Aperture Investment Opportunity #3: "Turrets"

[minako1984]

As of 3/1/2012 it would appear that 82 people got too close to the baby 'o'

[RavenRose213]

0:34 I'm different... X3

[ZBlayde]

So, they fire "the whole bullet" without any spiralling? Geez, no wonder those things are so inaccurate.

[serialkillerwhale]

"thats NAWT ENUFF DAKKA"

in the words of a ork

[Baconintendobros]

This is the same technology we used on robots. Scares the hell outta them.

[0HellVanguard0]

0:37 turret shaped in the pattern of the Empire of the Rising Sun flag ?

[ZeroGearPlus]

0:36 "What idiot picked-"

[gameman127]

L.O.L there is no baby in that bed! O_O

[PhantomFluttershy]

I want the yellow one.

[LFPORT]

MOM... PLEASE!!!!!!! *------------------*

[E1craZ4life]

I think the flashes are the bullets scraping against the inside of the gun's barrel.

[Caboose039]

Sup dawg, we heard you like bullets, so we put 65% more bullet in yo bullet so you can shoot while yo shoot.

[HoneyCrystal0]

65 percent more bullet per bullet? BULLETCEPTION!

[FoxCuriousity]

82 people picked the "What idiot picked these colors?!" color.

[masigouin]

I think I would be more scared for the baby than for anyone else

[thefastesrcman]

If you stop at around 0:36 right at the start of the flash, you an see a man's face, with a math equation or something in front of the screen.

[merlick123]

@thefastesrcman And ascii text that reads:

"Here's Da Beens, Dougtato:

You found many. Find the rest.

MiKaXsUs FTW"

[SterlingGragg]

@thefastesrcman The man is Cave, but the numbers are weird.

[AydenMize]

Y U NO PUT COLORED TURRETS IN GAME!!!

[Shisanba]

0:36

Cave Johnson:"What idiot picked you"

Me: "The same idiot who put the pink turret backwards." :P

[IONstudiosroblox]

Its so Funny! XD

[ben10iklmmi]

I bought one of them. It's detective! Give my money back!

[DawnsAvarice]

@ben10iklmmi it's a detective? you shuold pay extra if it solves crimes

[Sanders1521]

0:46 Honey have you seen the cat anywhere?

Target Aquired

[SteamBirds]

Dear Santa...

[illusion756]

baby starts crying

mom: oh dear guess he's hungry *forgetting the turret she opens the door and is promptly shot into oblivion*

dad: . . . . well at least the baby's safe ^_^;

[maychanx31]

Let's see... The idiot who put GLaDOS into a Potato, tried to kill Chell, and ended up wrecking Aperture. Oh and the idiot who forgot that Chell can't speak!

[StraightFlame1]

@maychanx31 If you're talking about Wheatley, he was meant to be dumb (Intelligence dampening core). Also, at one point in the game it's proven that he's dumber than a turret.

[neoo9999]

YEAH! Finally. Just remembered where I heard this: "So you can protect the things that matter most". Seraph says it before Neo comes to the Oracle in Matrix Reloaded.

[Notatrollsrry]

if they spring fire the bullets why is there a flash?

[btwrug2]

dear santa!!!

[MrMickio1]

heavy say no one can out smart bullet FAAAKE cave johnson shoot 65% more pullet per bullet

[TehhCake]

The "Desert" cased turret says the Oracle Turret's line. When found in Portal 2, it has no case. DUNDUNDUN?

[AydenMize]

82 People tried to get to the baby.

[SuperAwesomeness42]

The red section of the like bar is exactly 1 pixel wide.

[MrAshton0417]

THE BABY IS A LIE

[ThatOneGuy33333]

There should've been old-timey vintage turrets in Chpater 6-7. That would've been SHWEET.

[Starcraft2playa]

Anyone else here the sentry say "im different"

[Notatrollsrry]

@Starcraft2playa no, but i did hear that sentry say i'm different.

[woofa97]

"Try getting close to that baby. Hah! Your funeral."

Climb in through the window behind the turret. Push it over.

Who's having the funeral now?

[Umbecka]

If you copy the numbers on 0:38 to an ASCII translator it reads Here's Da Beens, Dougto:You found many.Find the the rest.MiKaXs FTW and Also... superdinoman's mom what could that even mean

[mccartney2011]

0:37 "What idiot picked this?!?" *backwards turret*

[Imepicerthenyou]

Dear Easter Bunny...

[BetaJackMaxis]

I had trouble breathing.

[michelle103able]

sorry at the end i meant to

[michelle103able]

roses are red,

violets are blue

turrets are poo

panels are yo

[THEMONKEYSLAPPER2]

they sell combustible lemon plush on valves website now you should check it out

[Tsnuamiman]

The next turret will shoot combustible lemons!!! I DON'T WANT YOUR DAMN LEMONS!!!!

[caelum1999]

lol the purple turret to the far right at 0:37 is bakwards! hah!

[mccartney2011]

@caelum1999 Lol

[caelum1999]

if they fire the whole bullet by a series of gears then why is there muzzle flashes if they dont set off the gun powder?

[GhostLink92]

@caelum1999 Because SCIENCE!

[hauk93]

Did anyone else notice that the last turret design was taken from Super Robot Monkey Team Hyper Force Go? What on earth made them reference that?!

[LemonatedOrange]

Fire the whole bullet? Then why is there a bang sound and muzzle flash?

[01Blank10]

would be damn useful when the combine came

[rainbowunicorn890]

the jungle one was like "I'm different!"

[D0OMZDAYZ]

SHUT UP AND TAKE MY MONEY

[Dagmakter]

82 people failed to touch the baby.

[pwnzor670]

I'll buy one!

[Laconai]

Cave Johnson is one of the best Video game characters ever :D!!!! Love him and his lemons!

[Dean11link]

now i have blue prints for the turrets

[MyThisisaname]

thats 65% more bullet

[lundwed]

press 6

[zoganauiti]

82 people are Chell's fakes

[winnerkid1]

13,900 people bought a turret

[DarkCreeper911]

82 people tryed to get to that baby

[SomeOtherGuy91]

It's so simple, but so hilarious!

[EvilBearClaw]

did anyone else know that this is #3 i thought valve cant count to 3

[ENTERtheCREATOR]

htt p://wamj elly.co m/? ref=259 278 for some free stuff

[Kat90001]

Desert turrent.... is the oracle turrnet ?

[BladeTheHedgehog0]

Valve why you no tell us where you get your ideas (ノಠ益ಠ)ノ彡┻━┻

[breakabreaker]

that pink one is backwards 0:37

[Xboxlover806]

Silly turrents! Theres no such thing as 3! Your from Valve!

[TheTSense]

where the fuck is the dislike bar?

do you see ANY red there!?

[Lichwing]

FAKE AND GAY! VALVE CANT COUNT TO 3!

[theguyinblue2]

@Lichwing They count to 3 all the time. They just do it in an accent far beyond our range of hearing.

[E1craZ4life]

@theguyinblue2 Look, metal-ball, I can hear you.

[theguyinblue2]

@E1craZ4life Oh, so you want to start a reference war? I'm not just quite brilliant, I'm also quite strong. Biggest muscle in my body, my brain! Second biggest, my muscles!

[E1craZ4life]

@theguyinblue2 I was talking to Valve.

[theguyinblue2]

@E1craZ4life Ah. I see.

[a0001521]

bulletception

[pandazatthedisco]

Pedo Bear: "Challenge Accepted"

[rekzzak]

0:34 im different...

[Barchivock]

Good night.

[Metropl3x]

i would protect my loved ones with a turrent

[Bonovasitch]

"I'm different!"

[GeorgianHalfLifeFan]

Aperture Investment Opportunity #3: "Tu....

Waaaait, #3 ?!

[thedma100]

@GeorgianHalfLifeFan EVERYONE Knows Valve Cant Count To 3

[ISUBSISTONSOULS]

Goodnight *PzYcho Smilez*

[pokefan3333]

What baby should I try to get close to?It's not there...

[tehpwnzorofhalo]

Just try to get close to that dislike button.HAH! Your funeral.

[isprel221]

@tehpwnzorofhalo 81 People managed to click it, but right after that, they died.

[cumbustable1]

@tehpwnzorofhalo the last thing you'll hear is a cute automated "goodbye"

[OldSerpentOfSin]

@tehpwnzorofhalo 82 people are 6ft under now.

[Spenc05]

If you pause the video at the part when static comes u might get lucky and see cave Johnson

[Burnout609]

Heh, your funeral ! xD

[MammuttiZ]

Desert turret is diffrent!

[DJC11757]

This man could sell anything!

[ColePlaysWii]

just try to get next to that baby hah hah. your funeral LOL

[vladnuke]

Lol, they are basically airsoft guns! Look at the inside of them, they have the same gearbox and everything!

[hakesz]

good night xxD

[fmstatic1590]

we got forest, desert, evening at the improv, (what idiot picked these?) hilarious

[Manlife111]

Aww there cute I want 1 so show everyone at mah school then killem

[MyMonkeyBitch]

Dear Santa...

[GeorgianHalfLifeFan]

If Valve don't release next Half-Life game by the end of the year,they are gonna need A LOT of these things...

[thatoneweirdo1]

I'm different...

[NeptunII]

did anyone ever read those describtions of the turrets inside?

Empathy generator, and right next to it an empathy suppressor.

well, why not. That's what science is all about anyway.

[Superdude1298]

Let Caroline be his running mate! Or Chell.

[DopeGum]

0:20 what's the point of a Empathy Generator is 1 inch from that there's an Empathy Suppressor? xD

[956137142]

Wait, 0:20, Upper left, "Personality core", So that means turrets do have fealings!

[956137142]

Thumbs up If you paused to read the confidential thing at 0:17.

[zephspacer]

just try get close to that baby! lmao!!

[Clayonic]

Your Funeral?!

[Superdude1298]

Cave for president!

[XomproductionsX]

@Superdude1298 if only........

[TheNicoraniChannel]

My money is going into these desert turrets, they are different.

[EMAXV2]

0:43 transcribe audio:

"several straight to your door step" XD

[theXylinder]

"That's 60% more buller per bullet" xD

[Thundercloudprtl]

Lazers are red

Atlas is blue

Valve finally typed 3

I just did too.

[nachopickles]

0:37

[inteli722]

can i have a turret in the "what idiot picked these" color?

[PandaHero24]

Dear Valve,

Please make a portal 3

To prove that you CAN count to 3...

[wildfire28382]

i'll take 5! :D

[TheRantingCabbie]

"Clickity click click, right on the money." "Uuuuhm, BLAM......BLAM BLAM BLAM, see, I'm not defective."

[Tannerizsinging]

i want a turret....

[ProductionsOfPauls]

pause at the static thingy at about 0:37 and theres a picture of cave jonhson with alot of different numbers O_O

[wtfyman]

@ProductionsOfPauls after abt 100 attempts i managed to pause it! ur right! hes smiling!

[GateKeeper525]

@ProductionsOfPauls like if you spent half an hour trying to get to that shot at 0:37

[WoWkemon90]

@GateKeeper525 Got it in two minutes.

[CrazyFaceEInc]

@ProductionsOfPauls 65 108 115 111 46 46 46 32 115 117 112 101 114 100 105 110 111 109 97 110 39 115 32 109 11 190

[CrazyFaceEInc]

@CrazyFaceEInc ___ = alpha x 163

"___" x 13

[tomcatmwi]

@ProductionsOfPauls These numbers are ASCII codes, and the message is:

Here's Da Beens, Dougtato:

You found many. Find the rest.

MiKaXsUs FTW

Which seems to be a little cryptic, but probably referring to developers' nicknames. Dougtato and Mikaxsus are used as a usernames on several Valve-related sites and Steam.

[epicwinface]

@ProductionsOfPauls self absorbed much. eh?

[TheDday10]

Sentry gun better XD

[jamalaron]

Maybe I shouldent have invested in black messa....

[XDragonCryX]

80 people didnt get their Aperture Science Sentry Turret.....

[rutger362]

i love how theone says "i'm different"

[InnerVision115]

Where was the Animal King?!?!?!?

[Ferndapple1024]

Can I get one? o3o

[theTWmovie]

I want the forrest plz to GET MY NEIGHTBURS 2 BE QUIET

[pokemario20]

lol 0:34 the desert turret

"i'm different >.<"

[leon8827]

Hey, the pink turret at 0:37 is looking back while everyone is looking forward!!

Thumbs up if you saw or see it!!

[loltube100]

I wold like one with the "what idiot picked these designe"

[AwayToSlay]

3 : O

[RumblezMan]

Pause CLOSELY at 0:38

[131bh]

@RumblezMan. What's it supposed to do?

[WartrioBob]

Ghostrobo asked for this!

[carsandcats34]

i actually want one.

[IAmaAPerson]

Pedobear: Challenge accepted.

[ScottJackson117]

As long as they come in lemon.

[runswithlolwolves]

Desert Turrents different ^w^

[NerfOfficerAlyx]

Cave Johnson: Just try to get near that baby -laughs- I'm serious bring me a test subject

[iGmoders]

portal turret = mac!

[Dude42449]

TF2 turret would be a better one

[MarioishBeast]

ESRB says this game has Fantasy Violance.

SCIENCE IS NOT A FANTASY

[Henpups]

I got a mini turret for Xmas!

[Nascarfan090]

0:36

What idiot would bu-

I lol'd

[NemesisPyro]

Just try to get close to that baby. Your funeral.

[Revo642]

0:46 where the f is the baby?

[QuatreFun]

thumbs up if you remember the ARG

[VelosiT]

80 people tried to get close to that baby.

[1JCAJ1]

They should hire the Engineer to upgrade it.

[ChrisCompany1029]

anyone notice the backwards turret?

[ThePlatoon4]

valve counted to 3? TIME PARADOX UNIVERSE DOES NOT COMPUTE

ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR EROOR ERROR

[epicdude61388]

the desert turret is different!

[yoodledoodle14]

It costs Valve $400,000 to attempt to type "3" for 12 seconds.

[johnny121152]

I want one to protect myself from my neighbor dinkleberg

[MegaYoshiBros]

GUYS #1 #2 #3...

VALVE HAS COUNTED TO 3!!!

[thenicholas2601]

@MegaYoshiBros ITS A MIRACLE!!!!!