Let's Take A Long Look At Last Alert part 1/7

[paleknight1]

The highest class CHUCKA NORRIS

[LordHippoman]

It's bad when I can't tell if it's Diabetus doing a voice or an actual character voice.

[AlkalineBatterien]

The voice acting of the majority of the characters in this games sounds like a fan-dub.

[Skrimpish]

lol i forgot about chairman steve

[RyutheWeredragon]

To be fair, in it's time, this game was fun, bad acting and such notwithstanding.

[wizeoaldowl]

This may be one of the easiest games I've ever seen.

[waffleless]

13:30 He has been taking prison?

[Foxboy106]

lol the japanese rambo

[Suzaku000]

Note the Crown of Thorns on the Force Project's logo. Clearly they are a Judeo-Christian organization.

[RPGFan28]

The Japanese version was called Red Alert, it was changed to Last Alert upon localization.

[shimazu32]

I'm simultaneously reminded of Ikari Warriors, Guerilla War, and the overhead parts of Bionic Commando.

[grottypissedstained]

I love the pauses in the dialogue.

[someonenow1]

Government of Lloyd.

Makers of the government mandated barbecue.

[CrossedCelt]

I'm sorry, Chairman Steve? What the hell?

[EdmacZ]

1:43-1:46.

And it is here, where we are introduced to the first of what would become many memorable Wrongpurae characters. Mike Dawson, Earnest Evans, Cobra, Rock Knight, but Guy Kazama set the stage.

[notyoursavior78]

I still love when you "level up" you get a new title that usually isn't very practical or logical.

It's awesome too how Slowbeef and Diabetus commented on this when they were both in the same room.

[Kiyashire]

All of the voice actors sounds like thirteen-year-old boys with absolutely no experience. X_X

[GeneticKH]

bomberman?

What about the triple fudge?

[DaRkLoRdZoRc]

5:45 "I claim this hostage in the name of Mars! Isn't that LOVELY?"

[Suzaku000]

5:48

That was probably the guy who did the voice of Barney Gumble.

[Psychopulse75]

@Suzaku000 I was thinking the same thing. We're just missing the burp...

[Doperwtje81]

1:19

'with your 4 powers combined, I am Skeletor Jesus!'

[JDWtri]

The bullets are so slow and sparse, it's like the exact opposite of a bullet hell game... BULLET HEAVEN!

[Kuronji]

"You have successfully torched you're partner burning him alive, wakka wakka!"

[futonrevolution]

It's a bit embarrassing, that I get a sense of satisfaction, when my video responses are approved by the RP Cool Kids Club. I'm batting a 1.0.

[pockypurse]

I swear the narrator at the beginning says "We, the special mission unit, were sent here to rescue HOSSAGES".

[Icerama108]

05:51 Wait, oh my god, I just realized, that was the same voice actor for three people in that scene!

[evilkirby4]

You two should drink more often. good things happen when you two drink.

[FoolyCoolyMabase]

@TimidOrgy It's a very metaphorical thing to write on a church if you think about it

[NamoNakamura]

"You may want to stick with the gun instead of the sword, just sayin'."

"Speaking of 'Saiyan'..."

[SD91]

The voice of the hostage needs to be in way more games nowadays. I think I would actually be more interested in games like Gears of war, Dead space or uncharted...

[troysson81]

@CTrace:

Are you serious?

[E0000B6FAF25838]

I'm willing to bet that they just used the programmers as voice actors. "We wasted our budget on placing green toolboxes and ID cards everywhere, so we can't afford real voice actors... who here knows how to read?" And I want to know who did the voice casting? I want to slap the moron who chose the voice for the president. He sounds like a 16 year-old kid.  And I just love the casual "about 50 km Northwest of the crash site." Who's benefit is that for?

[grindorblackout1986]

@E0000B6FAF25838 on the plus side...at least there was no FFX laughing scene...that I know of

[thapoint09]

@E0000B6FAF25838:

Really? I wanna kiss the guy for choosing such gutbustingly awful voice actors.

[CommanderMantis]

I thought it was against the law for stealth fighters to have red tinted windows.

[leviathan1173]

That "voice acting" is PAINFUL to listen to, it's almost as bad as the Deathtrap voices.

[thapoint09]

@leviathan1173:

But twice as funny.

[leviathan1173]

@thapoint09

This is true.

[FlameHasChannel]

@leviathan1173 You want voice acting? House of the Dead 2/Typing of the Dead

[CheezeFox]

@leviathan1173 At least the voice actors in this game sound like they have clear nasal passages...

[Goldbloodeddragon]

Hey guys, this is Chairman Steve, the newest member to our super evil club! Remember, no girls allowed!

[psychogorilla]

This is one of the first time I've seen a semi-competent playing of a gayme in any given LP.

[godsavant]

I keep forgetting they're not actually playing this, just watching a Longplay.

[Avirosb]

Sweet, I was born in the future.

[rjakobi]

I'm sorry, but...Chairman STEVE?

[TheToast7]

As bad as Last Alert is, it's way better than Rise of the Dragon and Star Strike. Honestly Last Alert is just silly, while the other two are legitimately bad.

[Goodguy33]

@TheToast7 Last alert at least looks like a fun little action game. Star Strike is a crappy laserdisc ripoff and Last Dragon looks boring as hell.

[msampson3d]

Slowbeef keeps referring to the character being played as himself. I thought the he said the longplay was done by Cubex55.

[TheToast7]

@msampson3d DRUNK

[lobsopdoy]

@msampson3d

Keep in mind that they were both really drunk when they did the commentary.

[RiiidgeRaacer]

The guy looks like if Kenshiro had some kind of bastardised mutant child with Rambo.

[TonyBranston]

Who fholds a handgun with both hands when firing from the hip?

[MidnightMidna]

Why is it every adult male in this game sounds like they're going through puberty?

[Davtwan]

Cubex55!? Holy crap, I saw a lot of his videos. I never thought he and his friends longplays would be featured here.

[CandiFan1]

"Speaking of saiyan."

[Mefuki]

Wow. Wow! This is easily the funniest one they've done. Instead of just making fun of a guy and calling him stupid, they're actually making fun of the video itself wthout getting contemptuous. It's great!

[inferno232]

He entwusted me with the task. XD

[MezaseMaster]

You shouldn't have placed that bomb near that time bomb.

[Piroborian]

So, why is Dr. Garcia a pointy eared red devil robot?

[SuperMario16bit]

watching these all stoned on 4/20.

Fuck yeaaah!

[usernameclassifeid]

@SuperMario16bit I bet that was awesome.

[SuperMario16bit]

@usernameclassifeid you bet brudda, I finally realized how many internet brownie points Diabetus has. It's a big number.

[COWBOYSANDBEER]

Even though that was Diabetus doing the Wocka-wocka during the pre-boss dialogue with the hostage, I wouldn't blame anyone for thinking that was actually in the game at first.

Most viewers probably wouldn't put it past the creators of this game to include something that weird anyway, would they?

[ILIKECEREALX]

1:04 - If you have a problem, if no one else can help, and if you can find them....maybe you can hire The A-Team.

[Ebb1993isgreat]

@ILIKECEREALX *plays the A-Team theme*

[BohepansTheThird]

At around 5:50 or something:

I actually cannot tell - who said Wakka Wakka? Was that Diabetus...or the voice actor for that Muppet hostage character? Please tell me the hostage did not say WAKKA WAKKA for absolutely no discernible reason... This voice acting is already (hilariously) bad enough.

[lich109]

@BohepansTheThird that was the muppet. I know. In later sections of the game other characters also say things for no reason as well.

[okjust]

@BohepansTheThird What are you, stupid?

[Skinnyoompalumpa]

Make more!

[gaminggoddess85]

1:26 Mr. Croquet?

[Gaiacarra]

is that the lper talking over the video, or is the voice acting really that bad

[lich109]

@Gaiacarra It's fucking horrible. Oddly enough, the Japanese voice acting sucks too.

[xValis77x]

3:10 ATATATATATATATAT ATATATATATA!

[Grendelynden]

@xValis77x Omae wa mo shindeiru!

[sonicfeet]

"O mae sutazu endo gatasu!

"AAAAAH-- WOCKA WOCKA"

[CruelestChris]

1:17 I can't be the only one who mentally cued up the Golden Axe character select theme here.

[streeterville773]

@CruelestChris Don't worry, you weren't. haha

[xValis77x]

this game was made by the same company that made the valis series? And to think i bear the name >.>

[kattmataren]

@xValis77x

I haven't actually read VALIS, but it seems like a strange thing to base video games on. Not that that has ever stopped anyone...

[xValis77x]

@kattmataren thats never stopped me hence the name i'll longplay or valis II and i hope they see it it has crappy voice acting but then again it's the same company that made this game.

[DLAlucard]

In that jet liner crash scene, im surprised you did not mention the fact the guy must have been a giant. I mean look at the size of him compared to the grenades which are usual the size of a persons hand.

[Urmean15]

FUCKING LLOYD

[Fairtravian]

The CIA agent reminds me of SuperJoe.

[sakatobi]

lol the voices in this game...

[PickpocketSan]

So if Diabetus did the voice for the later boss, then who voiced the first boss, Chip Cheezum?

[supershadey09]

Jack Slate vs Guy Kazama. Place your bets

[HHKelevra]

Ranger > Sharpshooter > Sniper > Corporal > Special Forces > Captain > Major

That's the best rank structure I've ever seen.

[Grammaton485]

Why does this sound like it was voice acted in a basement by high school kids?

[SaitoKojima]

@Grammaton485

Probably was. XD

[d89891]

Holy shit i had this forgot all about it.

[streeterville773]

The newest Retsupurae you guys did had to be the funniest ever! You ever think about doing something like that for Metal Gear 2? (I know you already written up on it on your website)

[SpyWhoLovedHimself]

"Colonel Gaddot of Libid" = "Colonel Gadaffi of Libya"

[horngatekeeper]

@SpyWhoLovedHimself In the Gaddot of Eden, Baby...

[DaRkLoRdZoRc]

So THIS is how to make a good TG16 game! Take characters from a popular 1980's anime, put them in blepharospasmic cutscenes composed of still images between each level, 'make' the levels by placing the NES Metal Gears and Super C in a blender and reskinning the results, uggrade the result to 16-bits (More like 12-bit, but we'll be generous.), then give everyone Animation Magic VA's and cram it all onto a CD!

brb, making a sequel starring Tank Buster Goku, voiced by Jeffrey Rath. I'll be rich!

[OtherRealmer]

Since when does Kenshiro use guns?

[rjakobi]

...I'm still trying to get over the Chairman Steve part.

[ZZDaikun]

Oh, wow. Cubex55. I discovered his account a couple of years ago. His thorough playthroughs are really impressive.

[xValis77x]

@ZZDaikun i never thought they get retsupaed 0_0 i guess no one is safe

[GregEdgar88]

5:41 why did he take Marvin The Martian hostage?

[GTtheEpic]

This is what I do when I get drunk. Spring break 2011

[AzureHalfbreed]

This really isn't a retsupurae. It two people pretending a Let's Play. I still find it funny that SlowBeef is talking like he's playing it himself.

[Ephabia]

@AzureHalfbreed Retsufrashs are basically LPs, this isn't an LP because they didn't actually play the game and there are straight MSTings by Diabetus on this channel, here and over on Chip's they riff on non-game videos as well. I'll never get why the Internet is so obsessed with terminology sometimes.

[insertnamehere765]

I guess that slowbeef is so drunk is that he's randomly tapping his keyboard as he's recording, thinking he's actually doing something.

[BlackKnight03]

You know the horrible truth about Retsupurae commentary is that it's basically the same as Slowbeef's Let's Plays, minus the fact he needs a guide since he stumbles around half the time. Makes me question if they were really drunk, more than the fact they retreaded over the same jokes quite a few times.

[ChrisStavros]

@BlackKnight03

You heard it here first, Slowbeef is a washed out one-trick pony and it's time for the blue star to move on to the next sheriff in town, Jack Srate.

Enjoy the view.

[Ephabia]

@BlackKnight03 Was this a sudden revelation or was this commentary over a video = commentary over a video a touch equation to crack, with a white board and everything?

[AndrewTJ31]

team killing grenade throwers in the jeeps

[Newbiespud]

Oh why did I spend an hour and a half watching the whole thing..

[CasualVideoGamer]

That flamethrower's so kaizo.

[Gight77]

its always nice to be on a first name basis with everyone you meet

[Pooky1991]

They must have been smashed because I keep forgeting that their not actually playing the game, yet their commenting as if they did.

[Technicolor909]

Please get drunk more

[8Rezon]

I thought the intro said "Recently, Diabeetus got bombed and passed away." for a second there

[MrCadefulp]

@8Rezon Just imagine how depressing it would be just to hear slowbeef comment on Last Alert in a really monotone voice. Wow, sounds like the basis for a crappy creepypasta.

[RoyStorey]

@MrCadefulp "Then Slowbeef started screaming randomly while hyper-realistic blood dripped over the Unregistered Hypercam logo"

[Mickothebest]

@RoyStorey "Diabeetus cried in such a way that I nearly thought it was real. Guy Kazama turned around, this time, his sprite had hyper-realistic eyes. I wanted to turn it off but then a SKELETON POPPED OUT"

[AshmoreVid]

dem voices...

[NeverForgetWizet]

That guy is pretty badass. I'm just saiyan.

[StickNinja]

At first I wasn't sure if that was actually supposed to be the original voice work

[Muffinman991]

the game sounds like it was really poorly fan-dubded.

[lich109]

@Muffinman991 So it was done by 4kids then.

[BigJuicyx3]

I'M GUY KENSHIRO BITCH!

[NWHPjpplayer1]

President Almond?

[horngatekeeper]

You cannot have a villain named Chairman Steve. You just can't.

[DatWittyName]

@horngatekeeper

I'm pretty sure this game proves you wrong.

[ENM173]

@horngatekeeper Last Alert dares to push the boundaries of what you can and can't do.

They said you couldn't have voice acting this bad, but Last Alert proved them wrong!

[Rogueofmv]

I can't wait for you to level up to Cadet!

[MitchZer0II]

If this is a commentary of PCE CD longplay, shouldn't this be a RongPrae?

[KedViper]

Aw, sweet, everyone should use Blip.

[drakesdrum1]

I liked how the guys in the pointless turtle jeeps were throwing grenades at you... which didn't move any faster than the jeep. Were they just throwing them directly up, or what?

[JanitorAntisocial]

A Longplay? With competent gaming ability? And no commentary?

I guess this makes Cubex55 the best LPer Retsupurae has ever featured.

[ResidentVarmint]

@JanitorAntisocial

Maybe he had a REALLY grating voice, and decided against commentating.

[IncredibleMD]

@JanitorAntisocial This is probably also the only retsupurae that doesn't make fun of the LPer at all.

[GyroZancross]

@JanitorAntisocial *nerd power activate!* Actually, Cubex55 isn't one person; the channel were all the longplays are featured belong to different people, and the channel just acts as a single page to feature them all.

[notyoursavior78]

@GyroZancross

Yeah I watched that channel before play through some of the new Sam and Max games because I was bored I guess. It actually was pretty entertaining. Oft times I just want to see gameplay anyway and not hear somebody talk over the game. Retsupurae though is one of those exceptions because they are so damned funny.

[Cheetah1251]

@JanitorAntisocial

BillyMC could kick this guys *ss.

[TonyBranston]

@JanitorAntisocial T-0815 actually

[SamuraiFoochs]

Chairman Steve is the best villain name ever.

[POOPTURTLE]

I like how a guy named "Garcia" looks like every fucking anime villain ever.

[piwbenzyna]

Yup Cubex55 is awesome and it's few guys channel actually

[MrJoker773]

Hmm, I wonder why the TurboGrafx didn't do well in America?

[NelStone1]

Might as well have given you a ping pong paddle to knock back enemy shots.

[TonkarzOfSolSystem]

This was hilarious, up there with Dead to Rights as one of the best of these sorts of things (I watched the whole thing on blip). Credit to Cubex55 for actually playing the game, he did well too.

[downphoenix]

that Retsupurae was AWESOME. Hope to see more like these.

[MadSurge]

Brb, posting my emotional resumee on eBay. You never know, there might be some lonely mad scientist out there.

[ColonelVile]

In the time 3:25, war was beginning. 

[ZippAgain]

More like Guy Kenshiro, amah rite?

[Sye909]

@ZippAgain I don't know how many people watching this will get that reference, so i feel obligated to acknowledge your brilliance.

[StormChamber00]

"Speaking of saiyan"

oh slowbeef

[Knifegash]

I feel my hand longing for my forehead every time he almost catches up to those baseballs.

[shockraid1]

Slowbeef will never ski free.

[saguarodundee]

How drunk are you when you make these? slowbeef/ diabutus?

[sentient02970]

We're slowly going to drive jeeps and motorcycles at you

[dahlycanwithblackfur]

13:13 Look! It's Arnold Wesker!

[MrBoomies]

Part 1/7

Jesus Christ.

[dragonclaw9000]

Say what you will about the quality of the acting, but it's really quite amazing that there's so much voice in this game. I didn't think this was possible in this era. Apparently the TurboGrafx was quite powerful?

[Ephabia]

@dragonclaw9000 Not really, it had a more powerful GPU than Nintendo and Sega at the time but that was about it. But it was the first home console with a CD addon and horrible voice acting was a trademark of the early CD era, Turbografx just was a few years early.

[gaminggoddess85]

@dragonclaw9000 I'm pretty sure Castlevania: Rondo of Blood (same system) had a ton of voice acting too, so Last Alert isn't that special.

[mattr75]

That bit with the skeleton crushing the earth logo was priceless.

[Psydecar]

This looks and sounds a lot like Heavy Barrel.

[TheDonaldPierce]

WHERE IN FUCK IS PART 2?

[DayBreakization]

@TheDonaldPierce Just watch it on Blip. I doubt breaking the Caps Lock key is going to get their attention.

[FinalGamerJames]

The sound is much more balanced on Youtube than on blip.tv somehow, thanks for uploading this guys! This is gonna be fucking epic.

[mrplow321]

Retsujacku!