you

[MetroidFreak123]

:( stupid

[Pragmaticperson]

What a boring person i turned off before the end

[spiliph123]

I'd heard it with a slightly different mix of the words in the punch line, but that version wasn't funny either.

[therachaelbean]

Such an English John Green :D

[Azrepheal]

Thats a hell of a compliment, cheers! :D

[therachaelbean]

No problem :D

[wierasa]

thanks a lot for wasting 4:28 of my life you poop.

[Verhoeven1980]

bla bla bla bla... Was that a joke or a stupid story?!

[cafe1984]

that was shit.

[GustavoMorenoo]

wtf was this

[RandomCopier]

i'm french i cant kill anything XD, worth it for the accents.

[innerguardianXIII]

aaahhhh i get it, i think it is funny, but it was just a bit too long winded, still pretty funny lol :)

[Hansnsn36]

question... do you hate germans?? " germans can kill everything... he cant kill it as german he may be... " i mean W T F???

(but at least... im german and im butcher... no joke, but they are in all countrys!!)

[dwergenman]

I almost fell asleep watching this

[jmi199]

I did...

[gingertears]

i got bored at 1.50

[pancakeking23]

what i javes?

[Theelviskid123]

YOU sir are the most pathetic weakling with a sight mustachio on his face because your just a feeble weakling teenager with small hair over his ball sack i was watching porn last night i could have sworn that you were the small woman being fucked by the overweight Japanese man that's really all i have to say but never the less i will keep typing anyways you are a disgrace of the man you live in you living peace of shit i hope u die and end up on 1000 ways to die and they name west Philly willy

[leadhead69]

What?

[bibhuna]

you're mocking him? Mr I Like Watching Fat Japanese Men Having Sex?

[MissEmlehAppleh]

LMAO awesome xD

[Harvesterofpie]

Hahaha! It took awhile but it was worth it with all the jokes you threw in.

[Nouvai]

that is such british humor.

[ThePatr1]

so long i couldnt follow it

[2mari4u]

it's neither Hands nor Huns it's HANS!

H-A-N-S!

[iwantahat]

Hans goes back to "Johannes", so a Hans would be a John in England.

[newmesee]

i like it

[metalix666]

Haha got it but it was shit.

[Woffo]

When i first heard this joke it was awful..............it's still awfull! What's the best joke you've ever heard? I know you have one so tell it

[rutgers0809]

Not very funny!

[cgsmitherine3]

so u kno wht the vid is abut? well done!!

[TylerDUB2012]

i would have just killed it

i thought the squid wouldn't get killed and they would put him back in the tank and he would laugh or something

[ahdeath2007]

was#

[ahdeath2007]

i thought the joke would be that the french man would tell the german that it i jewish squid then he could kill it

[cgsmitherine3]

he should of said that it was rhabbi

[KnockoffNigeI]

Hands that do dishes...

[p455W0rds]

Umm...its not "Hands"

Its Huns. I think.

Because in the 1930s-40s an 'inner circle' joke in the British or American or Both (I'm not sure which) was that they called the Germans 'The Huns' which was actually very demeaning and rude but it was common to hear people laugh(besides Germans of course) whenever a sadistic joke or a disgusting joke about them was told referring to them as 'The Huns'. So, I didn't get the joke either but what made me laugh was when the French guy said "Huns can kill.."

[KnockoffNigeI]

"Hands that do dishes can feel soft as your face,. With mild green Fairy Liquid!" was a slogan from a Fairy washing liquid ad campaign from the 60's, 70's and 80's in Britain.

The joke here is that the punch line: "Hans that does dishes can be soft as Gervais with mild green hairy lip squid" sounds a bit like that slogan.

By the way 'Hun' as synonym for German had almost disappeared in Britain by the 1930's it having a negative association with the first world war.

[xSheens]

@KnockoffNigeI Ah, marvelous, at least I get it now!

[abid1995]

i did not get the joke

[iluvbeerlotz]

jesus thats bad, never saw a green squid either. dont give your day job, if you have one.

[jibbajon]

I worked the punch line out at 3.44.

[hammyad]

right..... i give us english people a bad name

[CharleyandAlex]

I dont know about the joke lyk but... Its the worst face ever !!

[ISLAM4THICKONES]

errrrr yehhhhh

[brokennarcissist]

Meh, I've told worst

[mamaluiginumber1]

lol this joke is hardly even a joke XD

[LilySchmidt]

You're french man has an italian accent!

[LilySchmidt]

Your...shouldn't write in a hurry...

[OMGyoumakemewannaLOL]

You remind me of a british Hank Green, why?

[Azrepheal]

What a wonderful compliment ^^

[OMGyoumakemewannaLOL]

Lolz! Just earned a new subscriber

[LizzieLovesDeclan]

lol, that actually was funny to me, coz i'm blonde. xx

[xavieragummochy]

wtf worst joke

[KimberlyRocks101]

i didnt laugh

[tightshorts3]

I enjoyed your inimitable tongue-in-cheek style and you were able to purvey delight from beginning to end. whimsical and wonderful - viva alex!

[Tassidus]

abi says: take ur shirt off!!!! iv heard stories aboput ur war scars and tatoos!! (:

[grumpychuck]

GREAT!!!

[imperfectmelodies]

sheesh

[TobyandDean]

Jeeezus. Took me 30 seconds, but I got it in the end. I shall use this to annoy someone..

[johnzsinferno]

not very funny but lol!

[nerimon]

I've heard this before xD

[Elrich89]

I...I don't get it!

*ponders*

[thegadgetdude]

Took a while but we got there in the end, i got it.

[MyShowbizName]

I just got it

[FroGhandi]

haha, you are pretty funny Alex.

[DJE179]

That was awesome you are quite the comedian

[TheBorzoi]

Why am I laughing so much?

[PurePhoenix]

Totally agree with CowInParachute, now *that's* timing!

[CowInParachute]

that joke's well getting stolen.

incidentally, the pause between the awful punchline and the "fuck off alex" was near perfection.

[veebeeseesyou]

That was amazing.

I laughed so bloody hard.

You saw it.

(Large Hardon Collider xD)

[MusicFromBlueSkies]

Even having read the description I definitely did not see that coming.

I'm not sure why but I am quite angry at you, and well as being in awe obviously.

[johncox88]

But you haven't got red hands mummy!

[PinkEarth88]

i want to kiss you.....