I think cheating is the result of both people in the relationship. One person manipulates the other by using guilt, the person full of guilt feels they're a bad person hence, a self fulfilling prophecy
@Ty98ink In my experience the person who cheats has to take responsibility for their own actions. If the other person is perceived as "pushing them to it" then they always have the option to leave the relationship/be honest.
It started off in my life that I was the one who always got cheated on,it became devastating,my self image became very distorted.I became involved in some very unhealthy relationships thinking if I tried harder,dressed better,lost weight etc that I wouldn't get cheated on again,it doesn't work.I lost love for myself,lost trust in society,suffered depression and even tried to commit suicide a few times.If your cheating/being cheated on,in the end no one is happy.counseling has really helped me.
@porsalainheart Thanks for sharing about your past. I'm glad that counseling helped. I've found that when I trust in myself and trust in my path in life, being let down by others is less painful. In other words, I want to keep an open heart, while never becoming dependent upon another's actions for my happiness...since that is giving away my own power.
My question is why do i feel like cheating on my girlfriend with a younger girl i fooled with about 4 years ago, i love my current girlfriend to death, but i cant stop thinking about this other person, and i dont think i can control these feelings im 23 pls help!!
@strongarmeric On a sociobiological level we're programmed to "spread our seed" and impregnate as many women as possible. That's how humans became so "plentiful" on the planet. As we shift from biological-identity to values-based individuals we stop lying...so cheating is no longer possible. If you want to break up with your girlfriend because you're not ready for monogamy, that's okay. Just don't lie to her if you respect her at all.
Wow, There are a lot of overlapping concepts mentioned that might need more depth and concentration: Especially to those who are very judgmental and believe they are not flawed. I commend you Chris for your honesty. Your authenticity will truly show to those who really will need this advice. Thanks.
@Ju1ietable Thank you for your warm feedback. When I look back on my past it's like I was another person. Now that I have empathy it's impossible to imagine being able to cheat.
I can't put my feeling on it, but my intuitive gut tells me that karma is less of an issue than we're lead to believe. As part of how we function in society, we keep certain bits of information from each other on a daily basis. An example is when gay guys use the word her to cover up the fact the partner is male. it's the guilt factor that causes the most damage. And then there's the whole issue of co-creating and the intent both partners hold when entering into a relationship.
Greetings Chris! Love your perspectives on topics. I agree that when people lie (cheat), they are mostly lying to themselves and hurt themselves more than they hurt their partners. I don't believe in karma but do believe that one choice leads to another choice and all choices have results or consequences. Personal responsibility and honesty with oneself are key.
I think cheating is the result of both people in the relationship. One person manipulates the other by using guilt, the person full of guilt feels they're a bad person hence, a self fulfilling prophecy
T.Y ***SLAP*** Now yous a beanie baby
Ty98ink 10 months ago
@Ty98ink In my experience the person who cheats has to take responsibility for their own actions. If the other person is perceived as "pushing them to it" then they always have the option to leave the relationship/be honest.
UnificationDotCom 10 months ago
It started off in my life that I was the one who always got cheated on,it became devastating,my self image became very distorted.I became involved in some very unhealthy relationships thinking if I tried harder,dressed better,lost weight etc that I wouldn't get cheated on again,it doesn't work.I lost love for myself,lost trust in society,suffered depression and even tried to commit suicide a few times.If your cheating/being cheated on,in the end no one is happy.counseling has really helped me.
porsalainheart 1 year ago
@porsalainheart Thanks for sharing about your past. I'm glad that counseling helped. I've found that when I trust in myself and trust in my path in life, being let down by others is less painful. In other words, I want to keep an open heart, while never becoming dependent upon another's actions for my happiness...since that is giving away my own power.
UnificationDotCom 11 months ago
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siumullandhs 1 year ago
My question is why do i feel like cheating on my girlfriend with a younger girl i fooled with about 4 years ago, i love my current girlfriend to death, but i cant stop thinking about this other person, and i dont think i can control these feelings im 23 pls help!!
strongarmeric 1 year ago
@strongarmeric On a sociobiological level we're programmed to "spread our seed" and impregnate as many women as possible. That's how humans became so "plentiful" on the planet. As we shift from biological-identity to values-based individuals we stop lying...so cheating is no longer possible. If you want to break up with your girlfriend because you're not ready for monogamy, that's okay. Just don't lie to her if you respect her at all.
Peace,
Chris
UnificationDotCom 1 year ago
@UnificationDotCom Thanks ill take that in mind!!
strongarmeric 1 year ago
@strongarmeric No problem. Feel free to write me directly if you want to process this more.
UnificationDotCom 1 year ago
Like I ALWAYS SAID- MY EX HATED GOD AND BELIEVED ALIENS CREATED US- HMMM NO GOD =NO CONSCIENCE. HOW CONVENIENT.
evictingfaith 1 year ago
Wow, There are a lot of overlapping concepts mentioned that might need more depth and concentration: Especially to those who are very judgmental and believe they are not flawed. I commend you Chris for your honesty. Your authenticity will truly show to those who really will need this advice. Thanks.
Ju1ietable 1 year ago
@Ju1ietable Thank you for your warm feedback. When I look back on my past it's like I was another person. Now that I have empathy it's impossible to imagine being able to cheat.
UnificationDotCom 1 year ago
If you love your partner you would not cheat. Makes me laugh when someone says I love my partner but I went out on her. What a crock of s h i t.
pat4597 1 year ago
@pat4597 Many people think they understand love but it's really just lust or obligation. Love that's connect on a heart level does not lie.
UnificationDotCom 1 year ago
Chris ~ Thank you for sharing. Good perspective.
amanda21x0 1 year ago
@amanda21x0 Thank you for your kind feedback.
UnificationDotCom 1 year ago
I can't put my feeling on it, but my intuitive gut tells me that karma is less of an issue than we're lead to believe. As part of how we function in society, we keep certain bits of information from each other on a daily basis. An example is when gay guys use the word her to cover up the fact the partner is male. it's the guilt factor that causes the most damage. And then there's the whole issue of co-creating and the intent both partners hold when entering into a relationship.
Telekon5 2 years ago
Greetings Chris! Love your perspectives on topics. I agree that when people lie (cheat), they are mostly lying to themselves and hurt themselves more than they hurt their partners. I don't believe in karma but do believe that one choice leads to another choice and all choices have results or consequences. Personal responsibility and honesty with oneself are key.
MelodyProsser 2 years ago