Some have a decent excuse for not listening to messages. I, for example have to spend an extortionate amount of time and money just to hear a message.
Hey David, I see you recorded a SoapBox message. I didn't listen to it though because I was too distracted by the room full of alphabet soup. What was it you wanted to say?
I'm only 22 but remember in my old house the phone has it's own little spot in the hall with a phone table, and he is right, if it rang we would run and answer it. Now most calls to the house phone get ignored unless it's a number we recognise
@fecto3210 Personally I only ignore the call if there's no calling number displayed at all. When I actually picked up incognito phone calls they were either silly "tricks" or people asking you out about loads of rubbish for some public opinion poll which I'm not interested in.
That's fine David, but if you start calling people in public and you raise your voice as you do in this video, don't be surprised if I punch you in the face.
Fact is, both mediums have their uses. Calls and texts are equally as important in a stupidly fast society, one to make quick responses, the other to organise complex and difficult arrangements. Though, I usually handle the latter in an email.
I fucking hate ringing people, and I hate even more when people ring me - I'd say that I simply refuse to answer (for a variety of reasons) at least 90% of the time. Just hate talking over the phone.
Which is slightly ironic, as my day job involves calling people up to do surveys...
My dad and I both dislike using the phone very much - I actually drove down to the mechanic to see if he could inspect my car that day because that option was, to me, easier than and preferable to calling him. (He couldn't. I drove back the next day and got it done then.)
ARGH I hate making or taking phone calls. It makes me incredibly nervous, sometimes even if it's a close friend. I also sound like an idiot because for some reason I just... slow down mentally and I have none of the time that I do with texts to check something or think up a reply. Besides that, I have never gotten a text from a person with the wrong number, but everyone I know has received a wrong number phone call.
My friends find it weird that I only use texts to say "Where are you" or "What time are we meeting" you know, things texts are meant for. They seem to enjoy telling me about how "Oh I send about 4000 texts a month to my girlfriend" well good for you, if that's the best part of a relationship I'll go and get chemically castrated tomorrow.
Thing is most people I know do use texts for somewhat trivial, ephemeral things like the "we are there" text. Actually, most people don't text me that much, so maybe it's just me....
I would assume that the preference regarding the choice of spoken/written telecommunication is pretty much a culture related issue. Coming from probably the world's most socially awkward country filled with introverts I'd see more harm in people actually trying to talk more to each other, whether it be via phone or just regular f2f conversation, compared to just texting/emailing.
I answer the phone with a repitition of the number while standing up ....but answering the answer phone does become a chore if you have to pay a small fee to listen to your answer phone messages and are forced to go out in a blizzard just to hear "Sorry I've got the wrong number.".
I am always getting moaned at for ringing back without listing to the message but what happens is someone rings, I goto answer the phone... miss it by milliseconds, try phoning them back... engaged... put it on call back.... it gets though 30 seconds later... "Hi you just rang?"... get moaned at for not listing to the message they just left while I had them on call back.
The other day my stepdad wanted me to text my sister and tell her we'd be there in five minutes but needed directions to the place where she was staying.
"Why don't I just call her?" I said, to which he replied that it would be "much faster" to text.
It wasn't. Long story short, I ended up having HIM text it for me, because, after ten minutes, my grammar-observing fingers still hadn't managed to text out that simple message. I'm sixteen years old. It would have been easier -and faster -to call.
I disagree with this one. Answering email is a small chore. Answering texts is like replying when spoken to, except you can think of a response first. Taking a phone call stops whatever else you're doing - in public, you go "sorry, but whatever's coming in is more important than you, so I have to take this." If you're watching something with people, you pause it for everyone or miss it. Many are also masters of dragging a 5 min call into 80 min so you just dread answering, where txt is succinct.
@dojomojomofo Sure answering a phone diverts your attention away from anything you were doing. But I think texting is MUCH worse for that. When you answer a call you normally leave for a few minutes then come back. Conversation over. No need to continue thinking about it.
With texts the conversation lasts for an amazingly long time with people drifting in and out of staring at the phone with me asking "are you listening?" Much ruder really.
@plukerpluck I've seen people do that, but it's never happened to me. Mostly, in text, it's a few messages back and forth to get the general point across, but if someone phones me, I don't know if they're going to drag it past a half hour or repeat all the points again and again. I'd actually let it go to voicemail and text back if more people had texting plans... I still know few who do.
@dojomojomofo That's so funny, because all of the younger people in this world pretty much don't know how to actually ring someone.
I was on a skiing trip and only one other person was smart enough to use the slightly more expensive minutes to call me. He was the only person I was ever able to find... the others replied to texts too slow or weren't precise enough.
I do listen to voicemail. In fact I almost always refuse a phonecall because it's much easier to hear what a person has to say so you can think about whether or not you actually want to respond, because you don't always want to respond, do you?
But if you answer the phone and it's someone you don't want to talk to, you're fucked. You can't hang up because then they know you don't want to talk to them which will make talking to them when you inevitably do even more awkward than to start with.
Txting has the advantage of being answered in your own time. You can choose whether you want to answer this person or not. Phone calls always come at a time convenient to the caller - NOT you. Txting and emails allows temporal decoupling.
My theory is that with the advent of cheap unlimited texting plans, and horrendously expensive talk time, is that texting is now the most cost efficient way of having a conversation.
that's all well and good but it still doesn't explain how the idea caught on since texting was outrageously expensive before the relatively new invention of unlimited text plans. Also most cell phone plans with unlimited texting also include unlimited calling or else an absurd amount of minutes that no decent human who isn't a doctor lawyer or world leader should ever need to use.
In Australia recently an assailant broke into a wealthy business man's home, seemingly to extort him. Finding only the man's daughter at the house the intruder came to the obvious decision of strapping a bomb (fake) to the girl’s neck, leaving a list of demands and then absconding off somewhere. The girl charged with what she should do next, found it prudent to let someone know of her situation. She did this by texting her father. You can only imagine how the text read "bmb rnd neck... fml".
I was beginning to think I was the only person in the world to try to use correct spelling and punctuationin text messages. I'm dyslexic you see, it took me long enough get my head around the written language so the least people could do is use it properly.
I've got to say that this is one of his best rants! "God I'm 80" its so true as well! Texting is all good, but I do fine myself getting annoyed at having to sit there and make sure it almost nearly grammatically correct/punctuation. Also typing on the internet is very time consuming if you have a long story to tell someone, its just makes more sense to use the old dog and bone! Trouble is theses day no one wants to use it.
I have to say I do have a 'phobia' of phone calls, which is proabably why I didn't last very long at the call centre. Although, 'text speak' makes me sick to th core. The only person who uses it is my mum because she thinks it's 'cool'.
Have to say I disagree with this one. Phone calls are difficult and scary, and you have to keep saying "Sorry I missed that...what? What? Doesn't matter." I often just don't answer my phone because I don't want to. NB: I have friends
@orenofhowick He is of average looks, obviously cares about how he looks, bathes and grooms, has decent taste in clothes, pulls his pants all the way up--heck he even wears a belt, he is intelligent and (for those of us in the US at least) has a charming accent. Do you want any more reasons I bet I can find some. Oh and the hostile condescending thing is no less attractive than any other macho man behavior and actually better than some (facial tattoos for instance).
As a prolific ranter and a fan of long, obscure rants I find this channel magnificent! What could I have done, but to subscribe?
Which reminds me I have to go and write a blog article about Youtube yes-men who have nothing to contribute in the comments but simple, unconstructive praises.
This is totally my thoughts on texting, I have to have full, grammatical sentences. Though I disagree about email, that's one of the best way to get hold of me....
Phones are enormously intrusive. They're the only sort of communication that demand you stop doing whatever you're doing and deal with them immediately.
@pixxispad Exactly. Plus you just know that you're going to get called by that one prick who won't shut up and when you say that you 'have to go' they ask 'why?', as if they know they're being insufferable and are trying to catch you out trying to save their feelings.
Texts are less intrusive, less annoying for those in the immediate vicinity, and don't have those horrid times (even with good friends) when both of you say something/laugh at the same time and there's some little awkward pause.
@JumpingRhubarb Those are letters, learn to read... or acknoledge the existence of the alphabet, which has been around since the Greeks so you must have heard of it by now.
Oh my god voicemail is such aggro. I have a message on mine saying don't bother, text me. If you don't then I'll deem whatever you left in the voicemail unimportant.
@WalterLiddy Not really - nothing wrong with signalling a preference. Besides, it's a damned sight better than leaving the default greeting and never checking it.
The reason I don't listen to voicemail is because it's time-consuming to listen to the bloody robot running the message centre, and the people leaving the messages usually just request I call them back anyway. Also, it costs money to listen to voicemail.
@Xanatos712 a bloody lot of of money if you're on pay-as-you-go, also I can pretty much guarantee than 90% of the messages I get just say "Where the fuck are you?" and then ring off
My issue with texting is with the people doing the texting, because it seems that they're always doing it while walking down the street completely oblivious to their surroundings and it's up to me to extrapolate their trajectory and dance around them because God forbid they should look up and notice the real world and commit even the slightest act of common courtesy.
It's cost. It's often cheaper using a mobile phone to send a few texts than to telephone. It's also often cheaper to telephone and ask someone than to listen to voicemail. We weren't all born with a silver spoon up our arse Mr. Mitchell.
@RobertHartlepool For fuck sake it's a jokey video. I never call people, I always text, but I still think it's hilarious. You're taking it too seriously, you don't have to personally agree with everything he says!
I totally agree with this! I'm so used to just call people back when they text me but they always seem to be surprised and even irritated that I call them instead of just texting back.
Funny how I get answered like "Sorry, can't talk I'm driving.. text me back"
Like how the hell is it easier for him to send me a long text message and then read what I send back while driving, rather than just ringing me and have the conversation end in less than 30sec. Much safer that way yet illegal, I guess.
@venim1103 Ah, only illegal in a number of states. We Canadians aren't forced to to disengage our phones while driving yet; nevertheless, we kill each other and ourselves in cars with greater numbers..*chuckle*.
The bit about 'I saw there was a message so I rang back straight away, what was the message?'... that happens to me at work ALL. THE. TIME. And it's not like we don't tell them EXACTLY what the call is about, along with a handy reference number or extension for call back. AND the people we call are, presumably, intelligent and highly educated. Because they're doctors.
I find texting is good when you can't really be seen talking on the phone, like during a movie, or when listening to your girlfriend over the dinner table, or driving. Oh, I'd better add a smiley so people know I'm joking... ;P
I think that mobile phones are a terrible barrier to conversations. Been to a children's get together lately? They are all texting other kids saying how much fun they are having whilst not having it. Or texting about how much they hate it whilst not trying to find something better to do. Everyne is so eager to be seen as being in contact with someone (therefore not friendless). It is rare to see a person just walking down the street without a phone or mp3 to their ear.
It is funny how years ago if the phone went everyone would 'leggit' to the phone as quickly as possible, before it rung onto the answering machine. Whereas with mobiles you just look at the screen and decide if you want to answer.
PS great stuff DM, although ease up on the faux anger, a little bit is good, but then so is calm but scorching, dry sarcasam.
'With my text hating, but capital observing thumbs'
Porelax17 21 hours ago
David's Mitchell's vitriol just forced me to check my messages for the first time in about a week.
GeneralGuitFiddle 4 days ago
fuck house phones. I canceled my land line the day I got a cellphone.
shanpipah 4 days ago
Some have a decent excuse for not listening to messages. I, for example have to spend an extortionate amount of time and money just to hear a message.
aksquash 6 days ago
I like how the camera cuts side ways when the real anger hits :P
orangeedo 1 week ago
sounds like you need a phone with a QWERTY keyboard, they are sooo much faster for texting
4at4ish 1 week ago
dell do rubbish laptops......get a mac
cyrilsnare 1 week ago
@cyrilsnare macs have rubbish third party support, get something other than a mac
4at4ish 1 week ago
This has been flagged as spam show
Hey David, I see you recorded a SoapBox message. I didn't listen to it though because I was too distracted by the room full of alphabet soup. What was it you wanted to say?
Siabohnic 1 week ago
Comment removed
Siabohnic 1 week ago
hate! people who dont listen to their voice box!
AndreLeCoz 1 week ago
A text is much more of a chore to answer than an email because of the tiny buttons on a phone.
shadowofdread 2 weeks ago in playlist More videos from davidmitchellsoapbox
Mmmmmmm, Alphabeti Spaghetti!
nontrainspotter 2 weeks ago in playlist Series 3
I'm only 22 but remember in my old house the phone has it's own little spot in the hall with a phone table, and he is right, if it rang we would run and answer it. Now most calls to the house phone get ignored unless it's a number we recognise
fecto3210 2 weeks ago
@fecto3210 Personally I only ignore the call if there's no calling number displayed at all. When I actually picked up incognito phone calls they were either silly "tricks" or people asking you out about loads of rubbish for some public opinion poll which I'm not interested in.
argh1989 1 week ago
People don't listen to messages because it cost £
fecto3210 2 weeks ago
the new andy rooney
bignoze123 3 weeks ago
The background looks like dead babies floating in blood :(
DearBossMusic 3 weeks ago
I'm 80 too.
sk4lman 3 weeks ago
@sk4lman ur 82 lol
kingpharaohtsar 2 weeks ago
lol closed capture can't keep up
jinofthethunder 3 weeks ago
lol i havent answered my house phone since 2007
glen432 3 weeks ago 10
@glen432 Haven't had a house phone since 2001 :)
sk4lman 3 weeks ago
david can u marry me?
Hot2bme1 4 weeks ago
That's fine David, but if you start calling people in public and you raise your voice as you do in this video, don't be surprised if I punch you in the face.
KryzMasta 1 month ago
@KryzMasta and what will that solve?
IsaacDeanMusic 3 weeks ago
Fact is, both mediums have their uses. Calls and texts are equally as important in a stupidly fast society, one to make quick responses, the other to organise complex and difficult arrangements. Though, I usually handle the latter in an email.
withthebirdillshare 1 month ago
Caaaan't stoooop waaatching the souuup of BLOOOOOOOODDD!!
redavatar 1 month ago
Can't...breathe! ROFLMAO
Hissdogafin 1 month ago
Why.... that background? Its lovely, but.... why?
GarethJonesify 1 month ago
Lol at the Audio transcribe :-D "I don't even know how the upstairs balls worked" X-D
Angelsdownfall 1 month ago
@Angelsdownfall learn to read
CSS3Examples 1 month ago
I fucking hate ringing people, and I hate even more when people ring me - I'd say that I simply refuse to answer (for a variety of reasons) at least 90% of the time. Just hate talking over the phone.
Which is slightly ironic, as my day job involves calling people up to do surveys...
arbeitsscheuer 1 month ago 3
@arbeitsscheuer what you do for a living probably explains why the rest of us don't like answering the phone much!
LordStraightBanana 1 month ago
My God, I'm eighty.
Szaam 1 month ago 3
My dad and I both dislike using the phone very much - I actually drove down to the mechanic to see if he could inspect my car that day because that option was, to me, easier than and preferable to calling him. (He couldn't. I drove back the next day and got it done then.)
timmyhkvt 1 month ago
ARGH I hate making or taking phone calls. It makes me incredibly nervous, sometimes even if it's a close friend. I also sound like an idiot because for some reason I just... slow down mentally and I have none of the time that I do with texts to check something or think up a reply. Besides that, I have never gotten a text from a person with the wrong number, but everyone I know has received a wrong number phone call.
TheRainstorm97 1 month ago 4
@TheRainstorm97
I'm EXACTLY the same way. x___x hate it.
310BPM 1 month ago
Could somebody PLEASE at least give David a hand job!?
thecrazychef1 1 month ago 3
@thecrazychef1 I for one, would love to, but I'm pretty certain he's not so desperate
TheLemonGrenade 1 month ago
Who else checked their phone at the beginning of this?
Personally i prefer texting because then there is a constant transcription of the conversation, so i don't forget dates, places, etc
JhericFury 1 month ago
Texting gives you more time to think of a response.
RichyBMelodies 1 month ago
I would be much more happy to call if it didn't cost me a dollar ever bloody minute. That's why I love skype.
mastershakeaq 1 month ago
I hate both. I just aint a fan of talking to anyone not in person....except on internet video website boards...
Hopeful71 1 month ago
Amusing. But I absolutely hate phones, much bigger chore for me than texts or short emails.
LupusCanis 1 month ago
Fucking aye David!
MarekUtd 1 month ago
David Mitchell is one of the only english speakers who speaks so clearly that Youtube Transcribe Audio actually turns his words into captions.
jwchase2005 1 month ago 62
My friends find it weird that I only use texts to say "Where are you" or "What time are we meeting" you know, things texts are meant for. They seem to enjoy telling me about how "Oh I send about 4000 texts a month to my girlfriend" well good for you, if that's the best part of a relationship I'll go and get chemically castrated tomorrow.
timdavies90 1 month ago
hehehe I love the tiny second of realization at the end. Hilarious.
ronnysoeberg 1 month ago
Thing is most people I know do use texts for somewhat trivial, ephemeral things like the "we are there" text. Actually, most people don't text me that much, so maybe it's just me....
Gabagabe1 1 month ago
that letter comparison is amazing.
brrrianbadonde 1 month ago
I would assume that the preference regarding the choice of spoken/written telecommunication is pretty much a culture related issue. Coming from probably the world's most socially awkward country filled with introverts I'd see more harm in people actually trying to talk more to each other, whether it be via phone or just regular f2f conversation, compared to just texting/emailing.
MrKasiainen 1 month ago
I love text. I don't like talking on the phone. I would rather text any day, no matter how convoluted the message. Is that wrong? Am I autistic?
D1rtyraver 1 month ago
@QueenOfTheAubergines Love your username
Zjebroiska 1 month ago
He has gone into my brain & said everything I think about this subject!
adreenal 1 month ago
"My God I'm 80" :L :L
MSMusiclover99 1 month ago
"Well I'm free all sorts of times, but with a variety of complications and preferences!" LOVE David Mitchell :)
aimeefran 1 month ago
Thing is, if you're really socially awkward (like me) texting means you don't have the added awkwardness of a face-to-face conversation.
He's right though
QueenOfTheAubergines 1 month ago 4
@QueenOfTheAubergines Agreed. As another socially awkward person, text is just fine for me, thanks.
D1rtyraver 1 month ago
I text people with the words, "call me".
NarfBLAST 1 month ago 4
is that some sort of river of afterbirth? yuck. he should do a video on the grossness of that next.
buttersyrupnpancakes 1 month ago
So why exactly is he sitting on a phone floating in alphabetti spaghetti?
IcyThrills 1 month ago 3
Yes, yes, YES! Preach, brother!
hollyvict 1 month ago
I answer the phone with a repitition of the number while standing up ....but answering the answer phone does become a chore if you have to pay a small fee to listen to your answer phone messages and are forced to go out in a blizzard just to hear "Sorry I've got the wrong number.".
temporaldisplacement 2 months ago
I am always getting moaned at for ringing back without listing to the message but what happens is someone rings, I goto answer the phone... miss it by milliseconds, try phoning them back... engaged... put it on call back.... it gets though 30 seconds later... "Hi you just rang?"... get moaned at for not listing to the message they just left while I had them on call back.
DavidBennell 2 months ago
The other day my stepdad wanted me to text my sister and tell her we'd be there in five minutes but needed directions to the place where she was staying.
"Why don't I just call her?" I said, to which he replied that it would be "much faster" to text.
It wasn't. Long story short, I ended up having HIM text it for me, because, after ten minutes, my grammar-observing fingers still hadn't managed to text out that simple message. I'm sixteen years old. It would have been easier -and faster -to call.
10nantFangirl 3 months ago
I disagree with this one. Answering email is a small chore. Answering texts is like replying when spoken to, except you can think of a response first. Taking a phone call stops whatever else you're doing - in public, you go "sorry, but whatever's coming in is more important than you, so I have to take this." If you're watching something with people, you pause it for everyone or miss it. Many are also masters of dragging a 5 min call into 80 min so you just dread answering, where txt is succinct.
dojomojomofo 3 months ago 2
@dojomojomofo Sure answering a phone diverts your attention away from anything you were doing. But I think texting is MUCH worse for that. When you answer a call you normally leave for a few minutes then come back. Conversation over. No need to continue thinking about it.
With texts the conversation lasts for an amazingly long time with people drifting in and out of staring at the phone with me asking "are you listening?" Much ruder really.
(Targeted at the younger generation)
plukerpluck 2 months ago
@plukerpluck I've seen people do that, but it's never happened to me. Mostly, in text, it's a few messages back and forth to get the general point across, but if someone phones me, I don't know if they're going to drag it past a half hour or repeat all the points again and again. I'd actually let it go to voicemail and text back if more people had texting plans... I still know few who do.
dojomojomofo 2 months ago
@dojomojomofo That's so funny, because all of the younger people in this world pretty much don't know how to actually ring someone.
I was on a skiing trip and only one other person was smart enough to use the slightly more expensive minutes to call me. He was the only person I was ever able to find... the others replied to texts too slow or weren't precise enough.
plukerpluck 2 months ago
I'd love to have a phone chat with you David.
Sabre809 3 months ago
I do listen to voicemail. In fact I almost always refuse a phonecall because it's much easier to hear what a person has to say so you can think about whether or not you actually want to respond, because you don't always want to respond, do you?
But if you answer the phone and it's someone you don't want to talk to, you're fucked. You can't hang up because then they know you don't want to talk to them which will make talking to them when you inevitably do even more awkward than to start with.
GoodW0lf 4 months ago
The telephone is intrinsically a rude device.
Antifides 4 months ago
Txting has the advantage of being answered in your own time. You can choose whether you want to answer this person or not. Phone calls always come at a time convenient to the caller - NOT you. Txting and emails allows temporal decoupling.
cheetah100 4 months ago
Agree with most of these by David, but this one especially. Well said!
ChristopherJRobin 5 months ago
I find it ironic that I was texting while watching this...
samjilling 5 months ago
99,999 views? What are the chances?
MrMike0113 5 months ago
@MrMike0113
About one in one hundred thousand, I'd say.
Tonjevic 5 months ago in playlist Videos from davidmitchellsoapbox
@Tonjevic Seems about right.
MrMike0113 5 months ago
This is why I love this man.
z3r0t0l3r4ns 5 months ago
He's got a point. My grandmother is 83 and uses a walking stick, however when that phone rings - LORD there's no stopping the old bird.
sandrsofias 6 months ago 91
I don't like how you're inching forward
MAKootage 6 months ago
My theory is that with the advent of cheap unlimited texting plans, and horrendously expensive talk time, is that texting is now the most cost efficient way of having a conversation.
10inchserratedblade 6 months ago
@10inchserratedblade
that's all well and good but it still doesn't explain how the idea caught on since texting was outrageously expensive before the relatively new invention of unlimited text plans. Also most cell phone plans with unlimited texting also include unlimited calling or else an absurd amount of minutes that no decent human who isn't a doctor lawyer or world leader should ever need to use.
z3r0t0l3r4ns 5 months ago
In Australia recently an assailant broke into a wealthy business man's home, seemingly to extort him. Finding only the man's daughter at the house the intruder came to the obvious decision of strapping a bomb (fake) to the girl’s neck, leaving a list of demands and then absconding off somewhere. The girl charged with what she should do next, found it prudent to let someone know of her situation. She did this by texting her father. You can only imagine how the text read "bmb rnd neck... fml".
pitchshifter02 6 months ago
Lol
MrRymax07 6 months ago
Don’t Call Me, I Won’t Call You. j. mp / nl6fWf
galindes 6 months ago
Don’t Call Me, I Won’t Call You. j. mp / nl6fWf
galindes 6 months ago
I was beginning to think I was the only person in the world to try to use correct spelling and punctuationin text messages. I'm dyslexic you see, it took me long enough get my head around the written language so the least people could do is use it properly.
magicalmrwest 6 months ago
I'd like to hear David respond as he did at 1:10 if you asked him to meet up over the phone
Seekreprieve 7 months ago
that is a mildly disturbing background
LaLongeCarbine 7 months ago 140
Watch his right hand when he starts getting really mad.
hamburgerhelperflick 7 months ago
haha love it
Edbrad 7 months ago
I've got to say that this is one of his best rants! "God I'm 80" its so true as well! Texting is all good, but I do fine myself getting annoyed at having to sit there and make sure it almost nearly grammatically correct/punctuation. Also typing on the internet is very time consuming if you have a long story to tell someone, its just makes more sense to use the old dog and bone! Trouble is theses day no one wants to use it.
MsCaptainBubbles 7 months ago
I have to say I do have a 'phobia' of phone calls, which is proabably why I didn't last very long at the call centre. Although, 'text speak' makes me sick to th core. The only person who uses it is my mum because she thinks it's 'cool'.
TheBoothy93 7 months ago
When the house phone rings, I shit bricks. I let it go to answerphone, and only pick it up if it's one of the people I live with.
RichyBabess 7 months ago
Have to say I disagree with this one. Phone calls are difficult and scary, and you have to keep saying "Sorry I missed that...what? What? Doesn't matter." I often just don't answer my phone because I don't want to. NB: I have friends
MissDraiha 7 months ago
How come so many women have crushes on David? I don't understand it- I'm hostile and condescending and nothing!
orenofhowick 7 months ago
Comment removed
AnnaMaeHare 7 months ago
@orenofhowick He is of average looks, obviously cares about how he looks, bathes and grooms, has decent taste in clothes, pulls his pants all the way up--heck he even wears a belt, he is intelligent and (for those of us in the US at least) has a charming accent. Do you want any more reasons I bet I can find some. Oh and the hostile condescending thing is no less attractive than any other macho man behavior and actually better than some (facial tattoos for instance).
AnnaMaeHare 7 months ago
This comment has received too many negative votes show
What a painfully boring and pointless rant with no actual fact based points.
Truman10000000000 7 months ago
As a prolific ranter and a fan of long, obscure rants I find this channel magnificent! What could I have done, but to subscribe?
Which reminds me I have to go and write a blog article about Youtube yes-men who have nothing to contribute in the comments but simple, unconstructive praises.
Frogthroat1 7 months ago 2
Mitchell and web acting goofy is just not funny or entertaining its just annoying
Lucifer986 7 months ago
It actually pains me to write in "txt spk" without capital letters, punctuation, or spelling. I just won't do it.
bored1980 7 months ago 3
Alas, once again I won't even watch it because of the bloody advert!
81Mace81 7 months ago
I had a university professor complain that nobody bothers with email anymore. How quickly times change.
Xhalph 8 months ago
1:10 - he could just text "19th wud be ideal"?
Calls cost 40p, texts are free!
But then money is no object when you are an alphabetti spaghetti baron
RobBrooksMusic 8 months ago 2
Ring off!!.(PUNCTUATED) or Ring off?.....bwaaaahaaahaaa !(NOT PUNCTUATED)
snoep25 8 months ago
My voicemail costs money to fucking access so fuck that.
Mjhavok 8 months ago
@Mjhavok I'm too scared to leave voicemail, if you make a mistake then that shit is recorded for life
RobBrooksMusic 8 months ago
why is there pasta in the background?
chatty2207 8 months ago
This is totally my thoughts on texting, I have to have full, grammatical sentences. Though I disagree about email, that's one of the best way to get hold of me....
EmilyDNelson 8 months ago 2
the stupid background was distracting imo
komic06 8 months ago
but i hate phone calls they're so intrusive and rude, texts allow you to answer in your own time while calls demand answering immediately
TRDPaul 8 months ago 3
Did anyone else check their phone because of the interference beeping in the intro.
oOAlexB321Oo 8 months ago 2
Going on your mobile voicemail usually costs a bomb =/
katieamelia8 8 months ago
I thought I was getting called when the intro came on..
SirStranjak 8 months ago
I have a slight phobia of ringing phones :(
Horatio 8 months ago 3
Phones are enormously intrusive. They're the only sort of communication that demand you stop doing whatever you're doing and deal with them immediately.
pixxispad 8 months ago 3
@pixxispad Exactly. Plus you just know that you're going to get called by that one prick who won't shut up and when you say that you 'have to go' they ask 'why?', as if they know they're being insufferable and are trying to catch you out trying to save their feelings.
Texts are less intrusive, less annoying for those in the immediate vicinity, and don't have those horrid times (even with good friends) when both of you say something/laugh at the same time and there's some little awkward pause.
lolomfgmen 8 months ago
David Mitchell has been successfully wound up for this series.
I never use the phone anyway... I have Skype on my laptop, which I never leave :)
(See what I did there)
Again then :)
Alexc3217 8 months ago
What's with the baked beans?
JumpingRhubarb 8 months ago
@JumpingRhubarb Those are letters, learn to read... or acknoledge the existence of the alphabet, which has been around since the Greeks so you must have heard of it by now.
Alexc3217 8 months ago
he missed out the very relevant point that some folk have free texts but not free calls and are tight bastards so don't use money on phone calls.
johntheduncan 8 months ago
I think I have some sort of intellectual crush on David Mitchell.
ProudToBeNerdy 8 months ago 151
@ProudToBeNerdy
You and me both.
But for me it's more of a full crush. Not joking.
twoplusoneisthree 8 months ago
@ProudToBeNerdy yeah and just cuz he's hot.
buttersyrupnpancakes 1 month ago
It seems extraordinary that he had to get someone else to help him write this. It's all very "yawn" isn't it.
HitMeQuick 8 months ago
I text like David...good grammar and spelling is far better than "hlo, how r u?"
Jessmo198 8 months ago
Marry me David :D
YaN8XiaojiE 8 months ago
Oh my god voicemail is such aggro. I have a message on mine saying don't bother, text me. If you don't then I'll deem whatever you left in the voicemail unimportant.
Edae001 8 months ago
@Edae001 How unbelievably moronic.
WalterLiddy 8 months ago
@WalterLiddy Not really - nothing wrong with signalling a preference. Besides, it's a damned sight better than leaving the default greeting and never checking it.
lolomfgmen 8 months ago
The reason I don't listen to voicemail is because it's time-consuming to listen to the bloody robot running the message centre, and the people leaving the messages usually just request I call them back anyway. Also, it costs money to listen to voicemail.
Xanatos712 8 months ago 58
@Xanatos712 a bloody lot of of money if you're on pay-as-you-go, also I can pretty much guarantee than 90% of the messages I get just say "Where the fuck are you?" and then ring off
gdude545 7 months ago
@Xanatos712
where the fuck do you life?
TheKangLock 6 months ago
@TheKangLock "Life" is not a verb.
Xanatos712 6 months ago 4
My issue with texting is with the people doing the texting, because it seems that they're always doing it while walking down the street completely oblivious to their surroundings and it's up to me to extrapolate their trajectory and dance around them because God forbid they should look up and notice the real world and commit even the slightest act of common courtesy.
ELuhn 8 months ago
@PointlessAndAwesome yes
Howard00Wolowitz 8 months ago
Here here. I quite agree. I usually call instead of texting if there is something I find it important to say.
facejobby 8 months ago
It's cost. It's often cheaper using a mobile phone to send a few texts than to telephone. It's also often cheaper to telephone and ask someone than to listen to voicemail. We weren't all born with a silver spoon up our arse Mr. Mitchell.
RobertHartlepool 8 months ago
@RobertHartlepool For fuck sake it's a jokey video. I never call people, I always text, but I still think it's hilarious. You're taking it too seriously, you don't have to personally agree with everything he says!
Bazlovesmusic 8 months ago
Blame Nokia, back in the 90s.
RBeakful 8 months ago
The great thing about texting for me is I don't have to spend 10 minutes trying to get off the phone with someone who won't shut up.
"Well I have to go."
"BUT WAIT I HAVE ANOTHER ANECDOTE THE OTHER DAY I SAID TO SO AND SO I SAID--"
"I really, REALLY have to go now."
"And so he says--"
"I'm going to be late for work!"
ToastyJane 8 months ago
I feel like he takes what's in my head that ticks me off and makes it more intelligent and adds the accent. My sentiments exactly, David.
Janiemanie1993 8 months ago
I tend to write gramatically correct text messages.... But I don't put capitals for the days of the week....
RandomZee101 8 months ago
Communication prefs in order: email>text>phone>actually speaking face to face. You'll be advocating video phones next, gawd help us.
Widds 8 months ago
David, most people have to pay extra to listen to their messages!
blibbax 8 months ago 2
my question is...whatever happened to the bubble
garethkielty 8 months ago
The background is especially creative in this episode... Props to whoever does these.
Jasonbobdude 8 months ago 6
I totally agree with this! I'm so used to just call people back when they text me but they always seem to be surprised and even irritated that I call them instead of just texting back.
Funny how I get answered like "Sorry, can't talk I'm driving.. text me back"
Like how the hell is it easier for him to send me a long text message and then read what I send back while driving, rather than just ringing me and have the conversation end in less than 30sec. Much safer that way yet illegal, I guess.
venim1103 8 months ago
@venim1103 Ah, only illegal in a number of states. We Canadians aren't forced to to disengage our phones while driving yet; nevertheless, we kill each other and ourselves in cars with greater numbers..*chuckle*.
IntrapersonalKent 8 months ago
The bit about 'I saw there was a message so I rang back straight away, what was the message?'... that happens to me at work ALL. THE. TIME. And it's not like we don't tell them EXACTLY what the call is about, along with a handy reference number or extension for call back. AND the people we call are, presumably, intelligent and highly educated. Because they're doctors.
JaceDraccus 8 months ago
Hm. I actually wish there was more texting and fewer phone calls. But then, I need to use public transport all the time.
MistressSiana 8 months ago
I find texting is good when you can't really be seen talking on the phone, like during a movie, or when listening to your girlfriend over the dinner table, or driving. Oh, I'd better add a smiley so people know I'm joking... ;P
RyanTL85 8 months ago
David Mitchell can teach me aaaaaalll he wants about the mystical language of the mouth.
TheDSil 8 months ago 4
i didn't realise telephone signals were transmitted via alphabet soup
neomp5 8 months ago 3
that bit were he say 'My god im 80'
he acts like robert web
missfish123 8 months ago
I second this, i hate texting, i wish people just phoned each other!
SainterX 8 months ago
Why is he floating in a river of spaghetti shapes?
elinofgreengables 8 months ago
@elinofgreengables Alphabet soup. It looks rather disturbing, actually.
khaninator 8 months ago
David Mitchell, you are a great great man!
silentbob82 8 months ago
Didn't Andy Rooney used to do this nonplussed curmudgeon schtick on 60 Minutes?
bladder1010 8 months ago
Completely agree.
I think that mobile phones are a terrible barrier to conversations. Been to a children's get together lately? They are all texting other kids saying how much fun they are having whilst not having it. Or texting about how much they hate it whilst not trying to find something better to do. Everyne is so eager to be seen as being in contact with someone (therefore not friendless). It is rare to see a person just walking down the street without a phone or mp3 to their ear.
O2BSoLucky 8 months ago
@O2BSoLucky or a banana
tiarnan76 8 months ago
@O2BSoLucky Amen.
MrShnizzle69 8 months ago
Last line...perfect! Nicely done, as always.
Underlings 8 months ago 3
It is funny how years ago if the phone went everyone would 'leggit' to the phone as quickly as possible, before it rung onto the answering machine. Whereas with mobiles you just look at the screen and decide if you want to answer.
PS great stuff DM, although ease up on the faux anger, a little bit is good, but then so is calm but scorching, dry sarcasam.
perfacetus 8 months ago
Did anyone else look to see if their phone was around the speaker during the opening jingle?
sleepyjunny 8 months ago 5
ah i love counting all the shillings ive saved not investing in a cell phone...i think i may be 90
jeremyshambles 8 months ago in playlist darwin
this guy is ALOT like mark Corigan. it's almost hard to belive he does not write peep show.
celestialsalamander 8 months ago