Russell Howard's Good News - Daily Mail Cancer Song

[frooglepop13579]

I will memorise this if it kills me...

[9dj34]

Im fine with them not wearing bras so they dont get cancer :-)

[89sweetsweet]

I'd like to thank the top two comments from @frubetube94 and @110CheekyChick for giving us the lyrics in order. Cheers :P

[Saparonia]

The one thing that is of concern to me is the bisphenol A that is in plastics including synthetic fibers used for clothes and also in printer ink and most food wrappings. It was proven to cause cancer and to mimic estrogen in the body. Just for a day take notice of how much you come into contact with it, it's absorbed by the skin as well as in food and drink.

[caketakeshh]

Not to all the people out there

- You do not get cancer from everything

[silvster123]

Omg he's soo funny!!! I know all the words off by heart !!! B

[milkandcookies879]

Russell Howard AND a Billy Joel song?

My life is just complete -3

[DisneyGirl4Ever98]

And ironically I'm 13 lol

[DisneyGirl4Ever98]

@jaci999 I feel like such a loser :(

[DisneyGirl4Ever98]

@Simsplayer5 he's 18 years older than me -_-

[jaci999]

@DisneyGirl4Ever98 He's 13 years younger than me but we can all dream lol

[frubetube94]

Age, air, alcohol, aspirin, calcium, ham, honey, eggs, dogs, dieting and soup. Being a woman, Being a man, bubble bath, food from cans, being black, wearing bras, left-handedness, speedy cars, oestrogen, climate change, baby food, the menopause, beef, beer, pizza, pork, cereal and worcester sauce, childlessness, children, vitamins, bacon, chocolate, retirement, deodorant and facebook!

[110CheekyChick]

THE MAIL SAYS THAT THESE CAUSE CANCER, BUT ITS ONY RUMORS THAT THEY GIVE U TUMOURS, THEYVE GOT SOME BIG BALLS TO PRINT IT CAUSE ITS 60 PAGES OF SCARY BULLSHITTTTT!

[Saparonia]

@110CheekyChick Unless you think of how many of these involve synthetic materials like the plastic lining in cans and the bottles that bubble bath come in, see my other post

[110CheekyChick]

Laughed*



[110CheekyChick]

Things I Laughed So Hard at : Soup Being Black Wearing Bras Worcester sause,

Bacon, retirement, deodorant and the one that made the luaghthe hardest has to be facebook XD

[frubetube94]

Calcium, Soup, Being Black, Cereal. All these made me lol so hard

[hellomyfriend85]

My science teacher told me that eating toast increases your chance of cancer - so tempted to send him this.

[frubetube94]

@hellomyfriend85 I think you should, See his reaction to it :L

[ThatKidKnows]

@hellomyfriend85 well, apparently any burnt or overcooked meat will too... XD So, that means we need to put more on the list....

[DigidestinedJason396]

It's times like this that you appreciate Lady Gaga for being a hermaphrodite xD

[Simsplayer5]

If Russell wasn't 17 years older than me, I'd marry him. :3

I love Russell, he's hilarious!

[darkwarrior80]

ive memorized this

[VIDEOSTUDIOS]

ladies and genteman, we're all fucked!

[LibbyLiveMusic]

oh no. guess i'll be living off soup then...no wait, THAT WAS THERE TOO! =(

[FleecyWelshGez]

Indeed, I love how they all laugh at the way soup just pops out randomly and the way he says it tops it all off! Great work Russell, he should have his own religion. Russellism? Or GoodNewsarian?

[z3r0t0l3r4ns]

I've always had a much simpler view, LIFE causes cancer.

[ellietheweid1]

couldn't agree more :D

[jazzzyy13]

@xoXHugzAb1eXox I'm just making a point. A valid point... don't want to learn, don't read... you can choose!

[missemmett67]

i should have died about 30 times then !!!!

[TheAnimemanize]

at this rate...the whole world is going to die

[jazzzyy13]

@TheAnimemanize Never!

[FloraCathyVideos]

I have actually remembered all the words to the song :)

[epicsnipafailure]

this is EPIC

[reverthefablehero]

@Mathew9714 you posted twice, i like that!

[Zoltonthehedgehog100]

i'm quitting facebook then,lol 

[jazzzyy13]

Actually, air can cause cancer, as it contains radon gas, which is radioactive... sorry Russ. That apart, brilliant :D

[MegaRobot2011]

@jazzzyy13  stop trying to sound smart.

[jazzzyy13]

@MegaRobot2011 What's wrong with sounding smart? I'm just pointing it out, since it's true.

Now I get slammed for pointing out something that's true... lovely.

[bringbackjericho]

@jazzzyy13 It's not true, since the amount of radon in air is negligible. You'd have to be alive for 17 billion years to see the effects.

[jazzzyy13]

@bringbackjericho It is true, as people who live in Cornwall (which has the highest amount of radon gas in the atmosphere in Britain) are statistically and scientifically proven to be more likely to develop cancer due to the radon gas, which gives out radiation that can damage human cells and lead them to mutate into cancer cells. I have an A in Additional Science GCSE and had to study radon gas for the exam.

[musiaholic]

i must have cancer in millions of ways if this is what they're saying !! ;DD 

[abbierydin]

EPIC!

[andrewlawrence2209]

0:20 I'm left-handed :(

[SIMONEROX009]

I breathe in air... I take aspirin... I drink milk...eat ham, honey and eggs... have 2 dogs... been on a diet... eat (or is it drink) soup... I'm a woman... have bubble baths.... eat canned food... i'm half black... wear a bra... im left handed... live with climate change... eat beef and pizza.... tried beer... eat pork and cereal... have no children... have kids in my family... eat bacon and chocolate... use deodorant and have facebook.... i should just kill myself really.... Yes i am sad :D HA

[Oneill3010]

has anybody seen some of the recent ones they claim that energy saving lightbulbs and swimming can cause cancer what total bollocks

[BlackBerryCurvez]

THE MOST HILARIOUS THING I'VE HEARD IN MY LIFE!!! Literally pissing myself!!

"60 pages of scary bullshit!" XD XD XD XD

[jonny70476]

best song ever

[gotbannedbefore]

techincally they are correct about age

[bobbyjohny1]

Well thats lady gaga fuked up

[TheJoshoraptor]

@bobbyjohny1

Not exactly, 'being woman, being man' Gaga is niether !

[Azophia]

we are all fucked.. oke now we can back to living

[Baden98]

Wow even wearing bras... not that I ever wear bras of course, nope never worn any :s

[Stupidmetroid417]

i'm done for....

[brittyinwonderland]

"childlessness, children" lmao! we can't win!

[superfastjam]

u missed out that cancer can give u cancer

[AmyyLouuLaaaXx]

does anyone know how to find the video where that woman accidentally draws a dick? when she has 'no control over the pen' ?<3 x

[Syrath101]

Brilliant XD "But its only rumours that give you tumours".

[TheBieberbabe95]

were all gonna die

[MegaSpoon7]

= < ]

[frankielegendboyle]

easier to tell us what doesnt give cancer.

[Brady15j]

2 people have cancer

[tornadoGT01]

so if your a non black, right handed genderless person who doesn't need to digest anything, with no pets, doesn't mind smelling like shit who lived on mars with no internet you're fine.

[leelee8051]

I luv this guy, he is so funny

[donkeyjade]

haha i love this :D this man is a legend :P x

[mscartman22]

well we've all got cancer

[Bluegear93]

I'm Fucked

[jaci999]

@Bluegear93 hahaha!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :)

[Zoltonthehedgehog100]

@Bluegear93 lol if you are we all are

[legoperson56784321]

@Bluegear93 were all fucked

[chris1123321]

so baseicly you its telling you ,you will get cancer. wimen men childless children .proven point

[0946218123]

so as long as u dont age dont breathe dont drink dont use aspirin or eat or drink anything with calcium.

dont eat ham honey eggs dont have a dog dont diet and dont eat soup

your not a woman not a man dont have bubble baths dont eat food from cans your not black dont wear bras not left handed and dont have a speedy car

dont have oestrogen dont live on a planet with climate change dont eat baby food dont have the menopause dont eat meat or cereal and Worcestershire sauce and dont have facebook OK

[0946218123]

facebook gives u cancer im fucked

[rocketmik65]

age air alcholol aspirin and clacium, ham honey eggs dogs dieting and soup! being woman being man bubble bath and food from cans, being black wearing bras left handedness speedy cars, oestrogen climate change baby food the meopause,beef beer pizza pork

[rocketmik65]

cereal worcester sauce, childlessness children vitamins and bacon, chocolate retirement deodorant and facebook! the mail says that these cause cancer! but its only rumours that they give you tumours! the've got some big balls to print it, cos its 60 pages of scary bull$&^%!!!!!

[FiBeth109]

"theyve got some big balls to print it! coz its sixty pages of scary bullshiiiiiiiiiit!" :L xx

ROCK ON RUSSELL HOWARD!!

[TheWeeklyNewsVids]

Personally, i think reading the Mail gives you cancer.

[Brookwest07]

THEY GOT SOME BIG BALLS TO PRINT IT CAUSE ITS 60 PAGES OF

SCARY BULLSHIT!! just too funny :D

[nikitheNCISchick]

what is the original song? it sounds familiar

[nikitheNCISchick]

what is the original song? it sounds familiar

[sweetcfromsweetd]

@nikitheNCISchick can't remember who sang it but it's called 'we didn't start the fire'. hope that helps! XD

[nikitheNCISchick]

@sweetcfromsweetd  thanks so much XD

[eddiebruv]

@sweetcfromsweetd I think it was Billy Joel sang the original. This version's better!

[sweetcfromsweetd]

@eddiebruv absolutely! the original was on the radio the other day, and i couldn't NOT sing this version over the top of it. (seen it so many times now that i know all the words cause i'm THAT cool!) got some weird looks from the guys i work with lol

[TheGhostlyTrio]

lol soup xD I sung this song once lol

[w33nick]

theres cancer in all of us but there just has to b something to trigger it

[sunderland46]

i love this song because most or probably all are lies coz if air gives u cancer then we would all be dead

[SUFCKilgour14]

Just the 1 mail reader then.

[lookeastwards]

Haha... It's funny because we're all going to die by Friday....

[5randomness5]

Asking For a parody here :)

[ParallelEternity]

Well we're all screwed :P

[XLadyOfSorrowsXx]

ahahaha

laughing give you cancer ya know...LMAOOO

[gingaguy5656]

so black people are born with cancer?

[catknight667]

i probably have about a million different cancers...fuck it.

[robstadanielzz]

SOUP

[Deadbeatloser22]

Oh come on...

Everyone knows it's the immigrants that cause cancer.

[MixedBag27]

I almost died (of laughing not cancer) when I saw this.

[rexana]

@MixedBag27 You know laughing gives you cancer, right? x3

[Katie09Girl]

Lol amazing song XD Ok so if i wear a bra i get cancer Lmao Ok girls we've all going to die

[VitaOz200]

being black....

ok AFRICA'S screwed

[timelord499]

RETIERMENT THATS BULLSHIT AND CHOCOLATE WELL IF SO THEN FUCK IT ILL HAVE CANCER IM NOT GIVIN UP CHOCOLATE

[catknight667]

@timelord499 WELL SAID, MY GOOD FRIEND!!

[timelord499]

@catknight667 =D

[dcshoecousa101]

i know all the words to this.

how sad. :L

love russell howard!

[Littletattle]

@dcshoecousa101 What's sad is after not listening to it a for a few months, you still know the words.

[dcshoecousa101]

@Littletattle i do still know all the words cause i've listened to it countless times.

[Amanda0Green0Matthew]

@dcshoecousa101 i raped the replay button for a half anm hour and learned it :D!!!

[futurepredator111]

black middle aged women are screwed

[wheyman1]

Absolutely brilliant, funny how being true makes it funnier!

[fblueproductions]

its funny coz its true

[Bellaalicecullen4eva]

I love russell howard!! xx and this song is so cool!

[998gabbi]

I hav 19 of those things Omg

[vampireravefan]

this song is so addictive!

[Podiexoxo]

uhh ohh im on facebook now D:

[Xbox360videos141]

Being Black :L

[001Stacey]

LOL <3 it. And Russell is amzaing :) <3

[sunderland46]

it is awsome and i agree they are rumors that they will give you tumors  because some of them things is not our fault

[ManaTheRsPwner]

Goof ol' Russell Howard

[mckenzie74123]

when is the new series starting ?

[jaci999]

@mckenzie74123 there's a new series in the autumn

[alfiexz]

i am gonig to die i go on face book

[elliotsvideos]

This guy is so funny saw it on telly and apsaloutley funny couldn't stop laughing

[lightupthesky01]

i love this guy too much :)

hahaaa i love everything he does and this is just awesome :L one of the best versions of this song, and believe me, iv heard ALOT :) <3

[ruby1caitlin2]

omg i fucking luv u russel! ur a fucking genius

[TheAngus777]

60 pages of scary bullshiiiittt!

[stockage2121]

haha

[jakebeel123]

its we didnt light the fire

[EL1T3N1NJ4]

wearing bras causes cancer huh cool ok girls dont wear bras simple problem solved oh yeah and they missed out that wearing shirts cause cancer too ( lie ) so dont wear shirts or anything else either :)

[jaci999]

@EL1T3N1NJ4 hahaha, well i'm not taking my bra off

[EL1T3N1NJ4]

@jaci999 this happened again and how the hell did i get 3 thumbs?..........oh yeah

[EL1T3N1NJ4]

@jaci999 did my old post thing post coz i got it wrong what i ment to say was this happened ages ago or sumthing

[tufnell7]

@jaci999 ont knock it till u try it

[scousereddy2468]

@jaci999 your a chik and you like russell howards good news?

[jaci999]

@scousereddy2468 Hell yeah :)

[scousereddy2468]

@jaci999 that something you dont see every day!

[xxSarahCoakleyxx]

@jaci999 Yeah, what girl doesnt, im in love with Russel Howards Good News lmfao xx

[luvmyMCR4evaxx]

@scousereddy2468 what is that like illegal or something? Why wouldn't girls like Russell Howard?

[scousereddy2468]

@luvmyMCR4evaxx it's just unlikely thats all!

[3GreenMojo]

@scousereddy2468 There's nothing weird about a girl liking Russell Howard's Good News, is there? I watch it and I'm a girl too. Mainly because Russell is fit <3

And he's also funny, of course! ;D

[scousereddy2468]

@3GreenMojo ok,ok... the HO has beat the BRO i guess russel howard is funny for everyone!

[3GreenMojo]

@scousereddy2468 Woah! What do you mean by "The Ho has beat the Bro"?

[scousereddy2468]

@3GreenMojo oh fuck you! i tried to get this stupid sexist chat to stop easily but you just keep coming back for more!!! russel howard is funny for everyone you stupid, lezbian, freak! fuck you!

[scousereddy2468]

@3GreenMojo happy new year crazy bi-atch!

[3GreenMojo]

@scousereddy2468 I'm trying to be as nice as I can! I was just wondering what you meant by the term "The Ho has beat the Bro". NOT in a sexist way... I can't be arsed to be sexist, mate ;)

And may I say, your attitude is far from lovely... And how dare you call me a lesbian freak?! I am not a lesbian! But I am a bit of a freak LOL. Look, I'm a nice person, and I don't like getting in arguements with random people on the internet. So shall we call truce? It'd make things nicer for the both of us

[scousereddy2468]

@3GreenMojo truce! i'm gutted russell howards good news has finished!

[3GreenMojo]

@scousereddy2468 As am I mate. But at least you get to see the repeats on Dave next week! :D

[scousereddy2468]

@3GreenMojo same here!

[Brookwest07]

@scousereddy2468 Erm not just guys like Russel Howard you know he is a legend! he is just to funny on good news! :D

[scousereddy2468]

@Brookwest07 iv already had an argument over the whole sexist comment i wrote! so can you just leave me alone!

[Brookwest07]

@scousereddy2468 Ok calm down I was olny saying that girls can like it to and that he is a legend gosh keep your hair on...

[scousereddy2468]

@Brookwest07 iv been through this befor so lets just end this convosation now!

[Brookwest07]

@scousereddy2468 OK!! Jeesh... : /

[jonny70476]

@EL1T3N1NJ4 pervert yeh u perv

[CopyrightPropaganda]

@EL1T3N1NJ4

Why do girls feel obligated to wear a bra, anyways?

It has been scientifically proven that they only affect breast shape while being worn (useless much?), and that they cause your breasts to sag and deform at an accelerated rate.

[Rikku2250]

@CopyrightPropaganda

It hides your nipples and you feel more confortable as they are...held in and in place.

[kingofmonra]

@EL1T3N1NJ4 You forgot to add that, this is only for fit girls.

[pburgess1]

the mail says that thease cause cancer! but its only rumours that they give you tumours! they got big balls to print it cos its sixty pages of scary bullshit!!!!!!!

[xbigbobbyrocks4lyfx]

When is the new series starting? I really wanna know! Missing the show and love the song!

[jaci999]

@xbigbobbyrocks4lyfx New series in the autumn

[xbigbobbyrocks4lyfx]

@jaci999 Thankk Youu! x

[MJsNotSoClever]

6O PAGES OF SCARY BULLSHIT :L hahahaahahah

[TheeJolene]

"Cos It's 60 pages of scary BULLSHIT"

[Krishna442]

can someone clarify whether russel howard and the good news team made this themselves. or whether it was one of the clips he finds on the net and shares with everyone.

[davewentskiing]

@Krishna442 Definitely made themselves.

[Emmaprettypink]

@Krishna442 Russell Howard and the good news team made it:)

[95snipz]

HALIRIOUS

[MissProperPosh]

Gotta love this <3

[CFKandSD]

I love that "facebook" causes cancer

[JackKoChit01]

haha XD I haven't heard "We didn''t start the fire" in ages. :P

[ForEvansSake]

Any one else notice that they use the same things twice? pork and bacon, alcohol and beer, age and retirement (kinda), being a woman and oestrogen (kinda again)

So its not as bad as peolple think!

[carcrazygti]

do you have the football song from another one of the episodes??

[GTFrank]

Dude, how could you rip vids from BBC iPlayer? Gimme a clue please~

[kmNinjapants0o]

anyone know where i can download this? :')