David Cross - Bigger & Blackerer - Heroin

[toterrapin77]

i definetly puke my insides out on dope though. haha

[elevatorisland]

bet you anything he's talking about tompkin's square park

[rad4life1]

oh never mind, he did it! LOL

[rad4life1]

oh dude, you forgot the heroine junkie dance! similar to the crack dance, only youre not looking on the ground for more crack lol

[dr1345]

love David Cross and Patton Oswalt but both of their last stand ups kinda sucked. especially that annoying kid and deaf guy in the beginning. that was cheap, cheesy, and hacky.

[ShookOnesTO]

2:19 doesn't exist

[TeamZealand]

"Holy shit it's 8:01"

[craxclimber]

cool you can talk about drugs like you've done them, hoorayyyy... idiot

[JN5B11]

he obviously has never done heroin by that impression he has, he was probably on ketamine

[squfucs]

@JN5B11 yeah you're right

[BacklTrack]

@JN5B11 No? Sounded like heroin to me. If it was ketamine he would of described some dissociation of some sort.

[JN5B11]

@BacklTrack his description is exactly that of ketamine. that or he got some heroin laced with 90% baking soda

[BacklTrack]

@JN5B11 Question.  Have you ever done ketamine or heroin?

[JN5B11]

@BacklTrack yep. both, multiple times

[BacklTrack]

@JN5B11 Definitely different than my experiences. and the ones on erowid lol. Did you ever get in a k-hole? But it sounded like heroin..sleep, happy, sleep, happy, naseau. Ketamine seems..so much different.

[WilhelmDrake]

@JN5B11

What are you talking about? That was right on.

[BacklTrack]

@WilhelmDrake Right on. Also, i'm pretty sure David Cross knows what he's talking about. 

[BillBuchananFtw]

@JN5B11 time does NOT go that fast on ketamine

[WilhelmDrake]

@JN5B11

Have you never heard of junkies going "on the nod"?

People on junk often nod out in mid sentence. It's quite funny to watch.

[daniel11357]

@JN5B11 suck a dick

[DanTraxex]

@JN5B11

That's exactly how heroin is, you've obviously been fucked over by your drugdealer my man

[joshkirkcash]

@JN5B11 sounds like heroin to me.

[SongHooks1993]

@JN5B11 not rele i used to snort as many bags as i could by the tenth ide be hurling my ass off ide eat a bagel or something and 10 seconds later ide be hurling that shit up

[jamied931]

@JN5B11 ketamine is more like "oh its 4" (20 minutes later) "WTF ITS ONLY 4:02!"

[rpm2004]

@JN5B11 or he did too much and just fell asleep.

[cetnikz]

Fuck heroin it sticks to your soul and is hard to peel off.

[squfucs]

@cetnikz That's a good comment man, thanks.

[skaloon]

@cetnikz

what soul?

[JivemasterJ]

@skaloon yeah, no such thing brother!

[MoonPisces029]

thats fuckin hilarious!!!! wow

[apicalmaristem]

One of the funniest bits ever...maybe because I've been addicted to heroin, but really it made me laugh til I cried. Also, I wish this clip included the part about the chinese acrobats...and also I wish I had a magic telescope that could look to the outer edges of the universe...so I could sell it for heroin.

[squfucs]

@apicalmaristem I believe in you as an addict.

[WubwubDubstep]

That's exactly how I feel whenever I do codeine. Why didn't I just pop out and buy some weed?

[squfucs]

@WubwubDubstep sometimes you need to spice your life up with some opiates

[WubwubDubstep]

@squfucs too true.

[MrDorkusMaximus]

I'm not passing judgment against addicts, I'm sympathetic for all who are trapped in whatever substance abuse hell they are in. Heroin addiction is not funny, but David Cross is a funny comedian. Hey, he doesn't hate you, people, he's just doing the job of his choice. I prefer him be a comedian, rather than he be a cop, or a soldier.

[blindtheye]

@MrDorkusMaximus You make no sense dude. No one said anything about being offended and news flash he just said he's done it. Cop or a soldier...??? WTF lay off the heroin

[squfucs]

where is all the heroin!!!!!!!! 

[Kavinel]

epic