The dysfunctional family and the contemplative life

[stugandolf]

I do not think I have ever experienced a functional family... Stu

[Jhananda]

@stugandolf you might be right there about that.

[wonkerman4]

That was great. Thanks.

I too live with a dysfunctional family.

You uploaded this on the day of my 22nd birthday ;). So now im 22 and on to try to live a long sought-after contemplative life. :D

[Jhananda]

@wonkerman4 May you be successful in your contemplative life and attain the superior fruit (maha-phala) of the contemplative life

[wonkerman4]

@Jhananda Thank you very much.

Im following your videos as you provide good examples and food for thought. :)

[Jhananda]

@wonkerman4 Thank-you for expressing your kind thoughts. Too often I receive unkind thoughts from Buddhists, because I do not happen to support some mainstream Buddhists interpretations of the Buddha dhamma.

[HelloMellowed]

:)

I'd be interested in other things you needed to break free from to lead a contemplative life.

For instance I think monastics can go too far from material life, even forbidding entertainment and taking a repressive (?) view of all sensual pleasures.

[Jhananda]

@HelloMellowed Stay tuned, because there will be more on this subject that is right in with what you are suggesting

[HelloMellowed]

I wouldn't say I am rigorous, but even an active inclination towards this way of dealing life is in complete opposition of family dynamics, more often than not. For a start, they tend to illuminate the really ugly relationships most people tend to dismiss as harmless. And then, if you want to calm your mind, it's very hard when close ones live off drama, and the drama is unconscious, with you responding unconsciously, almost automatically in sick ways. And we are talking about normal families.

[Jhananda]

@HelloMellowed Oh, I thought you were writing about my family:-)

[aglorincz]

i've come to the same conclusion. the issue is every family seems outwardly normal, so every person thinks they're the only one with a dysfunctional family.

[Jhananda]

@aglorincz Yes, I agree, most people and most families have a very well-practiced facade of calm and tranquility while underneath they wreak of stress and anxiety. A rigorous, self-aware contemplative will become aware of this facade, and become repelled by it.