Fast Car for Sale!

[frio109]

Zarbod the Select. "This is a second attempt to notify you that warranty is about to expire. You can now renew your warranty by paying us $1,000,000 dollars".

[LollipopOfMika]

q miedo

[frio109]

Zarbod the Select. Why is it not on Zarbod Motors??? Frio, First Science Officer.

[Zarbod]

Well, even I am not dumb enough to do business with me. Wait a minute...

[frio109]

Zarbod the Select. Ah, hmm, are you sure of that? Frio, First Science Officer.

[LucyShy]

Yo Z', your voice seems to have dropped an octave or two, Alien puberty?

[Zarbod]

Lucy, I wasn't sure what it was. My doctor said it's either puberty or menopause. I was hoping it was puberty.

[Bobofet241]

Kiss unemployment goodbye!

[Zarbod]

I'd kiss anything at this point.

[PlanetZoltar7]

Too easy, must resist urge to make really bad but very funny comment.

[frio109]

PlanetZ.......GO ahead make your DAY. Frio, First Science Officer.

[GregGallows]

I wanna be an undertaker when I grow up :)

[Zarbod]

Why on earth would you want to grow up?

[lapislazuline]

is that the car with the idea and not

a thing Zarbod ?

[Zarbod]

Nope. The idea was a method to establish relationships between several factors in a giant dataset using artificial intelligence. They didn't like it. Argg.

[PlanetZoltar7]

I was in a store today and I saw a sign that said "Wet floor", so I did. Then the manager got all made at me and threw me out of the store. What did I do wrong?

[Bobofet241]

Humans are so ungrateful,I'm proud of you.

[Zarbod]

I don't know. But tell me this...why do they call it a "hot water heater?" If it's hot, why are you heating it?

[PlanetZoltar7]

hot water heater is a contradiction in terms, kind of like someone expecting you to make your black shoes shiny. Black means that something does not reflect light well, and shiny means that it does. How can something do both?

[PlanetZoltar7]

Unless you're trying to make hot water really, really hot; then, of course, it makes perfect sense.

But, where does it all end? Just how hot does the water really need to be? Is there no end to the madness?

[Zarbod]

Yeah. Plus they're always giving kids vaccines for diseases they don't even have!

[PlanetZoltar7]

The vaccines are made from the very diseases that they're trying to prevent. So, they're giving the kids the diseases that they don't want them to have.

[Zarbod]

That's crazy talk. That would never work.

[Zarbod]

Hmm. Not sure if I agree with you on "shiny." I'll have to give that some thought. That's an interesting point.

[PlanetZoltar7]

I was back in that store today and the "Wet floor" sign was gone. There was a new sign that said "Void where prohibited", so I did.

Once again the manager went berserk and threw me out. That guy must be crazy or something.

[Zarbod]

He needs better signs. I wonder if sign stores make their own signs.

[PlanetZoltar7]

That's like wondering if a dentist does their own dental work, or if prostitutes...um, well, you know.

[PlanetZoltar7]

How about Floppy? It seems like it would be a perfect car for him.

[Zarbod]

He said he prefers to go hopping down the bunny trail.

[irontoad123]

Try saying its perfect fro delivering Pizza. In a way its true

You delivered a meat product on time and to the right place. What more can they want?

[Bobofet241]

Brownies.

[Zarbod]

Well, while I was working for the undertaker I was moonlighting as a pizza delivery dude. Let's just say that that sorority party was not happy and...while the Johnsons were hungry, they were not happy with the funeral we hosted.

[Richmunnich]

Try E-Bay! I am not sure whether or not it works because I tried E-Bay and misery loves company. The camera I was selling didn't sell there so...

[Farabutt]

LoL I'd buy it if I could. Got a few (living) bodies I wouldn't mind hauling away.

[Zarbod]

Oh, you just take them out to the country and let them run free. That's what we did with grandmother and she never found her way home.

[blackbart99]

I use that standard of measurement too. I had to leave Florida cause my back yard was full.

2 bodies/12sq.ft.  One acre= well you do the math.

[Zarbod]

Well, if you know how to compost, you'll never run out of room.

[Blinkazoid]

Wow, I think that's the shortest clip for a thumbnail insertion I've ever seen.

[Zarbod]

One frame is all you need!

[saturateu]

LOLOL

[Chivalryaintdead]

I rode in the trunk of several cars when I was kid, haha!

[Rowdyeh]

Any color I like as long as it's black? A trunk that holds 4 bodies? Sounds like you're selling a hearse! You could use it for a camper van between trips to the cemetary! Lol!

[Zarbod]

Heck. Maybe I'll live in the hearse while building my house.

[Rowdyeh]

Hey yes why not? A small matress and some curtains across the windows you could move into any trailer park, beware the trash though, it can get smelly. Lmao!

[RiddleSpider]

uhm, can you paint it for me? and add some bling to it? I would consider buying it.

oh, I lied to you the other day, weekend was BUSY!!! so....wait until I get a shower, then I will film. ;-)

[Zarbod]

No problem. I'll totally pimp it out.  I'll jack up the wheels and add those spinning hubcaps. You still want the rocket launchers mounted on the sides right?

No problem. See what you can do. I have my part ready.

[Zarbod]

Oh, It struck me today that I should probably warn you that on my half of the project we're working on, there might be a little bit of flipping people off. Just a bit...not more than 20 seconds though. I don't want to overdo it.

[allansfriend]

You have pretty eyes, Zarbod.

[Zarbod]

Well thank you my dear.

[starzship]

I heard (ahem) that that car could hold up to 6 bodies if they were...a....chopped up and stacked with care. Some guy named Guido told me......

[Zarbod]

RiddleSpider has some experience with a wood chipper. I'll have to ask her about it.

[aanyakae]

The dead do not bury dead...

you don't say?

...The Corpse.

That standard or metric?

[Zarbod]

I should have said it was "4 Metric Dead Bodies". Oh well.

[ChristopherMast]

The proper unit of measure is "dead hookers"

now you know

[Zarbod]

Are those Standard Dead Hookers or Metric Dead Hookers?

[ddlsr]

Standard in the U.S., metric in Europe, but the conversion is 1:1.

[Zarbod]

I'll need a calculator for that.

[MISSBEBEBLUE]

four bodies at one time?

[Bobofet241]

It depends on the number of seat belts you have and trunk space.

[Zarbod]

What would Ralph Nader say?

[Zarbod]

It's very spacious!

[ukp42]

nice big estate cars hold more than 4 bodies, i got a BMW 320 tourer & that holds at least 6/7 bodies no problem, maybe more?

[Bobofet241]

Only if you stack them like cord wood.Put tarp down first,it will save the carpet.

[Zarbod]

Sometimes I tie them to the roof.

[ukp42]

Nah! You get spotted by the cops, always hide the bodies! lol =)

[ukp42]

i use plastic sheeting, very cheap, & cleaning is easy! lol =)

[irontoad123]

Some fluids can seep through and leave dna

use the old rubber bags to be sure

[Zarbod]

Hmm. You seem to know a lot about hiding dead bodies. You must watch a lot of CSI...or something.

[Zarbod]

Maybe I need an SUV.

[ukp42]

Well, there is always a problem with fuel economy and heavy road tax in the uk! lol =)

[Zarbod]

Road tax? You guy have taxes for everything! I can't complain. I'm paying $3.79 per gallon. My brother in Norway pays $14.

[justplainerica]

Four bodies, you say? That is a spacious trunk!

[Zarbod]

I've never had a complaint.

[TheTittySisters]

Zarbod..you are a silly alien!! Lol.xxx

[Zarbod]

Yeah, I get that a lot.

[vikingsfan619]

dude,i just put my sax on graigslist!

[Blargaldalien]

I tried to get sax on Craigslist,but the police came over and said I was naughty.

[Bobofet241]

I called my Dog Sax.I often hollered his name from my front door.My neighbors called the cops.I told them all I wanted was for Sax to come when I wanted.My hearing is next Tuesday.

[Zarbod]

Maybe R Kelly could give you some tips on getting off?

[Zarbod]

Watch out for street sax salesmen. Sometimes people will offer me sax on the street and somethings they are talking about something else and sometimes they are cops.

[Bobofet241]

Even Cops need some sax now and then,we have all our needs.

[Bobofet241]

I think E Bay is your better bet.

[Zarbod]

Cool. I need to sell everything before I take off for Alaska.

[Bobofet241]

YARD SALE AT ZARBODS! Free Popsicles,he'll play his Sax! All items up for grabs, low low prices.(Except his Sax as it has sentimental value,he won't sell it but he might rent it out)ALSO! A Kissing Booth,Zarbod kisses are a Steal!Better suction than the O Rings on a Nassau Space Rocket! Come one ,come all!!

[Zarbod]

No kidding actually. I need to start Ebaying my DVDs and junk. I also have a violin from 1750 I need to take to an auction house.

[Rowdyeh]

Oh wow, I once got kicked in the sax, I coudn't walk for a while.. Lol, I can laugh now OK? Lmao!

[a4near]

Does the car come with dead bodies in the trunk, or should I supply my own?

[Bobofet241]

You can pick them up real cheap.Home bodies are easier to get.Their generally abundant in an older neighborhood.

[Zarbod]

Well "getting" dead bodies isn't the hard part. It's the getting rid of them which challenges me.

[Bobofet241]

Space em or use them for fertilizer,you'll be the envy of your neighborhood.Or stuff them and put them around the living room so you always look busy and popular.Then there's canning for the lean Winters in Alaska.Or you could just hunt actors and call it 'Silence of the Hams'.

[timecentre]

woot...."hey,look at all the friends i got"...

[Zarbod]

I saw a movie called Silence of the Hams.

[OneoftheImmortals]

How many live bodies fit in the trunk?

[Zarbod]

Far fewer. They tend to complain a lot more too.

[emzirek]

1ST!!

[Zarbod]

You are so awesome!