baby was looking UP to the roof if you are laying on your back!! during labor that is dangerous pain feels only on back traveling to the front......
Baby should have had face looking down towards your back. Baby could not come out.......simply as that. YOU should not squat in water only to the side and on your back squating forward makes baby's head look UP UP to your belly button, not down to your spine that is danger baby and you can die.
bad midwife.....she was supposed to twist baby's head with her hand slowly with each contraction. She did not...when she saw head was not turning she should have called for assistance. Babys lucky to be alife.
The bigger issue was not positioning, it was failure to decend. As the doula, I tried to reccomend positions to the midwives, but they were already stressed from 'failure to progress'. A baby can safely be born in an OP position, it is not a life or death situation.
I forgot to add, if you or the midwife suspects less than optimal fetal positioning (such as back labor which can be a strong indicator of a posterior position) - avoid deep squats as that will help the baby desend in the incorrect position and repositioning the baby later in labor will be very difficult. Not sure how you were positioned in the pool but if you were squatting that likely made the situation worse.
One of my messages got lost - this is actually my husband's account, I don't have a utube account. I am a doula and expecting my second and I really like learning from other mom's birth stories so that I can be better prepared for my own upcoming birth but also so that I can help future clinets etc. Thanks for sharing your story! Congrats on breastfeeding despite the initial struggles at the hospital.
Two really excellent books are Henci Goer's Thinking Women's Guide to Pregnancy and Anne Frye's Holistic Midwifery. Great for doulas and moms to be as well (though Holistic Midwifery is a textbook for midwives but is such a wealth of info with respect to various complications that can arise in labor and how to avoid/remedy these complications - and many can often be remedied if discovered early on just through position changes, rest, communicating with baby, etc.
Someone who is familiar with your birth plan/needs and choices and who can be firm with the hospital staff to make sure they uphold your choices and to make sure no unnecessary interventions/tests are done unless medically necessary (and that these interventions/tests are performed not out of routine but based on sound evidence based research).
I would have asked that my husband always be with the baby to make sure no unnecessary interventions are done (such as giving glucose water to the baby which interferes with breastfeeding) and to make sure that the baby is returned to mom asap. Hospitals do a good job at making sure that the baby's physical needs are met but the emotional/bonding needs are often ignored so you really do need an advocate for both you and the baby at all times!
I also think it is important to always have a backup plan when having a homebirth, having not only a hospital bag packed but also a birth plan is so incredibly important. It would have been good if your husband/doula had been with you at the hospital for longer to help you be firm with your choices. For example, once the baby's breathing was regular, he should have been immediately returned to you if you had so wished.
Other helpful postions would have been the knee-chest position (holding it for longer time up to 45 min is really effective), leaning forward on a birth ball, lunges, stair climbing, crawlign on hands and knees, and doing belly lifts during contractions. All those are great for helping babies who are in posterior positions and/or who have their heads unflexed/chin up.
Also, it would have been a huge clue when she checked you the second time if you were not fully dilated when you already had the urge to push. Had the posterior positioning been detected earlier on (preferably in early labor but up until transition you could have tried several position changes to help the baby into a flexed, OA, or anterior position. For example,the midwife could have used a rebozo (a long cloth that is used to gently rock your belly)
However, it seems that your MW was not too experienced with detecting poor positioning early on and suggesting positions/techniques to prevent stalled/non-progressive labor later on. As I was watching your story, the first thing that alerted me to poor fetal positioning was the combination of your water breaking and the early back labor you had which strongly suggests posterior or brow position. I wonder why your midwife did not detect the posterir positioning when she first checked you?
Firsty, I think your MW was great in knowing when to transfer. Although it was not an emergency, often times by the time the baby is already so far down in your pelvis, short of maneuvers, it is difficult to try to get the baby to turn, which is why it is important to have baby turn early on in labor, preferably before 5cm dilation.
I am really curious if the midwives tried different positions with you to help the baby tuck his chin in? Did they try anything like reezebo or knees to chest or lunges?? I'm really suprised that they wouldn't have urged you to try that 30 min after pushing.
what i want to say is that it worked well for you but for all other mothers i would want them to be a little more alert and dont wait that long after full dilatation ... rest its your choice after all its meant to be natural .....
it took me FOUR hours to push my baby out, and there were no issues ATALL... and because it took so long, it stretched gradually and had no tears... my son's apgar scores were 10/10. I'm sure if I were in a hospital, the doctor would have wanted to cut me... very glad I didn't give birth in hospital with a doctor... to be cut when I didn't even end up tearing would have been really stupid... Doctors are too damn impatient.
I am doing a home birth with a midwife as well. This is my first baby and this is the BEST info. I've heard so far- lots of detailed information. Like you experienced, I've heard that when it's time to push, if you just give into the pain like you did and push, it's not painful. It's when you try to "hold it in" it hurts. Good to know that this is good advice! ^_^
one of my twin baby sisters was born face up and the doctors said that was fine!!
AlliieeAndJajaa 10 months ago
I have had 6 children all faced up so I do not think that that is a problem
watchingyourevilness 11 months ago
Thank you for your story and thanks to some of the comments, which were even more illuminating!
guiltyofmagnificence 2 years ago
I just found these today! Thanks for sharing your story.
doulingmama 2 years ago
baby was looking UP to the roof if you are laying on your back!! during labor that is dangerous pain feels only on back traveling to the front......
Baby should have had face looking down towards your back. Baby could not come out.......simply as that. YOU should not squat in water only to the side and on your back squating forward makes baby's head look UP UP to your belly button, not down to your spine that is danger baby and you can die.
rddbba 2 years ago
bad midwife.....she was supposed to twist baby's head with her hand slowly with each contraction. She did not...when she saw head was not turning she should have called for assistance. Babys lucky to be alife.
rddbba 2 years ago 12
The bigger issue was not positioning, it was failure to decend. As the doula, I tried to reccomend positions to the midwives, but they were already stressed from 'failure to progress'. A baby can safely be born in an OP position, it is not a life or death situation.
doulingmama 2 years ago
I forgot to add, if you or the midwife suspects less than optimal fetal positioning (such as back labor which can be a strong indicator of a posterior position) - avoid deep squats as that will help the baby desend in the incorrect position and repositioning the baby later in labor will be very difficult. Not sure how you were positioned in the pool but if you were squatting that likely made the situation worse.
bleutyler 2 years ago
One of my messages got lost - this is actually my husband's account, I don't have a utube account. I am a doula and expecting my second and I really like learning from other mom's birth stories so that I can be better prepared for my own upcoming birth but also so that I can help future clinets etc. Thanks for sharing your story! Congrats on breastfeeding despite the initial struggles at the hospital.
bleutyler 2 years ago
Two really excellent books are Henci Goer's Thinking Women's Guide to Pregnancy and Anne Frye's Holistic Midwifery. Great for doulas and moms to be as well (though Holistic Midwifery is a textbook for midwives but is such a wealth of info with respect to various complications that can arise in labor and how to avoid/remedy these complications - and many can often be remedied if discovered early on just through position changes, rest, communicating with baby, etc.
bleutyler 2 years ago
Someone who is familiar with your birth plan/needs and choices and who can be firm with the hospital staff to make sure they uphold your choices and to make sure no unnecessary interventions/tests are done unless medically necessary (and that these interventions/tests are performed not out of routine but based on sound evidence based research).
bleutyler 2 years ago
I would have asked that my husband always be with the baby to make sure no unnecessary interventions are done (such as giving glucose water to the baby which interferes with breastfeeding) and to make sure that the baby is returned to mom asap. Hospitals do a good job at making sure that the baby's physical needs are met but the emotional/bonding needs are often ignored so you really do need an advocate for both you and the baby at all times!
bleutyler 2 years ago
I also think it is important to always have a backup plan when having a homebirth, having not only a hospital bag packed but also a birth plan is so incredibly important. It would have been good if your husband/doula had been with you at the hospital for longer to help you be firm with your choices. For example, once the baby's breathing was regular, he should have been immediately returned to you if you had so wished.
bleutyler 2 years ago
Other helpful postions would have been the knee-chest position (holding it for longer time up to 45 min is really effective), leaning forward on a birth ball, lunges, stair climbing, crawlign on hands and knees, and doing belly lifts during contractions. All those are great for helping babies who are in posterior positions and/or who have their heads unflexed/chin up.
bleutyler 2 years ago
Also, it would have been a huge clue when she checked you the second time if you were not fully dilated when you already had the urge to push. Had the posterior positioning been detected earlier on (preferably in early labor but up until transition you could have tried several position changes to help the baby into a flexed, OA, or anterior position. For example,the midwife could have used a rebozo (a long cloth that is used to gently rock your belly)
bleutyler 2 years ago
However, it seems that your MW was not too experienced with detecting poor positioning early on and suggesting positions/techniques to prevent stalled/non-progressive labor later on. As I was watching your story, the first thing that alerted me to poor fetal positioning was the combination of your water breaking and the early back labor you had which strongly suggests posterior or brow position. I wonder why your midwife did not detect the posterir positioning when she first checked you?
bleutyler 2 years ago
Firsty, I think your MW was great in knowing when to transfer. Although it was not an emergency, often times by the time the baby is already so far down in your pelvis, short of maneuvers, it is difficult to try to get the baby to turn, which is why it is important to have baby turn early on in labor, preferably before 5cm dilation.
bleutyler 2 years ago
I am really curious if the midwives tried different positions with you to help the baby tuck his chin in? Did they try anything like reezebo or knees to chest or lunges?? I'm really suprised that they wouldn't have urged you to try that 30 min after pushing.
bleutyler 2 years ago
what i want to say is that it worked well for you but for all other mothers i would want them to be a little more alert and dont wait that long after full dilatation ... rest its your choice after all its meant to be natural .....
crescendoclub 2 years ago
Comment removed
crescendoclub 2 years ago
it took me FOUR hours to push my baby out, and there were no issues ATALL... and because it took so long, it stretched gradually and had no tears... my son's apgar scores were 10/10. I'm sure if I were in a hospital, the doctor would have wanted to cut me... very glad I didn't give birth in hospital with a doctor... to be cut when I didn't even end up tearing would have been really stupid... Doctors are too damn impatient.
xpoeticxtragedyx 2 years ago 2
took me 2 hrs pushing with my first and the same 2 hours with my daughter.
edaj84 2 years ago
Comment removed
crescendoclub 2 years ago
she should have got in the water whenever the bloody hell she wanted!!!
edaj84 2 years ago
I am doing a home birth with a midwife as well. This is my first baby and this is the BEST info. I've heard so far- lots of detailed information. Like you experienced, I've heard that when it's time to push, if you just give into the pain like you did and push, it's not painful. It's when you try to "hold it in" it hurts. Good to know that this is good advice! ^_^
hcmontessori 2 years ago
thanks for your story
AJBWW 2 years ago
amazing story
fijianqueen23 2 years ago 5