11 Phrases MEN Use (a counterpoint to 9 Phrases Women Use) - original version

[zoidsmaniac]

The only ones I'm guilty of are #1 and #7 (although it wasn't for sports). XD

[tigger7740]

Yeah...At least the Man proved these phrase. I sometime wish Men could go back to their mother's wombs. POWER TO WOMEN.

[xXBurningDesire]

@tigger7740 It's because of man you even exist. Go back to you fathers nut sack. 

[tigger7740]

@xXBurningDesire :..Oh stfu!...I came from a woman not a man.

[xXBurningDesire]

@tigger7740 In you call yourself a lady :P you know damn well you where swimming in balls hun

[tigger7740]

@xXBurningDesire: Where did i call myself a "Lady"? And no I don't swim in balls.

[xXBurningDesire]

@tigger7740 Your icon suggest that you're a lady, and I was joking with you. 

[tigger7740]

@xXBurningDesire : OK:)...can i say hugs?!

[xXBurningDesire]

@tigger7740 If I say yeah will you send me some nude pics?

[blutsturmer]

Notice all these are a way for a man to avoid getting BITCHED at! If men were to say what is appropriate to the situation it would be an opportunity for her to complain and whine like this bitch does the entire video. Most women just fuss and belittle to make themselves seem and feel superior. For all further issues refer to 'wmabtw'.

[missjennyfleur]

The woman's version was way better.. Step it up ladies...

[MrMarbleson]

# 9 wasn't even close

[udxassag]

It's so less amuzing and universal than the original 9 phrases film!

[johnyprestige]

this is weak.

[RaspberrySeason]

this is SO TRUE!!! buahahaha... especially the "Have you made this yourself" hahah

[RobT89]

HAHAHA mhmmm was right on the dot.

[didyouseethatshit777]

wow im glad that women missunderstand men as bad as we misunderstand them.

Is there a way to have a kid without women? they get so angry and assume such strange things about meaningless things

[icedanilzation]

I'm a little surprised that you got most of those wrong, especially considering I think you have men actually tell you what they would be thinking. Instead most of the answers are what women are thinking. The first one for example "What!?!" is NOT "Oh crap I've been caught doing something wrong", it's "What's the fucking big deal?" I'd be happy to let you know the real answers to the rest if you want.

[Belle268]

Lol... I agree...

[xxxBl00dyDr3ams]

#6 is the biggest lie men have ever come up with

[kitsunefoxfyre]

32 men watched this video

[scamon01]

@kitsunefoxfyre sweeeet!

[turdbuckle]

i like 10

[xsushx]

i luv this vid too...

but more than that I love some of your replies :P

[CosmicVenom]

funny how i dont give a fuck

[DarkDaniAngel]

You can't tell me to go back to the kitchen cause I can't cook ha ha ha...

[ManSpeakOut]

Funny on how both videos of men's and women's phrases dive into male blame and male bashing in each scene.

[scamon01]

@ManSpeakOut Even funnier that these were made by men. Considering your page highlights videos criticizing the enforcement of domestic violence laws and gender equality, you may not be an authority on this.

[cole3454657]

this video=retarded

[LebPuppy]

@cole3454657 So was the one about women.

[cole3454657]

@LebPuppy i agree

[HiFiGuy197]

I would just like to point out that the last two minutes of a football or basketball game can take half an hour. It's not our fault.

[Hakudohshi]

@HiFiGuy197 So true... "HEY JIM LET'S REPLAY THE LAST TOUCHDOWN TWENTY TIMES BEFORE WE MOVE ON TO THE END OF THE GAME!"

[rgdsa653er]

#1 What!?

Real translation:

I didn't actually do anything wrong, and we both know it. I do realize you made a rule against drinking out of the milk carton (leaving the toilet seat up, etc), because of your need to passive-aggressively control me. In reality, what I did causes no harm to anyone, so I'm still going to do it.

[rgdsa653er]

#2 Which one do you like?

Real translation:

This trivial decision does not matter to me. Your fashion accessories only make a difference in your own mind. You're the only one who would care to argue about them. You could wear a burlap sack, and after a few beers I'm still going to have sex with you.

[rgdsa653er]

#3 Did you make this yourself?

Real translation:

I have come to understand that your fragile self-esteem depends on your ability to cook food, and that you take the reaction of my taste buds as a personal insult. Therefore, out of a misplaced sense of consideration for your feelings, I will attempt to avoid negative remarks about your culinary complex.

[HOODYWOODRECORDS]

@rgdsa653er FUCKING BRILLIANT HAHAHAHAAHHAH!!!!!

[rgdsa653er]

#4 I'll call you.

Real translation:

I'll call you when and if the benefit of having sex with you exceeds the cost of dating you. As time passes, sex with you starts to look better, and dating you starts to look less excruciating. Both are illusions.

[rgdsa653er]

#5 Can you get me a beer?

Real translation:

Seeing as I pay for the beer, the food, the TV, the clothes, the car, and the house, and seeing as I spend all day hard at work to earn said pay, and seeing as you spend all day at home occasionally cooking and doing laundry... can you get me a beer?

[rgdsa653er]

#6 I know exactly where we are.

Real translation:

We are so lost.

[HOODYWOODRECORDS]

@rgdsa653er HAHAHA

[rgdsa653er]

#7 Two minutes.

Real translation:

Two minutes after we arrive, no one will care how late we were. So cool your jets, and let me finish watching the game.

[rgdsa653er]

#8 Mm Hmmmm

Real translation:

What you said is inconsequential. I may not have been listening, but the odds are in my favor.

[rgdsa653er]

#9 It's not as bad as it looks.

It's exactly as bad as it looks, no better, no worse. However, I have come to understand that you frequently overreact and blow things out of proportion, especially things with which you are not familiar. So from your point of view, it's not as bad as it looks.

[rgdsa653er]

#10 Burp

I am not ashamed of my natural bodily functions. In fact, like a picture, they can take the place of 1000 unnecessary words.

[rgdsa653er]

#11 It's okay... I know what I'm doing.

Real translation:

Sooner or later, someone will have to solve this problem. Chances are, it will be a man. Chances are, when he first started out, he didn't know what he was doing either. But he took ownership of the problem and kept working at it, until he figured out how to solve it. I may not be the man who will solve this particular problem. But I will be a man.

[HOODYWOODRECORDS]

@rgdsa653er This one is my favorite:-)

[rgdsa653er]

can I answer?

[scamon01]

@rgdsa653er

wow, you really put some thought into this.

[owendagangsta]

these phrases are soo true XD and im a men myself :P

[sniper947]

#12: "Stop your damn bitching, and go make me a sandwich."

This means that this announcer is a complete douche bag by thinking we actually give a shit what she says, and she should go to the kitchen where she belongs.

[ANDREW26101]

LIKE WOMEN DONT HAVE FAULTS GIVE ME A BREAK SOME OF THIS IS BULLSHIT THOUGH LOL BUT FUNNY

[ANDREW26101]

HAHAHA NUMBER #2 IS RIGHT I DO THAT LOL

[fromuaewithlove]

bullsh*t ))

[Oicurmtoyoy]

If this weren't a response, I'd be trolin' right now.

[chrixthegreat]

Some of them are accurate, most aren't

[crazysim9]

shut up and get back in the kitchen

[CmonPlay123]

Its a creative film, with a point. I like it, but I don`t agree completely.

[aacheronn]

this was great! and for the other guys, who cares? its just a joke video using common everyday examples. its true btw my dad and brothers are just like this!

[Kitorimatsu]

that's soooo true!!

[CrnookiVuk]

The reason much negative comments you get Scamon01 is that because in video Response "9 Phrases Women Use: (aka ~ 9 words women use) - original version" , you have there stereotype view of all women situation on a pretty much daily bases , but said in that manner showing women habit when they are wrong and right.

You just flame people around with arrogance . Nothing more.

[MomoNoHanna]

i have one word for this LAME!!!

[johnnyoflynn]

Not bad try, but most of the "man phrases" are just us being considerate as to not offend your crazy time-bomb like sensibilities.

[darkkiyasha]

This video stinks. We already ALL knew all this. -_-

[jimmihshs]

this would be funnier if it wasnt so stereotypically wrong.

[kaleri]

GET ME A BEER BITCH!

[scamon01]

you've taught your female dog to retrieve you a beer? that's awesome.

[kaleri]

hell yeah!

[PnutButterNbicheZ]

watch out lady your sexist is showing! lmao!:P ima MAN!!!!

[jimmihshs]

lulz

[Zeffrin101]

What?! means.. I know you have a problem with this but I don't so you're going to have to deal with it.

:)

[jaskirat1989]

not even half as good as "9 Phrases Women Use"...

[ManofManyPasswords]

haha, the mens phrases compared to the video with the 9 womens phrases, the mens' are so much more caring and considerate, whereas the womens' are controlling, manipulative, and bitter.

[kickbootykids]

It was the same thing as the "9 Phrases Women Use" except a guy version, they were on the same level of stupidity.

[hsd6553]

this was stupid

[wolfmanbakerman]

if you are going to take a stab at men at least be funny. boobs rule

[PirateKing1256]

It's because we see people as women and men. Why cant we treat each other as human? This kind of things create sexism.

I'm a guy and i'm not any like this in the video.

[MrMeanderthal]

if women are so good at communicating.. why do they need to use so many words??

[PirateKing1256]

Just a stereotype. Everyone is different so stop generalizing all men.

[scamon01]

"Everyone" is different? Sounds like a generalization to me...

[PirateKing1256]

Ok , not everyone is different and some are same and some are different and minority are same and majority are different. Solve the riddles.

[jea740]

@scamon01 This is true but meanly for the men who drank to much beer and there braincells got dmg by it like my father

[jea740]

@PirateKing1256 9 out the 11 things out of this video my father does its excatly him

[KTagMan]

Jeeze, you didn't even include "Pull My Finger!" What lousy writing. Must've been written by a women.

[afroman30]

yeah not all guys are like this

im not...

only thing i do is tha what!?!?! thing

[AXMIM]

Since he took the time to flush the toilet at the end, this must be true. Just joking, I wanted the make viewer reallize that there was no point in flushing the toilet....,

[brandonskywalker]

you have to look into what women are sayin. men are pretty straightfoward. women just look into a mans words deeper because they put so much into their own words and think things are really that complicated. i dont know about most men but i always mean what i say. its just easier to be straightforward and honest in relationships.

the problem is being realistic and straightforward isnt what women want 9x out of 10 it turns into a big deal because i was being honest and said the WRONG THING.

[AXMIM]

Totally true

[brandonskywalker]

its pretty sad that its true to cause its such a little thing that if just that aspect was changed, things would be way less complicated.

[Picopunk3]

This is bullshit.

[scamon01]

You're being too hard on yourself.  Try again.

[arcanist9]

#8 is my favorite.

[JSparkleZ2]

9 phrases was much better...

This applies to a good number of guys but not all...

All women are guilty of the 9...

[AXMIM]

I Agree

[dovie2blue]

These are always in response to the woman's statements so they are not as funny.

[DenHeart]

"what!?" was true

"unn.. hmm" was true..

rest dont apply to me lol

[FiShY1739]

same goes to me

*high five =)

[optimistsRUS]

9 phrases were more funny (I'm a man) .

I think that's part of thereason why this one has only got 25k views compared to 669k on 9 phrases women use.

[THEetsybay]

Mm-hmm...

[lvonthebrain]

Here's one more: LISA V IS THE GREATEST!!!!!

[guevaramatthew]

HAHAHA!!! sadly this is true!

[KISSMYASSEVERY1]

Wmoen are dumb impatient and dont know the difference between a boy or man!

[scamon01]

has anyone else notice the way the above comment writer spelled "women".

hmmm, who needs the dictionary?

[AneesaColeman101]

same thing i was thinking, lol!

[thegamermiguel]

wow you know this leads to the conclusion that all men are alike............... which is not true but ofcourse you will denie it and come up with a contridiction of which you will asume i am like other men and will not understand.......... but if all men are equal then that means i will dominate the world like napoleon, or conquor Europe like hitler, or even die a death that will live in everyones minds like leonidas I. with this i conclude you have to idea what you are talking about, good day.

[AneesaColeman101]

hm.... Wmoen are dumb?

Well, i don't know what "Wmoen" is

[Oravenz]

Are you not clever enough to figure out what a word is when there are simply two letters transposed?

[AneesaColeman101]

Are you not clever enough to figure out i was just joking? :'D

[scamon01]

can't we all just get along?

[AneesaColeman101]

but.... there's just no fun in that....

[IamCorgidan]

uh huh

[virtuastudios]

it got a bit predictable by the end, but its pretty good.

[markz15]

the burp one is 100% true lol

[nodirrrrr]

aha hm...?!?

[abby922]

you lose. the women's phrases were much funnier

[joshua61991]

it was funny though

[deepfreezevideo]

Again well done.

Two thumbs up.

[scamon01]

thanks.

[SoldierAlexandra]

ahahahah!!!!!lol!!!!it's true:)))))

[agentdisembodiedhead]

idk.. i use all of the ones in the women video.. and my boyfriend uses all of these.. i think it's just amusing.. *shrug*

[jstanl]

Uh, we have safe answers because you all look for the smallest thing to have an argument about--so you can justify being mad at us because you're seeing another man.

[zybren39]

Mostly we dunno what we are doing..

so we cant blame others for spotting our mistakes..

but yeah mokshjuneja is right..

dont generalise

[elmntx32]

The beer one made no sense

[jollyrancher3232]

It basically means that men sometimes ask you to get something, when they SEE that you are busy and doing something at the moment. Usually which means, I know you are doing something but i still want my beer, and the beer is more important than helping you out or not disturbing you doing whatever you are doing. Mostly done to annoy, I guess?

[DeusExKiran]

I like how this video is rated lower than the "9 things women blah blah" one.

[kleishy2k]

mostly true but not all, my man drives me mental with the 2 minutes thing except he says in a minute and it's more like 2 hours later

[HipHopJun]

next time he does that, enjoy the game with him. lol theres no way we ever miss an important game.

[blizzardmaster88]

The one about women was fun.  This one is just mean

[xxDarkAwpxx]

a bit harsh but mostly true.

[soulshaker1]

umm well why do hate men so much :)

[nnshkiw1]

if this was suppose to be humorous

it did not succeed

[mokshjuneja]

how could you genralise???

[Seflioinna]

That's what my dad do ...exactly !

[SpaceTravellerTalks]

How true! This is great!

[upnampd]

Excellent humor - and too true. All my friends enjoyed this, thanku

[Alan01]

Yes, but most of these are just attempts to prevent the woman from going crazy.

[SoCoandCoke]

Exactly. (Except for the burp).

[PitbullChick19]

That is so true Lol

[XmarkedSpot]

this is quite sad... what if women really DO believe this? U say just anything and they think to understand, thus to get mad or worse... in fact, there isnt anything worse

[ZorkFox]

I must know different men and women than other people, because no one I know would use any of these. :)

[tsukiyoru19]

lol wow these are true too. i use almost all the 9 phrases that women use and now that i think about it, every guy i know, boyfriend, friend, dad, uncle, etc, uses these phrases every day

[theresident]

haha, very cute!

[emahn4]

Oh yeah, baby. Oh yeah.

[lgroche]

Soooo funny!  Thanks!

[adinglemeyer]

Wow... this is really funny! nice job.

[DhiscoStu]

TV > housework, naturally

and I do the "2 minutes" thing all the time :P