Zach Galifianakis Stand Up from 1999

[mrkpg08]

Wow he really refined his style and delivery since then...

[splanners4534]

Zach G. - Making fat jesus jokes since the olden days :)

[pjlurker420]

So good.

[sunsty1e]

awsome

[lordmaster3823]

you also say that he mentioned "you ain't got no pancakes" so that is clearly not from 1999

[siskokidd]

@lordmaster3823 Another internet genius.

[starw0lf]

@lordmaster3823 You aint got no pancake mix was by Zach originally, look it up. The kid in the video with the preacher was referencing him.

[nasbster915]

Thanks, now I know!

[nasbster915]

maybe no one's noticed this...but how is this video from 1999 if he's talking about owning a "Ford Fiesta?" That's a new car that was only released in the states 3 years ago. Anyone's thoughts?

[siskokidd]

@nasbster915 Try a simple search Einstein.

[nasbster915]

thanks dick: I just googled it.

[heberztwinz]

@nasbster915

ford fiesta has been around since 1976

[busha4423]

@nasbster915 35 years they have been around....come out from under the rock

[nasbster915]

@busha4423 I've been around since 1988...and I live in a country where the car hasn't been sold for the past 32 years. But yeah, I just climbed out from under "the" rock. I didn't know my rock was so well known.

[marhill77]

@nasbster915 This is the second time around for the Fiesta. They first were made in the very early 80's I believe.

[MrFiiliipiino]

@nasbster915 You failed, friend.

[markunit72]

@nasbster915 really hope you are joking, go look it up

[GeneralGuitFiddle]

His pretentious illiterate sounds like David Cross to me.

[corzinc]

That wasn't funny at all, him being awkward only worked in the hangover, stand up bot so much....zzzzzzzzzz

[schapadap]

@corzinc this was 12 years ago dumbass... he got his start in standup. Hes so much funnier in Tim and eric than the hangover anyways

[artistsandbox]

god this is the oldest i've ever seen zach doing stand-up. It's like he went up on stage and said, i'm going to suck and it's going to be hilarious

[siskokidd]

@artistsandbox Beautiful, isn't it? He's been pulling the rope-a-dope on audiences his entire career. Multiple layers of funny going on at the same time. Very tough thing to do.

[TheJWally33]

2:20 That's it!!!!!! He did it! He invented Tebowing!!!!

[rhombusskullvsteal]

Jumping off a pizza hut ha, I think he's funnier here. Red stripe cool

[Chipman127]

What Is He Drinking

[gnikcuf888]

Phones had apps in 1999? wt.........?

[airseeker12]

hes skinny compared to today

[BarrysBit]

"I told you...I cant read" :D

[albeitrecluse]

Fat Jesus - Used in The Hangover

You go girl - Used in Due Date

[00stupid1]

You go girl!

[JakeUpNorth]

Thumbs up if you remember the stubby beer bottles

[Tycones5544]

wow he was doing those jokes in 1999, because he still does them now

[oldkidsjonge]

Dont like it.

[DamoD95]

double chemo he went there

[FabrickProductions]

"Not you white Jesus. Move it on back"

[MrCjohnson157]

i LOVE zach but he really doesnt have a lot of material

[DonRMB]

WAIT, WAIT, WAIT, WAIT!... Zach was the originator of "YOU AIN'T GOT NO PANCAKE MIX"!? : O

[schapadap]

@DonRMB yes, he invented that shit

[pyropaul566]

oh ny gawd... the origin of "you aint got no pancake mix"

[Graindza]

Biscotti!!!

[lonelygnome1]

Wow, he has not updated his act at all.

[JaCkMiChEaLs0n]

@lonelygnome1 what are you talking about only a couple of them were old

[LinnerDee]

Red Stripe!

[JoshuaPweiss]

hahahaha i think everyone should watch this!!!! LMAO

[vdoman]

Scrotum Gravy? What a great fuckin' name for a band!

[DarkCabaret13]

Not sure if anyone pointed this out, but at 0:28, he calls himself fat jesus. He is called fat jesus in the hangover.

[schapadap]

@DarkCabaret13 yea a lot of the hangover jokes he made or that were about him were his own, or at least id heard them before in his standup

[erandimorales]

you ain't got no pancake mix! @ 5:34 umm does anyone remember that kid yelling this to the Christian preacher lady in that video that got over 3 million views? and no one knew where it was from!

[CRABCORE4EVA]

Red Stripe!

[FatedFaerie]

hooray for beer!

[markunit72]

whats a block buster...

[siskokidd]

@markunit72 Blockbuster - video store where you rented movies. The Netflix of the last century.

[markunit72]

@siskokidd i was joking... technically you could buy movies and rent games too

[siskokidd]

@markunit72 Don't forget action toys, posters, popcorn and candy.

[milesgti]

@siskokidd Ya no joke. Netflix should send candy with dvds.

[oldkidsjonge]

@siskokidd You could rent popcorn?:O

[LieExtinguisher]

@siskokidd Thx for the block buster info btw i didn't know it either

[MrCsr521]

@markunit72 A verry popular store in AMERICA!!!

[robm227]

@markunit72 How old are you? 13? Fuck man.

[ClayDuMaw]

Red Stripe!

[bluetoaster02]

i love the mom text joke

[contact1araya]

he needs to drink or smoke weed for real........his jokes suck sober......maybe if I get drunk they might be funnier.

[juicebox05]

LMFAO. " You know what i like to do when im making out with a woman, i like to whisper in her ear... would you touch my vagina"... and than shes like "WHAT" and im like "thats what your suppost to say.." :D

[BahamianTuner]

40 people didn't know what fat Jesus was going to do next.

[siskokidd]

What was really fun about watching Zach in those early days is that he often did shows where the other comics were brainy, urban, sophisticated types (nttawwt). Then up would come Zach doing his deliberate dumb guy act and it was such a bold, hilarious contrast.

[inaians]

That's what you're supposed to say... HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHA!

[goodknite]

Apparently he wore those jackets so that they don't edit his act. Cant cut out jokes if he's losing a jacket.

[sketch2k]

@goodknite THAT IS BRILLIANT. Thank you for an entirely new angle on life. Peace.

[adriannngp2012]

5:39 OMFG theres a viral video of a guy saying that, THAT MEANS HE WENT TO THAT STANDUP!!!!!!!

[jorjor31]

not you fat jesus

[deipan]

Between the ferns is the greatest thing he's ever done!

[sniff745]

that funny MF

[McAleeks]

Thanks 9gag.

[Elieja101]

you aint got no pancake mix...lol

[aescobar32]

Red Stripe!

[l3urton]

this is not from 1999 at all... hes using references that aren't even 5 years old.

[Weezerlover94]

"I have a new feature on my phone and it locks out each time my mom says "I wish you were my boyfriend.'"

I second that girl's "What?" at 0:49

[GreenBlaze]

RED STRIPE

[zergmacm]

He looks like Streeter!

[Chalmsloff]

Drinkin' a Red Stripe?!

HELL YES SIR! HELL YES.

[hugeackman]

first, he stole the "I'm very funny" line from another comedian.

second, he was funnier then.

[Maxim92jazeker]

holy shit he sucks

[goodalwaysworks]

@Maxim92jazeker i was afraid i was the only one who thought this. way funnier now.

[Maxim92jazeker]

@goodalwaysworks indeed, give him some funny lines in a movie so he can put on his silly face, you know. But clearly he shouldn't come up with jokes himself

[zsp33dyG]

Meh

[ajm21582]

Is he reading off that cheat sheet?

[Gregd8888]

"I have a new feature on my phone and it blocks out each time my mom says I wish you were my boyfriend"

"...what?"

I fucking love how he never elaborated on that lmao, he should have ended with that joke just to leave them confused as fuck.

[Beluthomas]

9gagers ATTAAAAAAAAAAAACKKKKKKKKKKKK

[grendelee]

"What?" lol

[James1803]

HE AIN"T GUNNA EMAIL YOU!

[yaj00001]

He looks so fit!

[UnderestimatedHERO]

fat jesus :)

[SpaghettiMarinarable]

He's worked hard since then. Hard work = really funny.

[EveryonesTalking]

Awesome find :)

[madamimadamimadam]

5:23 I really shouldn't have been drinking water.

[NeverTrust82]

Damn he actually used to be funnier

[launchmusicc]

he looks blind in this video, open your eyes mang

[siskokidd]

@launchmusicc In his defense, where he's standing, there are big stage lights less than 4 feet from his face. It was a constant issue at that venue - just how bright to turn up the lights. Too much and it burns the comics eyes, too little and the video looks like crap. Even when the lighting was set at a minimum in order to get good video, it was still very bright for the comics.

[launchmusicc]

@siskokidd oh i see, i was thinkin he did it to not look at the audience to be less nervous. This reminded me of gilbert godfree, he always was squinting at the lights but I think he has eye issues. 

[DockiXoX]

@siskokidd Plus, he was fucking stoned.

[Stian88]

they took FAT JESUS FROM HERE lol

[panzercommandier]

noooo fat jesus dont do ittt

[Zlibservacratican]

I think Galifianakis must have been inspired by Mitch Hedberg.

[StopMotionParadise]

4:55 weird girl laughing in the background.

[x2008ktj]

anyone else can't stop paying attention to all the hacking coughs?

[siskokidd]

@x2008ktj That's funny. What I hear are the loud clinks and clanks from the bartender and wait staff handling empty bottles.

[86MrWhite]

@x2008ktj seems like winter time/ flu season...no one wears that many jackets down here unless it is

[ZedBazinga]

hi reddit

[2011Sierraon20s]

Best awkward comedian ever!

[JONmanIStheBEST]

he's had the same act for 10 years? no way

[00PJaM00]

:)

[surrenderhope]

how old is he there

[gregarious24]

Hooray beer!

[CaptainCrack3r]

Red Stripe? Nasty.

[gavnastyyy]

People cheered when he mentioned the show "Blind Date?"

[siskokidd]

@gavnastyyy Possibilities: It's another L.A. inside joke to clap and cheer for crappy shows, or the person cheering was connected to the show in some way, or appeared on an episode.

[gla3dr]

Reddit sent me here. Awesome

[IFknHateUTube]

@gla3dr nobody gives a shit about who sent you here

[yurtyybomb]

is this funny?

[hunterstory7]

I dont understand the mom part.

[ddnn3]

I thought in 1999 Costco was still called price club

[whskrbiscuit]

You ain't got no pancake mix!

[mattlohkamp]

I love how little eye contact he's making the whole time.

[iconfirmim18]

I find him awkwardly attractive.

[baconfury44]

Zach Galifianakis...The most awkward comedian ever.

[BuffloBuffloBufflo]

smoking

?



[VoteForClaudio]

fat jesus that's where the joke came from for the hangover movie

[Dethkill14]

@VoteForClaudio The chuckie cheese restraining order thing came from his stand up too

[DangerousAsian]

Brace yourself... the redditors are coming

[Snodgers3rdclass]

@DangerousAsian AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

[TheGreatMiniboss]

@DangerousAsian We're already here.

[colwellalec]

@DangerousAsian We're heeerrrreee

[neozerocool7]

@DangerousAsian they're not alone. so are 9gaggers!!!

[KevinLBmx]

so this is where "you aint got no pancake mix" came from

[TheJaparican]

ive heard these same jokes on the big stage, still funny

[MrCosio]

So thats where the fat jesus joke comes from

[southport97]

They gave out rings at the Holocaust?

[GuyWithThreeEyes]

50th comment.

[MilquetoastThug]

Dude, he looks like Day 9 from starcraft

[Freezykow]

"You ain't got no pancake mix!" Dear God it was Zach Galifianakis all this time...

[ttk1opc]

Definitive proof that kid ripped off the pancake mix line.

[apetersonlv]

wow, these people sure will laugh at everything. Geez

[saivert]

@apetersonlv they are drunk. everything is funny then.

[linkinmylog]

This was 12 YEARS AGO!!!!

[robshenton]

He's drinking cough syrup.

[GetMyFeetGirl]

@robshenton try red stripe you fucking idiot.

[ZachTheRedBeardKing]

He's drinking red stripe. How young are all of you?

[IrJebus]

@KyleJacobs12: Mother fuckin' RED STRIPE

[KyleJacobs12]

what the fuck is he drinking

[EschatosApe]

@KyleJacobs12 Looks like Red Stripe to me.

[vytisplayer]

the hangover stole his fat jesus joke?

[xStealthClown]

@vytisplayer Stole?

[MrCurtybird]

@vytisplayer red stripe

[IFknHateUTube]

why did they laugh when mentioned the name of a road?

[siskokidd]

@IFknHateUTube Local L.A. thing (mispronunciation of street names), just the like the joke about the valley.

[Link5523]

You ain't got no pancake mix!

[temporary1121]

you aint got no pancake mix

[supernuke]

he looks exactly the same

[Watch0ut23]

Im pretty sure hes drinking a bottle of 'tussin

[ubiquitousambiguity]

@Watch0ut23 Pretty sure it's a Red Stripe

[NaughtyBurrito]

His beard is proportional to his comedy.

[stillstandad]

Why was he taking such short sips of that beverage?!

[J450]

"i got a new feature on my phone, it blocks when my mom says 'i wish you were my boyfriend'" "WAT?"

[kiao1208]

Not you, fat Jesus!

[ryancb06]

Its amazing what writers can do for you...

[QueenGoesYT]

awesome !!!

[thenameistaylor69]

genius

[gotrixx5806]

he looks exactly the same as now



[CitiesInTheSky]

Wait. Is this where you Ain't Got No Pancake Mix came from?

[brightlights456X]

Is this the guy from Kings of Queens?

[KyUHLz]

@brightlights456X No thats patton oswald.

[brightlights456X]

@KyUHLz

Thanks baby doll.

[cmsule]

nice, thanks for the upload.

[Zybergod]

He's drinking Red Stripe. One more reason why I love Zach :)