Ode To The Proud And Self-Important Slapper (2005) by Sir Steven Ilchev the Brontopotamus

[scousedom]

You can tell from the twang that you're from Knowsley somewhere & putting on

your very bestest beatles accent. You're (allegedly) 36 right ? People just don't talk like that anymore !

Digging the reverse Xavier look though

[polperro04]

Scousedom, I was actually hatched in Kirkdale (resided in Newman Street until I was six), spent some time in Sefton (Lunt Road), Sefton Park (Sydenham Avenue) and Knotty Ash (Finch Lane), then a year in Knowsley (Syders Grove), but was predominantly reared in Childwall (Wallsingham Road, Dunbabin Road and eventually stopping at Rudston Road) until 1990 when I went to Leeds University to do my English BA Hons degree.

[polperro04]

Since then I have also resided in Lyme Regis, Dorchester, Torquay, Bembridge, and have been based in Staffordshire for nearly eight years. I am indeed 36. Turning 37 in August. How the dickens did you figure that one out that, kind Sir/Madam?????