What are Words For?

[misseptember]

INTEGRITTYYYYYYY

[BillyOhRayBob90210]

I think this is one of your best videos, Steve. Well, I find it particularly relevant for myself. I was just thinking the other day that one of the greatest truths I've ever heard is the phrase, "Talk is cheap." I am also at a point in my life where I almost completely ignore other people's words, especially if they are talking about something that they say they are going to do in the future. If people tell me they are going to do something, I almost automatically ignore them now.

[vagabondsteve]

"Talk is Cheap" was going to be the original title of this video. I ignore people's words unless they have a history of reliability. Then I will trust them until they prove me otherwise. Keeping one's word comes from good parenting.

[BillyOhRayBob90210]

@vagabondsteve: You wrote: "Keeping one's word comes from good parenting." HAHA! I totally agree. One of the reasons I made the comment I did is because I was dealing with this one girl who would always "promise" me that she was going to do things, and I started to see that she never followed through. As I got to know her better, I found out her parents divorced when she was only a year old and she said she "hated her dad." I saw that as a big "red flag" and got the hell out of dodge! HAHA!

[gretchen4321]

hi steve, yes, words can be clues. non verbal "cues" are the facial expressions, gestures, tone, body posturing, ... . like if you were in a room and there was a fire drill, and noone was panicing (b/c they knew it was a drill), you wouldn't be inclined to panic. you would go off of the n/v cues of the room. these types of non-verbal communications have influence over the actual words that one states. as time goes by, i wonder if most our use of language is superfluous.

[vagabondsteve]

Language is golden. It has only become superfluous because it has lost value through lies, false flattery, unreliability, etc. Like fool's gold we have devalued the currency of language because we don't "mean what we say & say what we mean".

[andriante]

But aren't you doing the opposite of what Tolle teaches?

I mean obviously it is a harsh world if you live in fear of death and form.

Yet if you live knowing that you are just a manifestation of the unmanifested and your purpose is to help the universe to become aware of it self you realize you don't "need" the world and you don't need it to be different than it is and that's when the true transformation will begin for you and the entire human race.

What do you feel about this

[vagabondsteve]

I don't always agree with Tolle. There are spiritual cliches like "manifestation of the unmanifested" which make no practical sense to me. What does it also mean to not "need" the world. If Tolle doesn't need the world to be different than it is why does he write books, give seminars, and appear on Oprah. His book "A New Earth" is promoting a new way of being. If he didn't want the world to change he would just sit in a cave.

[andriante]

Not needing the world means you are free from form, thus are able to release your fears about gain and loss.

Meaning you can enjoy life's many many pleasures to the maximum and you can strive for them, but it also means that you don't live in fear of losing them or not getting them.

And when death finally approaches, you do not fear it. It will be like going home.

You still want the world to become a better place, but ULTIMATELY you don't need it because it's fleeting and impermanent.

[vagabondsteve]

Well said, thank you.

[gretchen4321]

non verbal language is powerful, and the cues we give can be more accurate than the actual wordage "it's not what you say, but how you say it".. haven't there been scientific studies on how our thoughts and the language used to describe those thoughts are not congruous and that words can hinder our mind's experience? utube is helpful in that you have to economize by keeping it under 10:00 :).

[vagabondsteve]

Good point. Non verbal cues are often more powerful than what people say.

[faszika]

aren't words like obsolete? i had many clashes even with my mother about this ppl get uncomfortable without the constant yakking

[vagabondsteve]

Obsolete no... overused YES. It's a joy to sit in silence with someone you love.

[HaleyMary]

i agree with what you said about trust. Trust takes a lot of time to build even in close friendships. Anyway, great video.

[HaleyMary]

Great video. I think it's true that not many people do mean what they say. And, I think it makes it harder for people who do say what they mean because maybe others around them might not understand them right away. I think you make a great point about non conformity. If people are individuals and don't conform to society in regards to things like religious beliefs for example, but are still spiritual in their own way, may find it hard to find a group of friends in life.

[vagabondsteve]

Thanks HaleyMary for your support & contributions to the discussion.

[CountDOODOO]

Another excellent video!

I agree tho, I wish more people were more open and honest. If they were, people could work out many of the issues they face and perhaps even keep their friendship/relationship intact.

[Jangaboo]

hi,

i've tried to speak truthfully to others and I don't think people like it because it puts emphasis on self and when I'm around people the discussion is usually about something outside of ourselves, tv show, basketball team or playoffs, gossip on something, or someone elses life

once the discussion comes to us, i think it puts pressure to look at ourselves and I know i avoid wanting to see myself truthfully

i don't want to see myself truthfully because i might see something i don't like

[vagabondsteve]

Very true. The unexamined life is not worth living. It's best to find people who want to grow through self awareness. They are few and far between but they do exist.

[MammaNole]

It's true that we must beware. We're on the path, but that doesn't mean we need to become push overs. I don't know if I agree totally with you about trust, however. Walter Anderson said: "We're never so vulnerable than when we trust someone -- but paradoxically, if we cannot trust, neither can we find love or joy." We should at least be working towards trust, and I wonder if we'd be losing something if we always felt we couldn't trust new people? How about trusting until given reason not to?

[vagabondsteve]

I think it's best to use your intuition when deciding to trust someone. There are people I meet and right away I sense they are untrustworthy. Trusting someone takes time. I feel trust is earned through right action.

[MammaNole]

My experience tells me you are right! :) I guess I'm just afraid to miss something?

[Luv4Learning]

You are preaching to the choir on this. I expect that others will reciprocate my compassion and genuine love, but they seldom do these days. I have close friends who might, but not the general public. I am having a hard time accepting this reality.

I love your's, and others, videos who share their experiences and thoughts because it keeps me sane in a world that seems heartless at times.

This one is going up on my profile viewer :) 5 stars!

[vagabondsteve]

Thanks for commenting and sharing the videos.

[dollarsandsense7]

This shit is VERY true.

[xShane1122x]

At 5:50 I agree with what your mother said. I have always felt that to be true, and more often people will express their true feelings through a joke and lie to you in a serious tone.

[eb352mm]

you must be middle class or rich to have a such a luxurious lifestyle, transportation is not cheap

[Jangaboo]

replyy to eb32mm,

depends

Bus Route, Biking, walking, catching ride with someone

i'm in Canada and its nearing Winter so I can't bike to work but there's still taking the bus which is about $30 a month for a pass and cheaper if you're a student/senior

I also got a vehicle but its like $60 a month, 6 cylinder car and i barely drive that much :( - thinking of maybe trying to get more fuel efficient car soon

and i'm not rich, i'm a part time janitor, i don't spend like crazy