Conversations with ED

[elmowantsamocha]

some of these comment make me sick. you will NEVER understand the mindset of a person with an ED unless you have one. i could tell you as many times as i want that it is not about food, it is all MENTAL, it's not about the desire to be skinny, its the need to be in control. its not a choice, and eating food wont fix your problems if you still hate yourself. so "going to the fridge" will only make things worse, because you feel like you aren't even good enough to control yourself.

stay strong <3

[WitheringChild]

Oh no! 3 people in this U.S. alone?!?! LOL- not poking fun, just thought that error was funny

[MorbidHunger]

@WitheringChild not really sure why that is funny considering thats not what it says in the video "In the United States alone, 3 people will die....today" u.s alone as opposed to the UK or another country it doesnt say "this united states" implying there is another u.s.

[WitheringChild]

@MorbidHunger When you put another sentence after an unfinished sentence it gets confusing

[JortBBB]

@MorbidHunger if you stop watching after a few seconds though, you wouldn't see the today. happened to me too ;p

[GeorgeCottier]

@MorbidHunger Is it really only 3 people? Really?

[MorbidHunger]

@GeorgeCottier 3 people every day just in the US not including other countries thats alot of people

[rmal9382personal]

I love this song. It's my favourite song /:

[alaonz1]

i want to know as it is called song that you lay eggs to the last..please thank's...i love you ? ¿

[MyNaMeIsJeSsIeW]

ive had ana for a looong time i almost died but try get help it honestly made things soo much easier. it wont dissapper but u can control it instead of it controling you.

good luck

[thirdworldassassin]

think about it this way if you never stop exorcising you can eat all you want ... or just get pregnant and then youll really know what its like to be big ... chill out ... we got more important things to worry about ... you think your to skinny because youve been conditioned to think that way ... just breack the cycle ... stop watching tv ... thats the first step

[thirdworldassassin]

oh yeah and why was this vid recomended for me anyway ... what did you type in the tags ...

[MorbidHunger]

I am pregnant actually 7 months...and i am in hell. I was never really 'too thin' in fact before I got pregnant I was 205 lbs at 5'2" sure Ive been underweight but most people with EDs are normal or overweight...so why would you still think its about being thin..apparently you didnt get that EDs are not about being thin or food or any of that. The people I spoke to (the qoutes in this video) show its more than that. and you can see the tags in the 'more info' panel.....

[thirdworldassassin]

aah it recommended this vid because i had one of my girls prego vids fav'd ... well good luck with your baby ... check out some of my vids ... the newer ones ... ok pece

[CCCConstruction]

wow 205?  that's a bit much

[voznow7]

Just go eat. No one cares how you look.

[Officetopia]

Remember that you are beautiful through God's eyes and that he made you that way for a reason. If you were meant to be someone else you would be but you aren't. Keep being brave and strong!

[Adamsaccount]

what if god doesnt exist?

what if life is a lot simpler than what you think and the reason people have ED is so they can go out and get fucked by the next scum across the bar

[cbappa1]

encyclopedia dramatica?

[SymAmineC8H11N]

ewhhh, gross.... yuummm, muriatic gastric acids!!!!!!

[EatMeImFcknDelicious]

Meh. I always thought that I'll never be pretty enough. Without eating i could be thin. There could be some other beauty in me. My body. But it's not working anyway. Nobody cares.

[BeingFatIsNotFun]

eatmeimfckndelicious..i know how it is.

[sdclub100]

@EatMeImFcknDelicious I've felt the same way...but even if it is true what you said, that no one cares-or you don't feel like they care-there are people out there that really, really do care. Believe me, I do. If you ever want to talk, or just somebody to listen who understands what it's like, message me. I'll listen.

I'm praying for you,

Sarah.

[TheUnityofOpposites]

Look up pedantic, you useless duck.

[TheUnityofOpposites]

I don't have any sympathy for anyone with an ED. There are children around the world who would be content with losing an arm in exchange for a hamburger, and you fucks lament over emaciated, middle class bitches trying to look attractive? Let's gain some perspective here, folks.

[familyjuless]

You have NO right whatsoever to say that! You don't suffer and struggle with an eating disorder every single day!

[TheUnityofOpposites]

I have the constitutional right to say whatever the hell I wish, however offensive it may be to you. I stand by my statement, and encourage you to crack open a history textbook and enlighten yourself to the true meaning of suffering.

[jaykay1447]

Oh how i hate ignorant assholes like you.

[familyjuless]

Actually, I suffer every day with this shit. Sure, you have a RIGHT to say whatever the hell you wish. But you DON'T KNOW. I don't need to crack open a history book. I deal with this shit every single day for about four years now. Every day is about what I will eat and I can't stop now. YOU are an ignorant asshole. Don't talk about eating disorders. YOU DON'T KNOW. They kill. They aren't just a big old beauty contest.

[TheUnityofOpposites]

If I 'DON'T KNOW', why don't you explain your 'condition' to me? What prevents you from walking to your goddamn fridge and eating a sandwich?

[IntellectualMidget]

if you think a book can tell you what the true meaning of suffering is,you're not only an asshole,but a moron to boot...suffering is not entirely objective,and it means many things to many people.considering your self-righteous, pompous piece of shit attitude, i'd say YOU don't know anything about suffering.now,while we all crack open history books, you should try a psychology book, read up on the physiological effects of such disorders, though i doubt someone like you could ever be enlightened

[TheUnityofOpposites]

You claim that books are without the capacity to aptly depict the meaning of suffering, yet you advise me to read psychology books in order to understand eating disorders (which you equate to suffering). You really are an intellectual midget.

[IntellectualMidget]

wow... im really sorry to have put you down. it should have been apparent right away, but i missed it, i didn't realize you were mentally deficient. nowhere in my comment did i equate a psychological disorder with suffering... yes, the disorder can CAUSE suffering, but the two are not the same, at all (now you should try a dictionary :)

[TheUnityofOpposites]

I'd ignore your cute dictionary jabs and respond to you in a manner that was less than hostile if your post actually had substance other than a pedantic fixation with my post about your equating of suffering to physc. harm. You have said that ED leads to phys. and psycho. suffering. But I don't even know why I'm arguing with someone who admits (quite rightly) to be an intellectual midget. Don't bother replying or you'll just be proven as an attention seeking handicap with an internet connection.

[IntellectualMidget]

ouch, there's nothing worse than using ''pedantic'' out of context, though it does provide an excellent example of its definition, and the contents of your posts help to clarify what ignorance and arrogance mean.

anyway, if it helps you sleep ill make this my last post, i really have wasted too much time here, and i feel all the little red numbers next to your comments speak for themselves...

[IntellectualMidget]

no book can fully describe a subjectively felt emotion like suffering, however, a psychology book CAN educate you on the symptoms of a mental disorder such as ED, and such illnesses are very well documented with full scientific research done to help better understand them, and since you obviously have no idea what this disorder can do, i thought you might want check one out... you also don't seem to know what ''physiological effects'' means (dictionary time again!)

[Jeff92187]

Hey asshole,

It's not just "middle class bitches trying to look attractive". If you had any fucking clue, you'd realize that EDs have very little to do with looks, but your dickhead is so far up your ass that you wouldn't notice. You want some perspective... you try living with memories of incest, physical abuse, and every other fucking little thing while you've been driven to perform your entire life with no hopes of ever being good enough for dicks like you!

[krystalstarr01]

wow, you are very pretty stop cutting yourself damnit!! ha ha i dont get it, you are so pretty fuck the scars but i get it i hate the pain, i hate eating, i hate how much i really love it, i hate how it feels to throw up, but i love the feeling of pure, love the euphoria of throwing up, being drunk, it all

[adarkenedmind]

My heart goes out to all those who suffer from one of these diseases. It's heartbreaking that so many of them don't have help readily available to them, because no one knows what they're going through. And it's hard to get help on your own.

[psychdrugtruth]

Please go to Yahoo and type in the phrase "Horrible Truth About Psychiatric Drugs" into their search to find a report that reveals the truth about theee drugs that no psychiatrist will tell you. Also do the search with the phrase "Documented Proof Psychiatric Drugs Shorten Lifespan". Be sure to include the quotes to narrow the search so you find the intended research paper on these drugs/ The drugs promote suicide and violence not prevent, cause impotence, no libido and make you fat disphoric.

[doireannland]

thats not all of them though, some of the older ones (eg. prozac) have been found to make people quite impulsive which puts them at high risk for suicide considering that they will have days,even with medication when they will be quite low.

a lot of the newer ones (eg lexapro) dont tend to make you impulsive or cause weight gain. everyones different some meds just wont suit a person, they have to try another. generally though, newer ones are much better than the old ones

[Spontanyus]

I don't mean to be judgemental so forgive me for saying this but there are certain shots and dialogue in this video that sensationalize the behaviors associated with ED's. The symptoms of ED are in a way glorified by you in some of the shots and the manner in which they are presented. ED's are a grim, sad reality and not something that should be presented as a piece of pop culture 'ID'. BTW cutting is based on self loathing, no one photographs that kind of behaviour unless they are 'projecting'.

[ValleyGurlFrmHell]

you are saying alot of the truth but when you are going through both of these illnesses you wish and beg and try to keep everyone from knowing but at the same time your screaming out for help. But then you feel horrible and like a coward for asking for it and do it more but then you also want help. You need someone to care who cant really touch you in real life. Kind of confusing to understand but it makes you insane. things that were not normal or wierd before are just everyday things to u now

[adarkenedmind]

You've got the right understanding of the diseases... and i wish that every male or female that suffers from an ED will end up getting help and get healthy and get the psychological therapy they need to stay that way.

[xMyReflection]

This video is really good. The thoughts and feelings are well explained. It shows people this is not the way...

[steelhrt14]

My wife went through this, she battles everyday. God bless you. "we" don't understand like those who are there fighting. Life's about the journey...don't let it interupt you!!! Just do your BEST! really, YOUR BEST!!!

[myfatproductions]

go use meth it will help alot!

[FlowersbloomforHim]

I liked the video, those thoughts are all so real

[vidmastr26]

I wish everyone the best and if you have an ED get the help you so deserve.

[MorbidHunger]

oh you know what I am going to change the title, because I want comments on the content of the damn video (I feel its a very very important message) and not on the title of the song I chose to use with it...f*cki*g o.c.d. pricks...and Im Borderline Personality, so Im allowed to say that, nice how that works

[tatiana8745]

um how is this schizophrenic....?? this is Anorexic and bulimia. This is the wrong title for the video. People aren't looking to see this video. The video is nice but it's titled wrong. change the title so the people u want to view it can watch it.

[MorbidHunger]

Again for the millionth time (IF YOU WOULD JUST READ THE DESCRIPTION OF THE VIDEO) the title is the name of the song, the song NOR the video is about Schizophrenia, however the song fits the subject if you look at it from my POV. I am not changing anything. get over it.

[tatiana8745]

Right... i don't have anything to get over i'm just speaking the truth.I wasn't looking to see this i was trying to get info on schizophrenia because my boyfreinds dad has it. I wasnt looking for people who had these types of problems. If you want to keep you title the same thats your business. Don't get mad i'm just telling u the truth.

[SchizoStephanie]

Yes, where you said in 1:50, that you want to sleep it away. But just be happy you can go to sleep, especially without having nightmares, even while your awake. Im schizophrenic by the way. And for the pple who dont know the song is schizophrenic or something like that I read it in a comment. That is y she made it title like that. But anyway, keep ur head up I know its hard to but just do it. Sadness will pass, and u get more but they pass too. Its just there because we have to deal with it. 8^)

[drinkyourtea]

this sounds more like anorexia than schizophrenia

[CartmanLandZ]

Go to the doctor u can be cured

skitso something else believe me more fucked up then u

[nanasound]

Foo Fighters's song ?

[verybadsuzy]

i wish u girls the very best.

[OTHERRRRRx]

what the hell does this have to do with schizophrenia besides the song?...

[WorkingClassMachine]

FUGEE-O BREAK!

[PNHassett]

What?

These are they symptoms of Borderline Personality Disorder. It's symptoms of being abused by people and society.

[stealthis]

This has a totally wrong title.

[TacoLuvr]

Schizophrenia is an eating disorder? When did that happen? And why didn't the voices in my head tell me about it before now?

[MorbidHunger]

um thats the name of the song...and no the song isnt about schizophrenia either its describing the type of conversation he's having with himself

[TacoLuvr]

Wow, that's weird. I don't even remember making that first comment. Maybe somebody else made it. Well, it wasn't me if that is what you are trying to imply. Oh no, I wasn't trying to imply that. I wasn't even talking about you. Oh, that's good, because didn't do it either. Well, neither did I. Hey okay guys, be quiet for a minute. I am trying to concentrate and write this comment. Oh yeah, good one. Since when are you able to concentrate? Oh, shut up!!

[boggleH]

That is not schizophrenia either.

[DeathBeforeDefeat]

You dumbass.

[talktoyourself]

lol you guys are terrible, i know how that girl feels tho, it isn't fun.

[JAD3NY]

This made me sad because it's true for a lot. The second it comes on, and you know how to control it won't go away easily. I want everyone in the world with these issues to be saved. It's sad that we most likely won't be. Or that it will be too late before anything can be done.

[lollymanson]

Lynnieburd, you are SICK!!! Try starving yourself just for a week and we`ll see how happy you`ll be. With no pleasure of food there is no happiness... Even if you`re skinny... You know you`re dying

[wikidassklown15]

if people cant accept me for me then their not for me-a wise fool

[Lynnieburd]

I never really understood how anorexics can be depressed..i think the only reason they're depressed is low blood sugar because..in todays society being skinny...even sickly skinny is what every guy wants and every girl..so they have this ''perfection'' you should be happy with it..when you're thin everyone loves you..simple as that..so why be depressed? should be happy..try being fat for once.

[Ealasaid17]

I was never depressed when I was anorexic, I loved it. my anorexic years was the happiest years of my life, I often wonder what happened. I recovered that's what happened I guess. LOL

[Lynnieburd]

heehhe....see...

[blondejokes92]

anorexia doesnt have anything 2 do with depression. yeah, often depression develops with it, bt they rnt necessarily connected. i think, at least 4 afew cases i know of, its cos people r not comfortable in themselves n feel they need 2 change 2 make it better. anorexia is just relating this to skinniness. loads of other things can cum frm it.

people are depressed frm the selfconsciousness, not the anorexia. if anything, it makes em feel better because they feel they r doing sumthing about it.x

[davoisakoollord]

by maintaining this view, you will never find happyness,you have been warned

[LucyShy]

Basically, it's when you start out over/normal weight, and you convince yourself completely that you will be 'happy when you are thin'. Then you get 'thin'. You aren't happy. You're exactly the same except you're half mental with fear and panic over numbers and food. And your social life's f*cked up. And your works gone to shit. And everyone thinks you're mental.

That's how ppl get depressed.

[Monirockandroll]

Lynnieburb: They are depress cuz they cuz they dont asept themselves, they wanna be skiny cuz they think that they are fat, and how woukd you feel if all your body is a mess? with your self-esteem very low right?

[Lynnieburd]

You don't understand i do hate myself because i AM actually fat..or what america would be considered fat... about 160 and i'm 5'5''...so my point is...if i was thin like them with all the guys after me and in love with me JUST for the very fact i'm skinny and no regards to my personalty....i wouldn't be wasting my time being depressed i'd be happy and SO glad to be that way...that's all i'm saying.

[Monirockandroll]

ok, but, the thing is that in our days society only wants to see thin and 'pretty' girls, and that pressure is in the back of all that young ppl, and its not simple .-.

[Lynnieburd]

yeah i know,..but if you're thin..especially thinner than most girls..you should be happy that's all i can say..if i was thin like that and everyones loved me because i was thin...i'd be happy...

[Ninsgreat]

listen to the both of yas, people are always going to think there to fat, people will look for attention, people will not want to eat because of that, THERE choice, let them ruin there bodies,people who do this to themselves are DISCUSTING looking, bones sticking out, no tits or ass, dosent matter if there pretty there faces always look drawn and washed out, if ya wana look like that then by all means knock yourself out . . .

[Lynnieburd]

trust me...the guys like the anorexic chicks..99% of guys do trust me..the ones you'e talking about are the ones that are almost dead...and close to death...they're at the end of the rope...but..most guys think anorexic and bulemic girls who are not close to death yet are hot and think they'e healthy and just take care of themself when it's the opposite

[simplyjbr]

No no no... trust ME, 99% of guys do not like the anorexic chicks. I was a naturally slender girl, and I still got critiqued by men for being too skinny, and I was no where near anorexic. Men like curves, it's what makes a woman look womanly.

[CryingSmiles]

Morb, like, none of them are there anymore =/

Where's Jess gone?? & you... You're missing too. =[

x

[MorbidHunger]

I've been in the hospital for the past 2 weeks. I had severe alcohol poisoning so it wasnt planned so I didnt post in the going away section but I did post about what happened in the Mental Health section.

[MeowMixCunt]

lol

[frizzbug]

I always hate comments like the last one. It's self mutilation, like you said. Completely different. I feel for those people whose words you used - and I am right there with them. Best of luck and awesome job.

[p8ball4life]

Ok, how many times do we have to tell you idiots. You use the razor to cut across not up your arm. That should help you get the job done next time.

[MorbidHunger]

it wasn't a suicide attempt, idiot. Self-Mutilation is not equal to suicidal ideation.

[phubbie1]

actully your the only way you are going to kill your self by slitting your wrists is cutting down not across and even then the likly hood you will die is sooo low there is no point even trying all you end up with is a nasty scare

[ikilledfluffy]

p8ball4life--Man, that's pretty sad that you have nothing better to do but troll people's videos. Maybe you should, oh I don't know, read a book.

[AllSaintsAngel]

your a real idiot and need to get a life

[redeemerMC]

its spelled schizoprenia and this has nothing to do with it really

[ikilledfluffy]

to redeemerMC--The song is called "Schizophrenic Conversations", and it's by Staind. Look up the lyrics to the song, and watch this video again. This video is NOT about schizophrenia, and she's well aware of that fact, because um duh, she made the video. I hope you don't take things this literally in your everyday life....

[ikilledfluffy]

Oh and by the way, while trying to correct her spelling, you too, my friend, spelled it wrong. Smooth.

[jennaparker]

Actually schizophrenic here is being used as an adjective to describe the type of conversation.

[DemonosZXZ]

hah stay away from those nazi fuck doctors you know would your real problem is it's that you have a mind and try to use unlike a drone and people hate that because you can go outside the lines thats what mental health is for your brand of slavery find the injustice and you'll find the cure never loss your voice.

[babycee303]

cuttin urself is fucked up big time

[MorbidHunger]

a lot of things are fucked up, rape, murder, testing on animals...but it still goes on. You just ave to accept it.

[quagmire1027]

well the first picture did anyway

[quagmire1027]

u look like weird al

[glitched18x]

you sound like you might have Obsessive-compulsive disorder too because like you said, you ate in groups of eight, etc.

[MorbidHunger]

Thats not OCD although I can see why you would think so. When someone has an ED they make up these rituals around food and eating. that are more about remaining in control and not going off on a binge. Its not at all for the same reasons somone with OCD develops rituals (they do it almost out of a superstitious fear, more to calm worries and general anxiety)

[benelson1]

if you really want change, try visiting this site, it really helped me...

clinical-depression

dot co dot uk

hope it inspires you a little bit

good luck

xxx

[MorbidHunger]

Thanks but the website doesnt work

[benelson1]

it doesnt work at all or is it just a bit jumbled?

if its just a bit jumbled click on depression information.

if it doesnt work, hmmm thats annoying, but im sure there are other sites that will help you. if you understand your depression your a thousand times more likely to be able to treat it.

Or you could see your doctor for advice on counselling and/or medication.

i really would reccomend it honey,

good luck

[MorbidHunger]

I was diagnosed at 14 with Severe Recurrent Major Depressive Disorder without Psychotic Features..in December 2006 when I was 19 it was changed to with Psychosis...I've been on more medications than I can count or even remember. I've had 7 therapists, 3 Hospitalization 2 of them just this year. So far nothing has helped..but theres always Electro Convulsive Therapy.

[peacemtn]

Your life is more important. Beauty comes from within. Things freeze to death. Be sure to keep warm and love yourself. No one can do it for you. Good luck.

[gothtard85]

it gets better when u start eating. and u get happier...woooow....yeeessss..­.the joy on not looking like a stick

[MorbidHunger]

yeah thats all great and everything but if you noticed most of those girls weren't "sticks"...so what about those of us who are thin/normal weight or overweight...we just dont get taken seriously....

[CryingSmiles]

This is amazing morb. I haven't seen most of those people on the boards for a long time. *Wonders how they all are doing*. Take care hun, May <3 [xxSilentScreams]

[MissTicRayne]

OMG morbid this is SO fucking awesome! I dont know if you remember me, havent been on the board in a year, but tell everyone (manders+magenta specially) i love and miss them. I pray for you all <3 MysticalBlade

[Tinypuppies2]

l wish you and many many toehrs suffereing well sorry for your pain,

[LucilleBallnumber1]

Why can't I see this video?

[Airsoftsniper01]

this made me almost cry...

[NeonStuddBelt]

i love this video. the messages in it are powerful. i can relate very much. thanks for making this video. i watch it all the time. it still makes my eyes watery, knowing im not alone.

[morningstarrr]

why the hell is this titled 'schizophrenic conversations'..this has nothing to do with schizophrenia. it should be titled "my self destruction video" considering the fact that its about self injury (cutting also) AND YOU CANT EVEN SPELL SCHIZOPHRENIA, so obviously you dont have it and have no right to post it on the topic of a ED/self-injury video. please learn your disorders before you post about it =]

[mcfly9876]

Erm, Schizophrenic Conversations is the name of the song...by Stanid.

[morningstarrr]

and how does schizophrenia relate to eating disorders? it doesnt. so the song is irrelevant.

[ErinnBrewer]

Have you ever suffered from an ED, if so, then you would probably get the relation, both are illness dealing with uncontrolable anxiety(sp?), paranoia and fear.  In fact many people who suffer severely from an ED are also diagnosed with schizophrenia, the feelings one goes through are very similar

[morningstarrr]

any illness can cause anxiety and fear. and linking an ED to schizophrenia just, doesnt work. there is very little connection between the two, they barely relate.

[ErinnBrewer]

Well that is just one miniscule opinion now isn't it? One of my friends has been diagnosed with schizophrenia, several with anorexia, and I have an ED, after many conversations with them, my opinion is that the feelings are very similar, including feelings of being closed in and loss of control. Her opinion is not irrelevant simply because it is not your opinion.

[morningstarrr]

its not something to be opinionated on dumb shit, its a fact. now shut your damn mouth because you really have no clue what you're talking about. dont link random things. k? idiot.

[mcfly9876]

Hey, I used to member of that site, hopefully when I get my own computer i'll be able to come back...

But wow, such an amazing, powerful video. I could relate to so many of the quotes.

I recognized so many of you from the site, you're all so beautiful.

Take care!

-Holly xxx

[best8ever]

recognise so much of that in me. i just keep remembering good days and hope to get back to my old self

[myartisfashion]

Are those your journal entries? If so, we have a similar style of things we write about related to our E.D.

[MorbidHunger]

No They are qoutes from posts, poems, public journals of my freinds. A few qoutes in there are mine from letters I have written to a freind.

[kirsty10210]

wat does EDNOS stand for?

[Dazzlingly]

Eating Disorder Not Otherwise Specified

[sweeteuphoria4430]

Amazing--your video is very touching. The song choice, photos, and quotes are very appropriate. Best of luck.

[aciddiscopop66]

beautiful words my dear. you are very brave, god be with you. all my love xxxx

[rino282828]

oh god! hunny, you're beautiful! i always wonder why people do this! (actually I know why, cause i started studying ED's and stuff like that, in the Netherlands.) but still, it's a really weird dissease! I hope you're already better, or that you're getting better, cause you are pretty!

[MorbidHunger]

but you dont even know what I look like, to say whether Im pretty or not. Although I appreciate the complement nonetheless.

And Im not in Recovery.

Sorry.

[NeonStuddBelt]

oh haha the name of the song is Schitzophrenic Conversations. I love the band Staind. this is a great song.

[NeonStuddBelt]

great video. the quotes are so true. what is the name of the song?

[SaxPlaya86]

amazing... thank you for sharing this :) btw, this is Duncan haha... different screenname on here

[ambernc]

Amazing video! Thank you for sharing it.

[deathsmiled]

Thank you for making this!

[mindylootoo]

i loved it as well! The images were very moving, the choice of song fitting. It kept me intensely watching. Thank you for sharing that with me.

[herolessgirl]

I love the music and the quotes. Video is really powerful and an eye opener to some I'm sure. Its funny, the quote just before my picture.. I thought "thats what I think too".