Shit Christians Say to Atheists

[liah14]

I have a personal relationship with Jesus it's not a religion !!!! lloooooool. Hahahahaha I can't believe I actually once spoke like this :/

[matthelion]

HAHA!!! The banana!

[MsRobotRock]

so true~



[IDontWantYourCereal]

shit atheists dont give a fuck about.

[SGThibakusha]

I live in a very religious community. I'm unable to even communicate because of how closeminded and ignorant they are!

[katemckay3]

Not all Christians are ignorant and naive. A good christian would never judge another, no matter what their religion is. Obviously you have the wrong idea about us. 

[22FretsIsNotEnough]

@katemckay3 I don't care what you believe in, as long as you stay out of politics and don't kill anyone. 

[PaltryFreD]

"The Banana."

[BareBeautyXx]

"This is going to burn you if it touches your skin, ah ah!!" bahahaha classic shitt.

[DarkManagerful]

@Ziztur there is this girl in my school who looks just like you except *student* and i like her, and you remind me of her....yup and by the way cool vid ... and Amen ;)

[kiwichickchur]

im a christian and i have never said shit like, 'if evolution existed, dogs would be giving birth to cats'. that's just messed up.

[monkeyman2o11]

,,, i will pray for yall

[JoshSimonCanada]

@ladyofBammare i find it hilarious how you put Jewish and Atheist before Christian when your talking about who forces their beliefs on one another. And Buddhists do not preach. You should check where your getting your info. I feel like youl find that it came right out of your ass.

[facinelli3944]

im atheists and i HATE when people push Christianity on me -_- they dont see my saying they shoudnt believe in their god -__-

[TheSadClock]

2:25

"im a Atheist"

"The Banana"

"...?"

[TheFirstBlackEmoKid]

@TheSadClock

Christians used that once to prove that the universe is fine tuned for humans, but what they didn't know is that it was specially bred by humans for consumption.

[LadyofBammare]

I'm Christian and my best friend is Atheist.

Everyone forces their beliefs onto one another- be it Jewish, Atheist, Christian, Buddhist, or Wiccan. We need to just be mindful and respectful to one another and get on with our lives- people have the liberty to believe what they wish and we should respect that.

[Islandershy]

very true and very entertaining :)

[gen1110]

da dogs r having sex

[killuminatiplz]

i really get it around christmas

[BiohazardBunney]

I like all the butthurt christians who don't want to admit christians say this.

[BiohazardBunney]

I want your hat.

[gymrat7847]

the one i got was "the bible is true because it says its true".

[LiberalAtheistChick]

FYI Hitler was not an atheist!! I always have people tell me that. And the video wasn't funny.

[dennisngocho]

i didn't laugh...

[PeterMusicEater]

you are super annoying and ignorant

[ChrisHayesArt]

My religion teacher actually said ''atheism is a good phase for a while'' > i wanted to scream f@#k you bitch... but that would have been intolerant of her profound worldview

[vevevededede]

i think this video shows how close minded ignorant you are, as opposed to the christian community.

[skrie]

Hehehe :D Wow that was so much win XD, Can I just leave my marriage proposal here ?

[Jayjon81]

I've gotten the: "So, you worship Satan?" lol

[metajend]

HAHAHA i have heard ALL of these - i love it. also, you make me want access to a pulpit. very "i am leader" looking. have to hand it to 'em, christians know their shit when it comes to symbolic authority.

[cwcnoah10]

its funny how untrue this is

[MichyEYE]

@cwcnoah10 It's funny how I've had every single one of these things said to me, which makes it actually pretty true.

[DavidLaTarjet]

"The banana."

[UlisesGirl]

"I think that, deep down, you really believe" - OMG. That one drives me BONKERS - get it all the time.

[Tidwell2161h]

All of these things have been said to me... So true

[bluedaisy211]

Awesome video. It's surprising to me that we haven't evolved and people still have evangelical views towards religion in this country.

[ThatCoolChexMixGirl]

Do you think your cool because one your atheist and two your wearing a dead animal on your head.

[pixiekorigal]

@ThatCoolChexMixGirl wow...did anyone say it was real?

[kainen789]

I think my christian girlfriend has said almost all of these to me!!! So sad but true!

[TheSuperGamefreak]

i wanna slap her in her face!

[Rhinogradentian]

Dogs having sex in the background, lol.

[KidRiviera]

And people say Muslims are creepy...

[silverhallheights]

This would be funny if it weren't true. It is really pathetic that this is truely what some folks do say.

[liketribblesomg]

Her voice kinda sounds like Zooey Deschanel's at times...

[TheAnastacia27]

so. freaking. accurate.

[k1tk9t123]

"Yoou cant prove gods not real"

WELL... You cant prove he is real.

[genesismacedo3]

the most stupid video on the net...

[ifihadadime4]

Not all Christian are this stupid and close minded. Some of us are intelligent and believe in science. We don't all take the bible literally, and some of us are even close friends with atheists.

[silverhallheights]

@ifihadadime4 Agreed. But she is poking fun at the so-called evangelical jerks who give Christianity a bad name for the majority of Christians who are loving and tolerant of others of different faiths, and who are educated, intelligent, and, of course, spiritual.

[captainbirchbarkable]

@silverhallheights thanks, we need more realistic people like you

[PhysxTV]

@ifihadadime4 You cannot "believe" in science. Just thought I'd point that out.

[oakaveli]

@ifihadadime4 if you don't take the bible literally, then what's the point of being a Christian???

[JillieStarBean]

@oakaveli That's right. We have to rise up, if you are going to claim Christianity, live that lifestyle out completely. Most people in this world detest Christianity because: 1)They've met a Christian or 2) They haven't met a Christian.

Just think about that for a second. That's really sad.

[loladrienne]

@oakaveli because not everything in the Bible is literal. For example, when talking about judging someone, the bible states "Do not point out the sliver in someone elses eye until you take out the log in yours". Meaning that you cannot judge someone unless you are perfect yourself. Obviously you cant take that entirely literally because no one has actual logs in their eyes. The message, however, is what is important.

[thereligioussnitch]

@ifihadadime4 if you are close friends with an atheist, then you are not a christian. 

[GreenBottleCap]

@thereligioussnitch Yeah... no. That's almost as stupid as this one time this guy said that if I believe in science then I'm not a Christian.

The problem is that you live in the US, and in the US there are evangelic Christians, and evangelic Christians are like that.

[DreamByTheFire]

@ifihadadime4 Yes! My best friend is Christian, and I'm atheist.

[fuckingspitfire]

All of these things, people have said to me -.-

[panecitaxbeso]

@ikov maybe.

[meagannnaliseee]

haha personally i only agree with three of the things she said. i'm not athiest but i don't have a religion either. i don't have a side, but seriously though, how could this (beautiful) world come from nothing created by nothing that mysteriously put tiny cells into nothing to create the big boom? not trying to start an argument, it's just always made me think!

[DaniELrokr]

LOL doggy style at 2:34

[TheKaeCouture]

im a mix lol jk aka JEWISH!

[andreacupcakesx]

"God doesn't believe in atheists." Lmfao

[WesternHaiku]

Atheism and Theism have to do with belief. Gnosticism and Agnosticism have to do with knowledge. I'm an Agnostic Atheist because I don't know whether or not a god/gods exist therefore I don't believe in any. Saying your agnostic doesn't answer the question of whether you believe in a god or not.

[Luckypoolpwns]

Your ignorant and stupid.

Your face looks like an asshole.

Your about as funny as aids.

[mediumawlful]

Christians say,"All atheists will go to Hell",sometimes they even yell it.

[TheSweetwillow19]

ALL ATHEIST WILL GO TO HELL,, REMEMBER THIS COMMENT!

[ikov]

@TheSweetwillow19 your a dick! remember this comment

[ChickenRamen]

Like a broken record. Do they all say the same things?

[TheGarbageQuiltGirl]

I haven't said most of these things, but I am a Christian.

[47vevo]

wait a sec Hitler was a christian don't try to cover up Ur screw ups through out history the most thing Christians fear (LOGIC)

[Mgopro]

@47vevo He was Roman Catholic.

[47vevo]

same shit different smell

[robobrain10000]

Shit just got crazy in the last 40 seconds lol

[veronicacheren]

oh my god 'the banana' i fucking died

[LOGICandREAS0N]

"Shit ignorant people say to atheists."

[thidritoboladao]

@LOGICandREAS0N yeah, thats what the title said :3

[montysoftball]

@LOGICandREAS0N true.... and ignorant people and religious people are synonymous!

[mowkneekah]

@LOGICandREAS0N Is there really a difference?

[LOGICandREAS0N]

@mowkneekah Not really.

[michaelmikelmicc]

One time I told this lady I'm not religious. She said that's okay so long as I have a relationship with Jesus Christ...

[ikov]

@michaelmikelmicc HAHAHAHAH!!



[TheLMELFELDE]

Are those dogs having sex?

[koolkoolkitty13]

I never understood the whole "personal relationship with Jesus." Yeah, and I have a personal relationship... with Zeus, the Greek god of AWESOME.

[damianhenry1992]

WHY DO WHITE PEOPLE LET THEIR DOGS LICK THEM IN THE MOUTH. NASTY LIKE NAS.

[damianhenry1992]

DID ANYBODY SEE THOSE TWO DOGS FUCKING.LOL

[eugene188]

Why do you hate god???

[ikov]

@eugene188 why does everyone keep saying that?

[eugene188]

@ikov i dunno...prolly cuz we've heard it in real life before? or we've seen somebody just dying to say it but holding it back?

[ikov]

@eugene188 hahah I've never heard that before, but then again most of the christians around me know better. :)

[MiniFlakezZ]

2:33 lol that dog is trying to get it in! ;)

[marquee367]

this does not happen farreal lol

[Joseph66678]

Your dog is an atheist.

[therealjammit]

What prevents me from just going out and killing people? The same reason you have. None.

[fearxisxessential]

I'm just agnostic, but most people that find that out assume that being agnostic is the same as being an atheist, and go on a rant about how I should believe in God... It's really annoying.

[MarsManatee]

@fearxisxessential To be fair, most agnostics are atheist and most atheists are agnostic, they answer separate questions about your beliefs, so it's a reasonable guess on their part.

[ikov]

@fearxisxessential most atheists are agnostic dude. it pretty much is the same thing..

[Fudgeguys]

THE BANANA! :L

[thisistrapordie]

HAHAHAHAH Fantastic

[Amandaromerocanepa]

OH

MY

"GOD"

People have said this things to me SOOOO much!! I am agnostic but I really have heard this thousand of times

[XXSybillaXX]

2:34 Wow. Horny dog.

[Rex1234ify]

you should change the title to what religous people say to atheist.... cause im a true christian and i dont say this sh*t to anybody

[AQDecor]

2:33 your dogs are having some fun prayer at that moment!

[AQDecor]

I think you hit them all! Crazy religious people!

[YoungFenix07]

Lol I'm Christian and I've said a Few of these things lol

[KaThYjAmEsHeRe]

SO true lol

[golgotha02]

i like your hat

[TheTrollDoingYourMom]

Hitler wasn't an atheist.

[maialuvstdi]

this is BEYOND accurate..

[chicharinujilla]

horny dogs D:

[NegridoPie]

Impressive video. But I must also compliment that amazing hat. good show!

[EnigmaticRPG]

"What keeps you from going out and just... not killing people?"

...

Not living near people who say this shit on a daily basis.

My grandma's a nice lady but luckily she lives 900+ miles from me. e___e

[kylehspano]

"If evolution were true, we'd see dogs giving birth to cats." If someone actually said that to me, I might have to slap them lol

[silenthillish305]

@kylehspano Well thats "macro evolution" one species birthing another.

[ikov]

@silenthillish305 nnnnnnnnnnno

[geffel]

Great hat.

[shonkey]

Will you pray?

Nope! Not a fucking chance!

[shonkey]

Laughing at the Collegiate Day of Prayer commercial before this video about shit Christians say to Atheists. Religious trolling at its best!

[ArmTheMasses24]

You're so cute. *the evidence is all around you.. Look at this house.. Look at this..dog!* made my night.

[jmyz1991]

2:33 Dogs Humping!!!

[panecitaxbeso]

I laughed so hard...

[btfu62]

lol banana

[hurtmeloveme]

So fucking true lol.

[DivineMovement]

Bitterness is never funny.

[panecitaxbeso]

@DivineMovement I don't think there's anything bitter about this; I've heard a lot of Christians say things like this about Atheists...I'm not an Atheist but I do hear things like this all the time from believers to non-believers.

[tctaylor118]

Look at this dog!

[buickgn1897]

Atheism is for people who can't live with the fact that no one can know everything. They think that by denying what they don't understand, they can be in control. An atheist is like a monkey clinging to a tree, swearing that there is no such thing as a forest....

[panecitaxbeso]

@buickgn1897 In the Bible, to paraphrase, when God decided to wipe out humanity with the Great Flood (Noah's Arc story,) he said he regretted making humans. An omniscient God couldn't hold regret if he is omniscient. If he knows everything that will happen before it happens, he can't have regret. No, I am not an Atheist. However, I do question the idea of an omniscient God. So, I can somewhat see why Atheists would choose Atheism.

[ikov]

@panecitaxbeso its not a choice dude. you either believe in bullshit or you don't

[panecitaxbeso]

@ikov Whethere you believe or don't believe in said bullshit is a choice, dude. i.e. I choose not to follow a religion.

[ikov]

@panecitaxbeso nagh man, you can choose your actions but you can't choose what you believe, no matter how hard i try i can't start believing in unicorns, or god, or any other imaginary creatures.... are we saying the same thing just differently?

[carllito12]

@buickgn1897 Theisms are for people who want to know everything, instead of waiting until we finally figure it out

[MrRemix78]

THE BANANA!!!

[babyblack98]

SORRY BUT REAL,. REAL CHRISTIANS DON'T TALK LIKE THAT

[nerhu59]

@babyblack98 Sorry, I think your CAPSLOCK is broken...

[babyblack98]

@nerhu59 hahahahahah ok i'll fix them thanks

[Ampersand1988]

@babyblack98 Crazy Christians do I can't stand em they're really bunch of hypocrites.

[babyblack98]

@Ampersand1988 good for you

[kyev145]

Oh my goodness. My mother says ALL these things to me... and I'm just agnostic

[ChrisCapulet]

"If evolution were true, we'd see dogs giving birth to cats" LOL! Brilliant paha xD

[hunkyjelly]

@ChrisCapulet no, they are made up of different DNA. therefor not true, with that logic humans can give birth to cats as well

[ChrisCapulet]

@hunkyjelly Dude, idk if you understood this video, but the joke is on the Christians. I am an athiest, I found it FUNNY, I am not asserting that that is possible or true. Moron.

[2bitscrazy]

As a pagan I would touch bibles and scream in a golem voice

"IT BURNS US!"

[MyBloodraven]

she needs to get fucked... badly... xD

[DineAloneRecordsFan]

This is based on an ethnocentric view of christians. Like most atheists in North America, they criticize christianity in north america because its the majority religion. But back where my parents come from, they can be killed for believing in christianity. (this isn't suppose to attack anyone, just to give info on the subject.)

[Darknectar18]

Silly Christians with their fairy tails and ghost stories...

[RAllenTucker]

I resent that I even need a title to identify that I don't embrace a fantasy. Nobody makes titles for people who don't want to own pick-up trucks or don't believe we'll find global peace in their lifetime. I'm an atheist. So what? I was a practicing catholic once, and no one seems to have problem with that. Now that was weird.

[cocoa020]

Good thing I'm agnostic :3

[gullf1sk]

@cocoa020 You're an atheist.

agnostic is a non position.

[P0rt3la]

I laughed at the last bit... the rest? meh

[AnonymouslyVoiced]

"The banana.."

[macaronimick]

look how you let your big dutty dog lick your face. go get some insight on hygene.

[djstonedog]

"the evidence is all around us...just look at this...dog". I laughed out loud at that one.

[xxxRePeNtAgRaMxxx]

I am a christian but personally I don't get angry at athiest or hate them. I mean it makes absolutely no sense to hate for their beliefs.Arrogance is the christians like this but hopefully most truly understand what the bible has told us to love others. I spread love not hate. :)

[finka123456]

@xxxRePeNtAgRaMxxx Cool but as a man of afflicted with OCD i must remind you that atheist is a lack of Beliefs(or partialy)

[rainbowkiss100]

@xxxRePeNtAgRaMxxx excepts the gays but whatever...

[IKillDragonsAllDay]

Dig it.

[TheTweigel612]

not funny. and shes ugly as hell

[ONLYUSEmeSKILLZ]

hitler wasn't an atheist...

[KammacK13]

I <3 Hitler!!!!

[nosferaturoams]

Hahaha that last part happened to me when I was in middle school. I'm an atheist not a satanist. Really people -.-

[0oOSTFUOo0]

I think being an atheist is kind of sad. I'm not christian or anything. I have my own beliefs to understand everything that can't be explained (yet).