Paper Heart - A Sub Par Interview with Demetri Martin

[TheHouseOffice]

I can't believe she actually spit her water on him XD

"It's like an animal acts. When it doesn't know how to communicate, it attacks."

[TheHouseOffice]

I thought this clip was GENIUS.

He's only like this because he likes her enough and is close enough to her, that he can joke around with her.

[possiblyofclouds]

This was really cute and funny, but damn did it feel overly cruel. Even though I love Demetri, I've never seen him tear into someone like this, even they're all obviously in on the joke. Ah, well.

[bjparker0385]

Wow, she was horrible. Demetri justly tore into her like a bad heckler.

[Sic7777]

PWNED

[Johnson28Brother]

Demetri Martin!!<3

[P3dotme]

He is hilarious!

[HoneyIveHeardItAll]

WOW Demetri is way funnier than this girl.

[J14ngL00]

Even when he's being a full-out dick of phallic proportions, Demetri is still fucking hilarious.

[heatbucspies55]

HEy can we trade boyfriends?

Just Kidding.

Sort of.

[Reaping702]

Lol I was kinda hoping for a real interview but this is just as good! anything with Demetri is at worst good

[uglyfaces234]

Omg he is so hilarious funny when he burps and blows it towards her

[AccordingToWillow]

I am in true love with Demetri Martin.

[shahoney]

i started losing it at 2:40 lol :D

[55longboard55]

this should of been in the movie, would of made the movie more interesting,

[OctoKitty]

hahaha, he is so mean in this!! and i totally know he's kidding, but it's hilarious!

[sacredG100]

haha for some people it never happens ( points to charlyne)

[defiantwon33]

"you're so mean and cruel."

"which one?"

[aoecookie]

If you pay attention to the water splash on his hoodie this was edited to come out this way.

[IyongLingkod]

girl, you just didnt know how to get him into the mood for talking, it takes to be smart to do that.

[1mdmack]

I am glad this douches career is over.

[cribnl]

@1mdmack his career is actually not over at all. He's on tour right now

[MrFrigginAwesome]

@1mdmack You realize he's acting right?... And it's not over lol, far from it.

[viperdude281]

@1mdmack You obviously don't like him because you are too stupid to understand that he is joking in this video.

[1mdmack]

@leinzioooo WOW, a personal attack over calling Demitri Martin "just plain." A little overkill leinzy. I am amazed you got to the core of Martin's depth in this interview, pretty impressive. Attack me over "a girl shaking her ass on a video" (shocking) (egads! mate)good counter point. Leinzy this is gonna hurt, Demitri Martin in this interview is just plain and a wanker is something school mate's call each other. grow up. Notice nothing personal and nothing negative about Martin. learn

[1mdmack]

Genius let's not throw that word out there. He's just plain. If you are into plain he's your man. Genius, probably an overstatement.

[leonzioooo]

@1mdmack How can you say Demitri Martin is "just plain"? He is the smartest comedian out there. Of course not everybody is clever enough to understand his humor, that's part of being a genius. For example, I don’t really expect a guy like you, who has his favorites in his channel packed with videos of a girl shaking her ass, to truly grasp the level of depth and geniality Demitri is delivering. Let me put it in a "plain" way you can understand: You Are Just A Wanker, mate.

[lonelygnome1]

lol wow this is awesome.

[noslen2010]

I really hope this is scripted because if not what a dick.

[TripleD20]

I dont think his stuff if funny. He's good at being an ass, but when hes not making fun of someone, he's not funny.

[NicholeMarley]

i liked that movie, but i was cofused the entire time whether it was scripted or not..

[HarpreetIsabel]

Take a trip around the world with and Naughty women mworld5.info

[MrStats0]

This isn't real right?

[XLegitInhalesX]

2:53 "Its" like an animal. Pwn charlene.

[XLegitInhalesX]

Notice that they cut all the parts out of her being a bitch... lul i agree with Demetri. Fail interview.

[XLegitInhalesX]

I think he was Either just drunk, and he didnt really want to be interviewed, or charlene started to get an attitude cause she couldnt differentiate between his ingenious sarcasm and and actual insults. So she basically started being a bitch.

[bellyman12]

its set up and a joke

[AsiaCullen]

Is he supposed to act like this? Because I really hope demetri isn't actually a jerk. I love him and he seems like such a great person whenever he performs.

[owenhunt]

@AsiaCullen Hmm... The pre-amble to the interviews suggests he was indeed off par. For clues to whether he is a lovely person or not, see his performances on screen.

For my part, I see him as off-colour and lacking in presence. Most of his jokes are appreciated for their ingenuity than their telling. He's nearing 40 and has yet to learn how to deliver. As a hopeful comedian myself, I feel for the man. He has made a lot of money despite his aloof persona, so maybe my sympathy is misplaced?

[AsiaCullen]

@owenhunt I can kind of agree with that. I mean, some of his jokes are both funny and genius. I think thats his humor: so genius its hilarious. If youve seen his "If I"s, those are mostly just showcasing his incredible intelligence, with some humor. I think his presence is great, but sometimes I also have to question if his title as a "comedian" when hes merely showing how smart he is. Regardless, hes extremely entertaining.

[cinziakay]

Awwwwww

He's so mean to Charlene ))):

I thought she was really cute in this though hahahahaa

Demetri is always the best

[hghalo]

I've never seen Demetri Martin act like a jerk, yet he's still hilarious.

[jakeisawesome91]

lol.

"somewhat" insulting?

[theblooster]

i love how he can keep a straight face

[alazurtegui08]

Thumbs Up - I Love This!!

[raykaelin]

I want to pull out my teeth with a kitchen knife...yeah, it'll hurt but...

[BboyROGERthat]

This is hilarious! Check out some of the other interviews haha

[molesticles]

I meant Knocked Up...

[molesticles]

She was in Superbad...

[XxdelieishdellaxX]

bahahaha, awwh poor thing.

[AcousticGuitarJoe]

"Really well worded question."

"Very"

There is a retarded guy at work that you actually remind me of, he use to talk like this.

[casper7319]

i love demetri martin!

[pganton]

"Love: anything on it? On that toptic? Got... got something?"

"Really well-worded question."

[Xxnicoroxxx]

I luv this. It's so cute

[exh6192]

Demitri made this chick his bitch!! ha ha ha....I bet Micheal Cera was pissed LOL

[FancyPonce]

Ahaha this is great. If you think demetri is an asshole from this video you obviously haven't seen him in any real interviews or anything... He's just playing along and being the comedic genius he is. Check out "if I", it will blow your mind.

[AcousticGuitarJoe]

@FancyPonce

Yes I think he is an ass hole just by looking at him makes me want to beat the hell out of him. I don't give a fuck if he is any sort of "comedic" genius or what ever the hell. His face alone makes me want to beat the shit out of him. Its just one of those retarded baby faces that has cocky ass hole written all over it.

Maybe I should make a punching bag with his face on it, it would sell millions!

[mudkipman802]

@FancyPonce dude, "if i" is amazing

[mandocoustic]

@ AcousticGuitarJoe: and clearly you're smarter too, when you write that you're funnier "then" him.

[abyssoffortitude]

@rubyhaleybenjamin  The real one or Jake M. Johnson playing him?? cause Jake M. Johnson plays the director in the movie. :) and yes, he IS awesome.

[DoobyMastah]

I love Charlene Yi xD

[ItstheMelmann]

rofl I love him. XD

[AcousticGuitarJoe]

@ Everyone, im fucking more funny then this douche.

[miklitov23]

@AcousticGuitarJoe that's how dmetri marten shits around faggot and no i bet you're not you don't get more original than demtri cuz you'd be in television if you were

[AcousticGuitarJoe]

@miklitov23 Ouch those are fighting words "faggot"

Name a time and place and supply me with money and I'll be glad to kick your ass! :)

[miklitov23]

@AcousticGuitarJoe you can't kick my ass even if i did give you a time and a place and some money which is kind of stupid to ask for over the internet in the comment's section of youtube

[AcousticGuitarJoe]

@miklitov23

So confident yet so fearful, I feel I have the right to laugh at my own comment. L O L!

[miklitov23]

@AcousticGuitarJoe you really have violent anger issues based on your reply to fancyponce. wow really good judgement of character there without even seeing me fearful is wrong because i'm not scared of someone who i can beat the shit out of i just don't choose to resort to violence cause i'm not an animal i know how to communicate through words (demetri martin joke just to piss you off) besides it's not my style to go all out in a fight if i did you'd be knocked in a punch

[AcousticGuitarJoe]

@miklitov23 Whoa! Someone didn't eat their breakfast and is a little cranky!

[miklitov23]

@AcousticGuitarJoe you need to see a shrink...

[AcousticGuitarJoe]

@miklitov23 Because I said you didn't eat your breakfast? Hmm.. Rofl

[miklitov23]

@AcousticGuitarJoe no because you suffer of delusion and you're probably a psycho serial killer based on your violent rants

[AcousticGuitarJoe]

@miklitov23 Dido. LOL

[owenhunt]

@miklitov23 Hmm... Just to inform you, your first comment is blitzed with stupidity. It took Demetri until his thirties to attain televisual fame. AGJ could be as young as 16 and making these comment, and could well ursurp the likes of Martin from his comedy pedestal.

Fans of clever comedians and musicians are commonly as biggoted and asinine as yourself. My theory is that by understanding clever jokes or music it is possible to rationalise yourself as clever.

[miklitov23]

@owenhunt Nice theory but incorrect i just want a good laugh. Your reply is hurtful just like mine and acoustic's we gain the confidence of being spiteful and outspoken because we don't know each other and it's over the internet what's the harm right? you wouldn't say something like this to someone in person. You weren't involved in our feud yet you took the time to write this which only tells me we're not much different if i'm so biggoted and asinine for replying vigorously then what are you?

[owenhunt]

@miklitov23 Nice try, but it wasn't even your feud to begin with. In fact, it makes your comment all the more asinine that it was made after "acoustics" had already been lampooned.

"that's how dmetri marten shits around faggot and no i bet you're not you don't get more original than demtri cuz you'd be in television if you were"

My rebuttal to you was actually quite pertinent and less caustic than your own, and would not be confrontational in real life, it would be polemic.

[miklitov23]

@owenhunt Stop trying so hard to sound smart seriously and I saw your videos you're kind of a retard. It wasn't my feud to begin with if it was stupid of me to reply to some feud that wasn't mine then what the hell are you doing right now. I think it's confrontational because you scrolled all the way back to old comments probably looking for a fight cuz you got bored or something so i don't really plan on talking to you any longer.

[owenhunt]

@miklitov23 Wow. I'm no retard; my Youtube videos are mainly posts for a shared project called 'Chartjackers', which you can look view on Youtube, and the rest are mainly jokey videos for my girlfriend which may be hard to understand because of the accent, although she is American and understands me.

I scrolled back to the old comments indeed out of boredom, I'm sure, but only to see if your invective was justified. I found out it wasn't. Anyone is allowed to oppose someone who comes across..

[owenhunt]

@miklitov23 ..as an asshole on a Youtube vid. The fact that this person could be a teenager and potentially better than Demetri stands to reason, unlikely as it is, and the post was made mainly to express this.

I insulted you because your comment that I quoted used profanities to needless effect. The comment that this person would be on television nessecarily if they were funnier than Demetri was flawed, expressed vulgarly and needed reproach, whcih I gave. You seem unintelligent to me. Bye

[lleanamarie]

it's like an animal....lol

[honkhonkhonkwtfhonk]

Demetri Martin #FTW

[AcousticGuitarJoe]

I want to punch him the fucking face. I feel like it, one of those people I just want to break his nose so I can laugh at him.

[Jamesastonn]

@AcousticGuitarJoe :O how could you hate him!

[babasaki69]

he reminds me of ray

[hipnhappenin]

HAHAHAHA!

"The first time I was really in love was in the 5th grade."

"So what happened with the 5th grader?"

"I was in 5th grade too. It's not like I was in love with a 5th grader last year."

These interviews are funny...I remember getting bored 1/4 way into the movie...Were these in the movie?

[TheGMade]

"it's like road rules or something like that"

[brassmnky123]

heey what does he say at 0:43-0:46???

[hipnhappenin]

@brassmnky123

"What? Are you driving around in a Winnebago. It's like Road Rules or something like that?"

[MAKEITWORK]

FUCK i love Demetri Martin.

[brassmnky123]

hahah hilariousbut what does he say at 0:43??

[DrAznmuff]

hahahaha demetri.

[Pavlovscat567]

This guy owes me 5$.

[XKhlodi]

thats a camera hidden and he knew about it

[Hennek3]

just saw demetri live at ucf today... one of the funniest shows ive been to. His tv show doesnt compare to his live performances

[youngprofessional]

lol the burp and blow, i do that sometimes, its instinctual

[likemike06]

His jokes are so funny on camera, but he must be a pain in the ass to actually hang out with.

[elfengal]

What an asshole

[KilgoreTrout4292]

Dude she was in the Man Man "Rabbit Habits" video!

[Chefsunnyg]

that was perfect why isnt that in the movie!

[ellexsea]

drink up if you're a dork.

[mslovelyeyes0]

This is funny. And its acted. Hes not that mean.

[Rodney17302]

lmao, this was hilarious... Demetri is awesome

[chipotlee90]

"you know usually animals when they dont know how to communicate they get in self defense and attack" lmao

[DinoCadet]

i dont think this is acted, hes mean

[jeteyes500]

LMAO HAHAHA!!! oh man, dude... Demetri is hilarious! man, historical and such a genius! wait... he was just playing around right? that's so friggin' funny... the whole time i was laughing... specially 2:06

[AcousticGuitarJoe]

@jeteyes500

Retard speaking, sorry Demetri if you read this comment. What is historical about this ha?

[jeteyes500]

@AcousticGuitarJoe hehehe sry i meant to say hysterical bahaha!!! idk how i got historical into it... XD DEMETRI!!! ROFLMAO!!!

[PHILLIPS99999]

fuck the woman is annoying, everything he said true! was she acting dull?

[theLikesofme3]

was he being for real in this? if so, he's not just funny./. seriously mean, and i'm disappointed in knowing that he actually would model his own version of simon cowel. what a jerk.

[lkmrn325]

Brilliant.

Just. Plain. Brilliant.

[abbeyisapimp]

hahaha, i freakin' love demetri. and i just noticed what he did at 1:32 after watching this like, 80 times. haha :)

[foreverremembered]

lol i looooooove him!

[AdrienneAce]

Gotta love Demetri.

[KaylaRocks222]

LMFAO. i fucking love this man.

[xananadu]

LMAO @1:32

[hornetpalooza]

Hehe. Gotta love Demetri. Even his tough guy act is adorable in a weird way.

[dboon321]

At the 1:46 mark, she has already "spit" on him. Look at his shirt. Then it goes back to before she "spat (my word)."  No big deal at all; just an observation.

[dboon321]

"You're so mean and cruel!"

"Which one?"

Ha Ha Ha! Dude is my new hero.

[neonblacklight]

"it's like an animal, when it doesn't know how to communicate, it attacks."

hahaha!

[KaylaRocks222]

L-M-A-O that was AMAZING "its like an animal, when it doesnt know how to communicate, it attacks"

[FreshandFancyFree]

Interesting how he did that. Transformed from lovable dork to sarcastic prick.

By the way, I'm kidding. :3 This interview made me choke on my soda from laughter~

[sAndyTV]

"...7, sarcasm"

I love how just deadpans the whole thing.

[touchmonkey93]

i love when he burps and blows it in her face lmao!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[StealingAutumn]

was that real?

[sk8rdman]

who cares, it left me in stitches lol.

[DancePetunia]

LOL, no.

[APFCommish]

Freakin brilliant. Demetri should be more of a hardass

[annaeeee]

omg hilarious i love them both

[veritasaequitas67]

i know this is a mockumentary, so i'm assuming all the interviews are completely impromptu... demetri's asshole portrayal is brilliant.

[fanofewan]

Was he being racist?

[CujoHasRabies]

LOL

hysterically brilliant!

[shallwethen]

this interview is just a joke right?

[gu1t4rk1dds3v3n7]

demetri martin is halarious

[smatal]

lmaooooo lmao lmao lmao lmao

[abyssoffortitude]

I LOVED this. And the part where she spit water was awesome. its like annoying an older brother or someone just close to you and you can be stupid like that. BUT notice @1:28 he has the spit on his shirt. You can tell what order things were filmed. they edited that in the middle when it really was AFTER she had spit on him. lol.

[elANDR3W]

asshole!

[DeLarger]

6. Defensiveness - Best 1

[greenspacedog]

xD Demetri Martin is so awesome.

[delt01]

hahaha that was so uncalled for!!!

(and Charlyne is really cute too)

[starblinx]

I'm gonna pretend that his hatred is real. Because this is awesome.

She pisses me off from the first 25 seconds.

[nissen1221]

Demetri is the man!!!

[hotline9292]

Gosh! ARE ANY OF THE PEOPLE THAT SHE IS INTERVIEWING NORMAL?!

[DarkSunGod]

This wasn't scripted, but she knew what he was going to do because it was an in joke between them.

[sarey226]

"maybe you're not doing anything wrong..."..."no actually you're probably doing alot wrong now that i think about it"...hahaha he's so hilarious (and very cute)

[JayceeCommentary]

he looks like he just got his wisdom teeth taken out.

but he's so funny

[linzymack]

lmao that was so messed up i think she's adorable!

[tinymarina]

he's obviously teasing her the whole time. especially if they are friends in real life.

[RadioactiveChris]

most of these interviews are just ok. the one with rob huebel is the funniest

[officercivilian]

did anybody else notice that when he was talking about the retarded girl the water from when she spit on him was on his jacket and she hasn't spit on him yet?!?!!? o

[polishpunk911]

yeah, also when he says "for me, true love does exist"

[abyssoffortitude]

hahahha YEP! JUST commented about it too! LOL!

[wuzcloopin]

If this was edited out, the real movie must be hilarious

[coconutgrove8]

1:24-1:27 best part

[redsox3906]

hes not sub par just hilarious

[xpatrickstumpslovex]

HAHAHAHAHAHA

[Bluehawk2008]

This interview was better than the entire film.

[SoloBoyDjango]

that guy is hilarious :D

[nerdpanda]

wow, I would say that's harsh, but that seems to soft to describe him.

[Shaolinwill]

The only thing subpar in this video is Charlyne's inability to carry through a decent conversation without splurting out sentence fragments like a senior citizen with Alzheimer's.

Don't blame Michael Cera for splitting up with her. I'd hate to be associated with such a hideous social misfit as well.

[GADNAMMIT]

It's all a joke. Seriously. I mean, excellent editing - multiple camera angles...it's pretty obvious it's a skit.

Charlyne is playing a character, as is Demetri. Just let it slide.

[JBazzleRedux]

Oh man, at first I was heartbroken that my comedic hero was such an asshole (I thought he was drunk or something). I'm glad this is scripted :P.

[1991stacy]

They never dated