Harvard (Cock)

[pennsays]

On Conan, whenever a guest he's interviewing brings up that he went to Harvard, he would interject that it had been the Harvard Driving School.

[corenothing]

leave princeton be, those people are angels 100% - harvard though... git harvard good

[donquickoats]

When I say "Harvard," you say "cock"!

Harvard!

[stupidfli]

cock!

[quem98]

See, most of the people I know who went to Harvard (cock Damnit! Now that'll be in my head for the rest of ever!) actually go out of the way *not* to bring it up.

In my experience, the conversation goes

"Where'd you go to school?"

"Boston."

"Where in Boston?"

"Ummm... Cambridge."

This is usually code for Harvard (cock... Yep, rest of ever...). And sometimes MIT. Granted, this may just be a different ego massaging tactic, but whatever.

[CaptainKanuk42]

It's a tactic, saying a vague location makes people curious. People then want to know and hone in asking you more specific questions. Then you can gradually reveal it while looking modest but feeling triumphant :p

[quintus87]

I think when ever someone says Oxford or Cambridge you should say "wank"

[pedanticmofo]

If you say "cock" whenever someone says "Harvard," what happens when you meet someone who says "Harvard" whenever someone says "cock"?

[Boevis]

Hilarity ensues

[BABABABA5555]

That only happens in Soviet Russia.

[FlyingFooBalls]

@pedanticmofo lol, people who always say cock will probably find it exceedingly un-funny

[deadlysinner17]

I say cock everytime I hear Harvard(cock) now. HAHAHA

[ShipsSurgeon]

If you listen carefully, there is one moment where Penn says harvard without saying c*ck.

Sorry, didn't mean to use the asterisk, just making sure Youtube doesn't censor this post.

I guess what I'm trying to say is, "Yeah, Penn...screw all those harvard c*ck s*ckers!"

Keep up the good work as usual, man.

[thomthum2000]

I'm going to start doing this for my college from now on. It's not as prestigious as Harvard (cock), but people can be pretty smug about it.

[crablord]

3:13 you didn't say Cock after!

[P0mt3]

lol, true.

[bboy11894]

The "friend" who went to Harvard and worked on the West Wing writing team is Lawrence O'Donnell or L.O.D.

[avooslwuthoqquan]

Ha ha. I have an uncle and a good friend at Harvard cock. I'll have to start doing this to them.

[MANAXvids]

every time somebody says Cock (harvard), I will say Harvard.

[xxLextalionesxx]

Just say cock for all of them.

[VinceOmega]

Yale pussy. Sounds...erotic.

[tonzimala]

He obscures the real danger of that stinking fascist shithole known as Harvard.

>>>"Petty jealousy thy name is Penn Jillette. Why not say "genocide" when they say Harvard? Use your fame to discuss how Harvard turns out mass murderers by the score, insofar as it is a breeding ground for US presidents and other errand boys for depraved tyrants, and recruits for the genocidal US state dept. Oh I forgot, you get paid millions by corporations who profit from the permanent regime. Never mind."

[lmm85]

This is like playing "the game."

I'm going to think about this next time I heard the name of the University.

[JesusSanchezz]

ahhhh! I LOSE~~~

[youvebeenthunderstru]

I lost the game.

Thanks a lot, you fucking jackass.

[gr1283]

At 3:13 he says Harvard and doesn't follow it up with cock.

[SlightlyNotorious]

yeah, he kinda says "cock harvard" so its just inverted.

[mmmrazor]

What is this old granny babbling about?

[freestuffffff]

Petty jealousy thy name is Penn Jillette. Why not say "genocide" when they say Harvard? Use your fame to discuss how Harvard turns out mass murderers by the score, insofar as it is a breeding ground for US presidents and other errand boys for depraved tyrants, and recruits for the genocidal US state dept. Oh I forgot, you get paid millions by corporations who profit from the permanent regime. Never mind.

[archetype0]

Penn, it doesn't always mean that those who say the H-bomb instead of college just want to feel special. It's also true that, when a conversation about college comes up, most people would ask "where'd you go to college?" When a person replies "Harvard" (cock), the person asking the question feels like the other was being deliberately vague, so they can fish out that question and show off.

There doesn't seem to be a middle ground between pride and humility in this case.

[TheRedneckAtheist]

Harvard

[xXmentalconstructXx]

cock

[TheRedneckAtheist]

WTF, why did you say cock?

[bobd007]

The most dangerous people on the planet are Ivy League politicians with soft science degrees. Most all of them have been indoctrinated into Marxist/Socialist philosophies.

[packrat76]

Obama?

[bobd007]

Yes, Obama, the Bushes, all the Ivy leaguers who believe in Big Government.

The last good President we had came from Eureka College. These Ivy Leaguers will turn us into a soft Communist society.

[UrinationNation]

There is nothing soft about communists, or communist society, I lived in one for 11 years and trust me people that live in those shitholes are tough as fucking nails. Think of it like the free market economy and letting companies fail, well this is the same thing except you let an entire society/country fail and then they pick them selves up, or they don't, but there is nothing soft about it, the soft don't make it, the soft move away before the shit hits the fan. America is not even close

[bobd007]

You're misinterpreting my use of the word soft.

[UrinationNation]

I'm sorry how did you mean it?

[bobd007]

That we would adopt many of the policies and tenets of Marx without the millions of dead in shallow graves.

[est794]

missed one @ 3:13

[SelfAccountable]

Always fun to put an elitist in their place.... good stuff Penn.

[knoose]

I can only imagine how amazingly fun

it would be to have an acid trip with you.

[dangerics]

It's like when people insist on calling themselves by their degrees, as in, "Sincerely Dr. John Smith, Ph.D." Well I have a masters degree and my new policy, when confronted by someone who insists on being called "Doctor" is to insist they call me "Master." Hey, that's my degree. I've earned it. Of course it's in theatre so it's an utterly useless degree. But still, I've earned it.

Peace.

Sincerely,

Master Dan Gerics

(.com)

[quinn2469]

LOL!!!!!!! Master!

[lnd3005]

How win friends and influence people...

[blackie0nassis]

Stupid and snobby... I could never dream of going to an Ivy League, but that is some immature retarded bullshit. Good for you, treehouse.

[motleyhar]

Caught you once saying Harvard without following cock, fyi.3:12

[HentaiGuy42]

You didn't "catch" him...it was pretty obvious he was making a small joke because he said cock (Harvard). I thought that was the funniest part of the bit.

[motleyhar]

Wrong. Read what I said... if you can read. Damn I hate ignorant people, one day you will all be banned from the internet. PS... Hentai is for sicko's so dont respond, sicko, since I sure wont.

[HentaiGuy42]

I read what you said...now read what I said. *facepalm* And you're saying I'M ignorant? Oh, and I love how you throw in the ad hominum at the end...like ragging on my handle somehow gives you the high ground. Myself, I prefer simple explative...so fuck you in the neck...and have a nice day.

[tqd86]

you're both idiots

[vivalajazz]

You what's almost as bad as pointing out that you went to harvard(cock)? Using latin in everyday language when it really serves absolutely no use.

[HentaiGuy42]

You know what's even worse than that? People who can't be bothered to find out that "ad hominum" is the proper term for the logical fallacy being used. And who gives two shits about the fact that it's Latin? Are you going to start punching people in the dick because they use the term "etc." (et cetera) instead of "and so on?" Or how about "alter ego?" Yep, that's actually Latin for "other self." "Alma mater" instead of former school? "Quid pro quo" instead of "this for that?" Fuck off.

[cant1be1original]

i'm likeing you hentaiguy42... *nods* Not in a homo way, but in a kind of wow, thats some major pwn'edge.. HOpe you can exuse the use of homo; yeah latin it's for bitches.. ^_^ lol

[TheJoker7682]

WTF? The Harvard Yard is 2 inches!!

[superdeer]

only for the football team.

[chazlilz123]

looking to be rated in private any takers?

[HammandClov]

if Harvard cock, Yale pussy, then Princeton...(clogged)anus?

[masterohumans]

Yale pussy has a nice ring to it.

[vash4me]

hey Robbie,

What Effect is that intro? The program, is it Vegas? Final Cut Pro? Video Toaster? After Effects? Please tell if you have the time.

[VioletCosmonaut]

Yikes. Cock a doodle doo.

[justinfrost]

3:12 he says cock (harvard)?

[Lagomort]

Penn, you are such a moronic petty child.

Not so moronic as to be Dennis Miller,

but darn close.

[CelChan4]

Hey Rob, how much do you get paid for each of these uploads? I'm authentically interested. I presume you do the editings too and the description/tags etc.

Thanks if you reply.

Robbie - Our hero.

[thegags]

(cock)

[GCRU486]

This is strictly my opinion,and my opinion means diddly shit, but you are one homely MOFO. I know your richer than a fucking Wall Street banker, but your still a homely MOFO!

[AhmadJohnson0930]

God is real and the bible is true.

[4d4mz]

lawlz

[CaptainFeigh]

Wrong.

[AhmadJohnson0930]

Im right.

[CaptainFeigh]

You're balls-awful wrong, and Penn would agree.

[alucard1083]

lol

[MRCHEEZLE117]

3:13 he says cock then harvard, but no cock after that

[deviant3232]

Well he was quoting someone else so to say it at the time would be misquoting the person, I dont think he is necessarily wrong in doing that per se

[JPaulDiLucci]

yeah, misquoting would be a big offense, also I think he was playing within the rules anyway because it was as if he was saying that another way to do it is to put the cock first, you see, the game itself hinges upon playfully bringing down those who bring themselves up with Harvard (cock), he was directly focused on that point (and was commenting on that point) when he said cock first, no justified man could dock him for that, not a sane one at least

[batlrar]

I think it was applied to the previous word, since he says Harvard really quickly. And I suppose he did say it a bunch of times after that too.

[allthatisandeverwas]

So without marauderz1234 around for the other half of my commentversation, I sound like a prick. I guess it's good that he's gone, but still...

[comcapco]

ditch the intro and cut to the entertainment--I'm out of here. Give my love to the blue light guy.

[sunchyne1]

Old men with long black hair freak me out.

[5imian]

dear god, why?

[speciesamused]

Hi, how nice of you to take the time to talk to us about Harvard Cock. I am a great admirer of yours. I love your glasses. Harvard sounds like a great asset to those of us who enjoy good humor. Peace

[thegags]

slap in the face with a cock?

[dogwomble]

(harvard)

[allthatisandeverwas]

So it goes...

[allthatisandeverwas]

Jew boy? I'd almost be intereseted to find out where you got that from, but I've wasted enough time on ignorant fucks like you to know better.

[allthatisandeverwas]

He's a 41 year old pothead: I don't think he gives a shit that you blocked him. I think the fact that you actually were insulted enough to look up that information is more pathetic than his lifestyle choices.

[dood901]

dude.he's a 53 year old genius,dumbass

[allthatisandeverwas]

No, we weren't talking about Penn, we were talking about someone else.

[5imian]

Hes never smoked pot or drank before. Hes actually 53.

You're an idiot.

[allthatisandeverwas]

Yeah, which is why Penn's not who I was talking about. It was some guy named Pipethekind. I was originally arguing with someone named marauderz1234, who seems to have had his comments and probably channel deleted. That's why there' a few comments later on that seem like I'm defending myself to someone. I LIKE PENN, I'M NOT INSULTING HIM. MATTER OF FACT, I'M SUBSCRIBED.

[5imian]

oh well that makes sense. Well and good man!

[allthatisandeverwas]

I'm glad you understand now :)

[ratfinker85]

Hey Penn are those J.Garcia frames?

[ratfinker85]

Obama should say it too...lol

[danly305]

your voice is incredibly annoying.

[KoolDudester]

I think his voice is gravely and soothing :)

[rkz]

How about after anyone says Brown you say anus.

[Baltzley1]

Now that's actually funny!

[litxlit]

Well, they're proud of going to Harvard. Nothing wrong with that. They should be. Share in their joy, kind of in a Buddhist way. It costs you nothing, and enriches them. But, when people brag about the college their KID went to, THAT pisses ME off. ;)

Re: "Bullshit" show on Peace, trade didn't seem to help Georgia much. It helps to trade AND be powerful.

[BillTheHeathen]

It's not being proud of having gone to Harvard that's douche, it's dropping the H-bomb (i.e. finding a way of announcing the fact).

By the way, 'sharing joy' in a Buddhist(cock) way - in fact, doing ANYTHING in a Buddhist(cock) way - IS douche because Buddhism's BULLSHIT!

[Noxypig]

He licks his lips alot....

[Twobitz1]

Harvard

[Heemoproductions]

Atheist 1-0 Onuund

Round 2!

[TheAmazingAtheist]

Onuund sucks HARVARD

[CaptKilljoy76]

Cock

[TheAmazingAtheist]

When I say Harvard, You say Cock!

HARVARD!

[ManliestViking]

COCK!

[TheAmazingAtheist]

HARVARD!

[ParisianHermit]

COCK!

[Onuund]

Fuck

you sir

are a dipshit.

[souther]

i don't understand whats going on

[palmtreez101]

Harvard

[TheStig000]

cock.

[broadjumper1]

I went to USC, cock...

Ah, doesn't have the same ring to it...;0

[logicianthemagician]

It's a reasonable explanation.... but why the pants on?

It would have been a more tolerable video had you been pantless ;)

[Flap999]

Penn cracking my shit up...

[Jessiqua42]

You don't even know how great this is! I'm fucking in love with you Penn!

[Pipethekind]

HE wasted YOUR time.your the dumbfuck surfing videos on youtube.did he take you away from doing genetic research?.or is that 4:34 you could of spent jerking off to gay porn. Since your time is sooo valuable, let me suggest you click the red X in the upper right hand corner and go take care of your rugrat in the other room who is currently sticking his finger in the dogs ass while eating the kibbles and bits.....

[ConalCochran]

I just can't take no pleasure in killin'. Some things just have to be done. Don't mean you have to like it!

[negrosaurus]

not sure if I get it... the point is everyone who went to Harvard is a cock?

[AssyrianRebel]

No, but they will never fail to mention that they went to Harvard.

[MisterEvil1]

Seems like a suitable explaination to me!

[mortusdominus]

Well here watch this then dumbass, gRnZp9JOsYw.

[TheDeLoreanFlux]

It seems like you have OCD about it. haha

[dackjaniels555]

cawk!

[phish1988]

funny as hell

[chimera15]

You overpay that much for an education, you'd want to bring it up too. lol

[BillTheHeathen]

The bit doesn't work because Penn's constant celebrity(cock) pal name dropping comes across as more obnoxious than the dropping the H-bomb: Me and my friend who wrote for "West Wing" and my other pal whom I can't mention by name because he's a legendary rock star and my other friend who's a famous scientist from MIT all agree it's obnoxious when some mentions the fact they went to Harvard.

It'd be obnoxious if they said it to me, but Penn's a rich celebrity (cock).

[chimera15]

hahaha Yup, it always astounds me, what a hypocrite he is sometimes.

[shabaz14]

explain

[chimera15]

He frequently derides and insults others on things that he himself is guilty of doing.

[TakaraKing]

Speaking as someone from Wisconsin , I'd call the UW Nazi's because they're a bunch of eletist snobs .(if your not from WI , you wouldn't know what I'm talking about)

[toKs1c]

cock ^_^

[C0ct0pus]

let's see if this works:

Harvard...

[darkreign16]

cock

[C0ct0pus]

gimme some more!

Harvard

[darkreign16]

cock!

[C0ct0pus]

you're my hero :) . . . . . . . . . harvard

[darkreign16]

cock!!

[ConalCochran]

Go get 'em Penn.

[zach7000]

penn make a video on that bigbang thing in sweden

[DCStream]

Hadron Collider? Not much to say.

[zach7000]

its interesting, they predicted the black hole will start in 50 months, november 2012.

[DCStream]

A Black Hole with enough size to destroy the earth would be easily noticeable during the experiments. They do not plan on keeping it running that long either, it is just a simple way to test theories.