Should I Divorce My Husband or Stay for the Kids?

[Nanadsyl]

Never stay in a abusive relationship.

[gstavrou]

This women's husband got angry that she having an affair, instead of taking care of her husband she is cruising face book to hook up with ex- boyfriends. What a catch, what ever happened to morals?

[Savethelostones]

marriage losers who ignore God,the church and prayer.the Lord Jesus Christ set me free (present tense) I was a druggy alcoholic,mean,lost Jesus made me new .Find a GOOD Bible Pastor. They are talking off their loss,s only.

[Spadadiforza]

She wants a divorce because she is having an affair. Foolish American woman.

[Spadadiforza]

She wants a divorce because she is having an affair.

[Spadadiforza]

Should she divorce her husband or stay for the kids? FInd a way to work out the issues....

[ITaLyIOvE]

dan and jen ? one question . If and when you , dan and jen , prove to the world you both have the " perfect " marriage , you'll be taken seriously , if you both claim to have the perfect marriage than I'd have to say you are liars . trust jesus .

[MrWomplord]

Dan is a retard and says irrelevant, naive things.

[STILL81]

She fucks with other people and the husband is bad because he throw her out of the car? He should have beat her up to death!

[flyestmommie187]

@STILL81

Looser what do u live in a box?

[STILL81]

@flyestmommie187 shut the fuck up and fuck off what the fuck are you? jerk!

[rantarave]

people are always attracted to the same people. If you are getting divorced to live with another person, he will be the same.

[djk28161]

Blonde brain dead bimbo

[23695angel]

Kids grow up! ! then ...they get married and you get stuck w/somebody who make your life miserable,horrible, abusived, unhappy, be little you, your sel-esteem, doesn't love you, doesn't appreciate you????? Ask your self ,"Do I want to live like this???? God doesn't want you to live like that, UNHAPPY!!! is not an excuse..is mentally abused....its horrible..Nightmare!!!!

[thesoccerguy13]

@23695angel I think your brain just threw up on your keyboard. There was no organization to that post at all.

[SuperTruth77]

Last year my wife left me for some asshole guy. It makes no sense at all- I’m a CEO and he’s an office admin douchebag content to earn $60k a year!

At the end of the day if she wants to waste her time with filth, that’s up to her, but I don’t want him infecting my kids with his lazy-ass attitude to life. Already I can see them being less ambitious in school. It’s so unfair & I’m so cut up about it I’m now in counselling- I just don’t know what to do about the situation…

[HOMEnHIGH]

@SuperTruth77 ....one of your quotes on another vid 8 months ago...."Palin came to our school last month and gave a great lecture about being good citizens"......fuckin CEO my ass...hahhaa....fuck off

[SymfaniArt]

Abuse to alcoholic issues are too close a call. Alcoholic can become abussive. I know personally about alcoholics, I was a child when i dealt with an alcoholic parent. I was sad but glad when my parents separated , I would've been happier if it would've happened sooner. I was also in an abusive relationship with the father of my first kid. I declined him when he asked for me back. I'm now moved on, in a healthy, happy relationship while my ex is still being irresponsible. I'm so glad, I said no

[andrew49848]

IVE BEEN IN VALED WITH ABOUT ONE MILLION PUSSYS ON TH INTER NET. I CUM A LOT. IVE CUM MORE THEN MY BODY WAIT. IM ABOUT 210 POUNDS.

[andrew49848]

DAH VORSE?

[andrew49848]

MORE MEN.

[andrew49848]

I GOT A QUESTION SHOULD I CHOP OFF MY DICK. I CANT A FORD A TOLE IT.

MY ASS USED A OUTHER TOLE IT. I SHOULD CUT OFF MY BUT O AND STUFF UP WITH PILLS AND SLEEP ALL DAY AND LEAVE A TON OF KIDS IN A ROOM AND BLOCK OUT THE OUT SIDE WORLD... OK...BACK SPACE. THEN.

[andrew49848]

IM 28 IM A VIRGIN.

[StalkingAlucard]

Hmm well I'm 23 years old now, and for a large part of my upbringing my parents didnt really get along. There was no physical abuse, but sometimes there was emotional abuse. And I just got the feeling that they dont love each other. For example, I have never seen them hug or kiss. Perhaps I should be grateful that they've stuck together, but I'm not. Especially when I got a bit older, I just wished they would divorce so they could be happy for once.

[RUdigitized]

@StalkingAlucard I'm the opposite. My parents split when I was young and I spent my holidays at the airport. So I'd say you should be grateful they had the fortitude to stick together.

[dsrtflwr]

I stayed for the kids. I didn't want to deal with custody and visitation. He left me later on when our children were 14 and 16. Custody and visitation aren't that big an issue at that age. It's worked out well. I'm glad I stayed when they were younger.

My marriage was bad from the beginning. I was very unhappy the whole time, but we were able to be civil and focus on our children. If there had been abuse, drugs, or alcohol involved I would left when they were young.

[OneAgainstMarriage]

Didnt listen to the whole thing yet. Im sure its well meaning. I take a VERY dim view of marriage. If the letter is to be believed this woman cannot divorce this man till they live seperately for at least one year. This is just one hazard of marriage. But they'll make plenty of kids as most people do (3 in this case) to complicate and exasterbate (i better have spelled that right!) matters. Marriage does NOT protect anyone except the abuser. Get the divorce as soon as possible.

[wka656]

Yes you should stay in your marriage and do what ever it takes and let the Lord be gloried in your healing and reconciliation. You shoould not expose yourself to abuse...you should separate for a time and work through your issues with Gods word.

[lastblast7]

Obviously, this site is not giving Christian counselling, nor does this couple care about original families staying intact and working out their problems. They cater to the mindset of "be happy".......forget about the kids. Fulfill the lust of your flesh...........teach your kids that commitment needs nothing............their well being and family means nothing..........forgiveness means nothing........praying for someone to turn around and the family being restored means nothing.

[auntstacey123]

@lastblast7" Christian" counseling told a good friend of mind to stay w/her abusive spouse & try to work it out. She did just that & ended up with a gun to her head. I've learned that Christian counselors are often ignorant to the dynamics of abusive relationships & even though I am a life-long Christian myself, would not recommend it in the event of an abusive marriage. Different dynamics involved compared to a non-abusive marriage. You have to have special training to deal w/that.

[lastblast7]

@auntstacey123 Staying in an abusive situation and "departing and remaining unmarried" as scripture speaks of (I Cor. 7:10-11) are two very different things. Going through with a divorce many times---in addition to bringing another person into the picture can bring on great violence as we all have seen. When a woman does this, many times it leads a man with violence issues (and even some who have never exhibited aggression) to murder either his wife, their children, or take all of their lives.

[truthIsStranger]

My mother told me that when she left my father two days before their 20th anniversary that she stayed with him and cheated on him with his best friend for five years for the sake of my sister and I. So now we have to learn what love is from someone else. I always thought love was pointless, meaningless, empty. Never seen them kiss more than a couple times and it was so phony, but I thought that was love. The answer is to divorce your husband FOR your kids and to explain love to them again!

[orangegold1]

In 4th or so grade my parents told me they were getting divorced after school one day, I couldn't stop crying and I felt empty... Luckily they got back together before the divorce was final, and they love each other now... But having my dad move out for a few months was so painful. If you can get along, don't get divorced.. every marriage has fights, work it out, or get counseling. Don't ruin your kids life... Divorce should only happen if you are abused by your husband/wife or something sim.

[TheGamingFacility]

what the flip is this vid about!!! lol

[Papas1Gal]

What are your qualifications to give advice? This is very serious stuff. Send people to experienced and wise counselors.

[omichicken184]

FUCKING DUMBASS PERSON WHO SENT THE QUESTION DIVORCE IS THE WORST THING THAT CAN HAPPEN TO KIDS

[comedy101ful]

Marriages don't last long these days Mine lasted for 13 years then she cheated feel in love with another man and she left. Life is a crap shot you win some you lose some. I am not getting married anymore I going to have sex with them then leave them. I am also getting a vasectomy.

[001001sith]

shouldnt she be sitting in the chair and conan with the ghetto slip-ons be sitting on the arm of the chair?

thats funny...my dad is a dick when sober...and when he is drunk, he is super coool!

[batmmannn]

Yeah, the fella sitting there acting so superior will be the next one in court being called abusive. Women scream abuse when there is none and the new guy becomes the next in line.

[Liberty4ev63]

How the hell do people f up their lives so much!? They just volunteer for all this chaos!

Here is what I think-

MOVE home to family. Stop subdividing your time with men who are not good for you or your kids. Focus solely on your children and stop dating until the last one turns 18! YOU MADE THEM now RAISE THEM!

[001001sith]

@Liberty4ev63 its called heredity.. they don't volunteer! thats insanity...it is all in the genes...there will be less then half that actually escapes this heartbreak legacy.

[ivo1326]

she should because the kids

[KingofDApin]

you guys are so fake. and the man is very odd..making strange faces ..

[gbwisconsin]

A broken, discordant household with mom and dad still together is just no good for the kids. Take note on how the debt load is a major factor in tearing down the relationship and opening the door for an extra-marital affair. An outsider who would exploit a decaying marriage is not worthy of love. Also, if the church they attend is making demands on their personal lives, the couple has the option of attending another church. It's not fair to blame Christianity per se.

[RyandocDO]

She sounds like a complete idiot...

[gotagetonup]

Oh, good grief! Get a divorce and marry the alcoholic. ha ha ha ha.

[TruthSmack]

Bad advice.

[ghghghgh324]

Take the kids I'm christian but if it's neccecery to leave then seperate see how things go but if it can't be saved and you absolutly have to take the kids

[8TBALL]

Figured I'd give some different insight that you may not find here, God will heal any marriage. His word says so. He makes the impossible, possible. A marriage is the most important relationship you will ever be responsible for.

[BrandonTheRemix]

fuck off

[8TBALL]

Really bro, why the anger? Just offered a different perspective, sorry to insult you by having a different opinion, didn't realize that was wrong. Nevertheless have a good day.

[lovelyhanna]

i wanna get divorce am sooo unhappy with him

[alexlodda]

@lovelyhanna Do it. Find support wherever you can. You can definitely do it. Imagine the freedom of complete possibility that lies out in the light on the other side. It's pretty good shit, man.

[AngryOtaku]

if you have children, you have no business getting divorced. I wish death on my divorced parents every day. MAY DEATH FIND THEM SLOWLY AND PAINFULLY! The wife is such a WHORE! Please Die a horrible death.

[misteeq64]

You have some deep issues my friend . Can feel a lot of anger and pain in these words of yours . You need help to resolve these emotions that are eating you alive. Your anger toward your parents wil not go away even if the die of horrible death .Their is a light at the end of the tunnel .

From a divorce mom who did the best she could .

[Cdenton95]

youre fucked up man.

[jorg243]

This isnt the best of advice they are saying  .Doesnt matter if its bias or not get help, get counciling to stop the abuse or what ever it is ,see a doctor get medication or how to better your marrige relationship etc whatever it takes get help.

[GrenadeChick99]

If a man is attempting to throw his wife out of a moving car it is past the point of Mom and Dad getting counseling once per week. If they were to attempt to save this marriage, Dad STILL needs to move out for Mom's safety. THEN do the counseling. HE HAS to prove that he is willing to understand why he must abuse rather than communicate. The kids will grow up feeling that abuse is normal.

[alexlodda]

Calling it counselling makes it into a mutual issue. Which it is not. This is the issue of a man choosing to use violence to dominate and control because he thinks it's his entitlement to disempower others. She does not 'make' him do it. He CHOOSES to use violence. Why should someone stay trapped in that because of what a bunch of people they don't know think? It's hard enough already to escape. Stopping violence programmes, individual counselling. Because they're still two distinct humans.

[Goraiders75]

You Can not sue them Jack ass your Miggie777 If you think you can then send a letter to Dear Abby and sue her shut up before you give legal advise.

[miggie777]

Are Dan and Jennifer Marriage Counslers??? If not why listen to them, you need professional help! If their advise makes things worse in your marriage you got a law suit!!!!

[ChupacabraYetiElmo]

This video is nothing more then male bashing from the femifascist evil that has run this country into the dirt.

[ChupacabraYetiElmo]

Dan seems to go right along with the male bashing femifascist mind set society seems to push daily. In fact I think Dan here enjoys being dominated. Notice how she sits over and above Dan. Dan isn't a man, he is a mangina.

Notice how she refers to the children as the womans. She should take HER kids out of this abusive environment.

Odd how the male is never there to defend himself against the accusations these venus flytraps throw around daily in this country.

[litisia1]

need geleverance of evil spirits of anger and the marriage will be oke. God hates devorce malac 2 read it

[joshuaw33]

This is not good advice. Please stop. Why is someone taking marriage advice from someone who could not make their marriage work?

[airraideagle]

Divorce is a disgusting & dispickable business.

The vast majority of parents that get divorced,

I mean the ones that CAUSE it, are selfish fucking scumbags.

[airraideagle]

Divorce is Fucked up.

[rnlcjac]

its cheaper to keep him/her .lol

[realdealforsure]

suicidal man talking...

[realdealforsure]

"pushed me out the car there was an emotional abuse"....should I laugh or puke...everyone knows whores are using and abusing domestic violence just to change dicks once they get bored with one...and men are fools like the one above...boy I hope a fat whore take you to the cleaners and leave you with nothing...

[realdealforsure]

be smart never get screwed up meaning married and you will never have to divorce...live a good life change your cars every 3 years and women every 2 years...in this decaying western civilization last thing you should do is get married...don't be a fool...

[realdealforsure]

you idiot you are next...wait and see this fat lady serves you divorce papers...and I drink to it...I hope you got 5 kids and all of them being less than 5 years old so next 20 years you pay the child support and live on the leftovers in the mobile home...you sad sad man

[chadsummers01]

Here is a thought - give your heart to Christ and allow him access to your life and he'll work miracles in your life and your marriage. People no longer understand commitments or the vows that they took and what we have today is a drastic fall of marriages.

[chadsummers01]

Here's the deal; a christian should never marry a non-believer no matter how attractive they are. We are not to be unequally yoked together with those who are in darkness. But, if one spouse leaves due to the other's faith, so be it, that person can remarry if they do all they could have done to win them thru example. But if the other spouse does not wish it, then they can re-marry, but the next time they need to marry someone of the same faith - a christian.

[chadsummers01]

I'm talking about being a christian, born again. Paul said that if an unbeliever walks out due to unbelief, then let them go, why try to change someone who does not wish to change? You can win someone by example, being a good and Godly husband, but listen to me, if she walks out because of your faith, there is nothing you can do but move on. God will send someone into your life who he wants you to have. Just trust in him and forsake those who would hinder your walk in Christ.

[alexlodda]

@viewsonic878 Do you? Why does it matter to you to control what she believes? Can you not go ahead in life and celebrate your differences in opnion and use them develop each other's ability to understand each other and the world better? Difference is a bright and dynamic light. It's the only thing that matters. And it is far better that it exists than no.

[alexlodda]

@viewsonic878 But you can't change someone, and you have no right to do so. If you're not into it any more, do the right thing for both of you and get out and forge your own universe. Or, communicate it and work something out where you go to church, but she doesn't have to, and is not made to feel guilty for her own decision. You are capable of going by yourself, presumably.

[RyandocDO]

And a idiot.

[XxxFEARxMYxBLADExxX]

Also in this video stop the sap story of the woman. The arguements probley are from her acting like a god damn whore calling her damn ex's being married. See thats why I chased off all my wifes ex's and layed it clear if I can't talk to my ex's which "WHY WOULD I" thats why they are EX'S lol. Well if I can't then she CAN'T plain and simple. You cannot be friends with a ex you have FUCKED lol. I mean come on now lol. Thats probley there issue is ex's on her part lol.

[just2w4tch]

DRINKIN!!!

[sehcaepwwa]

I think your view of alcoholism is a little naive and over-simplified. Sure, there's a correlation between alcohol and physical abuse, but that doesn't necessarily imply that alcohol is the *cause* for said abuse.

Dan, I think, posed the hypothetical: who would want to live with an alcoholic?

I live with 4. And we are rock stars.

[zim1950]

nice slippers!

[bigdog49094]

This Lady needs to finish bankrupting this guy and dig for all the gold she can get the judge will help with you with this. The judge has already decided you are the woman and you are suppose to have the kids. Now once you have really made this guys life miserable if you keep hammering and hammering at him you get him to take his own life. His suicide will help all and assist with your want for no visitation. Don't tell your kids he is dead instead tell them that he don't love them.

[XxxFEARxMYxBLADExxX]

bigdog49094, see thats the bullshit most guys need there own damn law with your stupid insight and other bitch's with the same idea's. Sick of MEN and WOMAN like in my instance marry young and its not working years after and many arguements and Jail for me to over her ass. For once I'm the caring dad to protect my kid from a bibolar acting mother and wouldn't let her crazy ass out the house with our child and she trys pushing me down the stairs and I go to jail its BULLSHIT like that!

[XxxFEARxMYxBLADExxX]

Also to you Bigdog49094 you and your say to take the guy for all his money. What made ANY BITCH in that matter a GOD that deserves a mans every penny. Those bitchs are as WILLING to spread there god damn legs to have sex and have kids to. Not just a mans fault.. "BOTH". What right is it that the system favors the women 90% of the time thats fucking BLACKMALE any way you god damn slice it. I'm sorry but these laws favoring WOMAN in this country more drives a man crazy and has him STUCK!

[MrPlummer]

Her kids probably hate her and this new dummy

[howertony1]

Advice from Idiots.

[rh7riky]

Im sorry but dont be so bloody stupid to even divorce it shud never happen but i know it will but it really does effect children badly i myself know this, 45% of children with divorced parents fail in school and often have criminal records, but forget the numbers do what makes you happy just like my dad says, i just thought i'd shed some light on the matter, it'll get worse before it gets better.

[jerrdan1966]

If the husban knew that she is cheating he would probably leave himself!

[jmoctar]

Yes, in NJ you have to be separated for 16 months. I feel the person posing the question is setting herself up with the alcoholic friend. Relationships started during or even several years after a divorce usually fail. Mine certainly did.

[ozgood1x]

Stay together for the sake of your children.

We Did. No Animosity. Separate rooms. Separate lives. No Problems. If the spouse gets "it" elsewhere....no problem. Separate lives. Same House. 30 years.

[Rareed63]

The Courts need to quit making it so easy for these women if she wants a divorce for no reason besides she's bored or has another honey, The court should grant the divorce with no support.

[jmoctar]

An abusive husband is not "no reason".

[airraideagle]

do parents even FUCKING comprehend the MASSIVE, unfathomable amount of pain, suffering, agony and devastation that their selfish divorces, adulterous affairs & remarriages cause? do they? most don't

[siameeyang]

that's true, my parents got a divorce and they just seperated my siblings and I like as if we were just some kind of property. I miss my siblings- AND I HATE having to choose between my parents. It's UNFAIR to us kids.

[Anime4Freak]

I FUCKING AGREE!! The parents should think of how the children will feel. They are fucking selfish and only care about their own needs, not the kids. Parents who divorce with children are too selfish to even DESERVE children.

[SURPRISE010307]

That's not true. My husband cheating on me over and over 20 years. But now I can't handle. So what can I do tell me. I have 2 children 19 and 14. I have to.

[Anime4Freak]

Your fault for marrying him.

[jmoctar]

Spoken like someone with no experience in life. Write back in 20 years when you actually know something about life.

[Anime4Freak]

Right back when you know the definition of "Brutally honest".

>_>

[jmoctar]

Brutal honesty does not imply accuracy or knowledge. Oh, and you'll want to check your spelling. 'Right' is a direction; 'write' describes an activity.

[Anime4Freak]

What brutal honesty does imply is that there are people out there that must know the truth. I mean, if people weren't honest, we would be in a world where EVERYTHING is okay. But it's not.

So people like me grew some balls and told the truth. Even if it means being called a fucker or a bitch.

[jmoctar]

Brutal honesty is the full expression of an opinion, and I encourage that as long as everyone understands that it is only an opinion. What I expressed is an opinion too. My opinion is borne of experience, whereas I do not know what the source of your opinion is. No knowledge is implicit in the expression of an opinion. If you have knowledge, then do share it. If not, then simply acknowledge that you have an opinion and be done with it.

[Anime4Freak]

Hm, I get your point. But now, it's time for you to get mine.

Think about it, why would you marry someone who is going to hurt you. Then again, why would you allow them to, to you and your children?

My point?

My point is that people should take it slow in relationships and get to see the true person within that exterior.

To be brutally honest, that person was a fool, pure and simple. I know that I'm being a bitch and all, but hey.

[jmoctar]

One does not always recognize the person they love is abusive. This can be because the person in love chooses not to see abusive or because the offending partner has hidden his behavior. I agree that once abuse is recognized, it can not be tolerated.

I agree that people should take their courtships slowly.

I also agree that the writer of the letter was foolish, because she was bringing a new man (an alcoholic) into her life.

[Anime4Freak]

Ahh, but lets remember! If she had taken it slow, she wouldn't had been abused. If she saw the abusive nature of that man before marraige, she would probably not have married him.

But too bad that most people rush trhough marraige. Lack of acknowledgment and appreciation perhaps?

[MrsEnglandGirl]

@Anime4Freak Not all of them are. My parents got divorced when I was 3 but they still get along well. My Dad lives in Ireland so I only see him once a year. Of course I miss him very much but it could be worse. My parents aren`t selfish!

I love them and I know that they love me too. My dad is really upset because he can`t see me very often. I think he feels even worse than me. But he`s still the best dad in the world!