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From: kiklop777
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  • dolphins are amazing... but they don't have super-powers

  • Dolphins sucks? Lol, what a fucking moron.

  • stupid and hot...the best of both worlds

    

  • Am i the only one who tried to finish Penn introduction with "Good Eats"?

  • Ok, Ok but dolphins are not fish, they are mammals. Maybe Penn says this on purpose in this early segment of the show but shame if anybody don't know this.

  • @tvastar i don't know if it's true for every fish/mammal question, but you can see whether such an animal is a fish or a mammal by looking at the tail fin: if it's horizontal (like a dolphin) the animal is a mammal, if the tail fin is verticle (like a goldfish) it's a fish

  • Dolphins don't suck. Penn and Teller even used one to help with a magic trick in one of their videos.

  • @help4343 i think they don't criticise dolphins in general. they criticise pepole who are... well... taking it a step too far.

    but hey, Dolphins aren't stupid. heck, the military uses them! and they have standards!

  • @help4343 Yeah, we know, they're just yucking it up here. They take issue with the people who think they're magic is all.

  • ok to all of you assholes who are saying fuck you dolphins or whales or mosquitos or whatever SHUT THE HELL UP!!! they are just animals, they don give a shit if humans post them in a prestigious magazine or if they worship them are gods or demmons, THEY DONT!!! they are just animals and they only come to fulfill a determinated paper inside nature so stop bitching around like little kids and get over it!!!!!

  • Dophins are lovely MAMMALS, but they are not more amazing than other smart animals like, rats, birds, or humans... super power wise.

    XD

  • This show causes me acute forehead pain. Facepalms really hurt...

  • Am i the only guy who laughed when the subtitles said he is dead now?

  • One of these them dolphins are going to realise that their cuteness can be used to lure human prey

  • Thumbs up if you're watching this in hopes of hearing a "Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy" reference.

  • "They're not mammals. Don't give me that 'they have tits to feed their babies shit.'

    Fuck them, they're fish."

    Oh man, I'm dying over here.

  • There are some fucked up people in this world.....

  • so long so long so long thanks for all the fish

  • Well, after all the dolphins left earth without the use of a spacecraft!

  • Out of 35 pages of comments, wonder how many say "So long, and thanks for all the fish"?

  • So long, and thanks for all the fish!

  • 7:23 sounds like it said "ooooh fuck" ......"fuck that shit" and then it laughed

    lmao

  • This is the most random thing to create a bullshit episode about

  • I wish I could post a video of my dog's reaction to the people making dolphin sounds... even my dog knows these people are nuts!

  • "I took LSD a hundred times at the tank."

    That explains everything.

    

  • She sounds like the girl from Porky's

  • That guy was assassinated by the dolphins because he was learning their secrets.

  • There fish... You're an idiot.

  • Vampire bats have more "powers" than dolphins. They use echolocation (like dolphins) but also have heat sensing organs and can "see" your body heat. That's how they find veins close to the surface.

  • @CamillaCalamity Yeah, but dolphins are pretty xD 

  • why doesn't the short guy talk?

  • @nancy6ify He's not really short, Penn is just freakishly tall in comparison.

  • Fuck you dolphin and whale!

  • orcas beat dolphins, fins down! fuck dolphins, little cheery bastards.

  • I'll be honest, Im more interested in killing and eating a dolphin than I am in swimming with one

  • @arkie74

    Please for the love of god stop quoting that fucking South Park episode. This is even worse than "I'm Rick James bitch".

  • @kingboobs20 I'm Rick James Bitch, and i fuck dolphins...... cocaine's a hell of a drug!

  • Dolphins are mammals. You should know, your a fat slimey looking walrus fucking piece of shit. Ppl are we-todds. WTF is the deal with those ppl??? Hahaha its funny shit.

  • @fockyoumang of course they are mammals, dumbfucks who are saying they are fishes they just dont know shit mi agree with you jajaja

  • The title sequence for this season is the best IMO. Classier than the earlier seasons, and more understated than the latter ones.

  • This is without a doubt one of the funniest bullshit episodes

  • 4 people are dolphins on lsd

  • Creepiest shit ever.

  • I guess this people must have seen Flipper, and thought it was a historical documentary.

  • Teller has really great legs...

  • I can talk to dolphins and the one that lived with Mrs.Howe said "you're crazy, leave me alone and stop taking LSD in my house!"

  • Took lots of drugs...LOL

  • well theres this fish!! well its not realy a fish but some people say it smells like fish!! its pink, wet, and juicy!!! it cures depression TRUST ME!!!! :3

  • They left out the craziest: They kill their own young so they can toss them around playing catch and have an excuse to have sex again.

  • @Jaydoggy531 but dolphins exist all around the world, and infanticide has only been recorded off the cost of scotland and near the beaches of virginia. 1% of humans are psychopaths, wouldn't it be logical to assume the same true of dolphins?

  • @GeatMaster

    Can't tell if trolling but I'll respond: It's also been found in California and Florida. Dolphins aren't the only creatures who kill young in order to make new mates. It also happens frequently in wild cats, especially lions.

  • @Jaydoggy531 I wasn't aware that it was found in california and florida too... but i'm well aware that other animals do it, it was common practice in humans for thousands of years--frequently appearing in the legends of rome and in the bible for instance--i was objecting to the way that it seemed like you were dismissing the species, (judging from the language "they left out the craziest [behavior]"), based on what some members of it did.

  • @Jaydoggy531 this like i do with my faimly unship with more sex and killing

  • Dolphins are beautiful creatures with an asshole side. Just like the rest of us.

  • at 3:45 ,I think watching an episode of Xena warrior princess could do the same thing for her.

  • ya! "fuck dolphins" XD

    

  • I hate Penn & Teller. I love dolphins and would rather associate with dolphins than these two establishment cocksuckers. Dolphins are nearly as intelligent as human beings, and deserve to be treated with respect.

  • @JasonDamisch P7T are very openly and outright anti-extablishment.

  • @JasonDamisch get your facts straight before you say something. Treated with respect you mean? what about all these waterpark that make dolphins do silly shit just to entertain us humans, Ive seen dolphins getting trained to simulate sex with other people, just to have a cheap laugh, so who's being the intelligent creature here?? and is the same thing with monkeys and chimpanzees in captivity, they are also considered nearly as intelligent but we humans just use them for cheap entertainment.

  • @JasonDamisch You do know that dolphins are the most prolific serial killers of the ocean. They're the only animals next to chimps that kill and rape other animals for no apparent reason, even their own young. Dolphins may be intelligent but I wouldn't give them any respect or dignity, nor anyone who still has innocent images of flipper bored into their skull. Fuck dolphins and anyone who likes them.

  • @JasonDamisch I bet you also eat magic mushrooms and believe in global warming, you hippie loser.

  • @TheCircusReject nothing wrong with mushrooms you fool, and what relation does that have with the topic global warming?

  • @pzqlak Because you sound like the typical white-knighting ecofreak that the world has too many of.

  • @TheCircusReject and you sound like looser

  • @pzqlak I think you mean "loser". Please, do us all a favor and go back to school.

  • @JasonDamisch Maybe as intelligent as some human beings.

  • I wonder if that chick at 3:50 makes that sound when shes gettin fucked?

  • @arkie74 no she makes the sound at 4:00

  • @arkie74 i would fuck the shit outta her if thats true

  • FUCK YOU DOLFIN!!!!

    FUCK YOU WHAAALLE!!!!

  • Comment removed

  • @arkie74 CHICKYN ANDA COW!!!!

  • @7:30, i thought it was a dolphin not donald duck.

  • sooooo

    what is it!!!!?

    PENN

    WHAT ARE DOLPHINS WITH SUPER POWER!!!

    TELL MEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!

  • A dog is smarter than a dolphin.

    Man: Can you say "Humanoid"?

    Dog: "Go fuck yourself!"

    Man: Wow! Three of the most popular word in the English dictionary. Your smarter than a dolphin.

    Dog: Coz' I aint got no blowholes bitch! Now get me some treats before I flip you off!!!

  • 3:41 to 3:57 She was being raped by a Dolphin ghost

  • 3:41 That really creeped me out.

  • @ 3:57 switch into 2nd gear lol. sounds like a stick shift when u ride a gear lower

  • WTF? Are these people retarded?

  • I'VE DONE 1000'S OF HITS OF ACID! HAHAHAHAHHAHAH!

  • "Institute" is the latin for basement.

  • sexism is something those two men need to prove half the fucking population on earth.

  • fuck Dolphins, more evil than Chimpanzee can swim at 40 miles per hour, kill their own babies. SHARKS FTW!!

  • penn>ted williams

  • Gawd, I thought that was a (piss-take) picture of Chief Brody from Jaws at 5:59. LOL

    "Smile you son of a.... oh, you are" hehe.

  • For some reason, it's conspiracy theorists who react THE MOST. I don't know why. They just do.

  • dolphins gang rape and murder for entertainment, look it up.

  • 3:40

    Why did she stop talk OHMY GOD WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON HELP ME MOMMY I CAN SEE FOREVER

  • dolphins r the smiling assasins never turn ur back on something thats cobstantly smiling and laughing u know dolphins r really taking the piss out of u wen hes in a group with his buds cause he can cause he knows u dont speak dolphin . racist fucks

  • weird but hot..

  • The cool think about Dolphins. If you find a feral puppy dog or kitty cat they are wild and violent.

    Dolphins are frendly.

  • Lol and we call ourselves an intelligent species! fn amazing!

  • I swear that that hippy couple was on wifeswap.

  • I never trusted dolphins. I heard that when they get their freak on they're not too picky!

  • P&T should do an episode about why all the really hot women are also really weird.

  • P&T should do an episode about why all the really hot women are also really weird.

  • I LOVE dolphins. as far as amazing creatures go, they in my top ten. They 're surprisingly intelligent, they're affectionate, they're surprisingly human like in psychology, and they've been known and have been filmed keeping sharks at bay with their mere presence. As great as Dolphins are, i wouldn't rely on them to win the lottery.

    People who believe Dolphins are psychic are morons

  • Screw dolphins, narwhals are the shit. they're like sea unicorns.

  • @DestroyedArkana Narwhals stopped the cthulhu from eating me. . .

  • Fuck you whale, Fuck you DOLPHIN!

  • @questionauthoritah Chicken an a caaww?! CHIKEN AN A CAAAAWW!?!?!??!!? FAK U CHICKEN FAK U CAAAWW!!!!!!!

  • @Kelol100 Ummmm, ok.

  • even assuming dolphins are indeed smart, why is the stupid doctor teaching the dolphin such advanced words? isnt that putting too much faith in the dolphin's intelligence? which child started with the word "humanoid" anyway, shouldnt they be practicing pronunciation first?

    then again maybe dolphins cant speak, yeah lets go with that

  • @poppydephary Are you the fucking doctor here? Let the man do his lifes work, we're all on the edge of our seats waiting for his conclusion about the intelligence of these gay ass fish.

  • @alderaforall i suppose you would teach your children 3 syllable words from the very start of learning english too

    if no improvement is shown, there shouldnt be any progression to a higher level, that was what i meant in my previous statement

    and we cant wait for his conclusion on the intelligence of dolphins, he is dead

  • The theme song for "Bullshit" for season 5-Present is SOOO catchy. I sometimes rewind just to hear it again. :)

  • So long and thanks for all the fish.

  • @NateTahGreat awesome reference :)

  • I usually agree with Penn and teller but DOLPHINS ARE ARE NOT "FUCKING FISH!"

    They are marine mammals, is a leopard seal also a "fucking fish"? Just because you say fuck and talk loud doesn`t necessarily make it so.

  • @Kenoiteful He was being facetious. Did you miss the parts where he acknowledged that they produce milk and other mammalian traits?

  • penn's commentary at around 4:00-4:10 pretty much sums it up.

  • Are they fish or a mamal does not make any difference. Are they so intelligent as we are or not, that makes no difference. They are intelligent enough to understand, feel. That is not bullshit. And one think I can agree is that they are really not telepats and have to be left alone.

  • "Fuck them! They're fish"

  • I didn't know that people were stupid enough to think dolphins have super powers, the only dolphins I know that do are the 1972 dolphins.

  • one tard missed the like button

  • They're maaaammmmaaalllllllsss! Also, not the gateway to enlightenment, much like most other mammals. I....sort of want to see what a dolphin does when it's on LSD.

    I AM A BAD PERSON :(

  • When the phrase come up "He's Dead Now" it made me laugh hahaha

  • And you americans wonder why everyone thinks your stupid, I mean I don't, but people like retarded vibrating dolphin noise lady is all we get to see in the rest of the world. You need to work on your media immage. Or government forced sterillization.

  • "She's weird" is an understatement.

  • we've gone plum crazy.

  • No...No...she really did not just make a dolphin sound....I refuse to believe that people can be THIS stupid....

  • Fuck them, they're fish.

  • They're fish! Yeah in the same sense that we humans are fish. Ref. AronRa's channel. LMAO!

  • they smile so they're stoned or fucking with us

  • ... oh how i hate dumbasses who can't separate their fantasies from reality... yeah communicate with dolphins.. whales.. trees.. energy... dead people.. if real life is so uneventful and mundane for you, smash your brains in and maybe you can turn your mental clock back to that of an 2 year old... start having conversations with furniture again. or do what most other phat jackoffs do, play WoW and mastrubate to your orc thief or something.

    retards

  • @behemuth Well said

  • @6:57 - that's just too much...'humanoid? waaaaaaaah!' that's about the funniest shit i've seen in a long time...

  • Well, dolphins are extremely intelligent - probably on par with gorillas and chimpanzees - but they're incomparable to humans. Yeesh.

  • @jediphoenix ... no they are not... several species of birds are smarter than dolphins

  • Seriously these people seem mostly mad. Having swam with wild dolphins in Egypt it was an interesting experience, but certainly not life changing. Although the Dolphins must get something out of the human interaction too other than just easy food. Apparently these same dolphins had come back to this same village every year for the last eight years. The village charged tourists and the dolphins stayed a few months.  Assume they made enough to survive till the same time next year.

  • Who cares about Dolphins when there are Octopuses in the sea! ;)

  • Shes weird ,but HOT,,,

  • Ah, good old Masshole.

  • What the fuck is wrong with the chick at 4:01?

  • Definitivamente: hot but weird.

  • "... which is the latin term for took lots of drugs." ROFLMAO ! :)

  • sounds like she's getting off

  • So long and thanks for all the fish

    So sad that it should come to this

    We tried to warn you all but oh dear?

  • What in the HELL is up with that noise that bitch is making???

  • I have autism and have heard that dolphins can cure it. I've never belived that.

  • @PinkPunkyKat actually... i think the "dolphin" bullshit "cure" happens because the kid spends precious time with the FAMILY and other people while swiming with dolphins...

    Leave the autistic kid alone with Dolphins and absolutely nothing is going to happen.

  • @Sincrol  This...

  • @Sincrol The kid is gonna get raped.

  • @IndigoR i lold! hahaha

  • @PinkPunkyKat Yep! Stick your dick in a dolphin and you'll be more social!

  • 8:20 F'D UP!!!!!

  • Penn would probably regret calling bullshit on dolphins when the world ends and they all fly into space with jetpacks calling out "So long, and thanks for all the fish!"

  • wtf isn't that bad to have birth in salt water??? a lot of salt..cold water? bad for baby?

  • there are freaks out there

  • Fuck them theyre fish! God Ive been saying that FOREVER..I got into arguments with teachers about this...

  • she's weird......but hot ahahaha, you americans, wat are you like. penn and teller is a shit-hot show!!

  • Anyone who relies on Penn & Teller as somehow being 'authorities' regarding cetacean intelligence has to have a screw loose in their own head. We're talking about a couple of sideshow hucksters here who like to perform amusing illusions for gullible audiences - not qualified marine biologists or experts in anything approaching the ability to assess intelligence in aquatic species...or species of any sort, for that matter.

  • @TheMercilessEye ill listen to the experts they have on the show instead, thanks.

  • I love Penn and Teller, but they REALLY need to get off their bullshit kick about never trying drugs and take some LSD. Or at the very least they should take some magic mushrooms. Those are good for you. VERY good.

    I can't believe how many people go their entire lives without taking a psychedelic. It's like spending your entire life indoors and never going outside once. You will just never understand what it is you're missing. And it's a LOT.

  • @spanky46758 Damn, I guess you should count yourself as one of the billions of people that need to gain enlightenment through the sacrament of acid (or any psychedelic; I recommend psilocybe mushrooms in doses over 4 grams dried).

    Inexperience and improper guidance has given you a narrow mind, but there's help and hope. I know it hurts to grow, but it must be done.

  • @JoshSitar daves not here man

  • @spanky46758 Bullshit! I JUST saw him 2 minutes ago!

  • @JoshSitar

    I enjoy shrooms and all. But I really wouldn't like to be associated with you.

  • @PoloniumSmoker Right, because you know me SO well. Duh.

  • @JoshSitar

    Sometimes judging works.

  • "they smile so its clear they're either stoned or fuckin with us"

    LOL

  • I wonder of she makes those dolphin noises when she orgasms?

  • @Animefan300

    God i would so fucking find out

  • Either stoned or fucking with us LOL.

  • He really took alot of drugs didn't he show to this to the Ad council.

  • Maybe that's why the Japanese are killing the Dolphins.

  • Dolphins are recreational killers. Won't somebody please think of the porpoises?

    Also, it's not my bag, but you might also like to know that they are homosexual mutual masturbators.

  • @imperiumdiaboli haha wow

  • @imperiumdiaboli

    >Also, it's not my bag, but you might also like to know that they are homosexual mutual masturbators.

    Well, that just wins them my limitless respect.

  • go swim with dolphins and see how fast one of them tries to fuck you up the ass....it happens all the time! i say we eat the horny little fucks!!!!!

  • Comment removed

  • wow. She just made....a sound.... using her vibrations.....wow.

  • 3:59

    the sound she makes in bed

  • I think Octopus and squids are smarter then dolphins

  • I don't get it. when i first saw Penn and Teller I really liked them. Then after several years, I hated them. well, penn mostly. now I love them.

    BTW, who cares about swimming with dolphins? I'd rather swim with naked women.

  • @uglybob6666 Dude, you have given me a wonderful idea for a tourist resort. Mandalay Bay should replace their dolphin pool with a naked hotties pool, where you can swim with them, pet them, "feed" them...