Cop and Robber FAIL!

[telyriclemyricle]

acually you know, i will have my way with you.

[cpindcweeworld]

It was probably the Super Troopers

[ilove24purple]

you say house weird House! :P

[satanisawesome87]

Michael Jackson's reanimated body

[0410mushroom]

I'd hire a serial killer

[AvengerMarvel]

I'd tape JB to my door if that doesnt work infect ur doorman with zombie cancer

[TheVirtualRockers]

well i would put something that when doors open it should say this : Come here you bitch i will kill you !!! (shoot,shoot) wait is there someone on the door... i must kill that son of a bitch... 

[fighterdude87]

nothing. im down below in my hidden soundproofed room with the latch discreetly covered by a rug ;)

[naruto1234299]

i would get a bunch of irquiens standing around me

[XxMGKILLER12xX]

a condom or Chuck Norris

[fantasyfan12341234]

a fire breating nija turtle griifin :)

[3rockhopper]

land mines in my yard flame throw at my porch and auto rpgs on the roof

[alexsworld1999]

justin beiber

[unicornluv1000]

lol.............

[riffle666]

MIKE TYSON... people like their ears...

[Ray0Alien]

They must've been black and their neighbors must've been white or asian or anything but black.

Chill I'm half black..

[blackout15243]

@Ray0Alien me too i;m half black too

[TaylorBaylorO8O5]

anyone notice that the fortune it facing the camera. so how can he read it if its not facing him?

[linkiwa123]

Id ghave Mr. Rogers

[piggy770x]

Joe Pesci...gets shit done

[Musicisliberation]

Okay, I know it's too late for this comment to end up in a video, but I think to guard my house, I'd have FPSRussia.

Professional Russian.

[shanaraeden]

Will you be putting any money in your account today?

Haha no i dont really have any money on me, guess im just gonna have to rob the place!

Okay take all the money in my telet just take it all, i dont want any trouble! *Weird face*

Oh no you got me all wrong i was just crackin a joke it was just a joke!

Please dont shoot me, i have a family!

Lady i dont even have a gun!

Well if you must have you way with me!

Okay this is getting weird im gonna leave!

=

!LMFAO!

[XxxxXJediXxxxX]

No one gives a flying FUCK ABOUT FUCKING VICORIOUS SO STOP PUTTING THAT SHIT ON AWESOME VIDEOS YOUTUBE!!!!!!

[ballerinagirl1997]

lol guard lion

[Lalalover543]

Your fortune was backwards

[illwayz313]

Id keep a Canadian on my porch.

[shanaraeden]

@illwayz313 You being racist? hah jusskiddn

[ThePmmz]

I would have a bunch of thorn bushes guarding my house

[EnragedGeeks1]

I'd put army men with plasma guns all over the place like in my house and on my lawn

[MAPG888]

Chuck Norris to guard my house!

[vincemartinez60]

i would have chuck noris and bruce lee and his son i know ther dead but still if you had the money would you

[LEGENDJESTER]

fluffetalks so he can make them laugh their ass off

[stdembicer]

id get like ten navy seals then have them alined around my house so if the police came in the navy seals would just beat the shit out of the police every time they came in so it would be like u crashed the wrong house now u shall die then the navy seals just blow like a bazooka through those bitches

[PurplePythonStudios]

I'd have Chuck Norris protect my house >:D

[xXKONABOY808Xx]

I woas aaa &uld use 4/ wasdf4 3! q&a5°c b4alll11? &+ asdf4

1

[michaelshady]

0:11 lol he was reading the chinese on the back

[kisa885]

have a teasing door.so when they would break my door.they would get teased 2 death

[arkvoodle1995]

I would have a man-eating elephant your awesome the shit

[mmt2095]

2:55 strip tease lolll

[SuperjesusV2]

A hillbilly, the shotgun will scare someone

[PrayAngelicDemon]

The text is in the back of the paper

[CREATIVEART100]

THE WHOLE FREICKIN ARMY!!!!

[northview6]

Chuck Norris.

[sabulba57]

what if you opened a fortune said "That girl has HIV" and you were getting a Blow Job from her...

[Roxycat97]

This video was posted on my birthday :O

[AnimalLov3r911]

I WOULD HAVE A TIGER... I LUV EM

'

[AnimalLov3r911]

CRAP THTS WHO THREW A BOTTLE AND JUSTIN BIEBER... Y MAN Y

[Glowmunster666]

NINJAS!

[TheBrandNameShoe]

id have rebecca black gaurd and whenever the cops came shed sing

[sundaybikes123]

i would have a liger gaurd my house

[mindBender702]

a rele penes

[OmegaAlpha6]

Csonk15: I already do that + bow next to bed crossbow under bed 2 kukri and closet and throwing stars

[isaacsonk15]

I sleep with a knife under my pillow I'm ok

[ImTotallyDrawn]

fluffetalks and elawshea should group up and write a newspaper and make a fortuine

[FallenAngel6162]

Banker-If you must, then have your way with me!- starts taking off shirt-

Guy-Ok this is getting weird I'm gonna leave.....-Leaves, But after a while comes back- Actually, I will have my way with you.......

Me-Lmafo- I can't get enough of this!! I wanna watch it again!

[12345shanny12345]

i dont even know what three of those words are ;p

[TheG4mefreak]

I would put a transformer with the terminator on his shoulder

[sindarny]

i would have chuck norris

[CODHRGOW3]

I would have a gorrilla

[TheOriginalRoyal1]

an elephant

[whieboy97]

i would get my turtle on them! =D

[Infamouscap1211]

i would have a huge mutant cyborg flyes designed to gourd and protect, and when some one would come up they would use there mosquitoes hostages as weapons throwing the mosquitoes at them and while there distracted eliminate the threat.

[1zee2russian]

that pyramid head thing from silent hill :3

[animeskaterboi1]

LMFAOS, xD

[poppypia1]

i'd use a jungle in my house and a lion guarding the door like a butler cause i like lions!!!

[rellemusic]

Chuck Norris on a little pony with a care bear and 512 zhu zhu pets

[MsPeytonRenee]

Id have chuck norris gaurd my house x)

[PirateGinger]

2:26 !!! lmfaoo

[konvict3734]

a zombie terrorist with a recorder on it that just repeatedly says " i keeel youu!!" :D

[G3orge5002]

mines to keep those kids off my damn lawn

[phisher453]

HAOOSE

[heather181998]

u have really pretty eyes:)

[MuMmErT17]

CHUCK NORRIS

[WiiRool]

Speakers with a rope to the front door.. if the door falls you hear Rebecca Black >:)

[masterDrakelolol]

i would chuck norris to protect my house

[Leafelairs1]

Your funny man ya

[Tekforevar]

A door

[TheIScarePeople]

omg u said grandmas boy thats the best move ever

[pkdragon0o]

i would have justin beiber and they would just be like F*** im not dealing with the S***

[wolfcassy2010]

i would have a wolf and have them eat the criminal :P nom nom nom nom babies!!!

[sirnique1]

i would sleep in front of the door so ppl flip if the walk in

[peternaruto9]

id have turrents and tanks and stuff

[Romansssz]

The entire Russian Army? Its pretty huge if you think about it :D

[celtic3650]

id use fluffee as my guard :D

[TheHelljumper22]

hd finnally and this didnot suck

[Hakumo84]

Lydia <3

[CrossCutBrute]

I love fluffee

[Sheoldred1]

Bodyguards~~~

[raginguthixx]

ide get a t-rex to guard it



[cantyangel]

rebecca black wud guard my house if anyone dared to come near it (which they wudnt) she wud sing friday and prom night mixed together....oh wait... IT'S THE SAME SONG!!!!

[MrPoopisyucky]

i liike how u say jouse :)

[badger042006]

row of dead bodies lol

[MikiArtist]

i'd get what i have now, my brother's pitbull named carnage :)

[tourettesguy98]

justin bieber because no one would ever come near it then

[lovelysagebo13]

always say in bed after a fourchon

[13freshiek]

wow i love your eyes.

[KingZeg]

i would have chuck norris guard my house :)

[horridhan]

yur eyes are [retty

[JaAsmiineVelazquez]

i would have osama bin ladden it would be like -hey yu wat the park are yu duing in my house -sir um im the mail man -no no no no mail man tuday just get the park aut of my house -ok ill just leave the mail here sir -mutherrr facker i wi kill yu -sir put the gun down -i wi kill you -ahhhhhhhhh no sir just please take whatever you want but dont shoot -whathever i want eeeh -yes just please -give me the mail -huh?? ok the next day osamma would be the mail man looking like a girl scout lol!!!

[Antonio619MUNOZ]

a rapist

[Demondragon789]

man in black and the expandelbles or something

[Zaidr0n]

i would have will ferrel, the robber would laugh to death...

[MCRlover2134]

id have a dragon

[TudorPangal]

I would use the cup from 2 girls 1 cup as a door guard.

[CutiePieLoL5]

Justin Beiber. :-]

[Kicks2094]

Bruce Lee

[kevin77evans]

where do you hear about these stories???

[lSPlKylelSRSl]

chuck norris

[reivyndawn]

i would have carrot top trying to be funny in front of my house

[spencerreidfan01]

omg i luv you 

[MurderTheMuffin]

Did anybody else notice that when he was reading the "fortune", the words were facing the camera? xD

[pink88990]

I would have rebeca black sing in frount of my house when people come over

[MrsPineapple12358]

@pink88990 HA!!

[testmonkey1173]

kimbo slice and brock lesner would gaurd my house

[KaylaAnimeLover1]

shit on my door steps because no one wants to rob a house with shit on th door step :D

[MrsPineapple12358]

i would have CHUCK NORRIS and a lion and pittbulls and a huge security system tht has rocket launcher ak-47s and lasers and shit like dat!!! try comin in my house and see what happends!!

[BeccaAngles]

I love the way you say "house." (ha-oose)

[carly11car]

a fence mad outta peetree dishes break in and theyll get diseases >:)

[mruniguy]

i would put rebeccablack on my doorstep

[TheTrilbyWill]

FLuffee: the only man to creep himself out, then agree to have sex with himself.

[CountryboyLawrence]

i would have sentry guns 2 lions and attack penguins

[Whitewing9709]

-Please Don't Shoot Me, I Have A Family!

-Lady, I Don't Even Have A Gun.

-If You Must, Then Have Your Way With Me!

-Okaay, This Is Getting Weird I'm Gonna Leave.....Actually I Will Have My Way With You!

LMAOOO x)

[kakacricket]

Gimme the cookie cookie!

[VampireGirlpure]

I would have I would have 10 dragons and a vampire!

[yazmatazmin]

i would have you guard my house!

[XlostXDaliahX]

i would so clone chuck norris!!

[Ghost7065]

Stupid Cops. this goes to show we're paying to much taxes if they cant get their shit together. i be like "Hay assholes u guy got the wrong house...again....now hurry up and go to wall mart and buy me a new door....again.....before i file suit u dumb shits." nah id really be like "Shit here we go again for the 41st Fucking time"

[spidey09070]

i would use my girlfriends vagina because ... welll i dont kno y i would just seems to b a good idea

[scenekiki13]

a picture of justin bieber. id also put it in my garage to scare away the mice

XD

[BigfootSnott]

rebeca black as my guard

[DRAGOON2ONIONKNIGHT]

I love how he reads the wrong side of the fortune lol <3

[abrowncitizen]

A nice old school moat. Like around a castle.

[samurai6788]

my guard would be Rebecca black and a sign that says: "if you go beyond the fence rebecca black will sing without auto tuned,

DANGER BAD SINGING MAY CAUSE DEATH "

[coltbullet01]

i would have you as my gaurd cuz you would scary the cops with your bad humor just kidddinng with yah i would have a dragon to gaurd cuz the drangon would blow fire in the persons face i love your videos fluffee

[GingerNoSoul98]

I would have a sign that say's if you come in here then im gonna get a fat guy to rape you.

[yuniko1998]

i wld hav a giant red button tht says dont push on my door evry1 presses a red button it shoots acid in their face

[grimsreep]

@yuniko1998 which acid?? the drug or battery

[kerri1431]

A LIGER!!!

[SillyBandedGecko]

a komodo dragon and a green anaconda

[kordatscheesy]

I'd get that freight train from inception. One minute theyre robbing your dream house, the next they're an interesting new smear.

[DelSolBoi1]

that fortune cookie was right ;) jk i love FLuffee

[ashybear31]

batman (:



[MyPoop999]

justin bieber singing

[queenluver213]

chuck norris.

[Alienh8ter]

Maybe the people who live in that house are like super super hot, and the cops keep busting in hoping they'll catch them in the middle of having sex........

[hahahahahaTV]

haha, you say "house" like a Scottish person XD

[MrFishWishDish]

I would play rebecca black outside (after imunising myself of course)

[Ms12369]

if i were going to pick something to guard my house, it wud b a singing rebecca black.shed scare everyone away!

[makeupisreligion]

at 3:00 take it off we want tooo seeee you lol .... thums up for the shirt to come off

[BuiltFarmStrong]

Chuck Norris

[OzzyRocksYourSocks]

CLAYMORE

[daisy10171]

i would put cameras up and have a loud ass siren to scare the shit out of them

[XEmoXstarzX]

2:35 is high larius lolz i almost shit \m/ (>.<) \m/ fluffee rules

[iaminsane2140]

id use a suiside bomber

[moltresfiremaster]

ptt screw all that i'd hir chuck norris



[Thomner1]

@moltresfiremaster forget chuck norris, he got the shat beat out of him by bruce lee

[LydiacButler]

rebecca black's singing

[UberChasimA323]

Mike Tyson

[XXXDonkeyxXxPunchXXX]

I own two 9mm handguns and a 30-30 and a .22 rifle. But that's not my primary defense. I pull out my dick and men and women run in fear. It gets dark outside when I have to do that. Animals usually start burrowing and what not.... It turns to winter when I pull out my dick because it blocks so much sunlight.

[CrimsonWilder2226]

@XXXDonkeyxXxPunchXXX fail sir, fail.

[XXXDonkeyxXxPunchXXX]

@CrimsonWilder2226 Aww! Somebody has no jokes?

[CrimsonWilder2226]

@XXXDonkeyxXxPunchXXX didnt really need a joke for that, a fail is a fail.

[XXXDonkeyxXxPunchXXX]

@CrimsonWilder2226 You're sad....

[CrimsonWilder2226]

@XXXDonkeyxXxPunchXXX if thats really what you think sure go ahead.

[CrimsonWilder2226]

@XXXDonkeyxXxPunchXXX if thats really what you think sure go ahead.

[XXXDonkeyxXxPunchXXX]

@CrimsonWilder2226 Yep. I will.

[SteelBloodHound]

I'd have a lava moat, build a wall, and have a full army of archers!

[visi8ns]

A black guy

[xxdreasianxx]

u jumped at @1:15

[nikkiwikkidoodle]

pause at 3:33 fluffee making a funny face

[hackforloser]

Dat lighting