My favorite jokes from the Twilight Rifftrax

[BionicleChicken66]

where IS she going?! <:U

[ronin6401]

i rofl'ed so hard when they started doing yakkety sax

[MrComoncur]

That is one powerful boner!

[MrComoncur]

Its almost your.... British

[Yapshire]

There are no words in the English language (or any language for that matter) that can express completely how much I abhor the "Twilight" series. May it burn in hell for all time. And for everyone who acted in it: May the fleas of a thousand camels infect your pubic hairs. Wait. That curse wouldn't effect Edward. Damn.

[Zuyuri]

Kevin's interpretation of the song had me in stitches.

[MegamanXfan21xx]

"Hey, Dracula, I'm going to lunch. Call me when you get some, okay?"

...

Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz...

[dexdex1560]

yaxety sax music amazing!

[summzzxoxo]

"it's not what you think, I'm just trying to avoid the draft!" "...we haven't had one since 1973."

[Casundia]

This is the best of what they had to offer for a movie like Twilight? Yeah, there's no fucking way I'm paying to watch this.

[leeza2007]

lmaooooooooooo..*i want to chomp into your throat..and watch you bleed out on the floor....*

[Casundia]

@leeza2007 You're laughing your ass off off off off off off off off off off off?

[HinataChick38]

HOLY CRAP! I never noticed the armadillo disappeared there!

[markreiley]

The funniest part of the Twilight riffs is impossible to condense into a highlight clip. One word: "Line!"

[rattymama]

I've seen many a Rifftrax in my day... and this is still my favorite of all. I've literally seen it probably well over thirty times. I can't believe that given how much I really hate Twilight but the Rifftrax of it is ADDICTING! It's a riot! (WONDERFUL for drinking parties!)

[THiNGYBOBinc]

This was the only way to survive through this movie.

[kallgoren]

OMG, I have a reason to buy twilight.

[evilbeckychan]

The first time I watched this, I was forced to by my grandma who loves the series, for no reason. I swear, this stupid movie gave me a headache with the horrible lighting and mumbling. Not even for the rifftrax....Sorry boys...I will buy Beowulf, however!!! XD

[zombiepi]

"Whee this is fun! Oh I love you Edward! whoops..." *thump thump thump* oh god!!... LOL

[DarthSephiroth2012]

When they talk, I keep picturing host segments from MST3K.

[flyinsolo2]

4:19 the very reason why vampire are so terrifyng!

[flyinsolo2]

lmao Metropyre!

[KSRPproductions]

I got like a bajillion bionicles too.

[Wildflowersfield]

Honestly, I cannot watch any of the Twilight movies without the Riff! I wait until they release the Riff, rent the movie and then laugh my butt off! Also, for those not wanting to spend a lot of money for the movies, I saw the first and second Twilight films at Walmart the other day for, like, $10 each. Hopefully they'll be down to $5 soon. LoL!

[snipetracker]

Kevin: -Gasp! - How dare you, sir!!

Bill: -Scoff- I dare!

Kevin: My contributions to the vampire, butt cheek-sparkling research are renowned, and I will not have your slander! Shame on you, sir!

Bill: No, shame on you!

I can hear Servo and Crow arguing.

[JyginsGreenBird]

@4:03 had me gagging in laughter

[ZoanBlade90]

7:06 /spittake HAHAHAHA!

[superMETRIOD346]

That is one powerful boner hahahahaha!!! Who thinks of that? That's fucking hilarious

[kaerowyn]

Vampire sparkly butt-cheeks!! LOL

[Herhinney]

EDWARD WOULD SO HAVE LEGOS! lol

[Haxcz]

"The cameraman is being chased by a badger!"

[VTPPGLVR]

*Eric lunges away*

"I mean, you're REALLY ticklish!"

X-D I know some ticklish people who would do the same thing!!

[SunSparkle129]

My cat does that; I hate it DX

Lol rlly? My friend does that 0_o

[ronvins]

"Camera man is being chased by a badger."

[Jaykanu]

Love the joke about Legos.

[OldManRiver54]

@Railtonleejohnson

I'm smelling someone who likes to troll Americans here.

I'm American but I like Monty Python, you don't need to be from the country of origin to appreciate humor.

To avoid a nationalistic dick-waving war, lets both agree to disagree.

[AspieWytch]

@Railtonleejohnson I'm Canadian and I find stuff funny!

[monsterinyourpocket]

So you have to actually buy the movie to enjoy the riff?! Thats like putting your arm in a vat of scolding acid to get the winning lottery ticket at the bottom.

[6Young6Nastyman6]

@monsterinyourpocket you can always rent it. Like I said in another comment, I "borrow" it from a "friend" *WINK*

[lukegreen37]

@6Young6Nastyman6 You had sex wit her to get it?

[MrShenanigansMan]

@monsterinyourpocket Netflix man

[banananer16]

"you don't eat or drink anything, you never go out in the sunlight"

"it's almost like you're british!"

[00Petulia00]

I just realized Bella and I have the same comforter. God damn it.

[heythisislauren]

"so what are you listening to?"

"kidz bop 9. pinnacle of the kidz bop series i think."

lmao i was laughing so hard

[NateSean]

Thums up if you want to make an Internet Meme out of Kevin's interpretation of Bella's lullaby.

[NateSean]

Oh god, I love these guys.

[masterermac]

I'M HARPO!

[kaerowyn]

"It looks like the cameraman's being chased by a rabid badger!"

[KanaraMac]

To buy the full thing, would I have to buy the movie, too?

[6Young6Nastyman6]

@KanaraMac when you buy the Rifftrax you get an mp3 of them riffing and you have to sync it up yourself, how you get the movie is up to you

I "borrow" it from a "friend" if you catch my meaning

[KanaraMac]

@6Young6Nastyman6 So, it's kinda like iTunes? It's not like a mail order thing? Sweet! That means I don't have to buy this crappy excuse for a motion picture!

[soupalex]

@6Young6Nastyman6 Three cheers for "friends" and crap movies that I wouldn't willingly spend my own money on ;)

[Cpt50Caliber]

@6Young6Nastyman6

So you get the mp3, put the movie on your tv and need to start the riff as soon as the movie does?

[Sahluful]

@6Young6Nastyman6 You stole it from your neighbor?

[apeygirl]

"seriously, I don't know what emotion you're going for because you always look nauseous." God, this never gets old. I always find new giggles.

[Lightscribe225]

I assume it will zoom into the words 'very delicate' and 'arms like pipe cleaners'?

[PyrozPlayground]

Gah! The armadillo's back! Get tha hell out of here!

[TrippyScarecrow]

Rifftrax is the only way I will EVER watch Twilight

[mineMissHellsing]

@TrippyScarecrow AMEN!

[DomIstKrieg]

vampire sparklieness research community. For some reason, i found very very funny. People in long lab coats examining sparkly vampires.

[LovesMassEffect]

God this movie alone is so bad. I find it painful to watch even with rifftrax. They are still funny though

[viddymeenow]

Went to the Rifftrax for "House on Haunted Hill" last night-it was great, but the 2 short films before it were PAINFULLY HILARIOUS-OMG!!!!

[TheFireChick11]

what is it with badgers?

[ANIMEMASTER1111]

THE ARMADILLO

[kwan1282]

Benny Hill music for the win

[Mynahsong]

Rofl about the armadillo. I can't believe they found that, obviously they weren't paying to much attention to the movie itself xD

[MsTwilightRoks]

LOL. love the Lullaby!

[TheCrazyal02]

"We can squat here all afternoon."

I hate Twilight.

[nogoodsnookeroo]

i wish you could see their silhouettes on the bottom

[killerbumble]

But where was she going!

[purpleshamrock17]

I love how Mike is Edward in the poster...hahaha!

"Shame. On. You. Sir"

"your pants are snarky and hostile"

4:29-4:37

"get the hell off me!"

[JamesOhGoodie]

30 Seconds! It took him 30 SECONDS to kiss her!!! That scene felt so long you could write thesis papers during it!

[KMxHearts]

Does anyone else imagine Crow T. Robot and Tom Servo instead of the actual people talking?

[AuburnTigers111]

@KMxHearts Lol I do 

[WheeoftheDead]

"You've got so much music."

It was like 25 CD's! That's considered a lot?!?!

[sipasabayag]

long live MST3K and the art of riffing!

[Acciosoad]

Oh my goodness. Bell's Lullaby had me cracking up. It was so funny. I love these guys!

[mothglitter]

@Acciosoad Kevin's a musical genius; check the Tom Servo Renaissance choral quartet in MST3K's "Quest of the Delta Knights"...awesome LOL

[Acciosoad]

@mothglitter

HAhAHA! Funny stuff.

[JamesOhGoodie]

6:45 DO SOMETHING!

[GoGoGadgetBeer]

4:05-4:24

Bela Lugosi would shit if he saw that!

[dustymew]

"do you like legos? cause i go legos, i star wars, i got power miners and i got a biggalion bionicals too!" i love these guys!

[Centuria13]

Vampire Sparkliness Research Committee.

[dustymew]

i went on the web site (it sucks you have to pay to watch it) but can you do one of these but on thier new moon? please? i'll beg! (begs) i just can't afford to watch it.

[SpaceTrucker101]

LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLADIES! lol

[teaandcoffee11]

Love the "Benny Hill theme" scene!

[Leedle111]

Vampires are queen and werewolfs are dumb.

[Knightmessenger]

"It's almost like you're British."

One of my friends did a Twilight trailer spoof video and one of her replies to a similar line was "You're British."

Weird huh.

[hollyhuffstutler]

"Good God, a peewee football team takes less time to score!"

[MrVictorClark]

I was laughing my ass off! I actually have the rifftrax for this, but not the DVD.

[slygirl1117]

This vid makes me want to get the Rifftrax for Twilight now.

[6Young6Nastyman6]

@slygirl1117 Do it, you won't regret it

[LordCanzite]

@6Young6Nastyman6 ITS TRUE!!! I own 3 of the Harry Potter riffs from thier site, pure gold!!!

[emilygracey]

I second that. Best $3.99 I've ever spent!

[ars731]

@slygirl1117 Its one of the funniest things you'll ever watch

[TheDoctorNumber13]

@slygirl1117 But doesn't that mean you have to own Twilight!?!? No quite worth it! :)

[slygirl1117]

@TheDoctorNumber13 You're right. But it would make watching the movie WAY less painful. :)

[Mightymedic101]

@slygirl1117 Same here, I will only watch this movie if someone is making fun of it