Laugh at my pain. & funniest person results

[GranFury440]

Lol. You complaining about your back reminds me of that jonlajoie song..... I think it's called Regular Every Day Normal Guy. There's at least two versions. Oh, yeah....and he mentions having a cat.

[gamefire781]

4th one was the funniest

[taylormama561]

you r not funny AT ALL <3

[charbycharlie]

good god. When I was 13 I laughed at my mom who threw her back out while doing laundry. At the time, I didn't realize she was just about as bad as you. I still feel like shit about that.

[BobtheMoneythedbr]

Lol You're so funny. Love ya man.

[LizzieLangham]

OMG YOU POOR THING! I hope you are feeling better now...and OMG YOU REALL JUST BURPED ON CAMERA!!!!!!! ew lollll still lovee your videos though!...annnd you should make a video with your wife! It's so sweet you always mention her!!!

[LizzieLangham]

OMG YOU POOR THING! I hope you are feeling better now...and OMG YOU REALL JUST BURPED ON CAMERA!!!!!!! ew lollll still lovee your videos though!...annnd you should make a video with your wife! It's so sweet you always mention her!!!

[1unity23]

"twilight, new moon.... who gives a fuck?" HA HA HA FUCKING HELARIOUS! i played that bit twice! HA HA HA!

[GhettoShyt]

AHAHAHHA at 1:06-110 that was hella funny.

[sefget31]

golfingdisaster, he made me lol

[snower5554]

Hey my joke made the vid =D

[snower5554]

great excuse to get some oxys lmao

[fireboy3666]

5:20 he has n orgasm

and sorry bout ur pain my hs something close 2 that

[SmoothInstigator]

Did you piss and shit in your pants during those 2 days?

[EMEGAFUN]

suck it up how did u even get vid camera

[EMEGAFUN]

You pusssie

[ganuenen]

this si the second video i noticed u wipe ur face with a sock?!?! do u carry one around with u all the time LOL

[chilifien]

mermaid !!!:P

[XxGrantSGxX]

xD Att aaaa meeddiiuumm pace..

You have a fucking beautiful voice, lmao

[SKONKERxxZILLA]

LOL dude your back must really hurt lol

[katdanson]

thats horrible dude. but you make it funny. laughin at your pain.

[WyldFire777]

You still taking in votes? I vote for the first one.

[nomercyfallen]

twilight new moon who gives a fuck lol

[WyldFire777]

@nomercyfallen I KNOW! Funniest part of the whole video!

[schmumpkin]

Holy Jeus of OW that all seems like it was painful. The back...The toe...

Yeah, I know I'm behind. Deal :)

Glad it's all better now.

[JohnTeeYall]

I sympathise. I just had a vertebrae removed in my back and had it fused together. I am on 5 different pain killers, including morophine. it doesn't help. Hope u get feeling better. Great video btw. 5 stars

[partynmyjeans]

been there bud, and yea "twilight new moon, who gives a fuck?" i asked that when my sister bought the book :P

go to google, make sure suggested search is on, and type in "twilight fans are"

[twobeavers]

you crack me up...hope your back is better now? xo

[ghettobeats]

holy crack I din't know you could mess up your back just by the way you go to sleep.... so that's why my back hurts sometimes... reeer

[tugacacau]

the first one and the last one were the best.but i thinks the first joke wins :)

[LukeWhitaker]

a old lady is looking in the mirror and says to her husband im fat and ugly give me a compliment.

the husband says well your eye sight is great.

R.E.M - rocks

[coolhand12gauge]

my back got fucked up to a while ago. The worst part about it was when I had to sneeze. Hurt worse when I was pulling heads off a motor so I was bent over, then the sneeze came and fucked it up more

[captainfury2007]

Oh for sure, everytime I coughed it killed.

[lowell191]

twilight new moon, who gives a fuck.lmao. u were high  on pills.lol. nun joke.

[captainfury2007]

Yes. Yes I was.

[sugarandlance]

You watched the shampoo hit your foot? LOL!!

[captainfury2007]

There was nothing I could do.

[KaitoKid10040]

dude, how does a shampoo bottle do that to u? but, btw, this vid was so fucking funny. gawd demn it ur awesome!!!! :)

[captainfury2007]

Thanks man! I was out of it though.

[2DollarBOB]

Dude this shit is funny, Don't apologize, and I blew my back out like 6 months ago, it fucking killed me I was right with you

[captainfury2007]

You have the gretest name on Youtube.

[itsBABYSMITH]

i'm gonna have to go with kenrg's....what can i say, i like my jokes short winded and chock full o'nun guts.

btw, you have the best intro EVER.

and i hope you feel better soonly...

[captainfury2007]

Thanks! I do feel much better now.

[goldenguy5]

Hey dude, i'm young and stupid!!, last year when my mom picked me up to go to our High School soccer game we were going through the lights at an intersection, an an idiot(all i can call him) ran into my side of the car, and i got out a played the game after that...i had trouble breathing that night(played the whole game btw) and sometimes i still find my back, i couldn't move for like a week after, so take it easy man, let it heal right!!! Peace!

[captainfury2007]

DUDE HOLY SHIT MAN ARE YOU OKAY?

[goldenguy5]

yupp, that was last september, haha, in grade 11 now, and goin for goalie for the high school ball hockey team, lol, hows your back now???

[NiaomiRuth]

The dog crap joke is the funniest. Hope u feel better, buddy.

[timmmay616]

the 4th one. about fucking a alligator on accident

[FiveStarRookie]

@GolfingDisaster

That's not your joke.

[golfingdisaster]

I'm sorry. I wasn't aware that people "owned" jokes...moron.

[FiveStarRookie]

Funny how you had to use an old joke i heard of in 3rd grade and post it so you can get a chance at being "funniest person in the world". I also meant that the joke you used wasn't original. Moron. Get original kid. And how did you know i commented about you? I didnt click reply. You read these comments to see if someone thought you were funny or something to boost your self esteem? Pathetic unoriginal prick.

[golfingdisaster]

First of all, I saw this comment because it was at the top of the page when I signed on. Secondly, the term "prick" should only be applied where it is accurate. Check your facts first. Thirdly, who's the one who needs to grow up? I'm sorry you weren't chosen. Maybe because it's because you just don't have what it takes. And judging by your assumptions, I'm sure that applies in other areas as well. ;) Who's laughing now?

[FiveStarRookie]

Oh so i was right. You do check the comments because im assuming when you sign in it doesn't automatically jump to this specific video. Are you really that stupid kid? And what facts you dumbass? I swear you are trying so hard to sound smart that you just end up sounding more dumb than before. I also find it funny that you assume that i entered this 'contest". Have what it takes? Lmao im still laughing at you kid.

[NBMonkey]

smoke a fatty.. your pain will go away. Well, you won't know its there anyways.. or care.

but yea, pain is funny when its someone else s. well not blood gushing bone snapping pain, no wait, that can be funny too

[golfingdisaster]

Holy shit! I made it in the Top 5! Yay meee!

[Dontmesswithme45]

haha ur hilarious dude dont change a thing

p.s. love the fucking intro

[MyRealityBytes]

My vote goes to IAmtheSeanMan.

[MyRealityBytes]

Was that a 55 gallon drum of shampoo that landed on your foot?

[Kirbywasfun]

haha your shampoo jk was funnier than the others

[DevinDominance]

your a badass!

[godsmessengerwho]

DUDE!! you are my god! hope your back is ok. your amazing!! i love you!!

[LeopardJoy]

IAmtheSeanMan...although they are all hilarious!

Best,

Joy

[HansomeHans]

IAmTheSeanMan

A man and his wife go to their honeymoon hotel for their 25th anniversary. As the couple reflected on that magical evening 25 years ago, the wife asked the husband, "When you first saw my naked body in front of you, what was going through your mind?"

The husband replied, "All I wanted to do was to fuck your brains out, and suck your tits dry."

Then, as the wife undressed, she asked, "What are you thinking now?"

He replied, "It looks as if I did a pretty good job."

[frosk8ter]

the last joke.

k thanks

[fehquig]

That is some sharp shampoo bottle...

[phkit]

you made me piss myself in the first 45 seconds...gettin old kicks ass!!! I know how ya feel dude

[great1138]

hmm tough decision just with these 5 they are all pretty good. Get well soon and you are probably thinking "no shit" lol.

[idunno2012v2]

Hahaha "Twilight new moon who gives a fuck." hahaha funniest shit ever.

[crackwhorejarvie]

IAmTheSeanMan wins, hands down.

[3CoolKats]

I gotta go with IAmTheSeanMan.

Just for the heck of it here's a joke I heard today.

A guy walks past a mental institution which is protected by a tall wooden fence. He hears the patients in the yard saying over and over, 13.....13.....13. He curiosity aroused, he tries to figure out what's going to. The fence is too tall to look over the top of so he looks through a large crack in the boards and is promptly poked in the eye with a stick. The patients then start yelling 14...14...

[xTruekiwix]

twigh light new moon Who Gives A Fuck ROfl

[jamsouth2]

is that a snuggie?

[belfastsixpack]

love the REM!

[Mattzombie6]

I like ActionJacksonabl's joke the best

[johnsoccer9v]

snower5554 and yes, who gives a fuck about twilight

[DILLIGAF333]

ActionJacksonable and MyRealityBytes reminded me of an old Cheech and Chong routine, so they get my vote.

That and I went to Catholic school, so kenrg's joke about a nun brought back old, painful memories I've long tried to drown out with whiskey.

A hurt back sucks.  I used to hurt mine all the time when I was epically fat. Not that you're epically fat, I just...fuck it, hope you feel better.

[captainfury2007]

LOL I love you man. Thanks dude. But yeah, I'm fat.

[pfcmarine0311]

trust me man your not fat. Just bigger fat is when you need a wheel chair to get around.

[goupanddown]

I don't get the last one...

[carebearwva]

ok was just sitting here showing my husband a vid of you and repeatly saying he is "Awesome" Then your dick headed ass goes and says "twilight new moon, who gives a fuck" Um I DO!!! Unsubscibed!! lmfao just kidding Hope your back feels better!!!!

[archyr]

Oh, and my vote is for golfingdisaster :)

[archyr]

I feel your pain. Have a bad disc. Long story short, pills help in the short term sometimes, but the only thing that ever helped long term was...Physiotherapy. Yup, never woulda believed it myself, but it did. This is coming from a guy with degenerative disc disease who's back went out 4 times a year like clockwork. Oh, and yet another great vid, CaptainAWESOMEfury :)

[MyRealityBytes]

Wow....I wish I could help you. I know what kind of pain you're talking about, I spent an entire week laying on the floor with a pinched nerve in my shoulder once. I didn't think pain like that existed...Your kitty is worried about you. Pets are just the best when you're sick (shame they can't cook or wipe your butt too). Flattered you picked my joke as one of the top five. I'll read over the others and vote. Hope you're better now.

[kenrg]

Ouch! That toe is cut! How big was that shampoo bottle? Like a five gallon metal jug? Try getting a normal 10 ounce plastic bottle next time.

Okay, voting... Should I be self serving and vote for myself or put in a vote for MyRealityBytes? Hey, Mooseman didn't vote for me!? That son-of-a-bitch is in for it now!

[tvproductionschannel]

I thought you meant your toes nail fell off. well a cut would be better. oh yeah I made a video response to you.

[ActionJacksonable]

wow thanks man.....glad i made it........and thanks to the person that added on to myn

[jagjagin]

the last one and the one about the alligator was funny, the rest sucked, and even tho ur in pain, ur still hilarious.

[jagjagin]

boogers on the cam lol

[SuperDieMaxx]

IAmTheSeanMan wins! That was hillarious, I cracked up! rofl.

[andymooseman]

I vote for IAmTheSeanMan. But, they were all good.

Hope your back gets better soon :)

[mastergunner99]

I recently just fucked up my back bad too. I had to take muscle relaxers, an assload of tylenol. Couldn't walk. It gets better. Still hurts a bit even now and it's been nearly a month.

Initially it was taking me close to 5 minutes to even get out of a car. I screamed in pain when I had to move my foot to press the brakes.

[3BallJosh]

my vote is for seanman

[ASECONDCHANCEAROUND]

see if you wear the shoes I have, your back would be able to handle anything..lol

Hope you feel better !

**Kisses**

[Ranblv]

Snower5554 had the best one, great joke.!

Feel better man, that looks like a FUBAR situation!

[dredlocks666]

Snower5554

[PappyStu]

Well thou Ken is on of my bestest buds I have to go with IAmTheSeanMan

[PappyStu]

PS I haven't got your YouTube's Dumbest Video Contest submission yet... Get out of bed!!!!

VEG

[PappyStu]

Pappy messes up his back now an then so I know where you are... It sucks to be you right now... It always sucked to be me when I did it...

[wickedBABZ]

I hope your back feels all better soon. I guess the best joke is... umm... the one by IAmTheSeanMan

[OhCurt]

No 8-track player?!?!?

UP YOURS!!!

Okay, seriously, I'm really sorry your back is out. I hope the pain clears up fast.

(what a cool kitty for keeping you company like that)

Ps. Kenrg's made me laugh the most, but I might be biased.

[ralfonzo83]

Poor Stevie.

If I could I would take away your pain and coddle your pussy like there´s no tomorrow.

[alterdbyme]

the last one was best

[alterbyme]

@alterdbyme

Lol, faggot whats with your name?

[alterdbyme]

My name is better then youres.

[alterbyme]

@ alterdbyme

Yours is just a cheap-ass knock off.

Not to mention is fucking LAME

[CrtlAltDlt]

i vote the second to last one!

[captainfury2007]

Thanks.

[jeninjimi]

SO sorry for all your pain, I hope that you recover soon- back pain is no joke. Love your cat too, what a sweetie :D

[captainfury2007]

Yeah, she's awesome.

[SimplyMelissa101]

sorry your back is so messed up!

[captainfury2007]

Thanks. I feel better today though.

[gunman50cal]

i hope you feel better soon

[captainfury2007]

Thanks so much.

[Whitestar17a]

I hope you feel better soon

[captainfury2007]

Thank you so much.

[pfcmarine0311]

damn man hope you get better soon i know your pain 4 compressed disk in my back

[captainfury2007]

Dude, why the fuck is it always the back?

[pfcmarine0311]

i have no damn idea think the marines had any thing to do with it ? lol They always said that carrying a heavy back pack in school would mess up your back. And our rucks where a hell of a lot heavier lol

[debstef]

I'm not the funniest. But I'm pretty darn funny

[captainfury2007]

You are dude, that german one killed me. Do you ever do collabs with people?

[debstef]

I have once. Quite a while ago. I've never liked the outcome of those.

[6621790]

hope u get better soon man

[captainfury2007]

Thanks. I feel better roday.

[Sugartalker]

I know we talked aout this yesterday but I now your pain and I really feel for you man. Every step I take since my back attack is a gift. I hope you feel better soon!

[captainfury2007]

Someday, I want to sit in a bar with you and watch moose go by. Or is it Meese?

[Sugartalker]

Duh! It's "Mooses". pft, Americans.

[LuckyStrike502]

I feel your pain. Earlier this year, I hurt my back, as you probably know. I was going through the same thing, and it was painful to do anything whatsoever. The doc told me to rest for a few days and gave me pain pills. It helped, but I'm still having back problems. I need to go to the chiropractor, but I haven't gotten around to it. I hope you get feeling better. Back pain is the worst.

As for the joke, I'll have to read them all again later. I'm about to go to work.

Best intro ever, BTW!

[captainfury2007]

LOL. I felt inspired!

[xmonke55]

kenrg

[captainfury2007]

Yeah, I told that joke today to my dad.

[sunsetlover]

sorry for your pain captain, hope you feel better and kenrg for the joke

[captainfury2007]

Thanks! I feel a lot better today.

[battim]

don't hurt your pussy. i vote kenrrrrrrrrrrrg. his joke was funny, i enjoy violence against clergy jokes

[captainfury2007]

LOL Violence against slergy. fan fucking tastic.

[mjndblain]

twiligh....noo mewn....who gives a fuck

[captainfury2007]

LOL Yeah, I don't really watch that stuff.

[darkstarwood]

smoke some herb =)

[mjndblain]

u mean the shizzle?

[captainfury2007]

Why would you smoke shizzle? XD

[captainfury2007]

LOL.  Not my thing, but thanks man!

[tchapman1977]

I feel your pain, man. After a near-fatal car wreck in 1999, I became a firm supporter of chiropractors. Matter of fact, I'm scheduled for an adjustment on Wednesday, yay! You are soooo right about painkillers not doing shit to dull the pain, too, dude.

[captainfury2007]

Yeah, I just saw the spinal cracker today and I feel so much better.

[tchapman1977]

Cool. You said in the vid that the chiro sent you to your GP to see about an MRI or CT to find out what happened. I assume it wasn't anything major (other than bad subluxations, that is) otherwise the chiro wouldn't or shouldn't have laid hands upon you. Also, one thing that the chiro had me on a couple times that was totally sweeeeet was a TENS (Transcutaneous electrical nerve stimulation) unit. Damn thing'd put me to sleep while it was running it was sooo relaxing even w/all the pain.

[painkiller9404]

bad...really bad.

Hope it all turns out well.

[captainfury2007]

Thanks. Your name suits. lol I feel a lot better today.

[painkiller9404]

...glad I helped :D Man that shampoo bottle's got something against you >_>

[GoucheGizmo]

ASS! This happens to my neck when i sleep weird.

[captainfury2007]

Simple. Stop sleeping wierd. lol

[GoucheGizmo]

Its not like i mean to!

[sheri226]

Off Topic.. Very bad situation with the back pain. this is from someone who is currently down with 3 ruptured discs and 2herniated.. get ready for the pain my friend. lay on your side, use a heating pad and get the MRI stat! Your friendly Texas Nurse, Sheri ps crawling with socks on your hands helps.. trust me

[captainfury2007]

Thanks. I can use all the help I can get!

[VelazquezproductionS]

Eveeryyyybodyyy hurtsss....

hope you get better dude.

Isn't there a mexican lady chiropractor? Those are the best, no joke or anything.

[captainfury2007]

Thanks, no, my chiroprator is a body builder. Its like having Hulk Hogan adjust my back.