Added: 2 years ago
From: jomayc0ck
Views: 248
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  • Thank you! I am 20. x

  • i lol'ed

    how old are you?

  • i don't know much about comedy, but i'd say that wasn't bad

  • You have to leave time from people to laugh at your jokes.. so would be high emphosis on the end gag and pause.

    "Epic" is not what people can relate to and its a bit too "cool" to be used in comedy.

    also looking comdeians like russle howard really have to dress down to be liked! you cant wear what your wearing. reaseach and take a look around, I liked the green hat and suit a bit

    hope this feedback helps, i just wanted to comment, to help you

  • All government officials are incompetent.

    Except for Obama, because he's from my city. :-P

    You gotta add more expressions like you did with, "Well, duh!" And even that, you should play up a little more. If you don't get a laugh with the material, try to get a laugh with the expressions you make.

    Aside from that, I find that overacting works on the short term.

    Since I'm a filthy American, I'll have to take your word about the ad. Though, I found the way you told it funny.

  • and just to clarify: no i didnt hate it, even tho i just about filled the limits of youtubes text comments with that last one ;) the whole fish material isnt worthless imo. but could use a little bit more work... and a bit more "zing" u know..

    keep it up mate! 3/5 for said good/notsogood reasons

  • overall, it wasnt very bad at all. your delivery made me watch thru it, even tho its not really the type of material i usually find interesting. some constructive criticizm tho: u tend to overact just a lil' bit (especially during the opening stuff), aswell as stretching some buildups out for too long, without a real punch.

    since im not from the uk myself, i cant really comment on the "funny-factor"of the governement-chat stuff outro, but it felt a bit like a spacefiller with no actual "jokes"

  • Bad start... again!

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