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From: 7bunyip
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  • When he does an English accent he sounds a bit like Mick Jagger lol

  • balaux try london,birmingham or bristol if the uk was the size of america crime would be triple to that fact!

  • @astronomical888 - got the stats to back that statement up? - didn't think so!

  • This is hilarious but also clearly written before the 90's. It's as tough here but because we're not retarded we did not legalize guns and make them so easy to get that normal 15 year delinquents become lethal killers. If it wasn't for legal guns the US would be safer.

    Still bloody hilarious though :)

  • Yes Bill. Take ONE article out of ONE newspaper that mentions the word hooligans. Then go on about how silly we are for having a supposed lower crime rate. Anything for a cheap laugh...... !

  • Yes, RIP England!

  • Let me clarify - Im British, bill hicks wouldn't come to the conclusion that the British don't have murders, rapes etc.. In America its legal to carry a weapon, all cops carry weapons this means that there's a far greater opportunity to commit these crimes because of the accessibility of guns! He was trivializing the British crime rate through the use of "Jokes!" as hes a "Comedian" the UK is far more safer than the USA! You Shouldn't Be Pissed Off Its A Good Thing!......

  • Well if thats all you Yanks can come up with no fucking wonder you were beaten by a panel of CHIMPS on a QUIZ show....now thats FUNNY LOL LOL LOL OLO LOL OLO LOL OLO LOL LOL OL OL OL OL O LO

  • verwood was on the top 10 list of dont go on halloween 4 riot cars 2 armed police 3 normal cops 2 ambulances and 4 paramedics that was just 1 night

  • Okay America...We'll let you have THIS one.

  • HA HA HA! It's funny because we actually have a HIGHER crime rate in England ha ha ha!

  • @swordhunter12 No we don't have a higher crime than the US! This is wish thinking for morons who think a higher crime rate makes for a more exciting country. Yeah right, unless you happen to be on the receiving end of it!

  • @stpb123ify FYI I don't think a higher crime rate makes for a more exciting country if that's what you were implying. I think having a higher crime rate sucks and as such my comment was actually taking umbrage with Hicks' claims. As for who's crime rate is higher I've heard several claims that violent crime in the UK is overall higher than that of America's

  • @swordhunter12 I wasn't directing it at you; I was directing it more at the cretins in my country who continue to convince themselves and others that this is the case.I've lived in America and while i was not a victim of crime, I watched the news and could tell that American cities had far more murders than UK cities and that overall parts of US cities were far more dangerous.and crime ridden then our own. These outlandish claims come from wanna be gangsters.

  • what a douche

  • It is not big or clever to try and be hard by association. No one cares whether your country or city is rougher or has more crime than somewhere else. Any idiot can kill with a knife or a gun. Faced with that situation every single person posting here would fucking brick it. That being said, the picture painted here is false. I'm sure if Mr Hicks had actually run into some footie fans in the 80s, his outlook would have been very different.

  • This is the only time i've heard something from Bill Hicks that i haven't liked. He talks about front page news in england and surely back then that would have been football hooliganism. But tbh in my opinion back then football violence was not that bad a thing as not many innocent people got caught up as it was just for a laugh back then where as these days quite often you get 15 year olds thinking their on the set of green street hitting someone cos they've got a different teams shirt on.

  • @millwalllboy9 I think your memory must be clouded. Hooliganism was dreadful and caught many innocent people up through 70's-early 90's - the firm's fights were pre-ordained (Bushwackers vs ICF). Milwall was one of the worst offenders. If you supported football there were some places/pubs u dare not go. It was known as the 'English Disease' abroad and caused deaths, injuries and in some cases riots. There's no doubt it is much better now than is used to be.

  • @Kiki53754 I know it was a very bad problem back then but what i meant was that back then people didn't go out looking to stab an innocent person. Most people were out to have a laugh, watch the football and maybe have a punch up. These days whenever there's a major incident at football it usually results in an innocent person getting beaten up or worse. In 2009 a Millwall fan was stabbed in front of his 2 sons by west ham fans.

  • When this was recorded crime in england was nothing compared to crime in america but these days there's not much difference other than the gun crime. Mainly because of all these chavs running about looting and the fact a lot of young people don't have any respect. 3 weeks ago a friend of mine had a knife pulled out on him just because some little scum bag wanted his phone. Back in the 80's that would be something rare but unfortunately these days its quite common.

  • Well irish drug lords, beheaded 4 people in dublin the other week. However because that would be to shocking to find out on the streets(as dublin is a very tense place between certain religious and political groups it could end up being blamed on terrorists etc) USA only have bad crime because of Gun legalisation and mexicans drug lord peeps.

  • should civillians cary firearms?

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  • To the people saying Bill Hicks was ignorant about the UK, the performed her any times and was massive here before anyone in the US took any notice real of him, he used to sell out arenas here like the big names of UK comedy do now. He actually considered moving to the UK and recorded a pilot for a chat chow for channel 4 (A major UK TV channel for those who dont know)

  • As an Brit I can say, at the time this was recorded British crime was nothing compared to american crime, but today.... We would be happy to have the dutsbin tippers back. I think the London/national riots say it all really.

  • im english and pretty much find everything he says funny 

  • I'm from the UK and like most people here, can laugh at myself. This is hilarious. Crime is definitely horrible here, but it sounds like it is a lot worse in the USA. Plus Bill is just taking the piss. Everyone should stop being so defensive...

    As Bill says, with a tongue firmly in cheek... "Speak English!"

    

  • I've been to Shaftesbury and it is a warzone sir! Dustbins and O.A.P's run those streets. Its a bloodbath of broken zimmerframes and burnt out plastic recycling bins every damn night.

  • @HarrisonRocks Shaftsbury is hell for the binmen. And all those hooligans!

  • lol love to see the bloods against the football rioters in the 80's

  • bill must have missed the bullitin about hoolagans when on a saturday you would see 6000 -7000 hoolagans role out of football terreces and leave towns in tatters

  • Bill hicks.

  • asds

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  • the crimes are a bit more severe than that in the UK- theres murders, rape, riots, robbery and no areas are "safe" anymore. Murders, thefts and attacks have happened down the street from me even in the countryside. You don;t have to be in the main city to witness any crime.

  • I live in Neverland and it's a fucking hell.

  • I think it's hilarious how everybody rushes to say how shitty where they live is. It's like a friggin' competition, like you want to live in a craphole.

  • LOL maybe if you just visited South kensington or a very upmarket part of london you would think that it is a cosy little island, but just see the rest of the city, let alone the rest of the u.k, and you will see that its not the case. Every western nation and big city has problems like crime deprivation. Still much love goes to bill hicks.

  • For those of us out in countryside it is virtually crime free; other than a few thefts of farm equipment, Ha ha ha! I can so relate to Bill Hicks, he's spot on with his observation.

  • Think he got his classes mixed up a little here ;p

  • Hmmm... I dunno when this was from but there obviously is crime all over the country but in certain areas. FUCK ME. You don't even wanna go there get alone live there

  • People comparing need to keep in mind that although we do have some pretty fucked places we aren't on the same wavelength as the americans over there they sell guns over the counter. On the most part i'd say people who claim it's really here bad are the same that surrender into news headlines to easily, crime just follows poverty and poverty is caused by banks and governments.

  • Yeah, the UK has some medieval crime on the streets. A bunch of LA gang-banging floppylip rappers wouldn't last two minutes at a hooligan riddled football match (soccer to you Americans LOL). Love Bill, he's crazy funny!

  • America was formed by English puritans that wanted to form a society that was free of the corruption and debauchery, but I agree that American crime is worse. I'm pretty sure that Bill understood this, but nevertheless, this routine is fucking brilliant. You don't have to take apart everything when the thing you're critiquing is comedy :L. It's a joke. So laugh, or just go and watch some actual political commentators and argue with those crazies. Leave this alone.

  • @joshuasheward Free off corruption and debauchery but willing to exterminate natives. I dont think Bill's primary motive was to be a clown he actually incites perspective thikning which opens room for discussion. Bill is more conscience than comedian.

  • Looks like the Hooligans have become Ruffians now.

  • Bill Hicks was exaggerating for effect-- THAT is his trade. He also made it a point to explain that UK crime is not a patch on US crime -which is a fact ''I am sure it's a serious thing(re hooligans)'' you all need to 'stop your internal dialogue' ''hooligans V The Bloods'' etc...

  • Sub-human scum in Britain, no idea of the term 'morality', craving for destruction and feeding off of suffering. And our government does almost bugger all to help.

  • @WiiStation360Games I thought you were talking 'about' our UK government there for a second LOL. No morals, feeding off suffering, craving destruction...yep....thats parliament alright. Bunch of cnuts.

  • I don't know why I bother talking to people who open up with 'dick' and 'retard' as a way of emphasising the fact that they have a small penis. Surprised that such people are actually BH fans at all.

  • 29 english people cant take a joke

  • Adverts on a Bill Hicks video... ironic.

  • "It sounds stoopid dudnt it?" ... Riiiiiiight O_o

  • it's when you put a cat in the bin, that's when it gets nasty British style

  • If I could choose anywhere to die, it'd be that drizzle dreary island with it's pasty rainstained populace, one look at them and u realize 'the transition from live to death would not be noticeable. But while I'm alive soooooooo glad I left for NY city. All together now USA USA - repeat until hilly billy (of english sheep shagging stock) jumps on stage.

  • BH was a very very funny and clever man, but was off-beam about some things. There are plently of very very nasty people in the UK with knives, guns & there is organised crime a-plenty. Spend time in the wrong areas and there are some pretty grotty places you don't want to visit then you can guarantee you will find trouble. The UK was not the comparitively cosy, safe place it seems when you just visit the nice parts, even in the 90s.

  • @dutchgoing Brixton has been under Section 30 for 6 months, giving police power to disperse & curfew after 9pm young people 'likely to cause alarm'.

    Most people simply have no idea what goes on in this country.

  • @dutchgoing Hey retard, he was well aware that there was plenty of crime in the UK at that time, this was just some light humour in his act, he was not 'off-beam'; this is comedy.

    I also cannot fathom how you are somehow offended that the rest of the world perceives the UK as a reasonably safe country compared to the US as if that is somehow an insult to your people.

  • @PrivateJoker17 Yo retard, why do you think he was offended? Sounds like he just disagrees with the view portrayed in this bit.

  • @bollwoven I already explained why this was not in fact Bill's view.

  • @PrivateJoker17 That's why I said the 'view portrayed'. That's twice you have failed to comprehend what someone has written. I suggest you improve your reading skills and general intelligence.

  • @PrivateJoker17 Yes I am aware of the irony he was using. I'm not offended and I'm not a retard thanks. The presumption that the UK is a very very safe place compared to the USA is probably correct but people from the USA do get it ever so slightly 'wrong' in a way I could only discuss with somebody from the UK. Hicks doesn't quite understand UK culture and neither do you seeing as you live 10K miles away in Australia, do you still need a conviction to live there btw?

  • @dutchgoing I was quite happy with your response until that final question; let me answer that in detail, first I live in a state that had no convict settlement, second the convicts sent to Australia made up less than five percent of the population at the time, third, Australia was settled by free settlers not convicts, fourth, the convicts sent here were not procreating whatsoever as they were in prison, fifth, most were political prisoners, lastly, my family is from England.

  • @PrivateJoker17 I said that BH had the emphasis a little wrong. It seems I'm not allowed to pull your leg a bit though. Aus does have the British to blame for most of Aus history I suppose. Sheer deluded revisionist fantasy that the convicts never ever procreated. You should be very proud of people who were wrongly transported for very trivial and unjust offences & took part in building a new country. Very negative that you should deny their contribution like that. I am very surprised by that.

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  • @dutchgoing I think compared to the USA in the 90's he had a point, definately not true now though. And I didn't live in the 90's so maybe I'm talking out of turn.

  • @destroysubgenres If you get mugged or murdered in the US or UK, it's still a mugging or a murder. A student from India was shot in the head for no reason at Xmas in Manchester, the guy who did it gave his name as 'Psycho' in court. This set is irksome because most visitors might just see the centre of London which is very safe and not the inner city. Hicks has us at one another's throats about who has the worst crime. The description of the UK as a cosy little island is for what purpose?

  • @dutchgoing I live in the U.K, but the U.S is a bigger country, I know crimes bad here now but I was just suggesting in my ignorance that maybe it wasn't as bad when Bill said this. Peace.

  • @destroysubgenres Well yes that's true almost for sure. When you think about it there are large parts of the US which are really under-populated too.

  • @dutchgoing And with that all taken into account it still isn't comparable to the states the gun problem in the UK is grossly over exaggerated I say this as someone who lives in one of them grotty areas as you put it. Knifes yes, guns not so much. Organised Crime - Thats the local dealer who specialises in cannabis not crystal meth he's not working for the bloody mafia

  • @keaney123321 All very true! I just think his choice of subject matter was odd really. Using the ignorance of his American audience to get laughs is peculiar for him when most of his comedy was about insight or exposing the banality of things which most people accept as normal. The fact is that the UK is not the quaint little island that most foreigners think it is. I don't see where the comedic device is in this set.

  • @dutchgoing americans think this is funny because we enjoy the english sterotypes. we are aware the uk is far different from such stereotypes but the idea of it itself is comical.

  • @howtokillawerewolf Ok but it kind of reinforces the notion that the rest of the world has of Americans being rather ignorant of the world outside of the USA. Be aware that the media has served up these stereotypes to you over and over, they are not actually part of any culture. Men like Hugh Grant do exist in the UK but they are just one type of person out of many types. BH shot wide with this set and reinforcing preconceptions wasn't usually his thing.

  • @dutchgoing "Ok but it kind of reinforces the notion that the rest of the world has of Americans being rather ignorant of the world outside of the USA" thats the same thing isnt it. obviously we arent all like what the world views us as...there are a wide variety of people here, all nationalities and races. we are not all fat, stupid, redneck warmongers...but people enjoy the comedy that comes from that notion. i enjoy comedy so the stereotypes dont bother me, just as it shouldnt bother you.

  • @howtokillawerewolf A very noticeable %age of people in the USA are very poorly educated about the outside world, just as very many people in the UK think that our tiny country is a place that the rest of the world pays much attention to, we are not Europeans but at the same time we are at the centre of things & not broke like some of our neighbours. Sheer delusion. I don't even recognise ther stereotypes BH represents here which is why it is a pretty bad comedy set.

  • @dutchgoing i must be a shining example of my country then, as i am quite worldly. i have met and conversed with people from the nordic areas, north and south ireland, scotland, poland and even some strongly sterotypical slags from london herself. and i will say that those from within london i met and partied with for more than a week...did not share the opinion of themselves you just mentioned. but as i said, theres all types there, as there are here. anyway, Hicks was, well... Hicks.

  • @howtokillawerewolf Ah yes you must have travelled if you know the context in which to use the world 'slaaaaag!!!'. I salute you sir, yes I do. We have a small island complex in the UK as I have described.

  • Football hooligans to be entirely honest, no guns of course, would completely fuck up the Bloods. All they do is beat the ever loving shit out of each other.

  • haha love you Bill

    even though your English accent's worse than Dick Van Dykes :)

  • @lustreboy Ha ha, I reckon he got it from spinal tap : )

  • people just like this because it's bill hicks and are ignoring that it's a fucking shit piece of comedy.

  • @thespread Man of the people, here. He speaks for us all. He knows everything about us, and knows the very deepest secrets of out hearts. He is a genius, and an expert in all forms of comedy, including the entire history of comedy. He knows what good comedy is. We should all listen to this man...

    Not really, you're a jackass.

  • @douchiemcfagballs OH MY GO I SAID SOMETHING THAT GOES AGAINST THE GRAIN YOU GUYS HAD BETTER FUCKING CRUCIFY ME.

    I love Bill, but this is not him at his best. The irony is, you're a schmuck unwilling to consider things from a different angle. If Bill Hicks were alive, he'd probably find you a loathsome small-minded little prick with a very apt username and call you out for being the spineless shit-swallowing jackass that you surely are. Peace.

  • @thespread "unwilling to consider things for a different angle". Considering comedy is a subjective media, your entire reply makes you look like an idiot. There is no good or bad comedy, because everyone likes different things. If you think it's bad, someone else might think it's the funniest thing ever. Neither is right or wrong, it's down to that person's sense of humour. The true irony is, if anyone is small-minded here, it's you. Also, Ad Hominem is never a good choice.

  • @douchiemcfagballs So many things wrong with your post, it's beyond the character limit to rebuke them all. I do find it funny that you take issue with the ad hominem attack though, since the ENTIRETY of your initial comment was in itself an ad hominem attack against me. Re-read it, then bask in the irony.

  • @thespread "the ENTIRETY of your initial comment was in itself an ad hominem attack against me" That was the joke, well done for catching it. I don't really understand how there were so many points wrong it goes beyond the character limit. There was 2 points. One point say that comedy was subjective, and the other was the ad hominem "point", which was a joke. It just seems like you can't refute my first point so you decided to go to argue the obviously wrong one. Well done. You're the best.

  • love u bill from england

  • Some places in Britain are admittedly scary, like anywhere, but it's not near the same level as America. You could walk through Moss Side in Manchester without so much as a second look, but walking through the projects in New York might be the last time anyone sees you alive. In the UK you can pretty much visit any countryside and be safe, but in America... well you've seen Deliverance right??

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  • @permedmammoth I might have missed something, but the last time I checked crime isn't something a country should be proud of lol

  • Bill would've been 50 today :(

  • @beirney82 God love him

  • @lustreboy He's my hero. 

  • Speaking as an englishman, I find this fucking hilarious.

  • This is fucking funny.

  • like to hear him say it to some (football) hooligans

  • As an Englishman, I wish this was true. Sadly though, it isn't. England, like the rest of the UK, is pretty much fucked beyond all recognition these days.

  • @jk2008jk He died in 1994......so perhaps a little out of date for things as now. Still funny though. :o)

  • @jk2008jk yea we have young hooligans worshiping AMERICAN gangster rap to thank for that!

  • @jk2008jk This was twenty yeas ago, plus he's just having a laugh ;D he did the same thing when talking about Australia.

  • @jk2008jk thats all of the western world my friend

  • @jk2008jk No, no. English crime pathetic. "careful, or ill cut ya blud"

    ...

  • @RedDwarffs It's not all like that, organised crime is rife in the UK. The quotes you have just said are the product of typical chavy cunts with no sense whatsoever.

  • @RedDwarffs No thats called petty crime, its in america as we'll. Organised crime is much larger in England like in america. CRIME IS PATHETIC IN THE WORLD IN GENERAL. Not England.

  • anyone know what song he was emulating?

  • @kaz287 Behind Blue Eyes - The Who

  • @hughh20 thankyou my dear friend

  • @kaz287 the who behind blue eyes

  • Yeah, considering how dead to the point Bill Hicks usually is, this is a really inaccurate and misguided.

  • Not funny

  • He was a comedien! Thats what they do! Im proud of being English but i dont see how taking the piss out of crime in England was insulting to the Ennglish? He took the piss out of everyone.

  • Personally I'm very thankful we don't have as much horrific crime in the UK. Not having a population that's free to buy firearms is pretty sweet.

  • Hahaha people from England are freaking out. He is talking about all the posh areas. Im From Liverpool (Its in england), crime is pretty rough and sometimes really bad. In fact they even have special type of police called the Matrix to target gangs and drugs dealers and what not. Yes Bill probably didn't visit the roughest parts of England but lets at least laugh at Bill taking the piss out of the rich posh dick heads :) Thanks Bill, Love ya!

  • I don't care about people bickering who has a tougher country. But if you look at the latest riots in the UK I think its quite clear there is a crime issue.

  • Disgusting how you guys are arguing over who has the better criminals ¬¬

  • america got gun crime.

    we've got knife crime

    oh, and chavs smashing up public property, real hardcore stuff

  • MY COUNTRY IS HARDER THAN YOURS!!

    Fucking idiots.

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  • @ianwilson2007 What the fuck?! You're apparently 43 and you're still having a prick waving competition about how 'hard' parts of England are. I thought you were some little 18 year old nonce judging by your comment. Get a fucking grip and grow up you pathetic clown. No wonder England is full of fucking assholes.

  • @ianwilson2007 bit harsh isn't it? only a bit of comedy mate, chill out!

  • yeh, low crime rates, that's a good reason to rip on a country

  • @bell191991 it's not that we have low crime rates, it's the kind of crimes that are committed. We might have isolated muggings and murders, but we'll never have anything close to America's level of gun violence and gang culture.

  • Gang violence against innocent people, particularly with guns, knives and mob handed-it's a black and brown t'ing.

  • Usually a very informed man, dont find this funny in the slightest since my mum and uncle were savagely attacked by football hooligans with stanley knives in the 90s

  • Take the little dicks that think they are the balls to the US and have them shot up by the bloods? yes please bill taa

  • @TheAlbatrossROSS He's dead

  • Not Bill at his most perceptive.

  • Bill Hicks was a genius because he could make anything funny. Some people seem to be taking him a bit too literally here. He's just making people laugh he's not saying it that literally.

  • Ha! I WISH crime in England was that nice....

    But he is talking about some posh twat telling him that haha.

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  • This is the best example of taking the piss out of your own country, by apparently mocking someone elses, that I've ever seen. I wonder how many of the audience were laughing about the English and how many were laughing about themselves though...interesting.

  • lmfaoooo

  • im from manchester... the fuck did he go to think england is safe? down south?

  • i love the fact that some of my countrymen have taken this as an insult to the quality of our crime

  • Not 1 person in the audience seemed to get that he was parodying a Who song.

  • crips v westham firm. im bettin on the westham firm tbh

  • 5 children a day shot dead in the USA, 4 children a year shot dead in the UK.

  • Lol, i love Bill, but he had obviously never visited the rougher parts of the UK.

  • @LemonPieLoL shut up you asshole

  • @echobears Youmadbro? A wannabe intellectual. I wasn't berating the comedian I was pointing out an inconsistency.

    I also see you like to abuse people. Is it because you are physically located 'out of reach'? That makes you a coward in my book, and probably Bill's book too. Kill yourself; hypocrite.

  • @LemonPieLoL in bill hicks wqords ; SHUDDUP. fucking niggerdick suck cock cunt wank shitty bastarding cunting dicklciking mofo crapeating turd burgling assghole loosening jackass

  • @echobears Ugh.. If you say so bro.

  • @LemonPieLoL

    It's possible. It's also possible that he's a comedian and he's trying to get a laugh.

  • @LemonPieLoL i think bill was refering to crime in quantity, in LA. Everything from race wars, mexican mafia, mexican gangs, korean gangs. I think he just pointed the bloods and crips as an example.There just seems to be more of it and more room for it.

  • @LemonPieLoL

    U have obviously never been to america. makes the Uk look like disneyland!

  • @thistleplace999

    your right american crime does make British crime look like disneyland, America is shit isn't it?

  • @thistleplace999 That is just arrogance at it's worst. Like every country we have our problems with crime. Like every country there are horrific murders on a regular basis. Like any country we have poverty. Like any country we have organised crime. You country might be bigger, have more people, but the crimes in any country are just as gruesome. It wasn't too long ago where a man in Glasgow was hacked into hundreds of pieces with a butcher's knife - now tell me that isn't horrific.

  • @LemonPieLoL He has been to the UK and felt that he really found his audience over there. But I agree there are some really bad parts over there as there is everywhere.

  • i have no doubt that if americans came up against english football hooligans they would run.....just like every other country has.....thier world famous.....apart from america

  • Man must learn to love one another uncoditionally... religion is a means to divide us all.

  • Bill was no dope he knows he is taking the piss out of an old hometown yankee imaginary view of England. 11 Hour flight his hometown was burning to the ground. H reads a stupid article about a dustbin lol.

    Everywhere in the world seemed safe simple and ridiculous after the London riots.

    London and LA have a lot in common!

  • @hundhun17 Nothing in common other than alot of rich twats and alot more poor twats thats it....oh and neil young