Great Pick-Up Lines in the Bible

[TheBrian9210]

JOE!

[GuidesForPures]

Last Abraham was hilarious

[Adayum27]

after a few google searches, I now find this funny.

[AdmiralDarumeshian]

i defenetly want to have Mose's powers

[allcapsnorage]

wanna bet my last names the baptist

[Denamic]

Took me a few seconds to get the last one, but when I did, it made me go "HA!"

[Paigexxx16]

WHAT THE FUCK!

[mxbcole14]

This is almost offensive... xD

[AwesomeMenFilms]

ive been looking for this all night

[Turbolaag25]

The advert that came on before I watched this video was about mormons.

[merrington1996]

moses

[ACAVYOS]

yeah abraham just killed me xD

[Xylian113]

Abraham one is just so hilarious.. :D

[12gage22]

sill freaking love this, but if that's a problem.

[marymjc]

Adam - Wanna bone?

Girl - Okay!

Adam - :D

[DrTrollable]

abraham was the best one

[KickAsstronaut]

ewwww he parted her red sea...

[mooman62]

"but if that's a problem...." hahaha!

[Peashe228]

Abraham was so funny!!

[xxsamplextextxx]

so her new name when they get married would be the laptist the baptist? 

[Stenfeldt111]

Epicface 1:26

[The2ndOohCullen]

'Hey, baby, I'm gifted in tongues...'

[theZ0g]

Had to watch each of these a couple times- got distracted by the girl the first few times <3

[whiTeDAlow]

guy at 0:12 looks little like that guy from Bones ... :P

[SecondA7XHeartbeat]

Adam- took me 10 full seconds to get...... then laughed hysterically.

[OwnerOfOwn]

you guys are going to hell... but it was hilarious

[TinnedWaffles]

lol i love jokes about abraham. that crazy foo

[chrisduncanaudio]

Abraham, such a playa.

[TheSlash7]

anybody else get extremely interested in the 17 minute add and watch the whole thing?

[lavatahir]

haha abraham

[Unumbium]

LOLOLOL ABRAHAM.

[raraory1]

not funny at all, now what kind of car did God drive? he drove Adam and Eve out of the garden in a Fury,

[kevin63216]

wanna bone okay :D

[19dude86]

hahah Adam is the best!!!

[awesomeness22351]

I don't get the holy spirit joke

[superman32101]

@awesomeness22351 It's a play on the Virgin Mary, mother of Jesus, who was conceived by the Holy Spirit.

[ChadTTG2]

Omg she's so pretty

[riseofthefallen301]

See, everybody know Eddie Veder is better than Jesus!

[CodeCosmo]

I don't get the last one.

[Envaldig]

@CodeCosmo Abraham was told to kill his son Isaac by God but in the last second God said JustkiddingLOL. If you want the real version googlesearch: Binding of Isaac.

[nadavga]

@CodeCosmo Abraham had his faith tested by God, who asked him to sacrifice his son. He was about to do it too, but an angel stopped him at the last second saying that he passed

[figureLP09]

@CodeCosmo Abraham had to kill his son because God asked him so in the Bible (Weird, huh?), so that´s the reason of the joke.

[CodeCosmo]

@figureLP09 ohhh, haha. That is weird. Thank you!

[samsthemank]

@figureLP09 He didn't kill Isaac, it was a test.

[figureLP09]

@samsthemank Rly? Sorry, I´m not actually christian so I don´t know the facts that well :S

[axe251]

PLEASE MAKE MORE OF THESE!

they are awsome

[ZehEduardo]

I don't get Abraham's joke...

[originaldeviltongue]

@ZehEduardo God asked Abraham to kill his own son. So Abe climbed to the top of a mountain and just as he was about to stab this little kid in the heart, God hopped out from behind the clouds and was all like "LOL TROLLED U!"

Moral of the story: God is a dick.

[TheHague67]

@ZehEduardo Abraham was going to sacrifice his son to God. I forget why.

[frankvonfrauner]

He parted the red sea... parted her legs.... she was clearly on her period.

Fuck it, she's hot. I'd let her bleed on my face.

[ZENUDIE]

@frankvonfrauner ...the red sea isnt blood... its just normal water... are you an idiot?

[frankvonfrauner]

@ZENUDIE It was a joke you asshat.

You were born without a sense of humour. You're a fucking dullard.

[ZENUDIE]

@frankvonfrauner yes I'm aware its a joke, but I'm just saying, the red sea contained no blood, which makes the reason behind your joke null.

[frankvonfrauner]

@ZENUDIE shut up stupid. You're humiliating yourself.  You don't understand funny, that's fine, some people are just born to be duds.

You corrected someone on a video of biblical figures hitting on people in a 21st century bar. Do you really think I thought there was a fucking sea of blood somewhere on earth? I'm not religious, I don't believe in idiotic things like that, god and the bible.

[ZENUDIE]

@frankvonfrauner ouch... i... i just thought you were mistaken or something, i dont know... you didnt need to explode, i was just trying to help.

[PNOYboy9515]

abraham the 100 year old dude who still has it

[ryanman658]

It must have been at that time of the month if Moses parted the red sea...

[AndrewQuo]

HAHAHA ABRAHAM 

[straightAswag]

I first clicked these videos for the girl thumbnail. then, i clicked for the rest because I knew they'd be funny too. Now i watch them again for melissa.

[UDNTKNWHOOIAM]

1:26 I want to know how to make that face...

[Crixilius]

I only just now got the Holy Spirit one.

[FlyingPaladin617]

Lucifer!!

[whenducksgobad]

The Moses one is hilariousXD 

[KindaFlush96]

Lulz

[MugMan16]

cracka

[nadavga]

Want a bone? AHAHAHAHA!!!!

[sportsnut277]

@nadavga fail...?

[RookieReality]

the laptist the baptist :D

[RandomHiMfan]

last one was PRICELESS

[theazn07]

what did he do at 1:16? i don't get it...

[AsianTaeHyun]

@theazn07 Yeah it's kind of weird.

Why would the Holy Spirit impregnate someone?

And... how...?

[theazn07]

@AsianTaeHyun ohhh haha he impregnated her XD lol wow im slow

[metaitachi]

@AsianTaeHyun Because in the bible, the holy spirit impregnated Mary who is a virgin.

[ArmstrongDickpuncify]

Daniel makes her panties catch fire.

[alessando97000]

adam is the best

[123pixieboo]

Moses made me laugh so hard XD

[JammyFootball]

moses made me laugh so hard

[blmh1959]

abraham was just...horrible hahaha but very funny

[Biskmut]

Abraham is the best.

[MTGandP]

The last one was by far the best.

[RickhatesScott]

That head bob Abraham does is magical

[carlcarlos101]

That fake white beard is a PERFECT blend with his hair.

[Deiji]

Hur hur Christian humor

[79guitarherofreak]

i was going to pause the video and accidently hit the dislike button and now i feel like crap...

[NancyPelosi96]

I like the God one!

[Richy2Trickie]

Third time watching this vid

Now I get the holy spirit part

F***ed up the holy spirit made her pregnant like the virgin Mary

But I still like this video

Hahaha

[malslimbo]

I didn't get the part of the holy spirit D:

[lockenanky]

@malslimbo what!? That is the best part: He mades her pregnant without having sex with her like he did with Maria. So for him there's no need to have sex with her :D

[kyubikyu]

@malslimbo the holy spirit got her pregnant just with that pointing he did and pregnant women can't drink

[malslimbo]

@kyubikyu Ah thanks xD

[MyC0ks]

@malslimbo A second jesus was made

[isucch]

adam: wanna bone?

girl: okayy

adam: :D

i lost it at that part hahahahahaha

[jpell13]

lmao "are you eddie vedder?!"

[Alecstutes]

OMG!!!! Everybody look up "Hipster Steve Has A Cocaine Problem"!!! Its the most HILARIOUS freakin video EVER!!!! BTW he loves jesus haha!!!

[Poogoblin18]

I hate it when the top comment says a punch-line and you anticipate it for the whole video. Douche bag.

[Bergman000]

@Poogoblin18 Want a bone ?

[kex926]

1:22 from on has to be the best parts.

[isucch]

what i learned from pick-up lines

she has boned in every single century

the bar only lets the best of the best in

[MrWhiteWolf1983]

That was pretty stupid. I want my 1:38 back............bastards.

[EthalaTheBurdened]

@MrWhiteWolf1983 invest in better taste in captain bland's monotonous comedy then :) Cause B&B would not be my firrst choice.

[xOniDotx]

just got the wanna bone line! xD

[HotSausageStealer]

Fuck, I want to go to one of theses parties.

[thedonnycrew]

The sound of the Holy Spirit impregnating the woman is the sound of Agent 9 shooting his ray gun on Spyro: Year of the Dragon

[timmybinatree]

Who else does the Abraham head jerks along with him?

[WDFF5]

Abraham actually had two kids... sorry to be the one to say it, but it's true :P

[Jzscrstsprstr]

I'm not sure they thought the "red sea" joke through...

[BloodHunter177]

@tutu1987 if he's Eddie Vetter

[wjb2580]

Love it, subscribed!

[tutu1987]

what is she asking from jesus?

[imlolkittens]

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[TheCoopacalypse]

1:24 rape face or epic face u decide

[mrsingobarongs]

۩۞۩ SINGOBARONGS ۩۞۩

[milliondollaroptions]

This whole video was ridiculus, retarted, outlandish, tacky, and it made me laugh.

[manxhedghog]

I got all of these but the holy spirit one. What does it mean, particularly the drink.

[27phillyflyers]

@manxhedghog he makes her pregnant, and ur not supposed to drink when ur pregnant. ya know, like how the holy spirit gave mary a baby even though she hadnt had sex.

[manxhedghog]

@27phillyflyers oooh, now I feel stupid. thanks lol

[27phillyflyers]

@manxhedghog no praaaaabb bro

[Aasriian]

@manxhedghog He impregnated her. He told her not to drink because it would harm the immaculate conception.

[lolsebasstian]

@Aasriian how fucked up would that be? the son of god with fetal alcohol syndrome? hahaha

[rushspider]

Lol. His hand movements after he says but if that's a problem.

[Gamerman534]

wow, the girl just gets hotter and hotter...

[zergkiller007]

What is the song/music you used for the cut-scenes? Where could i find it? or did you make it?

[Faustustopheles]

wow. i actually didn't get some of these. i'll have to watch them over and over until i do. still very funny!

[zergkiller007]

@Faustustopheles Like what ones?

[Roffeskanal]

Eddy who?

[mellamosean]

@Roffeskanal

pearl jam

[DroidRocks123]

Then the womans namee would be The Laptist The Baptist

[1201pinkfloydian1232]

Adam's face at 1:25 cracks me up! haha

[uniquekeanu]

Adam has swag... nuff said.

[Freaksoftheinternet]

hahaha abraham.

[hannahlova23]

????

[onnrc]

thumbs up if u clicked this because the chick is hot



[1Stalker1]

So epic

[infinitystar]

Best was Abraham Moses and lucifer

[SemiazasxXx]

Hahahahah

The Abraham one got me

[effectsfire]

Adams face is priceless!

[jcw3032]

Adam: Want a bone? Baaahahahaha!! These are hilarious..

[WorldofWarcraft98100]

im surrprized she still goes to that bar

[monkoo20]

@WorldofWarcraft98100 Dude, she's into it!

[tigras2244]

@WorldofWarcraft98100 And that she was in cubicle wars

[crazykel217]

1:21 loool

[ddtrinketbb]

brilliant 

[ShezzzDog]

Want a Bone?

Ok!

:D

[feederbyliter]

holy spirit's is a boss

[ColorfulSponges]

Jesus doesn't lie...

[essam721]

hahahahahahahhahahah

[xXPurplePlatypusXx]

Wanna Bone? hahahahahahahahahaha thats genious

[eclipse245]

Wanna Bone? I'm gonna use that from now on.

[anythingforcoffee]

Adam - "wanna bone?" Best line EVER haha

[Underrated555]

I don't get the last part!

[Shindai]

@Underrated555 Abraham was told by God to sacrifice his son to prove his faith

[Wolfsquad1337]

@Underrated555 Abraham almost sacrificed his son for god :P

[Chibir3aper]

It would be cool if you did Great Pick-Up Lines in video games

[Taxtation]

Wanna bone? His face afterwards is brilliant

[slamshrk31]

she gets hotter and hotter ever episode

[spankdatmunkey]

I seriously wonder where you guys get this catchy music.

[wheatingurl]

Lmfao his face <3 1:23

[rmarcelo91]

it'd be better for john the baptist to make a blowjob joke by putting her head down, cause he was known for dunking jesus' head underwater

[randomwithacapitalT]

wanna bone?

[irishguy1494]

Pause at 1:25

[irishguy1494]

Holy spirit. O_o

[schwebbs84]

hahahahahaha MOSES FTW

[Mitche23]

@schwebbs84 No, ADAM FTW

[LittleNichols25]

John the Baptist Mormon Joke! Funniest shit ever.

[kevin63216]

ohh when he zaps her she gets pregnant like marry he was the holy sprite

[L1zardK1n9]

@kevin63216 ohh that's what a stupid persons comment looks like.

[SkwerlBergamot]

my names Adam, guess what im gonna start using

[Ejwoods08]

The holy spirit one was so good haha.. but yall did drop the ball with "moses parts the red dress"

[KrzyUnit]

Can someone explain the holy spirit to me just to make sure?

[TheThreeHeadedDragon]

@KrzyUnit Immaculate conception

[KrzyUnit]

@TheThreeHeadedDragon

lol thanks.

[LittleNichols25]

@KrzyUnit Immaculate conception, like when Mary became pregnant with Jesus.

[nmsanimaz]

BUT IF THATS A PROBLEM...haHAHAHAHAHAH

[bigtsayain]

you guys are the best on youtube!