Added: 3 years ago
From: HauntedFlower
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  • we want to to pump... u up. lol

  • bogussss

  • Although its mostly the mans fault they did an great job of portraying the typical money grubbing western woman. How are condoms and women alike? If there not on your dick there in your wallet.

  • I blame the bitch....she keeps whining about his appearance and never tells him up front and honest that she wants financial security

  • he should've invested into the housing market before... that would take care of it

  • see, shouldn't of said your were poor at the beginning

  • why people say "the bitch". the guy is the stupid one !!

  • why didnt he just do to hans what he did to the gang 30 seconds prior to that old bastard laughing at him.

  • I would really argue Linda was not worth wasting $6 million on...talk about a bitch...

  • And the moral of the story: never change yourself in order to gain the love of others. Moral of the story part 2: old men need to stop chasing after women way too young for them.

  • Find another chick dude

  • Linda is a stupid bitch

  • Ive been watching epsiodes back 2 back and its always the bitches whose doin the lieing and deceiving lmao

  • Tales From the Crypt presents: The Bitch

  • Wow people, this is not shakespeare work were talking about. Arnold directed the freaking episode, I don't think a deep analysis of the story is required

  • @LukeXiang

    Oooh, someone enjoys being a judgmental Janice, don't they? What, you need a daily boost of self-righteousness to get through your day?

  • I fuckn new it was gona end like that \.. what ah sucker

  • kinda sad

  • I love the ending i wish this was still on

  • fucking hanz!

  • Fuck you Hanz!

  • Now I aint saying she a Gold Digger...

  • at the end i wanted carlton to like choke hanse to death or something then take the wine glass that the butler had and shank the butler with it, then rape the woman... HELLZ YEYUH

  • 5:04 is just rediculous

  • lol i love that voice on that body

  • The thing that pissed me off about this episode is that she could of told the old guy she wanted someone to take care of her financially or whatever and the old guy could of done it from the start with all that money he had; but all she was talking/worried about was the looks and how old he was. Out of nowhere she marries the same old fucking guy she was saying no to at the beginning because of money. He put himself in the situation but that chick really pissed me off. Lol, its fucked up xD

  • The actor who played Hans / the young guy is gorgeous.

  • Carlton's a fucking pathetic loser. Fucking oneitis piece of shit couldn't have just moved on?? No, he has oneitits for ONE girl when theres a billion girls in the world. Jesus....

  • @DaZ316x

    ermmmm hello ??? calm down.... it's a fictional story. Which means it's not real and logic does not need apply!

    no need for a hissy fit.

  • That doctor is a modern age genius!

  • The way I see it the old man still got the better end. The brains that got him rich will make him Rich again or at-least give a decent living. And escaped that horrible gold digger.

  • @Sazad93 Well the chemistry inside of him from "what I got the mad scientist" may have stayed the same. Meaning his heart, stomach, brains, kidneys, etc are all still his "true age". Meaning something will go wrong internally soon and take his life.

  • @Jopo1226 Did you see him lifting those wieghts? With an Old man's heart and lugs he would have had a heart attack. Kidneys,Stomach GIT am sure the mad scientist can replace if he was able to replace all of the skin without the need of immuno suppressors, Only Problem I would see is with his brain Atrophying over time, but his brain is still more useful then the other's.

  • @Sazad93 erm arnold directed this not james cameron or peter freakin jackson. If u want to watching something thats thought provokin and that makes sense go watch csi

  • @dweem2009able Hehe I was just having a bit of fun "Creating a what if it was real story" Just some harmless trolling.

  • Why didn't the old man see it coming? A young face with an old body is just... freaky. Yet when he changed the torso, I instantly knew his legs would come up. Why didn't he have an entire body change from the start? I'm guessing he got too old to care or had senility or something.

  • When i saw Hans I just started laughing my ass off.

  • well I'd swap old age and wealth for youth and poverty any time... (well in case I ever get old and rich that is...)

  • @stikowsky well, you'll get old eventually...as for the money......

  • you know what i could've done to that kinda girl? I'll switch to Chuck and cramped the blonde of her

  • a guy with a body like that and a voice like that...woah

  • doesnt make sense at all Linda knew he was rich at the very start so wtf ?

  • @larzarus1234 Actually he didn't tell Linda he was rich cause she wanted her to love him for what he was :P

  • and the butler too.. oh hell no this has gone too far! lol, this was definitely one of the more memorable episodes growing up.. never gets old.

  • i wudve jus switched my penis only... fuck the legz

  • EXCELLENT TALE

  • i'm i the only one who would have killed every one in the room?

  • fuck linda indeed

  • good show

  • of corce women just want money

  • his voice lol

  • Well I guess the butler was never really his friend either8B. Kinda strange how he just acted like Carlton never existed

  • @Moonstone2732 I know, right!!! They were all in it-bastards-LOL!!!

  • BRONIES BEFORE HONIES

  • that's why American girls are stupid whores who can't find a man to marry for the life of them! you won't see that shit in a poor country! spoiled ass bitches lol

  • @Hatethehater hey im american and i aint no gold digger and stupid linda u might have married for gold but look at the saggy raisin u left with yuck and besides he get over it and find i gud woman who will love him for his health u can always earn a fortune but u cant ur health

  • @freecherokeespirit I no talk gud engish to. U be frinds?

  • @jespersschmidt sure ill be friends with u ;p

  • @Hatethehater Hey not all american girls are golddiggers. A besides there are as many goldidgger european women probably as their are american. Its not the country its the WOMAN. Linda wasn't any kind of good person, it showed her character

  • why would he give up ALL his money?! stupid old man

  • @nikitty020 He was a very dumb old man who thought someone loved him. Thats why8B. But really she was just a common golddigger

  • I remember getting a boner from this when I was a kid.

  • Nice ass!!

  • Have fun licking is saggy balls, Linda-LOL!!!

  • "Oh God, Linda won't you ever be satisfied?" said the weird old guy. "I know what I want and you just don't have it!" said the gold digger-LOL!!!!! Stupid.

  • omg, that bitch, talk about slap in the face, i would've been majorly pissed

  • What people would do for someone's affection....

  • Despite the fact she wanted someone to "take care of her", I still don't put any blame on her or even consider her a gold-digger in the strictest sense of the word. She was always up-front with Carlton about not wanting him and why and never deceived him or demanded anything of him (in fact, she was horrified initially). He just kept pushing the issue until he bled himself dry. He deceived himself and any blame should be on his shoulders, not hers. Sorry.

  • @nobodyhome2222 Don't say sorry, you're right! I used to be like that and lost thousands.

  • @nobodyhome2222 holy shit you really got into this one

  • @Trollmydick I overanalyze everything xD Haha

  • Comment removed

  • @nobodyhome2222 wtf is wrong w/ you? she is the definition of a gold digger and even though she was supposedly "up-front" about not wanting him she is still a terrible terrible person who wanted to marry for money cus apparently she can over look his old face and decrepit body if all she sees is money in front of her eyes and jewels hanging off of everything from her

  • @LukeXiang Ugh, you're still going on about this? It was like, months and months ago, I'm bored with it now. Here, go look at something fun: maddox.xmission.com/

  • Nice butt!!

  • this doesnt make any sense. she just married the same man. if shes going to be digger at least have it make sense. and yes thats actually a happy ending

  • awesome upload!

  • with that body he can just start modeling! i'm pretty sure he'll get rich again, and with that body, surely some girl will fuck him

  • Happy ending imo

    

  • How could he still have voice like that when he got new body.he kept the neck?:D

  • booty butt booty butt booty butt cheeks!!! lol

  • God I love Tales from the Crypt..

  • @1imesub it used 2 scare the shit out of me when i was a kid. now that i'm an adult, i realized that some episodes r REALLY scary and others r not.

  • LOL Love how the doctor is constantly slicing salami while explaining why Carleton's new dick will cost an extra million bucks.

  • man he could got another girl i dont know he tripping thou

  • i saw the end coming since the start

  • Linda we all knew she was a bitch from the beginning but hey guess what the retarded guy will soon die of being in an old body and the old guy will get ALOT of POON TANG XD

  • He could've used Viagra seriously I MEAN IT

  • All that money for a bit of c**t?

    Mug got all he deserved...

  • rich is 6million dollars? not in this decade

  • @Bovoid5 in this decade how much money do you need to be rich??

  • @Distrub122334 simple: Asian rich: $5 Million

    American Rich: $20 Million

    Arab Rich: $80 Million

    Me Rich: $3 Million because that is basically how much i will earn by the time i retire lol from working at 25 til 65 :(

  • Linda was a biotch! I hope she enjoys her new husband's OLD BALLS!!

  • Moral of the story is money nor looks can buy true love. That goldigger just wanted money from the start.

  • the only problem with this is his brain still ages.

  • WTF a tales from the crypt episode with no death? am i the only one surprised by that?entertaining regarless.

  • Well if hes as rich as he is then $6 million shouldnt break him. It wouldnt break Huge Hefner or Donald Trump.

  • @dominican5683 he ran out of money,his butler left and he lost the house. weren't you paying attention?

  • Fuck This Slutty Ass Fake Gold Diggin Bitch

  • DAMN 4:08 I'd hit lol what a hottie with a body

  • @Kourtney305 ikr. The ass is on point.

  • This seems to be scarier than Benjamin Button

  • LOOOOOOOOOOOOL, sucks to be him, goes through all that work to be the man of her dreams, but he already was! how ironic.

  • unlucky

  • kelly preston had to be one the hottest women of all time!

  • The girl just can't make up her mind

  • The body of a thirty year old and the mind of an old financial wizard, he'll make the money back in no time, find another girl better then Linda and be happier for it. Unless of course, he forgot to take care of his organs, heart, liver, lungs, etc. That could get messy for him.

  • cool!!!!!  THE CRYPT KEEPER FINALLY KILLED THE TERMINATOR

  • well he has a young body now and is athletic. He can also kick ass so why not make even more money by joining UFC. He'll win the chick back and many more lol.

  • 4:54 OMG! The blond punk is Jacob from LOST!!!!

  • "Life is cumplicated" Yo Niko Bellic

  • Omg...BURN! :D

  • gold diggin whore,she wasnt even hot,avverage at best....i woulda just killed the bitch and dumped her body in a very shallow grave!i guess men will stop at nothin to get into some skanks pants...

  • hans has a nice set of teeth do hahahaha

  • Well this episode was a waste of my time...

  • This is a brilliant episode. Not only does it show than none of can cheat death no matter how much money you have it also shows you can never please women... except if you're ritch.

  • I woulda just moved someplace cold so I could wear pants all the time, until it was too late for the girl. Lol. And I coulda done without the man ass shot.

  • BITCH!

  • This episode is pretty ridiculous, not one of my favorites...but it does give a pretty realistic portrayal of women and teaches 2 lessons.1-Women don't know what the hell they want, so don't try to change what you are to impress them. 2-If a girl doesn't like you...tell her to go chase a parked car and find someone else that does. Don't obsess.

  • And the lesson is.... always tell shallow bitches your rich, money will get you more pussy than looks.

  • well....i dunno, it depends on which is worth more to you. some dudes would gladly exchanged 30yrs of thier life for 6million. they probably figure it would've been 30yrs of a boring life sturggling to make ends meet. -and even then life isn't guranteed 'cause you could die tomorrow, might as well be rich before you go!!

  • 1st that bitch complained about his face, then wanted money, n still had the same face.. dumb bitch.. this was a stupid episode!

  • @559131313 He never told her how much money he had, remember the beginning.

  • @Slayertwentytwo oh.. sounds right. . u got a point. .lol

  • Shallow Bitch

  • One of my favorite episodes ever! ;)

  • lol@ her dissing his legs...hahaha

  • lol...hes still walking like an old man on the beach. btw that old man had more money than sense, what a fool..

  • 2:04 what is he eating?

  • @stone655 He´s eating salami.

  • 6:48

    Dude needs to floss.

  • 6 million dollars isn't much at all.....

  • What an idiot if he really wanted her that bad he should of just told her he was rich in the first place

  • I was waiting for his dentures to fall out.

  • I remember this episode...but the moral lesson doesn't show

  • what a bitch, and what an idot !!

  • how is a fucking torso transplant possible, it just makes no sense whatsoever... you cut off the head and limbs and reattach them to another torso? thats ridiculous

  • @MikeTupperTheKiller most of the episodes on this show are not realistic. duh. thats the point of the whole damn show & series. to be creepy and twisted. you ever see a talking corpse in real life?

  • you know what i think the old guy just got hustled out of 6million dollars

  • the way he looks now he can get any women he wants....fuck linda

  • it would been messed-up if he got sum pussy from her an its not even good. (dont knock it till you try it lol)

  • @15551cue Linda:"So how was it?" Old dude: "Meh.."

  • At this point I would have told this bitch to fk off...Like she won't ever get old...

  • He should go after the chick after the old guy dies, which should be pretty soon... LOL

  • He should have falcon punched hans in his head, Since his so old he would've died. Boom, She's widowed..

  • He could have saved 1 million on one "limb" and just bought Viagra

  • Nice ass!

  • lol :D Thanks for uploading these !!!

  • she is a Witch

  • linda u fucken whoreeee

  • now its legs with this bitch.......god can somebody just kill her alreedy....

  • i grew up watching this ..

  • he considered himslf so rich nd all he had was 6 million dollars??

  • Anyone else want a ride?

  • woah creepy. haha but thats some fucked up shit

  • If I was an old man in my 80's I'd happily give most of my money away to be young again! thats a great deal!! The moral of this episode doesn't quite show through

  • @rabguk Maybe it's plastic surgery is rediculus?

  • Comment removed

  • this wasnt scary

  • aww man what the hell i saw that coming aww man!!!!!!

  • Linda = Shallow bitch.

    Carlton = Shallow dumbass.

    Arnold = Awesome actor and director. And what a hot ass.

  • This is so funny; what a classic !!! I think the plastic surgeon, Hans, the girl the butler, and were somehow working together on this scam to get the old man's fortune. Besides the old guy was my acting teacher, who loved his students like they were his own children. RIP William Hickey, you are the BEST!!!

  • Poor guy...I feel so bad for him! 

  • wow shes ungreatfull :/

  • motherfucker still got a rolls royce... thats good for couple of hundred of thous...

  • "anybody else wanna ride" ...lmao

  • oh shit she's a gold digga! - just thought you should know nigga

  • I'd say the old guy still came out ahead in the end. Now he has a young body and he probably added 60 years to his life. Isn't 60 more years of life worth a few million dollars? Now he has good looks and plenty of time to make more money and find a new girl. He didn't want the original girl anyways if she was only interested in money. And Hans will be dead soon with that old body.

  • @ChaosRocket Maybe his organs weren't replaced.

  • @ChaosRocket his outer body was changed. He still got the organs of an old person.

  • @ChaosRocket - I don't think so cause the organs inside were not changed right?? hans the organs of the old man and the old man has hans' young organs. oops!

  • @ChaosRocket always see the positive in everything.

  • shallow bitch

  • Well look on the bright Side, u got a bangin body, but No Money, Hahahahahaha wait thoer is no bright side ??!!!:) LOl

  • the background score is really good at the end dont you think? very sad and haunting.

  • i expect that kind of behavior from the bitch but I woulda beat the shit outta that bitch ass nigga fulton!

  • why was i so afraid of this show when i was a kid ?? LOL ..