Would you like a cup of cocoa Jeremy Clarkson? - QI - BBC One

[TheRoversfan]

To all the people who thinks clarkson is an idiot, I urge you firstly to see his documetaries if you havent, and then reflect on the fact that he has created one of the most, if not the most, popular shows in the world. Is that the work of an idiot?

[zivkovicable]

@TheRoversfan So what. Justin fucking Bieber is popular. I urge you to see some of Werner Herzog's documentaries if you haven't, and then reflect what an utter moron Clarkson is in comparison.

[TheRoversfan]

@zivkovicable Calm down Amigo, no need to get angry, this Herzog chap off yours might be a most brilliant person, but that doesnt change the fact that I belive clarkson is a very interesting and inteligent man. I know that he can seem like a bliddering idiot, but in all the cases it is so obviousley intentional (:

[twinbeasants]

John Barry wrote Goldfinger.

[Oldpeacefulwarrior]

What a line up, if you don`t find Steven fry and Co funny, it`s because your probably dead..Two of the best shows ever Top, Gear & Qi... Hilarious..!

[zoidberg2504]

Clarkson is a lot more intelligent than he often pretends. He knows that people hate him but he continues to drive them crazy by saying outrageous things which he knows will get people riled up. Every time he has a book coming out or something to promote you can be sure he'll cause some controversy and you can also be sure that a good chunk of the public will be horrified, which will of course get him front page publicity. Yet somehow people still take him seriously!

[SanitiseYourMind]

@zoidberg2504 Jeremy Clarkson is a fucking genius.

[cgpilk]

I thought he meant the film too :(



[urprivacypolicysucks]

Jeremy Clarkson = Cock

[jawharp1992]

@urprivacypolicysucks James May = "Oh Cock"

[molewizard]

@IronRooRoo And the award for completely not getting the joke goes to...

[IronRooRoo]

@molewizard I wasn't talking about the context of this video. I was referring to Clarkson's other ventures.

And the award for most redundant comment goes to...some dumb cunt I just replied to.

[DanielBoa]

I honestly look forward to the day Clarkson drops dead.

[OlirockCP]

@kalvaza Stephen Fry isn't meant to be particularly funny. He's the clever one. Just listen to Davies and 'Clarksonius'. Although Clarkson is technically a journalist...

[historyisanichtmare]

The Goldfinger song didn't win the Oscar, wasn't even nominated. The film won Best Sound Editing in '64, with "Chim Chim Cher-ee" from Mary Poppins winning Best Song. Newley did win a Grammy in '63 for a different song, "What Kind of Fool Am I?", a year after "Moon River" won a Grammy. Jeremy was right to be confused methinks.

[phatcockproductions]

@historyisanichtmare ohhh the irony......history-is-an-nicht­mare and here you are qouting it

[yaying404]

what show is that? ^^

[TheJoemoze]

@yaying404 QI 

[HughEntwistleMagic]

@yaying404 well uhh it says in the title.... u know - QI

[VladBlok28]

If there was a show with Fry, Laurie, Clarkson, Hammond and May, that would be all the british celebrities I know compiled into one show. Of course the Monty Python crew would have to be the guests

[Clydieooo]

@VladBlok28

Sorry but that'd be awful!

[VladBlok28]

@Clydieooo It would be the representation of how I perceive Great Britain!

[HKOverlord117]

Mmm...QI and a cup of steaming Cadbury drinking chocolate. Perfection.

[richieblackhearted]

@HKOverlord117 No Viscount biscuits? Are you mad?

[HKOverlord117]

@richieblackhearted Not my cup of tea, I'm afraid. Or should I say cocoa? I don't like distractions with hot chocolate.

[anonUK]

watch?v=mAhua9HWmwk

[TheOperaPhanatic]

So with Jeremy on that one. so thought they were talking about the film lol!!!!

[nomadicification]

haha the cup of cocoa line is said in the same voice as in the cup of heroin cocoa sketch from a bit of Fry and Laurie.

[brennanyoung]

Stephen Fry doing an Anthony Newley impression. Very nice. Oh, it doesn't surprise me one bit that Clarkson has never heard of Anthony Newley. He is as ignorant as f***

Politically incorrect is one thing. Ignorance is quite another.

[hathi444]

@brennanyoung Hear hear! I'm an ignorant as fuck American and I bloody well know who Anthony Newley was! Of course, I was a musical performer for many years so do have an ever so slight advantage. :-)

[ClarinoI]

Jeremy Clarkson is a legend! I have to admit, the first time I saw this I made the same mistake he did about the "he wrote Goldfinger" comment.

[ProtestantsRUs]

Stephen Fry is a national asset, Jeremy Clarkson a national embarrassment.

[imonpainkillers]

@ProtestantsRUs I think he's great. and I'm not from England. Altho I do enjoy sophisticated and well-phrased satire and comedy it's really fun to watch TG and JC's specials with all the antics. they are both supported by an audience. I enjoy Mr Fry's and Mr Clarkson's work equally, they're just different in style.

[footypat]

@imonpainkillers wrong.. clarkson is an idiot, fry is intelligent, sophisticated and cultured.

[DjDafader]

@ProtestantsRUs i respect ur opinion but i must disagree, i think Top Gear in general is an asset to the brits any which way u look at it.

[zloychechen5150]

@ProtestantsRUs +1 to the one on painkillers)

i'm from russia, and i think clarky is right in soo many ways, and, btw, what he does really makes me like uk. it's his job to be controversial and politically incorrect, just get on with it) your government and its departments are a national embarresment. because some things which were once good about britain are getting worse. you are in danger of becoming like russia, and that's called going backwards.

[darkcecee]

@ProtestantsRUs Oh I do like Jeremy Clarkson. He's of course very different from Fry and should never be taken seriously. But he often makes very good points in his own way. Or maybe because after I have spent 7 years watching German TV, I love anyone who is able to make a proper sentence without trying to sound American.

[psychoticmondays]

Press 1

[TranscendentLion]

0:47 - I think that started as Stephen Fry sounding interested, but became a rumbling tum.

[DRGeoduck]

Danny Baker's anecdote was entertaining, but was pretty much fictional. Anthony Newley never won an Oscar, and he wasn't even nominated for "Goldfinger", and besides, the melody for "Goldfinger" was composed by John Barry. Anthony Newley co-wrote the lyrics (with Leslie Bricusse).

[JBofBrisbane]

I have a theory that Stephen Fry and Jeremy Clarkson are actually twins separated at birth.

[sellout87]

@JBofBrisbane why do you think that? i would have thought they were complete opposites.

[ryangscott]

@JBofBrisbane What one got the good looks?

[kingpharaohtsar]

@ryangscott fry smart is hot im half his age an i wud

[oMeGaSoLjaX]

@Pitchguest Just search "qi moons" on Youtube and it's the first result. Full video name is QI - How many moons does the Earth have?

[PurpleEster]

I was just as lost as Mr. Clarkson. And yes, I would like a cup of cocoa Stephen Fry, thank you very much

.

[themilkmon]

I wish Stephen Fry would offer me a cup of cocoa :( He is sooo cool

[Choo69]

@themilkmon burning down the reichstag cool?

[themilkmon]

@Choo69 Way cooler :)

[moonshoes1000]

Danny baker a nob.

[Babyhowdy233]

In 1948, Newley was cast in the best of his boyhood parts when David Lean chose Newley to play the Artful Dodger in his screen adaptation of Oliver Twist. This was before it was made into the musical "Oliver" so yes, Newley was well before Steve Marriott, Davey Jones, etc. in portraying the Artful Dodger years later.

[Babyhowdy233]

(cont.) One of the inspirations was actually "Mack the Knife", which director Guy Hamilton showed Barry as he thought it was a "gritty and rough" song that could be a good model for what the film required. My old boss was a close friend of BOTH Newley and Sir George Martin (who produced it) so he got the straight story on this song's creation.

[Babyhowdy233]

Actually, this story isn't true. The REAL story:Upon being asked to create a theme song for the film in progress, Bricusse and Newley looked at each other instantly and sang out, "Goldfinger . . . wider than a mile," reprising "Moon River," the successful theme song from Breakfast at Tiffany's. John Barry-who was the one who composed the music (NOT Newley) was NOT amused,lol (cont.)

[aaron9099]

I demand that Brian Blessed come on this show immediately.

And I was also thinking that the dude wrote Goldfinger, and not the score.

[oMeGaSoLjaX]

Does anyone know of the clip where Stephen swears at Alan.. he speaks with a gap in between each word and is sort of rocking back and forwards with rage and it's utterly hilarious but I can't for the life of me remember the topic or what was said exactly. And it's not the blood clot joke. Something to do with planets?

[VioIentGoIdFish]

@oMeGaSoLjaX there was something like that where they were talking about mars, and alan says something like 'why do we even need to go there?' and fry practically loses it for a second. not sure where the vid is though

[oMeGaSoLjaX]

@VioIentGoIdFish Thanks, that narrows it down a lot. He really does lose it and it's utterly hilarious.

[MissAlisso]

@oMeGaSoLjaX It was in a discussion of how many moons the Earth has. Alan asks why he's never heard of the second moon before, and Stephen says "that's because it was discovered in nineteen-ninety-f#*king-four!" :D

[oMeGaSoLjaX]

@MissAlisso YES. THAT. I actually love you.. spent hours looking for it.

[Pitchguest]

@oMeGaSoLjaX

It's the one where Alan asks if we even learn anything in school, and then Stephen goes off. Haha. I was pissin' meself.

[Pitchguest]

@oMeGaSoLjaX

But you know what's amazing, I can't find the fucking clip now. For months now, I've been able to search for it and there it is. Someone else asks for it, poof, vanished. Mad. But there you go. Life. Why make sense of it all.

[summitsvift]

is that suppose to be funny ? to be honest Jeremy is the funniest man on that show just for sitting there not even saying a thing

[KitchenKiller95]

i love stephen's tie!

[ToriBird330]

Ninety-two years old and i've never had oral sex. 

[CountJoe1]

@ToriBird330 Ha loser.

[ToriBird330]

@CountJoe1 ...I assume you don't know the cocoa skit from a Bit Of Fry And Laurie.

[hildegain]

@ToriBird330 Apparently not.

[YTTalentShout]

@ToriBird330 I would stop using YouTube then, it ain't gonna suck itself.

[jacobCtotheM]

@MrNerosasca film is moonraker, spng is moon river :s

[jumbodavejimbo]

@atjnAdfhhjea Thanks, you kid of backed up my point, a lot of people don't read, and you said not everybody pays attention to the "funny scribbles" they won't know who he his.

[rej1960]

Oh, do try and keep up, Jeremy...

[iamXSTEALTHZX]

i thought he meant he wrote the film not the music

[SuperMerryhappy]

I think i had competely lost track of what they were talking about to

[DayDreamtoSleep]

I thought he meant the film as well..

[niceguy1068]

Come on BBC, you don't give out the punchline in the title!

[coltsuperocean10]

@niceguy1068 ...Come on niceguy1068 you need to get out more. Seriously, you really need to get a grip on reality. You are 1 sad person.

[lukabert88]

@niceguy1068 look for any of the young ones clips, it seems to be a theme the bbc dig

[hedonism13]

@niceguy1068

Come on niceguy1068, you don't need to tell me that it's the punchline.

I haven't even finished the clip yet, I've paused at 0:46 now that I've seen your comment.

;_;

[kevinastraw]

Clarkson has sniffed too much...petrol!

[Orlabobz]

I do love fry and laurie, and indeed blackadder references in QI... :)

[mushroommagic144]

Jeremy Clarkson is an idiot.

[shaggymattrocks]

@mushroommagic144

like you ;)

[Fab4Sunrises]

The way Stephen says "Would you like a cup of cocoa?" makes me think that at that moment he was speaking in code.

What he MEANT was "Are you retarded?"

[TheSobek]

@Fab4Sunrises The way you phrased that comment...

[arwenae]

0:37 poor Jeremy's face.

[Sznaxarna]

Goldfinger did not win an Oscar, it wasn't even nominated, and Moon River won in 1962, three years before Goldfinger could have been nominated. So sadly the anecdote is completely false.

[Doug416217]

@Sznaxarna Actually, it did. But it was for sound editing. I think Danny Baker is simply stretching some of the facts, or was simply confused about which years it won

[Sznaxarna]

@Doug416217: I meant the song, not the film.

[Sznaxarna]

Goldfinger did not win an Oscar (it wasn't even nominated, and Moon River won in 1962, three years before Goldfinger could have been nominated. So sadly the anecdote is completely false.

[Jackiesstash08]

Danny whatsit is really fat these days. Where's bill bailey? Clarkson was probs bored like I was.

[hornetgags]

@Jackiesstash08 Danny Baker is actually battling against cancer at the moment.

[Jackiesstash08]

@hornetgags really? now i feel a right bastard.

[chrislarson15]

@hornetgags I don't see how that's relevant to a comment out his weight.

[hornetgags]

@chrislarson15 It's not, I was just pointing out he is battling against cancer. Apologies if it offended your delicate sensibilities.

[chrislarson15]

@hornetgags Well, you must be a sick person if the first thing you think about when you hear someone's name is their ailments.

[hornetgags]

@chrislarson15 Wow thank you, I've been waiting to speak to a dickhead and you have helped me achieve one of my ambitions. Seriously you're not very intelligent are you?

[chrislarson15]

@hornetgags More intelligent than you think. I'm just curious as to why the first thing that comes to mind when someone comments about Danny Baker is that he's battling cancer. It just seems messed up.

[hornetgags]

@chrislarson15 Ok I'm going to let you have the last word after this as I can feel my brain cells committing suicide when engaging you in conversation. I don't understand why you feel it's messed up. If I was to say Michael J Fox acts a little weird these days are we not meant to say "Well he has Parkinsons". Get over yourself for one second. Danny Baker is battling cancer, fact...just deal with it and stop trying to cause an argument when there is absolutely no point.

[chrislarson15]

@hornetgags But if someone were to say "Michael J Fox's hair seems to be thinning" you wouldn't say "Um, Michael J Fox has Parkinson's."

[dafyddwood]

@chrislarson15 Yes, you probably would. If an ill person's physical appearance deteriorates and you're wondering how such a change could have occurred of course you'd firstly explain it as a result, directly or not, of their battle with illness. The stress of living with Parkinson's could easily lead to hair loss, just as having to go through Chemotherapy makes you less active and increases your chances of depression therefore increasing your likelihood of gaining weight.

[Ryoushadow]

@hornetgags As someone with a terminal illness I feel obliged to explain to you that what you're doing is seeing Danny Baker, and then seeing cancer. This is a great frustration for most people like me (From my experience and conversations of people in similar situations) because it feels like you're seeing us as the disease. Danny Baker HAS cancer, not he IS cancer. He has done many things in his life and if you now start seeing him simply as "that guy with cancer" frankly, it's disrespectful.

[dafyddwood]

@Ryoushadow he never said Danny Baked is cancer, he said he is battling against cancer, which is a lot closer to saying he has cancer than that he is, in fact, himself a cancer.

[dafyddwood]

@hornetgags just ignore that nob, he's either a troll or a simpleton. Either way, not worth bothering with :)

[isbourne]

"To be fair" they said he was a singer and that he had won a Tony, a music award. At no point did they imply he wrote the film. The only mention of film was that he had acted once. You want to defend someone you like, which is fine, but it has nothing to do with being fair, iwantnovocaine, and the (at this point) 54 people who gave you a thumbs up.

[Aspire198]

Lol I was the. Same as Jeremy

[MARKY10B]

DME lot!

[MARKY10B]

LOL! XD

[LoveSmerch]

I felt like Jezza all the way through this.

[muffin33113]

@LoveSmerch Same here!

[JankeyL]

Love the tie

[PjotrSpot]

Good old Berent's cocoa...

[4321chanson]

When Stephen says 'Would you like a cup of cocoa?' it immediately reminds me of scene from A Bit Of Fry And Laurie... XD

[NebulaOwl]

@4321chanson

"Here you go Mr Simnock"

[gbushimprov]

@4321chanson Privatisation of the police?

[jsabbath01]

@4321chanson i think its meant to haha

[4321chanson]

@jsabbath01 Yes, that's probably true... Still damn funny though!

[ibmental]

@4321chanson Your cocoa will be coming in a minute! :D

[bleemo2000]

@4321chanson Involving Nepalese Women?

[ElijahsImpact]

@4321chanson Mr Simnock?

[aforcevids]

@4321chanson

I want my cocoa, Brian!

[fullfrontalfrank]

To be fair if I was there I would have been just as clueless as Clarkson.

[DarthRevan1051]

at the start stephen sounds like peter cook

[weavehole]

Slightly different version of the story from John Barry's imdb:

At one point during the inception of his song "Goldfinger," Barry approached fellow-composers Anthony Newley and Leslie Bricusse about writing the lyrics. Barry proceeded to play the first few bars and both men sang: "... wider than a mile ..." (from Henry Mancini's "Moon River"). The first three notes of both songs have identical melodies.

[IllidandsBro]

Moonriver... :-D

[iwantnovacaine]

To be fair to Jez, they did imply that he wrote the film (music wasn't mentioned).

[kisbie]

@iwantnovacaine Stephen mentions music early on ("he sings in a hundred syllables"). The name of the song is the same as that of the film, but surely a Bond fan would grasp what Danny meant straight away? Then again, Clarkson is 50 now.

[Redheadfury]

@kisbie But Clarkson isn't a "Bond Fan"? He thinks it's OK, but everyone knows who wrote it...

[kisbie]

@Redheadfury I suppose Clarkson is more interested in the alpha-macho elements of Bond (the wheels and the pussy galore) as opposed to the homosexualist elements, like the Shirley Bassey theme tunes.

[Mysterious0Bob]

@iwantnovacaine Yeah, I thought they meant the screenplay too.

[cooliovasquez]

@iwantnovacaine except when he said he went up against henry mancini

[ronnysoeberg]

@iwantnovacaine If you didn't know already that Anthony Newly wrote musical scores for films the bit with Henry Mancini should have pointed you in the direction of scores. It was probably mentioned earlier in the episode as well, I presume.

[datswotimtknbout]

@iwantnovacaine jez? good mates?

[Vexion193]

@iwantnovacaine Goldfinger is written by Ian Flemming as are most of the bond films seeing as they're his books. Its common knowledge.

[jumbodavejimbo]

@Vexion193 Its not common knowledge, unless you've read the books, or bothered to find out.

[Vexion193]

@jumbodavejimbo At the begin of nearly EVERY bond film it says "based on the novel by Ian Fleming"..... Your point is invalid.

[jumbodavejimbo]

@Vexion193 Go out and do a survey then, just because you've seen it doesn't mean other people have.

[atjnAdfhhjea]

@jumbodavejimbo Just because not everybody pays attention to the funny scribbles at the beginnings of movies doesn't mean it's not common knowledge.

[atjnAdfhhjea]

@Vexion193 Did Ian Fleming also write the films? Because if the films are adapted from his novels by someone else, technically, he didn't write them, just the inspiration for them.

[JWCJBONE]

wat