Billy Connolly - Colonoscopy

[MikkeDeviant]

it's like a hose that nobodys' holding

[ChesterLoadstone]

Butt humor will NEVER go out of style.

[SuperBRONSON21]

would like to see more stand up by billy,or even to be able to get access to more recordings

[unsanityisreality]

CONNOLEYOSCAPY

[workwithnature]

That was the funniest thing ever, Nice one :)

[Adishkamamadoli]

@yonicekid

[Adishkamamadoli]

Nice is he still alive?

[alemappurple]

This reminds me of a funny story from a former colleague of mine.

We worked in an office and had run out of toilet paper. Bob, who was a big man, went to the near-bye town centre and bought two of these multi-pack toilet rolls with the convenient carry handle,18 rolls altogether.

He was walking back to the office when he hears a very loud voice shouting.

"Hoy big man--------------- wid ye no be cheaper buying a bottle of Imodium?"

[alemappurple]

Vulgarity at it's best, and I'm a prude, but how could you not laugh at that?

Hysterical. Even more so when you know EXACTLY what he's on about.

[kotetsu131]

christ the bloody scots do it every tyme!

[peacefrog1916]

@NUNCLEFRITZ Why you watching it then?

[captainhardcrabs1]

@NUNCLEFRITZ

Your mother should have used birth control

[Zephyesa]

toilet paper in the fridge classic

[lindaandjeff08]

This was so funny, I had tears in my eyes.

[EldrickotheElephants]

Flippin' love this, especially as a fellow Glaswegian! I'd give anything to see him in person myself. He was at the same school as my mum2 If you'd care to help out a fellow Glaswegian, I'm currently trying to win a scholarship to a big firm in London,and would really appreciate some help! If you could search "Eldrick of the Elephants" on facebook and LIKE my page it would really help, got to get as many likes as possible.Sorry for the shameless self promotion, but us Scots gotta stick together!

[bayrat320]

got to your friendly chemisty and ask for "Shiteazy"

[Leowen2]

This is a subject we need to talk about more, I'm always bringing uo the subject at smoke, that and prostate cancer research.

[OMNISLASHER1000]

billy just finds words like that funny cos glaswegians dont have too use them too get their point across,a vasectomy? naw,baws chopped aff!!!

[11strelokfan1000]

Billy (Connoll)oscopy ;)

[mattwhaley1980]

Got my colonoscopy tomorrow.

After having it done 4 years ago and watching this sketch for the first time, I can honestly say its funny because its true.

I will definitely be taking Billy's advice and putting some toilet roll in the fridge lol.

[ApollosPlace]

This is the funniest damn routine and should be required watching for anyone prepping for a colonoscopy just to lighten the mood.

[IVIathemagician]

make the damn crepes already

[zebster101]

i think he's spitting on the people sitting in the front row at 3:22 :)

[human200freedom]

75 people with no taste of humor voted negative on this video...., they must be either dumb, either....dumb again!

[TheNevan60]

LMAO - I think I just pooped a little!

[Nautilus1972]

"A guy is walking past an insane asylum in Glasgow when he hears the residents inside chanting, "Thirteen! Thirteen! Thirteen!" Curious, he finds a hole in the wall and looks in. Immediately he's poked in the eye, then everyone inside starts chanting, "Fourteen! Fourteen! Fourteen!"

[heffaazul]

I keep waiting for him to start praying and then shoot into the audience.

[boogynights]

first time viewer this guy is gold.

[blaziken386]

"This is like... NASA. There isn't a natural thing within a mile of this."

[FuckVilleUSA]

Can anyone tell me why the graffiti on the wall in the back says "JEDI"?

[gunboatd1plomat]

@FuckVilleUSA if you have to ask...

[Psychorror]

@FuckVilleUSA Because the Force was strong within him.

[FuckVilleUSA]

@Psychorror True that.



[MxTommy20]

Lol

[samara147able]

Tears in my eyes, So funny, hehehe

[Instucablanator]

This is the best laugh I have had all year. thank you I needed that.

[Arrath777]

Holy god this is fucking amazing. I'm in tears here.

[RDYS]

I laffed so phreaking hard my sides hurt .. what a funny bit.

[2138red]

my dad is getting a television shoved up his ass tomorrow so i just have to show this to him tonight.

[Vidzstreamer]

@2138red

You mean television camera i hope.

Otherwise that would be extremely painful

[2138red]

@Vidzstreamer haha XD yeah i did.

[hammondesque]

Two days until I have to start my prep for my colonoscopy.. :( this cheered me right up about it, I cried with laughter :')

[riversidemotherfucka]

what u need is a good shit HAHA

[KevinKlinelover]

:p :(

[HardCorpsPredator]

I have never heard a joke anywhere to diareah, and this was hilarious!

[gekizai]

Just wow. This made me laugh so hard I nearly threw up. This has got to be a lesser variant of the Monty Python "Killing Joke." But only very slightly 'lesser.'

[Swiftyireland]

JUSTICE FOR PAT FINUCANE

[StEaLtHmAcHiNe95]

WOULD YOU LIKE TO HAVE THE HIGHEST RATED COMMENT ON A YOUTUBE VIDEO!! IF SO FOLLOW THIS SIMPLE STEP.....

1) (Insert quote from video just viewed in here)

WOW!! YOU NOW HAVE THE HIGHEST RATED COMMENT ON A YOUTUBE STAND UP COMEDY VIDEO!!!!

[dolphinlass12]

fec* ive to get this tomorrow...2 litres of clear out today...woop...wont be laughing today...tomorrow i will when i have a television camera uo ma arse!lol

[ufoDanceParty]

'You see the yellow of the sulfur'

[Thingamajigs]

@ufoDanceParty Thats the oily discharge.

[jzieris]

How true how true

[away97]

looooooooooooooooooooooooooooo­ooooool

[catsamurai16]

I knew Billy Connolly was a genius comedian when I heard this joke. I normally don't like jokes regarding poo, but this one had me on the floor! I'd love to own some of his shows.

[ed88888]

What stand up show is this from?

[movement26]

Watch Billy and his brand new series "Billy Connolly and Route 66".......Posted here on youtube.........It is both funny and informative ;-)

[1wickedangel]

Practically cryin' the whole time I watched this!!!! SO FUNNY!!!!!!

[crisscross1985]

I can skip the gym today. My sides are so tired from laughing so hard! :):)

[whotaughtyou]

HOW? CHIEF CONSTABLE WORLD WIDE

FIERCE JASON STATHAM

WHEN? MADE UP

[yurriah]

I had to call 911 from being short of breath after laughing so hard at this.

[vesternor]

George Carlin actually spoke inside my head, from catholic heaven, and sent me here!!

[comikrocker]

@vesternor George would be smiling up at you

[ImTheFuckinBarbs]

@vesternor ''catholic heaven''?!?!?!?! george carlin was very anti religious, he wont be anywhere near a catholic heaven.

[strongman17]

I have not laughed that hard in a very long time..damn I needed that.

[552Industries]

I watched this in school... got in trouble for it... went down the the principal's office and he saw the video. He started crying with laughter - I STILL got a suspension.

[TANODRODCOD]

@552Industries you should probably go columbine......

[TheXLCHKid]

Anyone who has ever had one, or is THINKING about having one, needs to see this. It comes close to minimizing the fun! Billy is as funny as a rubber crutch!

[MrPagerix]

Does anyone know what stand up routine/video this is this from??

[SSPoseidon846]

@MrPagerix Its from the Too Old to Die Young tour and is featured in the Billy's World Tour of New Zealand DVD :)

[xeniakennedy]

2:41 rules!

[ApollosPlace]

Sweet Jesus that was the funniest thing I've seen in weeks! 

[MrMixbegood]

Funiest man alive,..!!!

[flexwinggpipi]

if you ever need cheerin up!! eh he `s just the best comedian ever. Long live Billy

[moodysoup]

"Ya see the yellow of tha' sulfer..."

[najhoant]

"Now these aren't your high-fibre, natural product, made from tea tree and badger's pubic hair"

[crisscross1985]

I can't breathe I'm laughing so hard!

[ladyofthelake3]

I just peed my pants!

[sketchguy2006]

I hyperventilate, I laugh so hard at this!

[shipgraveyard]

This is so funny, because it is true. Just don't watch this when your doing your prep unless the screen is in the bathroom. Laughter, a cough a sneeze anything will reactivate.

[RainOfTheVongola]

It's the guy from series of unfortunate events! Montgomery Montgomery lol

[chrispwned]

OMG SO FUNNY

[powderyorgan]

Connollyscopy??

[idbeholda1]

No matter how many times I've watched this, it gets funnier each time.

[jozefthedick]

lmfao

[maidenboots666]

Funny stuff.

[mastergx1]

well funny

[every8hours]

Believe me when I tell you: He's not exaggerating ONE DAMN BIT! { That's what makes it so INCREDIBLY FUNNY!!! }

[borednerd74]

I went through this at age 17, but it was this awful liquid that tasted like shit and I fasted before hand. I know exactly what he means. Brilliant :)

[yourjunk420]

"You have to put the toilet paper in the fridge."

[MrHistorian123]

@yourjunk420

No, put it in the freezer - better to be on the safe side.

[TheKimrats]

Amazing!!! xx



[km426]

absoloutly bersht!

[arytmayte]

HAHA was literally in tears there

[astonvillagranda]

hahaha

[fidalgo99]

GRANDPA ?!

[SoulEaterEthan]

Uncle Monty..

[02BikerBoy]

I've had shits that bad before. It aint pretty. My arse was scabbing over afterwards.

[YShlea25]

LOL...OMGsh i cant stop laughing!!!

[TheChrishendrix]

wat you needs a good shit!

[squatch1983]

I love Billy. Have done for years. Funniest guy ever.

[VermontUkulele]

Got one scheduled for later this week. Just had to watch this again. Tears in my eyes from laughing so hard.

[Marioiswicked]

what dvd is this from?

[buidseach]

@Marioiswicked think its from billy connolly's tour of new zealand

[fraya1400]

I watched this with tears of laughter rolling down my cheeks :o)

[Veggieman87]

Why yes, I DO see the yellow in the sulfur.

[ItalianNerd157]

Lmao!! Don't listen to this when you are in a quiet study hall with your earbuds! You won't be able to contain your laughter and everyone will stare at you like you are a mental case!!! LFMF!!!

[Footrockofdoom]

Shiteasy xD

[bruinman100]

the docter has'nt lost intrest in my balls

[lilmissbitchy16]

I absolutely love Billy Connolly!

[crash0517]

Im going for my 2nd Colonoscopy tomorrow morning, going to be spending the day in the bathroom lol.

[SrbinIlija]

I am 1,599,000 . viewer!

Kako sam samo moćan!:)

[MuikJuaggre]

2 words. John. Cleese.

[HACUNA89]

Holy macaroni!

[akhbar699]

Go to your friend the chemist and ask for "Shit-EZ"

[CdnGuyEH]

Wait until you hit 50? - heck, have not even 40 and just had my 5th colonoscopy today. From VERY recent experience. BANG ON!!! FUNNY AS HECK!

[beeniefide]

3:32 I'm slightly put off by the fact Billy got a boner talking about laxatives.

[becamarko]

Don't care if the topic is colonoscopy, he is still hot as hell!

[KyoNanashi]

Oh my god....my chest hurts from all the laughter....

[bkhass52174]

Hilarious & very true

[YShlea25]

LMAO.....Omgsh...hahahhaha...t­his guy is so F$#%ing funny....LOL!! I cant stop laughing!!

[Bearram1]

And it is just like that too. lol

[socialinsecurity3]

Boondock saints..

[xtrabass]

I love Billy Connolly but despise toilet and fart humor. Dislike dislike dislike...

[wo804349]

tears... so funny

[donot0991]

THIS ISN'T FUNNY!

[sergeantfan3]

@donot0991 Fuck off and be your boring-self somewhere else.

[DillTurnips]

@donot0991 ur right, it isnt funny...ITS HILARIOUS!!!



[xocite]

You have to put the toilet paper in the fridge!

[TheAmphet]

I watched this while doing the preparation for one... made the whole movement so much easier, I was laughing so hard.

[Frebazak]

Okay,... ya justa bout killed me Billy. . You described it perfectly. Laughed so hard, I was on my hands and knees... slapping the floor... gasping for air. Been there, done that.....bought the T-shirt.

[LetsCarpetbombGirvan]

rubbish



[wnesbitt1]

I laughed till I cried! I'm due to go through all this next week!

[blueray1969]

you want t o see something really really funny? Look up BC and tap watter - the Ibiza story :)

[xDan92]

3:01 "I'm looking through the wee hole."

LMAO

[nathanB091]

if freddy krueger was real do you think gillette would sponsor him? :3

[PMAN46]

im only 15 and i have a few colonoscopys. this is funny as shit.

[csmck1]

one of the funniest people on the planet

[DieNarbe]

Shiteasy! loooooool!



[username1me]

what a legend

[xeiroe]

You remind me of my da. <3

[EdTheGringo]

Remove the excess hair and the moustache -->John Cleese look-alike

[Marvcohen]

He describes it perfectly

[PinkasJax]

Briliiant! I just had a colonoscopy yesterday. Spot on.

[10hab]

LMFAO

[NomSugarPlum]

56 people have wee willies.

[Exodia64]

When he made the quip about needing to put the toilet paper in the fridge, I lost it... cracked up in the middle of typing my report. My office supervisor's shaking her head at me :P

[QJordon]

Billy Connolly Rocks... He has always been great. 

[DinkyKeyChain]

I thought to myself, I'll go to bed after one more clip. I laughed so hard, I'm wide awake now. Whoops.

[stormypast]

I just had this sent to me via email.....OMG. I was in stitches at my desk.

[Hopersz85]

Lmfao omg so funnt lol  i swear

[clutchmc22]

He made #1 on an all time U.K. stand-up comedy list (*top100)

[ecosse133]

I have been a fan of billys since the 70s he tells it as we all remember it growing up as kids and puts some humor into everyday events he has some discs out and CDs also starred in a few movies but my favorite is his BBc trip around scotland friggin brilliant ....check his bio online langmayyourlumleek.billy

[Ricardo1939]

It's my turn tomorrow!!

[uching]

it is exactly like he described, only he makes it sound funny.

[undeadxromance]

LMAOOOO



[00bliss99]

Oh, this makes me thankful that I'm not at that age! So, funny!!!

[omfgaragorn]

54 people's asses burned

[RickyCafe]

Been there, done that! Totally hilarious and absolutely true.

[TheKeysersoze95]

i love the way he says "ass"

[TaskMaster619]

he did this routine in 1993 I think it was... different back story to it though

[sbrookes1991]

Go to a chemist and ask for,  'Shiteazy' xD

[TheMusicman12ize]

he is the man so true what he saying here as well incredible guy billy

[MehrtsNZ]

Toilet jokes suck. Was a couple of funny lines in here, but not much more.

[SteveHoweJeffBerlin]

@MehrtsNZ  People like him can pull it off, lol.

[metallifreak77]

@MehrtsNZ You suck. Toilet jokes are great, it's a part of the human condition so you are welcome to suck farts out of me asshole if you'd like.