Jimmy Kimmel Live Monologue From April 21, 2009

[allmightyprincess]

somali pirate ships??

[ohoooh3ad]

alleluia to the first girl

[alex90028]

Thanks for putting the entire monolog on now, hope this will be a regular feature now as I am in europe now for the summer and thru the abc website we would not be able to get it. Had my JK withdrawl, now finally I will be fine .-)

[akaEtoo]

nice, finally posting complete monologues . Thanks :)

[volumedealer1]

Dancing with boredom...Entertainment on TV is boring.

They should just move Jimmy's show up 4 hours earlier.

ABC only has Lost

[ampm91192]

is it just or did jimmy start talking about stupid shit? the writers need to work harder.....

[oxidindigo]

it's just you.

[ampm91192]

ok, so you like the beauty pagents and parezz hilton... it must just be me, i dont like dumb shit...

[oxidindigo]

um, i think beauty pageants and perez hilton are equally revolting, thats why the jokes he makes are funny. you know, humor? you dont seem to have a sense of one, or even the understanding of what a joke is. you dont have to actually be a fan of the subject of the humor. infact most of jimmy's comedy tends to be derisive and sardonic. youre not very bright are you? lol you seem like a young teenager in that your conceptual grasp on simple things like the nature of humor is underdeveloped.

[ampm91192]

lol... i realy feel bad for you, good luck with life

[oxidindigo]

you ran as fast as you could after seeing my comment.. to post THAT? lol im just shocked at how unintelligent you are, if anyone's gonna need luck in life, its you, single digit IQ boy. christ's sake you dont even understand what humor is!! lmao how stupid can someone be?? :D

[ampm91192]

i ran? i didnt wanna waste my time on a piece of shit like you, its funny cuz i find punks like you try to start shit over the internet bcuz they have a low self of steam and have to fight over the computor cuz they are to scared, they know they wouldnt last a minute in real life and i didnt want to hurt your worthless feelings..u r scum buddy, and i love talking to pieces of shit like u, its almost fun, after feeling bad 4 u

[ampm91192]

i wish i could meet you... i think its you that run.. then you gotta get on your computor and try to fight over the internet cuz u just cant handle it... and you probly get picked on and beat up, its not your fault that your fucked up and need your ass kicked to understand... im sorry for you...

[ampm91192]

but u did get a rise out of me so congrats to you.. i wasted my time on your worthless ass

[ampm91192]

is ther anything else you punk bitch? or did i make you relize something?

[props4genu]

I dunno about that guy, but you made -me- realise you don't know basic grammar and thus are in no position to be debating anything.

From a 3rd party perspective, you're a fucking retarded faggot and should stop with the consecutive posting...you arent proving shit with the idle threats, internet tough guy.

lrn2youtube

[ampm91192]

suck my dick faggot

[SwingLeft]

Wait. You want a dude to suck your dick, but HE's the faggot??

[ampm91192]

yep, you pretty smart dumbshit, you want some cock too?

[SwingLeft]

I like chicken, but I'll leave the cock to you.

[YBucket]

Life must be terrible for you if people constantly outsmart you son.

[YBucket]

Your reply actually makes YOU the fagot you are talking about. lol

[eyetookay]

i believe with uncle frank surprisingly...global warming is just natural climate changes that the earth goes through.

[finpank]

but in all fairness , we all know gay is going out of fashion anyway , so it reeeeeeally dosent matter very much.

[ampm91192]

gay is a fashion?

[Boobalopbop]

I think that I believe that opposite marriage should be between a man and a woman like everywhere such as in my country

[brukins]

LOL!

[slamkong]

Fifth to say a number

[eyesack9]

ellen is gonna be on this tommorow =0

[fatehazeem]

fourth.. but the thing is.. what the hell was that second pageant thinkin ?

[FUl0VECk]

i lalalalooove jimmy : )

[UnrelentingAssault]

Agreed. I've always loved Conan and Leno, but since he's been on I've found his monologues, skits, etc. hilarious.

[Kaimosae]

haha! they started putting the entire monologue up! omg!