Gifted Youngster Sells Cookies To Buy Attack Ad

[Penguinz13989]

I'd rape that bitch and set her hair on fire in the name of everything

[SMMsideproject]

"You can make a lie sound like the truth if you say it over and over and over again." Bill O'Reilly clearly uses this tactic.

[ladylucks101]

Sadly, it did work

[GnosticAtheist]

@ladylucks101 Dont worry, it did not matter one bit who your corporate masters ellect as their spokesperson.

Well, perhaps DRE 700 could have done some actual change. If it wanted to.

[bombangle]

that is my favorte opening

[SuperWarking]

@bombangle I can't wait for the ones later this year

[bombangle]

@SuperWarking they aren't as good as this one

[SuperWarking]

@bombangle You don't think so? I truly think given the demographics of those running this year, The Onion can definetly work their magic here

[bombangle]

@SuperWarking the vids are good but the opening isn't as epic

[SuperWarking]

@bombangle Hear ya there....Not sure if The Onion has new writers or what, but speaking for myself it really is not as entertaining as it used to be

[bombangle]

@SuperWarking they mostlikely do

[taybayturtle]

thumbs up if you read the headlines at the bottom :D

[Roblox901143]

Awwwwwwwwww so cute! <3

Well done Emily! I would of given you $100 if I lived near you!

[MasterChafed]

@Roblox901143 you do know that the onion news network is not real news right?

[Xbox4lifeLive]

@Roblox901143 PayPall:)

[Roblox901143]

@Xbox4lifeLive It's too late now. Obama won.

[CrazedNovaProduction]

I thought this was hilarious, yet, I feel Obama is an incompetent leader.

[MrUtopia77]

@CrazedNovaProduction i had my doubts when he entered office, but obama's done a ton since he's entered office, i'm actually voting for him 2012 (couldn't yet vote on 2008)

[CrazedNovaProduction]

@MrUtopia77 Im not going to argue with you.

[Glowsticks1000]

emily for president

[H3lbrixs360s]

@james1200 its spelt "humourless" moron

[H3lbrixs360s]

@fr0nage ye,you hide behind your screen asshole,yes i noticed.Your pathetic.

[terozen]

@H3lbrixs360s It's spelled "You're", moron. Hurr, I feel stupider just from reading your grammar ;(

[LiberalImperalist]

She actually quoted Hitler talking about the add proccess lol

[masterrob321]

you can make a lie sound like the truth if you say it over and over again hahahah thats so true

[Heato3N]

People of The Internet hear me.

THIS IS A SATIRE.

just wanted to clear the air.

[ZenSeizure]

@Heato3N Don't say that! I love it when it fools idiots!

[Heato3N]

@ZenSeizure Ha ha, yeah your right i should keep my mouth shut. lol :)

[gredangeo]

@Heato3N yeah dude, don't spoil it. Every year there's a new branch of people who just discovered the Onion and fell for it. :)

[theapollomoonlanding]

I wish McCain was President.

[H3lbrixs360s]

Stupid little girl,She is far to young to know whats going on.Obama is one of the worst presidents EVER.What has he actually done for America? Nothing,just got it into more debt.No way should a 8yr old girl be able to do this.The government have obviously gave her family to make this up,no 8yr old can speak that way

[jeezusallahchrist]

@H3lbrixs360s you're a complete mindless idiot. Name one president who hasn't been controlled by the illuminati and banking cartels.....

[james1200]

@H3lbrixs360s You are a perfect example of a humorless, old, out of touch teabagging idiot. I'm seriously embarrassed for you.

[fr0nage]

@H3lbrixs360s

You're an idiot and should go die.

[AuskaNeumaki]

It worked

[pkowen56]

So this is why obama won wow........ Thanks alot now we will be in debt for the next 300 years.

[ThePotatomanrules]

@pkowen56 Wow, you don't know much about economics and politics, do you?

[felipemelendez345]

What a bitch lol

[chrizgoodwin]

liberal version of michele bachmann?

[coolnameize]

If all girl's were this smart....

[juggaloMEMO]

Ice cube

[noneurbuisness777]

lmao 2:30 Self employed man caught masturbating on the job

[vjm3]

"You can make a lie sound like the truth if you say it over and over and over again!"

Suddely I want to kill this little girl, and everyone else who believes the ends justify the means. Or maybe I'm looking at this all wrong. Maybe I should join her, and destroy anything patriotic and admirable about America, that way we fall into oblivion that much quicker, so less good innocent people are taken advantage of by morons like her!

Socialism for America because really we can trust government.

[tarantulady]

It's fucking Youtube Comments, not a political forum. Jesus H Christ.

[Kilonoid]

@tarantulady Not to sound dumb or anything, but what does the "H" mean in that?

[GeneralGiantPanda]

@Kilonoid Nothing. It just adds spice to it and usually makes it more humerous.

[yinzjagoffs]

Search and watch "The War on Lemonade Stands! Nanny of the Month"

[yinzjagoffs]

She might change her mind about having any faith in politics after her lemonade stand gets raided by the IRS.

[Strava124]

She is like a political version of WBC

[eelnomtih]

I like how they wrapped this one up

[bannanadk]

OMG #ROFL

[CoreyL11]

@MrMasterMinecraftMan I know! Everyone always says that like he isn't do anything and shit like that. Like how has he not done anything. The war in Iraq is over... When we had that oil spill, he actually went down to the gulf to prove that it was safe to go there. Where was Bush when Hurricane Katrina happened? Nowhere to be found. What about on 9/11? Nowhere to be found. Obama's not gonna clean up after 8 years of Bush in one term. That's just unrealistic. But he's doing a good job so far

[cdogftw]

@CoreyL11 you must have missed that great moment during the 9/11 aftermath when Bush stood up next to a firefighter and put his arm around him on the rubble of the towers and shouted through a megaphone to a croud of people those famous words "I can hear you, the rest of the world hears you, and the people who knocked these buildings down will hear all of us soon." probably didn't show it on hardball or whatever anti-Bush source you get your news from.

[mrjo0e1]

@CoreyL11 obama has spent more in 2 years then bush in all 8 years now how does that make sense if obama is doing a good job?

[Tw1St3DSt33L]

@mrjo0e1 good point, you should run, things will change

[NickyAmerica]

@chrizgoodwin

Oh here we go "Blame Bush"

Obama has been president for over half a term, Obama didn't fix shit in the 100 days he promised, he only made it worse.

Thinks are worse still.

[chrizgoodwin]

@NickyAmerica 'cause he can't fix it because it's fucked so bad. Think of the Bush agenda as a fuck off huge freight train. Once it gets to the place it needs to stop it takes a good few miles for it to come to a halt.. Obama applies the breaks causing sparks to fly everywhere these sparks are all the money that Obama is having to spend to decrease the momentum of the Bush Agenda.

[NickyAmerica]

@chrizgoodwin

To bad the train was carrying oil and obama lit it on fire, while taking credit for killing everyone bin laden and blaming it on everyone but himself.

[Shadow99052]

@NickyAmerica

I hate when people like you bring politics to everything. No body likes it.

[XrayXD22]

lol, i'd support the little girl :D

[RichardGrantV]

Stupid damn girl screwed us all.

[bannanadk]

This is #FAKE but i am soooo #LOL ING!!!

[CoreyL11]

@bannanadk haha of course it's fake... It's the Onion

[illincrux]

I'm pretty damn positive things would be a thousand times worse if mccain had won...

[Strang3rDanger]

Bet now shes sorry, after she sees what kind of crap president Obama has been/

[DoinUrMom1986]

Fuck you Emily Anderson thats why Obama won you bitch!

[AfreekaLIVE]

ummmm.....He does a great job exposing the european mind. THIS TYPE OF BEHAVIOR IS...typically REWARDED...and in fact, it's how amerikkka was built.

He is ALWAYS good for some comedic relief while working to survive in this shystem!

M.E.

[KronossClockwork]

81 people voted for Mccain... or Obama for that matter.

[weraininmud]

OMG IT WORKED

[ActorFlautista]

I'm going to hire her for my next student government campaign!

[TheAppitite]

so its that little bitch's fault we got stuck with this shitty ass president. damn her.

[kefer123622]

Obama is a fucking idiot.

[Heliosphan15]

@kefer123622

no he doesn't

[Since1907baby]

funny social critic s these guys

[KrankieV2]

that little bitch should have been shot

[lorofcb2]

@KrankieV2 u do know this is satire right?

[lexilablies65]

I WANTED MC.CAIN TO WIN!

I HATE THE OTHER PREZ

[lovefunpeace]

uploaded on my birthday..and I wanted McCain to win..haha

[tazztt1]

Sounds more like she's talking about Obanana.

[viking977]

mcain is probably her dad or something

[smithtireco]

2:34 look at the bottom heading lol

[smithtireco]

look what she has done..we are now run by a monkey..

[LuluLovesYhu]

"Trend watch, Fat Batman is this years top Halloween costume" I always watch the scrolling words.

[Maasuum]

i like Anabella Anderson better

[marine5546]

@ 1:02- Paid for by Emily Anderson.....HAHAHAHA

[Funbunny1234vid]

F everybody

[giantblue]

Comic sans pamphlets?! GENIUS!

[shaktiIIIgta]

one of my favorites besides the sony gizmo by the onion

[letmecomment]

it worked

[FaithorFire117]

This is the best indictment of the media during the Obama campaign I've ever seen

[Hobinator17]

The irony of the video is that Mccain would hav been a much better president. screw the mainstream media 4 making obama seem like a god

[Shadow99052]

Politics are funny when someone takes it seriously.

[ThefirstDrInsane2U]

That little bitch.It worked

[iansayfol]

haha first junkie

[Konishi010]

thats amazing

[NielsHammersMusic]

true fan

[Angelblade717]

"Philanderer. Thief-lover. WRONG FOR AMERICA.

Paid for by Emily Anderson! :D" ahahaha xD

[michaelgallardo777]

79 people who disliked this is being payed by john meccain

[SStoge21]

I want to shoot that little bitch!!!

[jerryfinsternumber9]

@litlrose0746 Are you retarded? Have you not been watching the news?

[NoisemakerArrow]

@jerryfinsternumber9 Actually, you'd have to be retarded to watch the news.

[jerryfinsternumber9]

@NoisemakerArrow Touché. But I still stand by my comment in calling litlrose0746 retarded.

[TornSlayer97]

I'd kill my self if I was a pow

[wadwrites]

fuck

[litlrose0746]

That little girl is a freaking genius. It worked didnt it? We now have an awesome kickass black president who seems to be doing things right. :)

[Stormeris]

MCCAIN IS FASIST???? VOTE FOR MCCAIN MCCAIN FTW xDDD

[bassmzero]

It worked

[hellrazor117]

Josef Goebbels (Hitlers chief propagandist) once said "If you tell a big lie often enough,people will believe it..."....This girls is his reincarnation.

[samu3ljr]

I'm sure we'll be seeing more horrible things from that little girl in the future

[phenomenalclassic93]

@samu3ljr you mean greater, not horrible

[HelloHiGoodday]

She is the whole reason that Obama became president...that, and Obama girl...XD

[Zerrith]

touching

[MsLolgeek]

lol an endorsement from rachael ray proves FRIGHTENGLY important for the obama campoaign

[ultimateninjamastah]

All of theonion's videos are fake! (thumb this up so people will stop making stupid comments

[kennyembry]

And Also, yeah, that little kid always uses the put out to pasture attack on people I suppose. If it wasn't her parents that leaves church or her teacher that taught her that phrase. If you're a candidate and someone says that about you then just remember that you can sue for age discrimination and I think the senior members of the supreme court may award you a few dollars if the case goes there. I'd like to hear a Dem say they approve this message. Little runt should be put into time out!!

[MsLolgeek]

@kennyembry fake news dude. its ok i thought the mac wheel laptop was real

[tufftandle]

@kennyembry

hey, calm down haha she's an actress :P

[Shadow99052]

@kennyembry

This video is a joke. Its so funny when idiots like you forgot this is a JOKE.

[kennyembry]

@Shadow99052 I know what it was but I try to take up for veterans that are being made fun of whenever I can, sure there's a huge group of men and woman that probably wouldn't mind. I try to over compensate in my patriotism for my own benefit to counter my feelings that our society is going down the tubes like this ad shows. I NEVER care what anyone thinks of my tons of posts on here, yaawho, nsn, or all over the web, just me.

[zellmer]

It's line for line with the republican's current attack ads they're spewing these past few months.

[rafvne2]

I'm surprised that no one mentioned the clever play on the title "Beyond facts"... sounds like Fox news should adopt this title... he he he...

[Silentsam7532]

That little girl is fucking hillarious!

[stevemacaque]

I lold when she said that he was a pussy for trying to kill himself as POW

thats so fucked up

[bubba45as]

mcain's a liar so buy my cookies



[bigd8849]

so this is why mccain lost

[lalona37]

hahaha selling cookies, yeah right,

[alulu8]

Pure Hilarity.

[KiyoshiAugustus]

"Yes we can... Yes we can... Yes we can!" lol

[RomZruleTeHworld]

mccain should LIBEL this girl

[kateoflaherty]

@RomZruleTeHworld lol

[RomZruleTeHworld]

say thankyou, barack!

[746c]

I kind of think McCain would have been more cut out for the job now.

[ddranimestyle]

1:28 the scrolling words.

[Inediblehulk]

So THIS is why Obama won. I thought it was because Oprah commanded it. Thanks for reporting REAL American history, ONN, and setting things straight again!

[Chibikyon13]

oh, my gawd, the golden condom XD What happens to the 4 that don't win the grand prize?

[lovelee182]

crazy thing,this little girl is smarter than most voters i kno.even if she is a bit evil.

[xseb5x]

@jackthay hahahahahahahahga true

[kennyembry]

That's american polictics, he that can sling the most crap wins! With so many of Dems Elitedom fallin hard from grace, they've got to do something drastic to paint a bad picture of Reps. This little girl has clearly been coached and trained to say these bad things about an honored POW. Her parents should be put in prison. Little girls should be taught things like "you should not lie" or "give flase witness against others." She'll be turing tricks before she's 15, with her parents approval!

[KDALove]

@kennyembry You don't watch The Onion, do you?

[reeboonree]

@kennyembry u do realize this is a joke and that it is fake news dont u? ....u cunt its all for fun and games chill your raging boner for the conservative way of life and try to have fun and get passed the politics...again u cunt

[kennyembry]

@reeboonree Your mother should of passed you but she didn't so now we've got to reply and let you know my comments aren't just diarreah of the idiots like you but are laid out constantly with no profane abuse at 100K keystrokes on messg posting boards regardless of if the subject is real or fake to let radical losers like you know you are societies lowest garbage! I'm not sure what you are, I don't think you have either wood nor you other description of me you're just a lost IT!

[reeboonree]

@kennyembry lol yeah

[reeboonree]

@kennyembry kill

[Darrylizer1]

The crawl at the bottom is hilarious. "Self employed man caught masturbating on the job."

[kennyembry]

@Darrylizer1 What about the condom award isn't that fitting. This mother's daughter will be winning one when she's a teenager prostituiting on the same corner if her mom is smart enough and as fast as she is at baking all those cookies.

[xfronwenzyoucamex]

if that was a real ad I'm sure Obama would have won 99%

[gilkwad]

1:46 *cough* no wonder obama won

[randomytcommentuser]

EMILY ANDERSON FOR 2032 DICTATOR OF THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA@@@ (She will be over 35 by then).

[jahath]

hahahahaha this girl had no idea she was supporting a buffoon.

[CAZekany]

Beyond the Facts is always so depressing...

[darknight13]

Too bad Obama has already brought our country 2 trillion dollars deeper into debt with his STIMULUS PACKAGE

[Gatorsguy92]

@darknight13 Too bad Bush and any other GOP member in office would only dig the deficit deeper by slashing taxes incredibly low, especially on the rich and corporations, thus destroying any chance for the government to create income. You see, financial 101, to pay off debt, you need money, and to get money, you will need some source of income...

[darknight13]

@Gatorsguy92

You have no proof they would do that if they were in office. Also Obama was the one who had the stimulus package bail out BIG RICH CORPORATIONS instead of the PUBLIC who really need it to get out of debt so they can start spending money again

[tehhornyhippo]

so a 5 year old knows more about politics then half the people in the govornment

[Gatorsguy92]

@tehhornyhippo and you who criticizes our political landscape, can't correctly spell government?

[RandomGuy0987]

I guess it worked.

[IcyScythe]

rofl I cant believe that put a Goebbels quote in the mouth of a little girl hahahaha

[revolt1492]

I wish my daughter could follow her example lol

[Morganb00]

"McCain is a liar, so buy my cookies!" XD loser head

[Mikanismable]

'Im sure we'll be seeing horrible things from that little girl in the future" - L M F A O!!

[fallature]

good gurl :)

[zellmer]

Tried to commit suicide twice?!!? Yet this devil still tries to say he has good christian values?!?!?! March to congress and show him what christians do to those types!!

[phillyeagles217]

ahh the 8 pm bedtime, except fot monday night football

[YesIm10]

Wow, shes like a teabagger, but a democrat O.o

[YesIm10]

@YesIm10 Wait, I take that back. No teabagger has an IQ near the IQ of an 8 year old.

[OmegaLesPaul]

@YesIm10 You mean a radical liberal? Increase your vocab brah.

[snorkelgear]

little bitch. bet her parents didnt spank her as a kid.

[heeropat]

at 1:09 read the bottem headline xD!!!!