Cow kills owner

[benbons]

this translation is not accurate at all

[reekashade]

KILLER COW ON THE LOOSE 💀

[neikaplay]

i understood it. rofl over 'the simple likkle cow'.

[zulukydd]

WTF is he saying??

[lijit77]

well if dem neva know seh him bad, now dem know seh him bad!

[flabnblab]

I realized after

Ewas just a likkle kow.

Turns into one big lang sentence.

[clintonreid18]

The cow is possess

[flyboy1175]

"pants foot" what the hell is 'pants foot"?

[Youngslady]

@flyboy1175 bottom of trousers lol

[AisaKlubbz]

The cow did kill it's owner based on the report. One of the individuals even gave explicitly details of the scene where the tragedy occurred . The description of the reasons surrounding the tragedy is even funnier. "The owner was trying to attack the cow with a machete, but the cow attacked first and impaled the owner through his neck" hahaha

[freedomfighterguy1]

In Soviet Russia cow kills you.

[zappy158]

wow....i am from jamaican background and i did not understand a word he said. I guess it is true that country people talk differnt

[deceptionriddim]

AH DUPPY COW , WELL EXPLANED..FUNNY :)

[TheSuperonestore]

THE OWNER USED TO FUCK THE COW.

[StarLifePromo45]

"a wha siimple likkle cow inuh, mi nea kno seh him bad....Lol!" Big Up Ja.

[floyddowner]

how the hell a cow can know about reprisal???

[jaflavalewis]

@floyddowner is a Jamaican cow enuh! wey u xpec???? DWL

[ThatguyNice]

Maybe di cow have mad cow disease and dat's why him act so mad.

[saberl1979]

I Can understand him but the funny thing is, him country bad lol

[thugguyuk]

duppy cow dat deh

[Trinitus231]

this reminds me off KAtt Wiliams talking bout the Tiger...

[MekkaSG]

some parts of it i coiuldnt make out (mainly because he was talking so fast) and I was born and raised in Jamaica. Patois is Patois but IF you are a born Jamaican you know that in the rural areas its a lil different.

[fyabun]

I forwarded the video to a Nigerian friend who's never heard Jamaican being spoken at its roots. The subtitles may give her a clue as to what's being said, so in that way it's good. Aside from that I see no other reason for them. Studying our language with it's particularities & peculiarities is a great way of seeing how we approach life...how we view things. Turns of phrases can "sweet you" But just laughing at it in comparison to English is a backward exercise. Not intended here hopefully.

[AFN41]

I overstand patwa but it seem like those guys spoke a patois for the patois. It's the worst type i've ever heard.

[fyabun]

@AFN41 How can patwa have a "worst type"? Would that be like saying Scouse is worse than Cockney in England?

[AFN41]

@fyabun I simply meant that I hear folks speaking patwa but they sounds totally different from all that I've heard.

[fyabun]

@AFN41 I would be interested to know if you live in the city. I live in England and this is the type of language my elders came from JA with 50 years ago. When I present it to cousins still living in JA They say it sounds strange to them. Or some phrases that I hear used they tell me that no-one says that in JA. Funny how the world turns. Anyway thanks for the video, it makes for interesting debate. kip up i gud wuk mi naah diss i' program. owas beet.

[EASTNJMAN]

Sad that the cow killed him. Butt that second guy had me in tears.

[gayann30]

well I'm a Jamaican born and I could not understand a word he said honestly.....

[Blackseed1978]

Although i born in the U.S. and both my parents Jamaican i understood the whole video up until that last guy with the mash up teeth i couldn't really make out what the hell he was saying lol.

[Stevenwhyte5]

Now dats wut u call "mad cow"

[zacedful]

LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOLLLLLLLLLLLL­l

[Lordseydious]

Jamaican are so funny! Smoke weed and do funny shit XD

[Warlordx91]

That cow should have known better than to try and attack King James, hes the king!

[TheReggaegurl]

these translations are making me lol. WHo translated this...seriously?

[jamdownron]

the subtitles are a joke. this isn't funny, but whoever wrote those subtitles were trying too hard to make them be proper english. they could have done way better to just translate for those that cannot understand patois.

[thee11thhour]

Oh, Oh, WOW, Thanks for the subtitles..... would've been lost without them. Sad story.

[jahluva2000]

The translations are a little embelished.. I would even say the person doing the trasnlating is trying to be a little ...cute...I don't know what there is to make fun of. This man is trying to tell a story and do to Babylon...British coloniolism, his access to education has been limited..not dem wanna clown him cause him nah know the "Queens English". Rubbish! The world is fascinated w/ Jamaica, their culture, music, slang, style, and food...and want to steal it as their own..then clown the folk

[simonemlvbg]

as a jamaican that was sad, none of the subtitle was correct. smh you fail big time in the beginning he said 4:31 smh

[drastikVL]

looooooooooooooool 

[19grace83]

Dj Powa needs to turn this into a video wid music too

[Gregorick]

Cravendale, the cows want it back!

[musicodigy]

subtitle fail.

[Barit0nist]

This is the same problem with the newer translations of the Bible; just like those sub-titles, quite a bit of the thoughts, expression and true meanings were omitted!

[human2011able]

I LOVE JA.... JA ROCKS ALWAYS!

[YuhDunKnowYute]

What a wicked, wicked cow eeeh? Mi Neva know seh 'im bad!

[TetukraBOA]

You know you shouldn't make fun of Jamaican language <_< because it takes a Jamaican to understand fully what is being said I'm a Jamaican and I could understand what both of them are saying. Further more, the subtitles are wrong and not accurate because some things the man was saying is not what the subtitles are saying.

[YuhDunKnowYute]

What a wicked Cow.

[876islandqueen]

a wau simple likkle cow innu

[TheAndreDesignZ]

LOL A WAAN SIMPLE LIKKLE COW ENO LOL

[SanjThompson]

DWL

[sashcelslos]

@Corral973 It seems as if you came from some deep deep bush in Jamaica so maybe that's why you and your child understand what the man said...

[kahrasta]

...what a bloodclaat cow

[rmsutherland]

dem trelawny people wicked ah foreign, in toronto and peel region those cops are trained to learn patois but when you see that country talk drop pon dem, yo ..... NO TICKET! lol "uhhh have a nice day sir"

[carolinesalv]

@human2011able No it doesnt!

[carolinesalv]

@human2011able okay "dude" or "dudette" your entitled to your opinions,im guessing you come and go ,but i have to LIVE here and for me and many others,it so DOESNT rock!!! Jamaica SUCKS!

[carolinesalv]

@human2011able lol my comment wasn't just for YOU! but also for many unsuspecting others who think here is a picnic! "no worries"?? cha! nobody says that anymore! JA slang dialect changes every few years so if u want to learn it then LIVE here!!...... now im done : p

[carolinesalv]

@human2011able Iol never mind i just enjoyed messing with you! and its not misunderstandings-its facts! im a Jamaican thats why i can tell u these things. Sure J.a is nice place-(if your a tourist) nice beaches and food etc, but right now its miserable here,tension and voilence is mounting.Jamaicans are having it very hard.So if u want to enjoy J.A-(as a tourist ) go ahead, and if u want the latest slangs i can teach you? i'll message them to u in private.

[sweetberry07]

@carolinesalv Yah My dad moved back a couple of years ago now, he is in Kingston up Beverly Hill, he says it's terrible:( Such a shame, such a beautiful island and culture.

[carolinesalv]

@sweetberry07 Exactly! your dads an honest man, whenever i try to tell anyone---ex (human2011able) about how bad it is here, they act like im lying! Jamaica is a beautiful island steadily going to waste!!

[kierandakilla]

you mess with nature nature mess back

[rantazz23]

ITS A JOKE PEOPLE. the subtitles are the whole joke.

the patwa is NOT that incomprehensible ..its jamaicans poking fun at other jamaicans

laugh at eachother...laugh at ourselves, it'll make u happier.

[powade]

@rantazz23 Thank You very much. I was the one that included the subtitles. I am Jamaican. The story is very serious, BUT the subtitles are MEANT to be FUNNY by OVER-translating the Jamaican dialect. All those who misunderstood get a sense of humor please.

[rantazz23]

@powade lmao GOOD job on the translations they killed me

it is serious that the man died though

[bmaniggyjunior]

@powade yuzemi lol. ah true nuff jamaican talk same way lol. but yes I the subtitles dem wer funny styl wen i took dem in dwl.

[yynnmmbb]

@rantazz23 , LMAO. Thank god. After the opening "Last week Saturday..." , I thought I would be able to follow him. Then I just stared at the captions in amazement for the next few minutes. That was funny.

[Latty2cute]

OMG that sooo sad.

[pixelMEDIA2004]

Say what?

Yes, in the fun of the language we forget that there is a very sad side.

My condolences to the family.

[nikeish]

mad cow disease perhaps? Thats very tragic

[netto84]

mi undastand EVERYWORD. that is real country patwa to di fullest.... and if dem haffi have subtitles, maybe it should be considered another language...hmmm

[Jamaicanchocolate34]

oh this going righttttt on my FB page

[erhshop]

As I was watching this I smelled the Cow Pastures of Manchester and recognized the vernacular of the Area between Clarendon and Manchester.

[yatv]

DWL IS THIS FOR REAL

[soffy2002]

Seriously!!! I had to be reading the captions to figure out some of what they said and I'm Jamaican born and bread. Especially the part where one man said the cow "buck awta" this other dude (2:02.) "Buck awta"? I've never heard "after" being pronounced like that anywhere in Jca before. Dat was di funniest pawt.

[EgoreTR13]

@soffy2002 bred... not bread... lol Hail up mi jamaican fren dem!!

[soffy2002]

@EgoreTR13 DWL! I guess I was typing faster than I was thinking.  It's inconsequential though cause I saw the error but thought it was too much work to delete and retype the comment since it was already posted.

[oakaziz]

Now dis a some real patois. Mi born and grow a JA and man mi have to keep rewinding just to see if mi can understand wha him a seh.

[whiskyandmax]

it is the english subtitles that makes me laugh

[dutchpot2]

bbq anyone?

[reggieced5]

that niggah too raw.

[macrick]

Bovine Power! Long Live the Cow God!

[TAJY26]

LOL!!

[myb7ls]

i don't think the death of the guy is comedy though. it is death so it is definately a serious matter to me

[myb7ls]

im from clarendon jamaica & i understand him but he talks so bad that it will take like 5 second for me to understand his 5 word sentence lol my uncle talks simiular but hes worst because he studders alot lol

[sstacman]

1:18 LOOOOOOOOL

[logtype47]

tears streaming stomach in knots laughing

[daintymish]

I feel bad laughing but this video had me cracking up. I'm Jamaican but mi find it hard to keep up with what they were saying....talk bout country. It's too bad that they neve know seh di cow bad tho cuz him neva look bad lol. I wonder if di owner did pull the likkle rope roun him neck

[chonyc77]

I would have killed him too if he talked like that to me....

[applecreekgirl7]

@chonyc77 yu more funny dan de howle video LOOOOOL

[jamdungdude]

so dem cyaah fine waah nedda piktcha a dih man cept di voter cyaad, cyaah even seet soh good!

[zman1512]

Killed by a COW? Damn! that's embarrassing.

[ilalfisto]

SUBTYKLE?

A facety dem facety!

Bout subtykle.

[caliente876]

not that hard to comprehend if u know and understand patois - - funny none the less and the subtitles are hilarious!!!

[caliente876]

1st witness: - dat is calvin bredda an law di cow mek fi buck dung after im buck dung calvin ee buss fi him pants foot tuh and graze him pan im knee im went round pon di next street roun dere suh now and deh suh now im buck atta waa next man name kings james buck atta him and im tek him machete and chap him and im bolt inna di bush over suh now so all now nobody nuh seem fram dat

[caliente876]

2nd witness: a waa simple likkle cow enuh mi neh know seh ee ee bad fa im nuh look like ee bad. yeam im mey have waa llikkle pieca rope roun ee neck mi nuh know ef a hol ee hol ee rope or a wah im duh mi nuh know how di cow get fi buck him wen me cum and look - ee look like seh im ram im haan inna im neck oe wah - mi nuh know if a cut ee cut ee ee neck wid di haan but me see blood a cum an me co see cheva hol him up.

[caliente876]

(cont) and di cow di madda cow jump over di wire now and dem (inaudible) ketchy cyaaf and cyaar him over di cow farm over here so and (inadible) over yah suh now, gwaan and gwaan until dis mawning now when me up so now (inaudible) me see cow buck dung di owna fi it...

[caliente876]

‎1st witness - a last week sat'deh a roun inna di four tirty 'ours right on di (inaudible) district

me hear d cow coming dung on di rd an a buyer cum fi buy di cow but dey could not ketchy cow so, same time now di cow and di cyaaf coming do...wn now and some more cow and same time di likkle man weh cum fi buy di cow now seh wi muss hol' aan so mi hol aan now

[andreabunnie]

LOL, the owner was actually a cousin of my friend. Apparently the cow disappeared because it felt guilty. Man I love Yard

[TheOnlyOneSon]

This isnt hard to comprehend if you understand patois

[coutiya2007]

in jamaica....beef eats YOU!!!

[Ja1Mac]

1:53 HEADLESS COW ahah (yes i know its neck is turned.)

[LittlePickleOdeon]

Maybe I've had a sense of humour failure but the posting of this seems racist. Like they're saying "Ha ha, the funny black people can't talk properly. This is what they should say".

They're speaking dialect. It's not supposed to be British English.

Fail

[yenditj]

DEAD DEAD DEAD DEAD...LMAO

LMAO

[madzane94]

LOL Karma.. A simple likkle cow, you nuh know how him bad..

Unno mus mine the fields man and stop sell the animal dem to get slaughter

[animeluver9640]

subtitle fail

[alleyhanai]

@animeluver9640 gyal mi neva knuo seh yuh did a watch dis.. DWL

[caffian]

Am I the only one still waiting for the funny part. I didn't read the subtitle and I understood. Maybe because me come from country. The subtitle is nonsense because the man said he never knew the cow was bad and the damn thing translate that as clearly a wolf in sheep's clothing. I'm like wtf?

[uchegab]

@caffian i understood. my only issue is that he spoke too quickly

[blackice9119]

@caffian well imagine a wolf disguised as a sheep. and all the sheep think its a sheep but then it just suddenly attacks! the subtitle is not directly linked to what he said but it has a similar meaning

[Nedas21]

As a Jamaican myself, I have to say that offended by the fact that so many people are making fun of our cultural language. He was not speaking improperly, but rather speaking in our own language and thus it's not really something that should be made fun of in such a manner, especially when the topic is as serious someone's death

However if what is being made fun of is the subtitles which were made FOR the speech and how different it sounds, then I apologize...

Also, ROLLIN' CALF COMING 4 YA!!

[caffian]

@Nedas21 I totally agree. The subtitle is shit. I really don't see the funny part

[Deryckl]

@Nedas21 Maybe I am strange but I understand everything said in the video without even looking at the subtitles. Where is the joke? Actually I agree that the translation is POOR and inaccurate.

[niekz1]

@Nedas21 i hear bells ringing dwl....

[Litnotes]

Time for some cowfoot and beans.

[IM3INFAMOUS]

Di cow boot dung e owna

[BogusJesus]

if you mess with the bull, you will get the horns.

[lexklai]

" 'ole on" = he asked for a minute to gather his thoughts

"one simple likkle co, mi neva know sey him did bad" = clearly a wolf in sheep's clothing

"mi nuh know if" = I can only assume.

HAHAH

[ConcreteRose08]

Its sooo funny the subtitles.....

[daggaranks]

simple likkle cow hmmm....simple trash blind eye

[lexklai]

"wen mi come an look" - "on closer examination"

LMAO

[zedworth]

my word. a one simple likkle cow unuh... damn.

[ObamaPress]

This is the greatest video of all time.

[mrkijohnson]

My condolences to the family of the deceased but I it could just be that this cow was beaten or in the past have witness brutality to his comrades and thought that he was not to be messed with. Maybe he just wanted to run free.

[lydiamattison]

If someone asked me to translate this for a million dollars I could not. Even the subtitles do not match up to what he actually says.

[samoht1288]

dat country patwa tickkk! im on diffrent level lol!

[MARIOLANZO]

who came up with these subtitles?

[ping777]

yo is a mad cow do dat

[wingie92]

this com show niggas them wats beef

[tehutiheru]

Kill the Cow because it has Mad Cow.

[Badangel30]

The COW is from GAZA....! "WE nuh fraid ah no baddy"....LOL

[iwc62]

i think the subtitles are a little patronising, i am an englishman and i understand the man better than the subtitle,

[silenttakuza]

@iwc62 idk how u understand and i , a jamaican, didn't.

[lexklai]

@iwc62 The subtitles are supposed to be funny. They're so proper and the people in the interview are speaking informally. And actually, the subtitles do match up to what he's saying, they're just made extremely formal.

[Akonaddict]

Bwoy dah one yah, bad rasta

[mikeygeneral]

The commentary is far from the actually words. LMAO

" Clearly a wolf in sheep's clothing. " LMAO

[renegadeAssKicker]

yo excuse my french, but this funny nuh bloodclaut.. haa haa haa.. mus post pon facebook..

[Msan09]

yo me a fully blooded Jamaican n mi lost 2 wah him a seh. yo country ppl bad innuh bloodcleet

[Afayah]

sad story... this dialect is really not that bad. I heard everything they said even though I don't speak like that.

[TheMean123456789]

how sad :'( imma cry

[TnOinNa]

mi sorry fi di man weh dead an condolensces to him famly but no man dem translation deh bad it bury mi di boss seh a simple likkle cow dwl mi luv mi country badly

[stephwiz]

Hahahhaa.......I am sorry to be laughing but at 1:12 He didn't just say "a waan simple likkle cow.....mi neva know say him did bad" No that is hilarious......DWL

[donperry1]

@stephwiz when mi hear mi dat part BUSS UP

Sound like he was talking about a youth in the community

[Danceallnightbabe]

@stephwiz a nuh u one!!!!!!! oh my goodness!!!!

i cant stop watching, n the tears are flowing.. lmmaaaaoooooooooo

[aviavi198522]

@stephwiz thts my fav part as well...LMAOOOO

[f0r3ver21]

@stephwiz yooooo mi a dead to raaaass, country ppl talk so diff from town ppl. ah one simple likkle cow

[ericjungleboy]

Yeah, it's not only sake of his accent or country dialect or whatever that makes him difficult to understand. He just talks really fast and eats up some of his own words in the process.

[KemKem9]

lmfaos

[The1Simo]

The patois not dat bad

[airhab]

"clearly a wolf in sheeps clothing"

LMAO

I died at this

[SeXiChicken]

mi geezas

me a live JA all mi life and i still had problems understanding

but the funny part of dis vid is the captions vs wah di man a seh LOL

' clearly a wolf in sheeps clothing'

ROFL

[corral973]

For the people that understood what has happen,was the news about dialect?,are about a lost of life?,what the hell is wrong with people,and for all the so call jamaicans that dont understand a word because of the" country dialect"lol even my daughter that speak german 90% of the time and only goes to Jamaica every once in a blue moon, had no problem understanding it..so please drop the act....I love my Trelawny dialect, I will do everything to keep it.

[pulsegang]

exactly lol,i was born in mantego bay,if you think this dialect is hard to understand lol try listening from some one der.I don't believe you are Jamaican if you cant understand them......NO WAY!

[aesopsmoke]

@corral973 yeah man keep it real.

[tammygood]

@corral973 Ummm...OK! Good for you.

[911andre]

lmaooooo

[cutty115]

GET SOME ONE TO SHOT DI FUCKING COW

[kimigoodable]

@cutty115 I agree...me woulda shot mi self if i got the chance

[meso06]

give the cow the calf back. simple!

[Jamieak1fan]

How is this comedy?? Someone is DEAD..WTF

[silenttakuza]

@Jamieak1fan the story isn't funny the subtitles r

[pusifut]

no hear what it is people from St Bess have a very strong dialect wey ah nuh every Jamaican come across all di time. mi undastand him still but it just take listening attentively

Obviously the owner was confident with this cow originally, but she became unpredictable when the calf was approached by people andthen taken away. She was stressed and defensive/aggressive. It happens sometimes. I know that people and dogs in the UK