Added: 2 years ago
From: infidelmovie
Views: 112,734
Sort by time | Sort by thread (beta)

Link to this comment:

Share to:

All Comments (247)

Sign In or Sign Up now to post a comment!
  • Sound believable to me.

  • @RIT2009 and this - Muslim boy converts to Judaism watch?v=vMPE3qRliKw

  • @intifada3now it's comedy you dumb ass. Do you just lurk Youtube to spread your message?

  • @RIT2009

    looks like it ^^

  • well to be honest I am really not a racist but Chinese ppl do offend me :D ..kidding !

  • im pretty sure this story is backwards, it was the israelis that said the speech and the palestinians interrupted

    im so sure because i heard it on LA persian radio

  • @jonyadegari That's what I was thinking as well. Don't know what Omid was thinking.

  • Lol

  • Canaan for the Canaanites.

  • the joke is actually the other way around. An Israeli delegation says when Moses went swimming a palestinian took his clothes. The arabs say- "LIES!! there were no palestinians existing at the time of moses!

  • Not biased or anything just stating fact

  • These modern day Zionist aren't even Semites as they claim. Their ancestry is from khazaria. And by nature they are mischievous murderers and lying theiving creatures of the devil.

  • Ill explain.. the Israelis claim that they were Jews in those days hence all the fighting and Jewish land grab....

  • im lost..?

  • i don't get it? can someone please explain?

  • @pravkdey Israelis themselves say that at the time of moses there were no jews in palestine. meaning the isrealis dont have any more rights to palestine than the palestinians.

  • Gaza strip.

    There is no defence for that. None whatsoever.

  • @TBAWazzock

    what do you mean?

  • Whoever wrote it, it's a pretty good joke.

  • he actualy stole and changed that joke

    moses was jewish

    the real joke was with a palestinien stole his clothes

    and when the palestiniens will say that there were no palestiniens there at that time, the israeli deligate will start his speech

  • @avr1 liar 

  • @avr1 oh just shut up

  • @meenaxx

    the jewish people came to ISRAEL about 4700 years ago

    the beduiins that now go by the name of "palestiniens" came to work for jews about a 100 years ago

    pick up a F*cking history book you wanker.

    you LOGIC is INFIRIOR

    your KUNG FU is WEAK

    suck on my

    JEWISH D*CK

  • @avr1 again, just shut up

  • @meenaxx

    you cant hadle logic.

    thiving muslim and there unfunny stolen jokes

  • @avr1 Two things:

    1. Omid Djalili is not a Muslim. He's a Baha'i, and so is his family. You should do a little research before you throw your bigotry at someone.

    2. You should learn how to spell 'thieving". Again, if you want to accuse someone of something, you should do it correctly.

  • @nimamo19

    the baha'i religion,was a religion that was seperated from islam..but they are peaceful.

    i did not knew he was a baha'i,but that, by the way, does not say that he cant be biased about the jewish state, because he still is arabic with a missled and often false political idies.

    the fact that he is famus only makes it worse, because he spreads he's ignorence,to the "people",the dumb people that swallow every thing every semi famus and self proclaimed holy man tells them

  • @nimamo19

    by the way, i live near the baha'i's most sacred temple, in haifa, a truly beautyfull place.

    extrodinary sight.

    if muslims would have ruled the place, it would have burned to the ground.

    sorry for miss spelling thieving. english is NOT my native languege.

  • @nimamo19 bahai are homophobic hardly anything to b proud of the lasser of to evils is still evil an monotheism is pritty damn evil as a hold hes funny but fuck hes fath with a rusty spear

  • @avr1 don't you get it, shut up, it is only a joke

    you are just a fanatic bigot like all the others, being muslim, christian, ...

    you all see yourselves superior to the rest of the world and give yourselves the right to judge and criticise everybody else but never can take a look at your ugly face in the mirror and see the truth.

    so just shut up and for once try to enjoy a joke and not judge

  • @meenaxx

    and what truth is that? that i am a greedy long nosed jew who stole a country and rules over the world's economy? what truth?

    the only thing i see my self supirior to is ignorent people. violent people,and left and racists.

  • @avr1 truth if ur jewish dont use that word ur god yhwy is made up so u dont know the meaning of truth u know how hes made up coz hes sexist racist an homophobic yet he made all the fags women an none jews see thats how u know its all realy nature the real god love diversity jews are unnatural an hate god ur lucky hell isnt real

  • @kingpharaohtsar

    well pharaoh

    i dont know what false god do you belive in, but i do ask you one thing.

    does he forbids grammer?

  • @avr1 same god as einstein actually he was a naturalist u can look that up u sud try it xjews are far more successful than jews but if u want cary on runing from the truth an let sum1 esle get the greatness coz i just not good enuff to save with that troll mind u truly are daor na fear <slave of man

  • @avr1 so you know the truth !!! :D

  • @avr1 and for God's sake get off this page?!! let's people enjoy a joke. it is not a history lesson, it is only a joke.

  • Palestinians at the UN ? HAHA (too soon ?)

  • How can this joke be ? Moses was Jewish .... and in Israel .... the joke is a joke about Palestinians and has been twisted round and makes no sense ! (and UN, and 'Palestinians'?)

  • *yawn* that's an old Jewish joke, and it goes the other way round.

  • LOL

  • Stop with the philosophical debates and enjoy the comedy morons!

    P.S. The Adam and eve stuff, complete bullshit. Give me some hard fucking evidence that they existed. At least we can prove evolution and all this shit that god is trying to fool us is u just waffling and being a moron cause u have no proof AT ALL and science does!

  • @Viridismonasteriense um Adam didn't disobey eve did.

  • @thebrickster1423 "um Adam didn't disobey eve did."

    Then why was he punished?

  • @viridismonasteriense all of mankind was punished for eve's disobedience.

  • @thebrickster1423 I'll ask again, so why was adam punished?

    Do you think it's fair to punish or condemn someone for the crimes of another? To punish children for the crimes of their parents?

    If adam was innocent and god is supposed to be just, why was adam punished? Why was anyone punished for eating a piece of fruit?

    The entire moral of the story seems to be: ignorance is good, disobeying god is bad, no matter what he asks you to do. What a load of bull.

  • @viridismonasteriense lol just so you know im not a cristian i just know what they believe and its fully utter bullshit i agree.and it wasnt just a piece of fruit btw, it was fruit from the tree of knowledge or whatever bullshit they came up with.

  • @thebrickster1423 yeah, it's not even about the fruit, it's about the act of disobedience that was somehow so bad that yahwe thought it just to punish every single one of their children and their children's children etc. etc.

    and the real reason why yahwe kicked them out of the garden of eden was he was afraid they'd also eat from the tree of life and become gods like him. The entire story is insane myth, nonsense, talking snakes, and it's insane for anyone to take it literal.

  • @viridismonasteriense zzzzzzZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZzzzzzZZZZ­ZZZZZZZZZZZZ

  • @jradetzky I can't believe you bored yourself to sleep.

  • islam is the oldest religion, islam means submission to god. adam was a prophet and was being a muslim or submitting to god, period.

  • @Aloosh12 islam isn't the oldest religion and adam never existed. And in-story he didn't submit to god, he disobeyed, remember? Ouch...

  • @viridismonasteriense He did you fuckface, he submitted to God after admitting his error. Adam did exist you retard, he was the first man and Eve was the first woman.

  • @princepersia1 Oh, so he submitted to god after he didn't submit to god. Yeah, that makes sense.

    "Adam did exist you retard, he was the first man and Eve was the first woman.`

    HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

    I can´t wait to see you prove the existence of this mudman and ribwoman! And especially the talking snake! Think of all the incest they must´ve had to populate the planet! This story is so fucking insane it´s hilarious! And it´ll be more hilarious to see you defend it as literal! hahaha

  • @Aloosh12

    the jewish belive exist for 5000 years now

    christianity for about 2000 yeas

    so does budehizem

    islam only 1300 years

    where did you learn how to count?

    are you stupid?

  • if you wont 72 virgins dont forget You will have 72 mothers -in - law

  • @intifada3now i really don't understand your sentence :p please rephrase haha

  • @intifada3now At least say where you got that joke from...

  • @0122460166

    why does? does it have copyright?

  • @MrOctaneBeats Actually Aisha was 21 when she married Muhammad(saw)

  • Moses was Jewish....minor details of course I mean change the facts twist the story add some drama...its an arab thing don't worry about it minor details minor details....

  • genius!

  • HAHA!

  • @burnyourcrutch you are disturbing me during worship. Go away.

  • This isn't true, is it? If a palestinian managed to get through calls for "out of order" at the "thieving Jew" comment, that would actually be a very effective way to set up a speech.

  • Hinduism is consider to be the oldest LIVING religion, as of course there has been religion even before that, such as believing in spirits (which some still believe in). That everything has a spirit, every tree, thunder, animal, the sun, the stars etc etc. This then later branched out to countless other beliefs, but still there is evidence of it left: Ra the sun God, Christ the lamb, Ganesha (elephant head), Thor God of thunder and so on and so forth.

  • actually it was the other way around, the israeli said moses went to swim (2000 years ago) moses was dead 100 years ago

  • Whats the difference between jesus and his picture?his picture only needs one nail.

    Whats the difference between a boyscout and a jew?boyscouts come home from camp.

  • brilliant joke

  • thanks andrea haha!! nice movie..just watched this in webmovietube

  • Comment removed

  • I love this video , oh and I have something to ask you can I send you a message i want to c this movie in webmovietube

  • Allowing islam into your house is a bit like burying your dead grandmother under the floor.

    Eventually she will begin to smell and maggots will crawl out of the corpse.

    It will become so bad that even rats won't touch it.

    Your sleep will be disturbed by nightmares, demons and images of death, and your neighbours will stop talking to you.

    Then you will have to burn the house down and move, because thats the only way to dispose of the evil.

    Beware of dead grandmothers under the floor and islam.

  • Comment removed

  • @mikked82:

    Well I do agree that my little joke is not as funny as islam, but at least it won't kill anyone by throwing a bomb, will it?

    And I also feel that my little joke is a lot more successful than your poisoned death cult religion has been at telling the truth.

    But since you follow the idiot bastard mohammed, I'm not surprised.

    islam is just one great big F-ALLAH-CY!

  • Comment removed

  • @mikked82 :

    If you really are an athiest and a hater of religion, why then do you respond so cynically to my anti islam comments?

    I though only muslims had such double standards.

  • Comment removed

  • @mikked82:

    Where exactly did I say ALL muslims were terrorists?

    And why do you mention Jews?

    I am vehemently opposed to the political thrust of islam and its inherently violent nature.

    If you take a moment to read the koran, you will see why millions would agree with me.

    And its not about winning - its about underlining the fundamental totalitarian nature of islam, which is quite opposite to what most muslims will admit to.

    Islam is in fact a dangerous F-ALLAH-CY!

  • Comment removed

  • @mikked82:

    Yes I agree. Omjid is hilarious and very talented, but you are not my mother, so please don't tell me what I can or cannot converse about on this page.

    Peace...

  • @urheadonastick at least it's better than what you previously posted. thumbs up..

  • jewish are Funny!!

    Jew xD get it Jew mountain dew xDDDDD

    ... '_' nvm...but there funny anyway :l

  • you know what's arrogant; the way people believe that what they believe is with no exception, the real deal. in christianity alone, there are more than 30,000 faith structures. so out of all the religions and their denominations in the world (millions upon millions), one person can still claim with certainty that his way is the ONLY way. get the fuck out of here. i mean seriously, drop that superiority complex because it has and always will only serve to further screw up this world.

  • Yeap actually the joke is the other way around, he cheated fat bastard !!! LOL

  • Didn't he get the joke the wrong way round?!

  • wait I dont ge it? why would a "thieving jew" steal Moses's clothes?

    Moses is/was a jew, so WTF?

  • Judaism is funny. Islam is the truth. Thats it.

  • @lalamusa1

    we dont know the truth. Islam is bullshit. thats it (well... jews are indeed funny^^)

  • He either blew the joke badly or he changed a it to fit a piss poor sense of history.

    MOSES (a Jew) after wandering in the desert for 40 years takes off all of his clothes to bath in a stream. He gets out to find someone has stolen all of his clothes. At that point the Israeli PM turns & points saying it was YOU PALESTINIANS who stole Moses' clothes. The shocked Palestinian vehemently denies this saying we weren't even there yet. The Israeli says now that we have made that clear, lets begin.

  • Omgg, i dont understaand thiiis :(

    

  • @looney4lyf well, the punch line of the joke at the end is that the Israelis representative in UN himself said there was no Jew in Palestine back in the days, which verify what the Palestinian representative will going to say in his speech.

    (Hope that explain it)

  • @victorwongvw Thaaank Youuu :D:D

  • Humor is the key to world peace. Stop being so fucking serious all the time, all these religious books trys to teach us to be good against eachother, so stop the fighting !lol

  • @IIJubJubIl really? like Leviticus in the bible, telling us to stone women or kill your neighbor is he is wearing two kinds of cloths. How about the Koran who preaches war against non believers.

  • Islam means peace as in 'salam' in Arabic. The Jews say shalom for peace. So 'peace' 'shalom' 'islam' has been around before Muhammad .

  • Haha, that's speaker is a genius!!!

  • the oldest religion is worshipping the one god when god send adam and eve to earth to worship the one god no matter what is the name of the message or the religion the conclusion of all religion are the same good is good and bad is bad ;)

  • Lol that's a gud1

  • Hinduism is actually the oldest religion

  • @vixpatel1991 yeh and 1 of the funniest believe in elephants hahahahaha

  • jest chill - thats the point

  • The Oldest Religion in the World is Vagina Worship. Men for millions of years have been in awe and fallen in worship of this great Idol.We have tried take it home, to steal it, kiss it, touch it, fight kill and maim each other over it, seriously wound and injure themselves in order to gain its attention, do the moonewalk in steel toed boots for it.

    The homosexuals would be blaspheming Atheists against this Magnificent Religion.

  • @SirOscarWhiskey exept for female homosexuals.

  • @SirOscarWhiskey Douchebag.

  • @SirOscarWhiskey but looks bullet exit wound, and often smells worse, and bleeds more!

  • @SirOscarWhiskey Men haven't been on Earth for millions of years. Carbon dating is so unaccurate it's not funny.

  • @princepersia1 That statement is as inaccurate as your spelling. Please read a book, preferably non fiction for starters.

  • @princepersia1 Thats a rather odd way to be coming out of the closet.

  • islam is not the oldest religion in the world, its judaism who is your stupid bastard

  • @iprenalvedon no... you're wrong

  • there was a man who was indesperate need of blood, his blood type was rare, he was arab, another person was found with the same blood type he was a jew. the jew was reasonable and gave the man blood, the arab gave him a gift, a bentley car (the arab was rich) this happened again the jew again donated his blood, but when the arab sent him a box of chocolate he was astonished and asked why did you give me a box of chocolate???

    the arab replied remember i've got jewish blood now.

    Lol

  • @3BRAHIM "rare" isn't a blood-type lol

  • @iliketha Yes..I know, I never said 'Rare' was a blood-type I said his blood type was rare, so a scarce amount of people had his blood type..

  • @3BRAHIM hahahahahahahahhahaha nice one

  • @ahmadzai6  ;)

  • @3BRAHIM Holy shit I almost pissed myself.

  • Lol jews r Jokerz

  • Batinya I'd like to see the world from your point of view but I dont think theres enough room in your arsehole for my head as well!

  • dude, that's a jewish joke but reversed.............

    the paelstinian says there were no arabs there at the time, at which point the israeli delegate says now i'll start my speech. look it up everywhere

  • Moses lived 4000 years ago and the tribe of judah already existed back then but the palestinians wouldnt exist until another 3970 years. Ok its a joke but its a political joke and ignorant people might think its funny.

  • sin sin salah bin

  • Islam is not a new religion, Islam was first revealed by Prophet Adam (as)....and completed by Prophet Mohammad (asa)... Today Islam is the perfection of all Religions..... Islam represent Peace, Tolerance, Love and humanity.... I am a Muslam but I am not a terrorist.......

  • @Batinya There are even Jewish terrorists. Don't say I am _____ and I _____, it just encourages racism in an attempt to disprove it.

  • @TheJordandelphonic "Every country that borders an Islamic country has suffered raping, pillaging, and torture."?? C'mon what part of the world haven't suffered that? and it's not because of Islam or any religion, it's because of humans. Humans do evil things and when they want to justify it they hide behind religion, politics etc. If Islam offends you so should all other religions. Otherwise its like saying "I'm not racist, only Chinese people offend me"

  • @Edelwaise Beautifully said and you get a 1000 thumbs up.

  • @Batinya

    not yet

    must i mention "TAQUIA"

    a muslim law that says that you must lie to all infidels for the benefit of the muslim nation?

    not every one will buy your false words,every beliving moslim is a closeted terrorist

    judjement day is near, you son of darkness

  • @avr1 goddamn, you're a real jerk!

    you're just another greedy jew who thinks everything is his.

    why don't you take your enormous nose and stick in into your own business, you fucking lawyer. and budhism (not budehizem) exist much longer than 2000 years. it is in fact the FIRST religion. and jewish people are fucking stupid because WHO THE FUCK CUT'S INTO HIS OWN PENIS!!!!!!! dumbass

  • @kalandil Everyone is capable of doing stupid things (more so if they were taught this stupidity is God-ordered), but that doesn't sum up their entire character.

    You sound as tribal-minded and ignoramus as the biggest religious zealot by mentioning things like "greedy Jew, Jewish nose, jewish people are fucking stupid... etc, etc,etc".

    I don't doubt you're trying to make good points, but you're making yourself look pretty bad while doing so.

  • @avr1 Well, perhaps muslim religion tends towards what we know as terrorism as a way to ensure a solid Muslim state, but remember that they were taught, just like you, that their religion is what is right and that it would be a mistake to question these beliefs.

  • A) In Moses' time Y'hudi (Jew) meant of the tribe of Judah. There were members of the tribe of Judah, but...

    B) ...Moses never entered the land of Israel. In the Torah he died before he got there, so the whole joke becomes less funny for that reason.

  • This joke gose the other way around.Mosses hit the rock in Cannan(not palastine), then the water came out and after he did a bath, u noticed his clothes were stolen by palastinians, and then the arab said - " but there weren't palastinians then".

    Jews were b4 the palastinians and the Philistins. cannanites =\= palastinians.

  • Doesn't make much sense really. No one anywhere would try to suggest that in the time of Moses there were no Jews in Palestine. Moses was a Jew after all.

    But he says "a few hundred years ago" rather than "a few thousand years ago." Was Moses still around in the year 1710?

    I guess I don't really get it.

  • Funny, I know this joke the other way around.

    They would say that three thousand years ago moses would bathe, and when he got out he found out that his clothes were stolen by "Palestinians"...

    To which people will obviously reply- "There were no 'palestinians' three thousand years ago. Even the world 'Palestine' didn't exist."

    Funny how he had to shorten it to a few hundreds years to keep his reversed story intact :D

  • Djalili is of the B'ahai faith

  • @TheDan2000 Yea, he's Persian too, living in the UK I believe.

  • Welcome to Middle East politics!

  • this is Bullshit !

    this is not the Joke at all

    the joke talk about an argument between two streams in Judaism

    it is from the Hebrew Talmud

    Moses was a Jew - how come he was After Palestine or in the same time

    the name Palestine was given to the land of Israel after the Roman conquer it

    and it happened 1500 years after moses

  • Lol you fool you think your Jewish in the same way Moses was Jewish? Moses was Jew by race, and arguably by religion (though he would never have heard the term 'Jew' his life, like Palestine, a word also created after him ;). You think because you hold the same religion as him you are a decent from him? Are both your white European and black Ethiopian Jewish brothers also entitled the same land as you by right of decent? Then again, Jesus was a Jew by race but not religion, where was he from?

  • @ShadowSoundsUK

    dude moses was the seed of Israel (Jacob), Israel (Jacob) had twelve sons

    when they reclaim the land of Israel after the 40 years in the desert, the twelve tribes of Israel (Jacob) which represent his twelve sons starts to build the sate, after 100 years or so the Israel nation split into two kingdoms, Israel to the north ( which included 10 tribes) and Judea in the Jerusalem region and the mountain of Judea.

    in the time past the Assyrian conquered Israel (the 10 tribes)

  • Judea is called that way because the controlling tribe there was Judas tribe.

    when the time past the Greek later the Romans conquered Judea. (the time when jesus was born). After the Roman destroyed Judea after the great Jewish rebellion, in order to Insult the Jews they changed the name of Judea to Palestina. the old Philistines where the biggest enemy of Judea and Israel (if you remember the story of David and Goliath the Phlistinian) . the Philistines were invaders from the see.

  • sea* (sorry) so the meaning of Palestine in hebrew comes from the word Paleshet which means invaders.

    and as you may know the end, the Roman sent the people of Judea out of their land.

    and they only reclaim it after 2000 years.

    the name of the people of Judea are the Jews - this is where the name came from.

    this is facts my friend you can found it written in the old testimony or just ask your local priest =]

  • oh and just for the recored ...

    Judaism is not like Islam and Christianity, you cannot become a Jew (it is possible tho but it is a process of at least 5 years) , you can only be born that way, Judaism is both religion and race.

    if you think I'm wrong go find something on the Net about ancient civilizations at that time.

    or easy ask Hitler why did he kill the Jews if not because of their race,

    while destroying their culture.

  • You write a lot, though it seems you didn't read what I said. Most of what you said is irrelevant. Firstly there is a difference between the Palestinian Arabs and the Canaanites. But even disregarding that, yes Moses was the seed of Israel. So the term "Children of Israel" means the decedents of him. So yes the people of Judea are known as Jews, but by RACE. ie 'Jews' REGARDLESS OF RELIGION. This is far different that a Jew by RELIGION who is the decedent of a convert. And why bring up Hitler?

  • you still don't get it ha, the religion of the people of Judea didn't has an official name, like you don't have "the Roman religion" , you can call it "Judaism" tho. the same ceremonies that they did, in Judea (not like the Christians who change it) the Jews of today do. The same to the very end almost

    the only way to be a Jew by religion is to be born a Jew by race. you can't separate it even if you want. the Jews who lives in Israel now are Jews by Religion and Race.

  • That was originally a Jewish joke.

  • LOLOLOLOLOLOLOL

  • This Joke is orignaly made Jews not by Omid Jalili. Common Omid stop stop please make joke uper down.

  • lmfaoooooooooooooooooooooooooo­ooooooo!

  • what is the song played at the end???

  • There were no muslims either....

  • @Razhell And who said that we claim to be muslims ever since?? We weren't, But for sure .. we were canaanites.. But no jews.. AT ALL.

  • Hinduism is the oldest religion, dating back to millions of years ago, gets the facts rite.......and it not hinduism it is vedic knowledge or vaisnavism, all the greatest prophets and gurus have been born there, it is the centre of religion and spirituality, all religions stems from india, including, islam, christianity and so forth....if u dont believe me, do your research

    ciao amigo!

  • wtf millions of years what are you talking about there were no human beings let alone people in india let alone hinduism in india. hinduism is like at highest pushing it really hard like 12000 years old.

  • @QuaziK he said hundreds of years didnt he?

  • @pixie700 well according to all major religions the earth is only about 5000 years old

  • @spike51234 not islam

  • @bensomas25 BACK TO MILIONS YEARS ago where there was no humans or life at all :D ur funny guy

  • haha i love this.

  • hahaha

    -ET

  • pff a SECULAR Jew could have stolen it!

  • The last time I heard this joke it was the palestinians that didn't exist

  • @streetlegal34 Yea I heard it from that perspective too.