A Small Slice of Life -- Spousal Disapproval

[Tiwaking]

Even though I live in a completely different country almost half a world away and three years into the future: That disapproving look shamed me into submission.

Simply amazing :D

[EvenGodsSuffer]

One of the things I miss about entering a Catholic church is the aroma of bee's wax candles. It seems they are battery powered nowadays.

[ProfMTH]

@EvenGodsSuffer In some churches, yes. In fact, in the parish in which I grew up, there were only electric candles going back as far as I can remember.

[EvenGodsSuffer]

@ProfMTH

My church-going days were pre-Vatican II.

[FarAwayTheBest]

Are you two married?

How nice to see two people loving each other despite their disagree about religious truths

I didn't get it though, what was the disapproval about?

[ProfMTH]

@FarAwayTheBest Thanks. Since I don't believe in any god, he didn't think I should be lighting the candle.

[geminirat84]

Beautiful video, it made me smile this morning ^_^.

[ProfMTH]

@geminirat84 Thanks. :-)

[thisisaguy]

I rarely rate videos. When I do rate them it's either five stars or only one. It usually takes something extra to remind me that I can rate a video. Sometimes that something is exceedingly bad thus getting a one star but others are on the other end of the spectrum. This is one of those, especially the last thirty seconds or so.

[martinorozco]

I had one of those looks yesterday from my wife. I comment to her about your video, was funny

[martinorozco]

congratulations, you find someone that make you happy. it is wonderful.

[ProfMTH]

It is indeed. Thanks.

[shade421]

oh yeah i know that look well!!!!

[ProfMTH]

lol  It seems to be universal.

[burnhippiesforfuel]

funny that it's clear even through sunglasses.

[johnnyk2112]

"splendored"{sorry}

[Deadman3913]

I've only been dating my girlfriend for just over a year. I joke a lot with(at) her. Not only do I know 'the look', but I can feel it before I see it. What is that? It can't just be a woman thing; two of my homosexual friends report similar things from their partners. Creepy.

[ProfMTH]

Yeah, it seems to be a universal phenomenon. Like you, I can even feel the look when it's coming but hasn't quite appeared yet.

[laprofessorapai]

LOL  Luckily my husband is an atheist like me, but there are times I give him "the look" Guess it's just a gift lol.

[ProfMTH]

LOL! Indeed it is ... the gift that keeps giving. ;-)

[GeneticistAtheist]

Why did he disapprove of you lighting a candle? I share in my girlfriend's religion Roman Catholicism to the point of even going to church and singing with her, though I am atheist, and at times antitheist. We don't have to agree on every point to enjoy those activities together do we?

[ProfMTH]

He felt I shouldn't be doing it if I didn't attribute the same supernatural significance to it that he did. He got over it very quickly. The face and attitude he threw me were just too funny to resist having a laugh over.

[GeneticistAtheist]

Ah. Well anyway, you two look very happy. That

and it looked like a very fun trip. Thanks for sharing. See ya later.

[ProfMTH]

You're welcome. And thank YOU for checking the video out. We are very happy. 12 years together yesterday.

[GeneticistAtheist]

Congratulations!

[pypermarru1]

Oh ProfMTH, I just love this video. I have gotten and given that look before, thankfully I did not catch it on film for time in memoriam...ha. I would buy him a cup of coffee as well :) but I would only high-five you...ha. I hate to gush, but I just love you more each video I watch.

[ProfMTH]

Oh, thank you, Pypermarru1. It's so nice of you to say. Initially, my partner wasn't too thrilled that I'd captured his look on camera. But he's since watched the video a few times and laughs about it -- though he still doesn't think my "Harbor Queen" joke was funny. ;-)

[templarart]

I could not be married to a religious theist. No frikkin way!

[ProfMTH]

Well, we were theists when we met. He's not really religious, though. He hasn't been to church since I stopped dragging us there before my transition to atheism.

[templarart]

That's why I qualified it as "religious". I can see being with a non-religious theist. Luckily my wife is maybe a bit more militantly atheist than I am - oh and HOT (RARE) :)

[ProfMTH]

LOL. Well, good for you on both counts.

[CadicusTheDamned]

I think it would be really hard to be married (er, partnered, sorry for the hetero bias) to a theist.

Then again, my wife believes in ghosts and has a strong sympathy for her mother's religion, Shintoism.

We have a shrine to dead ancestors and everything. We give them offerings like beer an cigarettes.

I guess you just have to tolerate the idiosyncrasies of people you love.

After all, she mostly doesn't mind me being the world's biggest asshole.

[ProfMTH]

LOL! I've never heard of beer and cigarettes as ancestor offerings. Wow. Well, when my partner and I met, we were both theists. In fact, we went to Mass together on our second date. ;-) He's had to do most of the adjusting since I transitioned to atheism.

[CadicusTheDamned]

Just out of curiosity, what do you teach?

Theology or comparative religion, perhaps? You seem pretty knowledgeable.

[ProfMTH]

I teach Constitutional Law, Argumentation, Debate, Criminal Law, and that sort of thing. The religion stuff I learned on my own time -- all those years as a theist.

[CadicusTheDamned]

Ah, that's why you're so slick. All that high falutin' lawyerin'.

*lulz*

[ProfMTH]

LOL. That's what my mother used to say. ;-)

[randyhelzerman]

Great Vid Prof  :-) May God and Sagan bless yo both!

[ProfMTH]

lol Well, thank you very much, Randy.

[daniephillips77]

Totally get what your saying and your are so right.

[ProfMTH]

Thanks.

[tenneral]

You do realise how extremely lucky you are to have a loving companion? Long life!

[ProfMTH]

I *do* realize that. I couldn't be more grateful for him. It's been almost 12 years.

[Tacos25n28]

we disagree a lot but we also joke with each other a lot... We find this love hate joke relationship as the best. Good to see you 2 have a good relationship too.

[ProfMTH]

Thanks. Yep, almost 12 years together. And usually each of us finds those moments of frustration with one another to be funny in retrospect. That's a good thing, I think. In any case, thanks. I'm glad you have a solid relationship, too.

[Brainmold]

The look is universal.

[ProfMTH]

Yep. Proving yet again what is often true: the closer to the individual level one speaks, the more universal one ends up being. Someone once said that and put it far better than I just did.

[WeiSein]

Lol, nice comeback at the end of this video. Probably saved you a few days sleeping on the couch :P

[ProfMTH]

I'm no dummy.  lol

[WhoWants2Live4Ever]

Ah you can tell he doesn't mean it too harshly. :D I love it when people allow others to see some of their personal life. Man, I'll never forget when I found out that Brett Keane had legs! lol

[ProfMTH]

LOL! You just may have given me an idea for my next video. ;-)

[iconoclastic23]

You put so much artistry into your videos that it's hard not to be touched by them. But I must confess, I'm a little confused as to the source of your partner's ire for lighting the candle. Is he saying you're a hypocrite for being an atheist and partaking of a catholic ritual? You might remind him that atheists aren't necessarily strangers to the numinous.

[ProfMTH]

Well, he got over it fairly quickly. (I wouldn't have made this video joking about that moment if he hadn't.) In any case, I think "the look" emerged more from a sense of frustration that the act of lighting the candle didn't mean quite the same thing to me as it did to him, if that makes sense. He wishes I were a believer.

[iconoclastic23]

I must confess, no disrespect intended to your partner, but it seems to me that it requires a kind of Stockholm Syndrome for a gay man or woman to show piety to the Christian deity. Even putting some of the more vile passages of the bible aside, many within the religion seem to use gays as a great enemy to rally the faithful against.

[ProfMTH]

I totally understand what you're saying. The fact is that for most of our life together, we were both theists and members of a progressive church community -- a Catholic parish, you might be surprised to learn -- that fully welcomed homosexuals (single and couples).

[whistlinphil]

Prof,

It is awesome how love overcomes disapproval; I know my wife gives me a lot of harsh looks...

~Phil

[ProfMTH]

I think "the look" is one of the most frequently used and highly effective means of nonverbal communication between spouses and partners.

[Veritas48]

Prof..your partner...when you freeze the camera at the moment of disapproval...he looks like a spitting image of Rowin Atkinson. The guy that plays the role of Mr. Bean you know? So classic. I noticed that right away.

[ProfMTH]

Ya think? I don't see it. Oy. He won't like that. I might have to pull this video. lol

[k9lionheart]

lol, I'm surprised he didn't punch you in the face after you lit that candle. very nice vid.

[ProfMTH]

Thanks. I'm glad he opted for "the look" instead. :-)

[JerbyVids]

That rocks! :)

[ProfMTH]

;-)

[Celtickender]

Great video, I can't quite figure out who gives more of those looks in my relationship... lol

[ProfMTH]

lol  Yeah, we all give them, don't we? They have to be one of the more effective methods of non-verbal communication.

[dfarmer1584]

very touching.

[ProfMTH]

Ah, shucks.