Eli's Dirty Jokes - Episode 42 - First Drink

[johnpar1231]

whatjokes. com

[xzghostplayerxz]

this is not a really good joke

[machinimater]

how did they know it was a boy?

[russellmania77]

this was really terrible

[phionexking2]

i dont get it!

[umicantthink1]

where'd the underwear come from

[SandraMonkey01]

monkey and the bj

[MrHbomb20]

he looks like bobby from Bobbys World

[0hthswhy]

i thought it was going to go down like this: *POP* *POP* two legs pop out!.. there was still some of the drink left and drank the rest... *WOOSH* *POP* OH MY GOD DAD I GREW A THIRD LEG!! where? well between my legs!

[OliviasCheesex3]

Ohhh... 6mins later.

[Anguirus59]

@OliviasCheesex3- LOL

[OliviasCheesex3]

What? Someone explain this to me.

[galapin26]

I DON"T GET IT

[TheDarex1523]

Lol I was like.. wait what? (1.75 seconds later) .. OHHH haha.

[EvAnAlMiGhTy1995]

ba dum ting

[Ra1dersFoLife]

Eli baby in the back ground

[thepugpoet]

HOW THE FUCK IS ANY OF THAT POSSIBLE?

[gatorman02]

Liked it

[roganscrib]

Baby Eli at 0:21 haaaha

[andytheshark]

If you don't get it he says "He should have quit while he was ahead" and he was A head before he drank the alcohol

[killette2]

He was a yukkuri!

[dmtoflinski2]

there once was a genie with a seven foot weinie who showed it to the girl next door she thought it was a snake so she hit it with a rake and now its only five foot four XD

[QuantisHero]

OMFG cute baby Eli 0:21

[luv2Dance34345]

that was terrible and not dirty at all.... and he randomly shows up with underwear lol

[ThePoisonpizza]

he should have quit while he was aHEAD rofl XD

[wwefan12372]

الله اكبر

[Authoritybeatz]

thumbs up if you read this joke somewhere before

[bassxpro]

i just peed a little

[rapidkid28]

eli baby at 0:20

[MrSubthezero]

0:22 angt birds

[DarkJakable]

Cruel and unusual PUNishment.

[yusmiffins]

this is terrible ):

[michaeljackoisdabest]

How is this dirty

[tailsfan55]

@michaeljackoisdabest Alchohol is somehow

[azboi911]

@0:23 angry bird!! XD

[kidswhorock98]

@GrrrlinStilettos he should have quit while he was A HEAD meaning ahead. I just got it now :D

[Spectrocity]

"Real Life: Bobby's World"

[princeboy3idk]

How did he get underwear when he didn't wear any?

[Ciukyexacta]

@princeboy3idk The alcohol effect :] xD

[electrobussterr]

These jokes are so dry that's why I like em

[1224clayboy]

where did he get the underpants from?



[aaronzack14]

since when do people have 8 fingers?

[sk8tr65]

done! i have oficially found eli hidden in ALL his dirty jokes! :D

[mikester966]

"the a bus hits him and kills him instantly"

joke should have ended there xD

[Brezzygirl22]

My favorite one is the one where the leprechaun stuck his d.... in tht manz butt

[PicklesParodyPalace]

stupid joke

[Sugahpappaya]

Damn that was funny hahaha

[ChuckFuckingNorris55]

did you notice that the last episode was on the tv

[Chanty4N0w]

How did underwear pop up? Wouldn't he be naked?

[pokemon9513]

press 2 for the meaning of compassion

[dirtywater121698]

pause it hold left for 4 secs and press up

[7popsc5if]

What a lightweight.

[TacoSmakker]

@ibry12 He should have quit when he was ahead. Or " A Head", because at first he was just a head.

[crossie2003]

Maybe he should've just quit when he was legless.

[78uh]

I thought there was going to be a "Giving head" Joke, but this is pretty funny....

[wanapiss]

dude these make me laugh so hard. and the guys laughing at the end only adds to it

[kononenkogal123]

where's episode 41?

[StevenStevenson1990]

@kononenkogal123 episode 41 is the holiday special episode i think

[thatlostguy22]

Did anyone notice @ 1:19 on the TV was episode 34?

[Rich13Giants]

1:20 pirate joke!!!!!!!!

[Rich13Giants]

0:20 eli baby and his daddy looking through the glass

[D1n35]

Heard it before -_-

[MDotSerious]

.... i don't get it *_*

[SweHuntah123]

@MDotSerious There's 4 comments below yours, explaining the joke, do you never read the comments?

[MDotSerious]

@SweHuntah123 yea i usually do. but then i got the joke like 15seconds after posting my comment, i went to delete my comment but it wouldn't appear :/

[Travusable]

tht was a cruel joke..

[shibb90]

you missed joke 41... or was it just me?

[dsaleem23]

ayone notice that poser at the top left corner at 0:38

[Uriel6178]

im sorry, but you have to be an idiot not to get it.

"quit while he was AHEAD"

A-HEAD

a head.

[cheerrose09]

he said he should have quit while he was a head, meaning he should have stay being a head.

[sharpwingx6]

The father shocked...*looks down son's torso*

Father's mind: omg my son doesnt have a dick...

..he then urges him to take another drink

[kivan0623]

My favorite is Whale of a good time and Prime Mates.

[crowneldex]

this is mah favorite



[bell12120]

is it a dirty joke?

[coolshivthegreatest]

i din't get it?!??

[30SecondsToTom]

@coolshivthegreatest ahead, a head? like how he was born with only a head?

[lronPriest0fMetal]

meh that wasnt very funny

[ineedascreenname1]

Oh yeah, my badd!

[Riond551]

That was a bit much but it was still pretty funny.

[ineedascreenname1]

He should've quit while he was a head!

[AdmiralMooseKaw]

@ineedascreenname1 well, hey, thanks for ruining the punch line. youre cool

[bell12120]

@ineedascreenname1 ohhh

[mizshoppah]

i get it, i just dont think its really funny

[IzzyBuzyFrizzy]

This one is actually kind of sad. xD In a weird way.

[TheCutebarbieslover]

thats the only one thats not dirty 

[bongopin2]

that was fucked up

[NightmareSpriter]

lol XD 0:20 theres a creepy pervert looking at the Eli baby thru the window XD

[koldingfjord]

@NightmareSpriter It's a nurse.

[cbonde101]

@NightmareSpriter Look under it and you'll see Eli!

[NightmareSpriter]

@cbonde101 -.- .... k

[TheArtieParty1]

@NightmareSpriter Are you stupid?

[NightmareSpriter]

@TheArtieParty1 lol r you you an idiot X3

[eggatastic]

its weird how the legs popped out with underwear

[greendogsoup]

This wasnt dirty.... only corny

[thenewandrei4o94]

he should have WHAT????

[Tzom]

@thenewandrei4o94 quit while he was ahead....." a head"

[Biohacks]

where espidoe 41 :(

[s3Xy5tuff]

pt. 2 after a few more drinks they all feel guilty so they start confesing their lies. the one from engalng says: ok. when our fleet is in the sea you can see the water. then the one from usa says ok. when our planes are in the air you can see the sky. then the one from finland said: ok. my friend doesent live in the center of helsinki.

[s3Xy5tuff]

pt.1 there were three men sitting at a bar. 1 from england 1 from usa and 1 from finland. after a few drinks the one from england says: our navys fleet is so big that when all the boats are in the sea you cant see the water. then the one from usa replied: well our airforce has so many planes that when they have all the planes in the air you cant see the sky. then the one from finland wanted to brag some too so he said: my friend who lives in the center of helsinki has a meter long dick.

[MultiDeanster]

I don't understand this sufisicated video, you young children watch. Now that you have already fricking watched this fricking video, you fricking dipwads better tell me what the fricking beeper stickin' this frickign video frickin means, you fricking dick stickin' twerps that eat your mother's.. OH HELLO HERE COMES MY MOM!!!! EXPLAIN PLEASE!!!

[huskerboy430]

@MultiDeanster haha dude this is lauren go dobben boptelaca in the swimming pool bahahah! does that help with the explanation? jk

[theguywhopoos1]

316 people have dead sons that for most of their lives were heads

[huskerboy430]

@theguywhopoos1 i dont get what u just said

[unknown19811]

Ok with legs,torso and head...

But what about the underwear that appeared out of nothing???

[RageOfDante16]

@unknown19811 dont you remember it pop out?

[yocummegan]

How would they know if it's a boy. If he is just a head..?

[TrainerJaz31497]

@yocummegan I'm pretty sure the 5 o'clock shadow would've given it away.

[ImmaPepsiPerson]

@yocummegan voice

[sigge951]

@yocummegan the beard

[swisscheesepotatochi]

@yocummegan How would it be alive it was just a head?

[Iambenjoz]

@yocummegan You can only tell it's a boy with two heads. LOL. - Benjoz

[Retact]

I heard something similar, but the ending was different. The boy gets his legs and is rather drunk but, when he sees he has no penis, he takes another shot. Then he completely turning into an enormousness penis. His father tells him to take it as a lesson, Drinking to much makes everyone a big dick.

[1033medic]

my teacher actually told me this one lol

[Primtoss]

@shadowcharizard10 Magic how the hell do you think ?

[jokkepokke95]

@shadowcharizard10

go to /b/ newfag, there's plenty of CP there

[cowboysps3]

i like the way u think is the best one



[donotgettmeseriously]

that aint funy

[benry200]

MORE!

[Fratzicka]

i think the bartender says " he should have quit while he was aHEAD "

[rwjmgmannoyorangefan]

i don't understand wath the bartender says at the end

[MISHRAIF]

How it should have ended.............Give me another bottle!!!!  I want to have a huge cock!

[rocco1000123]

@TheSovietBears

You are such a douche. Why the hell would you give someone shit over the Internet about having a disorder that he could not prevent? And if doing that is something that pleases you, than you are the one with the real problem.

[RockingChicka73]

this was the worst thing ever. and i loved it.

[NYMusicManiac]

wow that was dumb i luved it

[TheSovietBears]

dont fucking get it some one explain

[TheZombieOutOfHell]

@TheSovietBears

if you don't get it you shouldn't have it explained.

[TheSovietBears]

@TheZombieOutOfHell eather your on a period or you have a bent way of resoning . are you having trouble talking to people in a normal way ore are you a lonly faggot who lives in his moms basement who has nothing better to do but to put use less comments on the internet begging for attention . go see a therapist your suffering from adhd or your bipolar. otherwise if you not helpfull mind your oun buisness and go be a useless medeocre elsewere

[TheZombieOutOfHell]

@TheSovietBears

i actually do have ADHD and, it's true. if you don't get a joke you shouldn't have it explained to you. also, you just describe The7r0ll so if that's who you're comparing me to then you failed epicly.

[TheSovietBears]

@TheZombieOutOfHell hahaha you have adhd its soo sad to be you btw i diddnt quite get your point on your last comment maybe you should pay attention to what you write and again stop bieng a useless fuck i dont really care about the joke ,all i wanted is an explenation so control your hyperactive disorder and dont jump and give useless comments and bullshit no one likes trolls like you

[TheZombieOutOfHell]

@TheSovietBears

I find it sad to be you. No life, always on the internet, arguing over a fucking joke. Man, I wonder what goes through the Special Ed mind of yours. Also, if you don't care about the joke, why do you want an explanation dumbfuck?

[TheSovietBears]

@TheZombieOutOfHell lol you reapeated half of what i said and your getting pretty angry i suggest you take your meds

[TheZombieOutOfHell]

@TheSovietBears

Whatever, go suck your mom's dick and have a terrible life. You're just gonna waste time replying to this so go out there and see if you can find that special man.

[TheSovietBears]

@TheZombieOutOfHell woa i shudda known your prone to tantrums are you bipolar?? or are you just mad the old guy in a van toutched you when you were  ??

[TheSovietBears]

@TheZombieOutOfHell woa i shudda known your prone to tantrums are you bipolar?? or are you just mad the old guy in a van touched you ??

[1MinajFan]

i dont get it

[94XJ]

How is it a boy if he's just a head?

[uduttybloodclart]

@94XJ looooool yr comment is jokes!!!

[GinaAmsterdam]

creeper 0:21

[TheAbandon13]

i dont get it..



[Pretendkid]

"and racism as well as you can with love and compassion"

TRANSLATE AUDIO LOOOOOL

[huskerboy430]

what does it mean you should have stopped when you were ahead????

[Orangeys]

I must say, that joke was not dirty.

[ChromaAurora]

Didn't the Vicar of Dibley already say this joke?

[ngubod16]

Why are the Dad's tears black? he wearing mascara?

[TheAbrenica]

thumbs up if you look for episode 41 but you can't see

[malamimi200]

@TheAbrenica its a holiday special and its really funny

[hbkusa]

@TheAbrenica Eli's Dirty Jokes #41 is titled "Holiday."

/watch?v=-j8Bql4vw8c&feature=r­elmfu

[jaydimes10851]

he has a baseball glove for football XD

[Foroyar123]

Pirate joke at 1:23

[arvydc45]

the joke about pirates was on TV

[longlegs226]

lol

[tjhanlon1]

0:21 eli is a baby

[TheLongboarderguy]

ohhh i get it!!!

[xrdxex]

anyone ever think of how he was able to drink and ya know not have to piss

[FireStarDoink]

I don't get it.

[noeleen92]

@FireStarDoink neither I

[Be1smaht]

@FireStarDoink yeah I didn't either...but I just got it. He wanted him to quit while he was a head. The boy only had a head in the beginning.

.

[TuShawrrt2]

@FireStarDoink while he was a head

[thecommibunny]

@FireStarDoink While he was ahead... A HEAD!

[AuzzieBoredguy]

The other baby is eli

[Brugar18]

easy comes, easy goes

[makthepeanutful]

These Jokes are so old and yet people are still viewing them!(: