Jumping The Shark

[FatalError248]

haha.. myspace.

[zonkov88]

u are fucking hilarious

and so far the only "youtube comedian" ive come across who seems to be capable of subtle, intelligent humour

[danthemango]

WHAT SIDEBAR ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT? WHAT EBAY AUCTION?? I'M SO CONFUSED!

[almostshelby]

I love everything Bernard says :)

[soes0kavion]

Some people... I mean rly, fucking hobos who think dissing youtubers off is "fun".

[sirdangolot5]

Bernard is an arrogant donkey cock.

[TheLittleKristy]

I love you. I really do. Let's get married.

[ElizaAcheron]

very cool.

[myusernameonce]

This is one of your best by far. or at least by a distance.

[thething91]

dude ur the best XD

[MrMacpod]

Dude I saw ONE of your videos and LOVED them all

I am soo sucribing!

[firekight97]

most of the numbers have their date of birth

[Crazydrumlover]

wad up my little 12 year old kid

[chiefofrice]

6:00 loses it loses it loses it

[XxsasXXassaultxX]

5:47 so original

[hazeldelirium]

5:47 made me laugh =]

reminds me of someone i know XD

[kizensilverwofl22122]

6:00 so serious xD

[cronodob]

your videos are unpredictable and original

i really do have to thank you for that

ok

[Fahad1422]

*****

you are weirdly funny dude.

[BringbackSWATcats]

For no other reason than the fact that no one has posted this in a bit, Bernard is an arrogant donkey cock!

[Tarateesh]

Bernard ur a virgin u have neva kissed a girl in ur life u have neva touchd an ass in ur life u are probably a homo pufta who masterbates 24/7 for a living

[MrHydez]

mirror effect? do you see your self in others?

[Tarateesh]

WTF dude i didnt write that shit my fukin punk ass lil bro did i forgot to log off and he has caused me problems, please understand.

[LoreleiMission]

Oddly enough, this was the first Church of Blow video I ever saw. And I was quite confused by it.  Until I went back and watched all the rest from the beginning. :)

[HappyCabbie]

Yes he has a great sense of witty humor. I just wish he uploaded more.

[CHAYSE31]

hey man good stuff, keep making vids.

[numbdoII]

Mr. Bernard Smith, please stop the madness; please destroy all copies of my videos.

[Jasonkingkon]

holy shit its numbdoll?

[weepingprophet]

It isn't numbdoll.

[Jasonkingkon]

ahh

[TheBlackTheatre]

Weepingprophet would know ;)

[Maccps]

why did you call this vid. Jumping the Shark

[dougules]

woah, I watched the whole damn thing

[mrpureljbk]

well you forgot to add you fucker at the end so i will not answer your question

[novanuke21]

purplehelmet asks....What the hell is a mater with u people no that is not what no that is not what  purplehelmet asks i don't give a shit what purple helmet asks (lmfao)

[PGLhaos]

jajajajaja

shut the fuck up! like being controlled? :) gJ

[metalgearkite]

I laugh every time I see your initials. B.S., BS, gettit? You don't have to laugh, I know you think I'm funny. ^^

[PurpleFunnyChocolate]

...Brain Syndrome?

I don't get it.

[metalgearkite]

Bernard Smith? Bull Shi*t?

[PurpleFunnyChocolate]

haha that's brilliant :) lol

[metalgearkite]

lol, Thanks. XD

[metalgearkite]

shuuuunnuh.

Oh, you and your ability to make me laugh.

[qruff63]

Yes, I would let George Clooney operate on my children, thank you for asking.

[pinoykulet]

You fucker, go make a video

[mikebreaker]

funny how you randomly choose all the phallic type names to read. Get the penis off your mind and make a new movie already.

[6cheesy6]

Maybe, but i need proof.

LOL ;D

[metalgearkite]

i love your vids, your hilarious.^^

[andysnadden]

You`re not really a serious actor dude. You`re really wooden and your stare is really manic and deranged. Highly unpleasant.

[metalgearkite]

thats part of what makes it funny ^^

[LoreleiMission]

I love his manic stare too

[onebrowraised]

when it comes to toilet tissue...do you fold or crumple? just asking

[PurpleFunnyChocolate]

Crumple. I know that wasn't for me but it was an interesting question.

[6cheesy6]

U are realy like Dr who

[stupidorc]

Your gaze is so psycho! But somehow familiar^^

[commanderplank]

yep, he looks like the young Frankie Muniz - Malcom in the middle

[MadameDeces]

Jodorowsky is still alive!!!

I'd love to see you working with him, in some kind of Panic Theater piece for the Screen :-)

What about Bunuel?

[LoreleiMission]

First 2 seconds PSYCH!

[SmashingEternity]

You are quite hilarious. I love all your videos. =D

[OneProduktionFilm]

T shirt really where do i get it. Does it say that Bernard is an arogant donkey cock? That would be great

[oliman08]

I'll never unsubscribe BerNard!

[alanwang96]

Hai,you are bullshit,kthxbai.

[henrry222]

you suck

[Members0]

how can you keep a strait face when you talk about these things, i couldn't stop laughing at all your side stories like "the family two doors down from me"

[firekight97]

can u please stop the swearing is bad 4 u and youtube and y don't u make some money u jackass

[natr777]

you fucker so im not awnser ur question xD lol

[1LBRTY]

Have you been having some really good experiences sexually and romantically?

Just wondering if that explains things.

[pofwiwice]

one big demented family

[Dot2TheLock]

YOUR ARE THE FUCKING MAN!!!

[daymoon2k]

you suck hahaha

[Mikalino13]

The Reverend bit reminds me of Nathan Barley.

I am not a preacher man.

[Rydon9]

you were in a musicial number its called youtube is my life

[FineJustUnique]

I would George Clooney operate on my children..(If I had children..) and yes I'm ashamed of my username now^^

I love you you're brilliant!

[Ninjeew]

Haha, you are great.

Yeah, sorry. I did send you a mail thing :<

[DarkUnknown7]

i'll try to help, cuz i really want to see more videos,and i agree with you, what happend to the good people??,anyway..iam gonna see what i can do!

[gingerpride123456789]

hang on to that camara pweeeeez

[happybois]

I become Bernard Smyth when im drunk, really, man you seem too similar to me, except im black with a huge dick and u, most likely, have a vagina. you stole my ideas man! those flashbacks are guilt, man. i still dont know how u do it. Im goin to back up all your videos now before they make it to the box set and unsubscribe because i dont want to get famous for stalking some guy

[uhavemooface]

ok don't comment to this comment please...just look at these words and don't read them just look at them..thanks have a great youtube day..

[whquick]

Bernard we love you, also digging the Doctor who memorabealia in the background ;-) doctor who for the win!

[FenrirOmega13]

Its kind of beautiful. Art comes alive when viewed by those other then the creator. Once could say the same about people. Is our existence as an individual not verified by interactions with others. the physics of us bouncing off each other to prove that we exist is quite interesting and that, coupled with the sheer need to express ones own vantage point to another set of eyes, is art.

[happybois]

wow, man, an advocate of the new mindset. that just hit me like a light bulb. like raytracing, we can get a more accurate projection by tracing the interaction as it trickles down... uhh pretty abstract, i shouldnt type to myself in public spaces

[happybois]

yah, not so abstract, i just realized its the basic formula for great dialogue. if n is the depth of the conversation and d is the ratio of the actors in the scenes salaries... then the convo = n/d as the production approaches an award.. hmmmm maybe its a little more complex than that...

[FenrirOmega13]

Every time you make a video, it becomes an entity independent of you. You have taken a thought and a moment (performance) and it has broken off into an island. Now with everyone who watches it and comments of it it grows and changes in meaning.

Food for thought. You are not your video's. No Actor is. Once you post it, we own it.

[organicprankster]

No. It's meaning stays exactly the same as it was in the first place. And you don't own any part of it.

[AuDikonD]

hey bernard....have you ever been to hell? if you have...is it truelly entertaining you piece of fuck?

[Scaredycatisntapussy]

I have proof.

[yellowrainer]

"I'll leave that to lisanova...cause...she's good at...it" LOL.

[BLad30Fg0d]

where those questions real, or just part of a script?

[Kaseyshere101]

they could have been either way, but there r some pretty mental peeps here on utube

WHO KNOWS?

[BLad30Fg0d]

Smith must know.

[sukii88]

"virgins in the spears family"..haha!!

[AbbeyRoad67]

Great stuff.

[craigosean]

bernard is an aragant donkey cock

[PoemPantomime]

Weird Youtube names annoy the mess out of me, too ;>

[JonieAuthor]

Wow, not sure if he's acting but he's a bit of an arrogant prick... *sigh* Whatever...

[impikmin]

Stop using his words you arrogant prick.

[JonieAuthor]

How are those his words dumbass? I've never heard him use them first of all, and secondly, you can't own words idiot.

"Ignorant prick" describes him in this video just like 'asshole' desribes my impression of you... or can't I say that word either?

[BenjyFly]

i love ur videos man!!!!!!!!

[crazybilby]

lol

[Tammyhanks]

You are amazing!!!!

[SRGR1918]

lol, good stuff. Could you please do more videos like this? and my name is my initials...so is the number on the name.

[divinedamsel]

What is up with all of the star wars pictures? I like the video though!

[Kaseyshere101]

im not a little person!!1

IM A BIG PERSON!!

A VERY BIG IMPORTANT PERSON!

SHUT UP!!!!

:D

[SilverBlood666]

Sweet.

[Kasperklysner]

You are a arrogant donkey cock.

[dirtboy54]

Bernard is an arrogant donkey cock.

[Kasperklysner]

Send him a mail instead >:

[Kasperklysner]

Send him a mail instead >:

[ipathismypath]

hahah ur videos are so funny

[ungasa33]

but I thought animated (.Y.)'s are okay to look at. I have been doing wrong all this time? Excuse me while I go curl up in a corner and cry for a solid 2 and a half hours.

[alexkehrli]

i love your videos

[Rydon9]

I CANT STOP WATCING YOUR VIDS JUST 2 FUNNY will you be making a series tree and your a very funny and strange person if you could ave lunc wit tree people in te world wo would it be?

[Rydon9]

ROFL so funny and i agree wtf is with the youtube account names like magicdildomcnut745

[mekshup]

ZzZzZzZ

Youtube is my life

is better than this vid :o

xd

maybe because i dont understand well english -.-

XDD

[SHADOWGUY12]

Good English. Well is used for verbs.

[PolosOnAStraw]

Lol ^_^

[icarteri]

Bernard is awsome

[reconartist]

This video was complete waste of my time. But God I laughed my ass off.

I'm a new subscriber. Thanks for wasting my time, Mr. Smith.

[remigo]

jezus weener

You rock

[Gugrick]

Bernard Smith with a I, what movie would u like to have been in?

[bfo68]

lmfao

[99cupsofcoffee]

hahaah

[beckersher]

There should be epic ballads written about your eyebrows. Is there a YouTube award for Most Emotive Eyebrows? Gosh.

[happybois]

the eyebrows, mine are like that, i always do this ^0) if that makes sense

[saavvvyyyy]

Which actors/actresses would you like to work with if you got the chance?

[ambaba543]

The "Purple Helmet asks..." segment is one of the funniest moments on the ChurchofBlow channel

[LoreleiMission]

Oh, good god. I suddenly realized why Bernard says he didn't do a musical number. [slapping my own forehead]

[Siltun]

Really? i don't

[animesuck]

why? 0.0

[SHADOWGUY12]

"FatDildo69, at least I know why you chose that number."

[Dec4p1tation]

AHAHHAHA purple helemet asks "WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU PEOPLE, no thats not what purplehelmet asked i couldn't give a shit what purple helmet said" fucking hurlaroius

[exdragonfire]

whats your favorite film?

[Max403]

You look like Simon Pegg. You know, that actor that has actually directed and starred in some movies. I joke, I joke. 1st video I've seen from you. I cant remember where I got your name.  Must have been whatthebuck or nalts. Anyway, you know how time consuming it is to try and subscribe to youtube as Max, then Max1, Max2.....all the way to Max403. God, my fingers are still cramped! AND I haven't seen one other damned Max anywhere!!!

[happybois]

at least u didnt start with 2000

[octavia9]

you can have my camera...id rather you use it than me.

[classicweiner272]

how dare you insult the classicweiner convention!

[dante224real1]

my mind!!!! its the terrorists!!! (AKA basic women)

ok... why is a nonexistent musical the rave at school??

oh, and birdman you fucker???

respond you fucker!!! (lol, im taking advantage of this)

[happybois]

I can tell you that comparing women to terrorist with further elaboration would only piss him off, pisses me off

[pspheaven]

I like hsnetworks vid response best

[didierfan]

YOU rule man! ^^

[Mudkipzwinrar]

Bernard is an arrogant donkey cock...?

[xxMewMewMadxx]

You Rule So Much! ^^ This Vid Has Been On 2 Months And Already 900 Odd people Have Commented

[LoreleiMission]

this is the 1st vid I ever saw of you & today I'm back during a marathon rewatch of all the Blow vids... ah, memories

[PMac1990]

The usernames you say are the best part of the entire video!

[22killerfang22]

"Well you didnt say "you fucker" so im not answering you" XD

[Sebba920]

ohh i get it now the username is a reflecting of the persons intelect '' OUCH XD, nice :P

Keep up the good work :P

[MIDNIGHTRIDER775]

I love this sarcastic humor! Please post more of such videos. I can already see a new character showing up at the horizon:

"The egocentric Bernard Smith with an i!"

[georgestar65]

what is the song about stealing your ideas

[Dmanlamius76]

I dont think (some) people are understanding the humour behind your "I didnt do a musical" statement, Bernard. You tube never was one for dryer humour...

"Hunni lingers", Classic!

[Samdog11487]

Yeah, you did. "YouTube is My Life" was a musical number.

[KuanDeedee]

Hahahah

"i use myspace for that kind of thing"

hahahahaha

[ambaba543]

Purple Helmet...

Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha

[JLUVANIME]

I would totally subscribe if I wasn't ashamed of my username now. :'D

[Kakashi465]

What about "Youtube Is My Life"??? I thought that was kinda a musical. oh well. lolz

[naveyryoko]

i love manga porn

[f00kumofo123]

Ok he is not gona read this. HE IS FUCKING COCK SUCKING GAY NAZI LOVER. At least looks like one.

[crazybilby]

LOL! XD "i dont spend hours acting out some weird fascimile of social interacting talking to pretend friends... i do that on myspace like normal people" seriously one of the most hilarious Q&A vids of ALL time!

and man i know how u feel about the camera thing :( man its so annoying people at school (ok not as major as ur problem) keep going "when r u making another video!?" and im like "I DONT OWN A CAMERA!" and no one wants to loan me theres

ive always wondered about numbers too..

[akfhome27]

LMAO 1st I was wondering why you wanted me to see Henry Winkler vids, but then I used me little ole brain and saw this and thought...hmmm? maybe? Anyway, as one of your " normal subs " I am so sorry! I will never go again.I am back and here to stay. Hey I have a question, totally off the subject { of course } Those records in the backround, top three?

[cmsgt8hewett]

what the hell is wrong with MO

[vbhfdjhvgd]

You Suck!!! lol jk

[kristinbaylis]

Do you speak French?

[PurpleFunnyChocolate]

I have a question.

Do you think my username is cool? It's very logical. You will have to reply to this to find out how and why it's logical.

Unagi.

[silvester8000]

briliant

but i understand just a few things.

but go on

[MayaRoad]

you have ababy face!

[Romanlegend123456789]

Genius.

[erikafei]

Bernard you are an amazing actor, which director would you most like to work with?

[koniko]

so.... it's Smith with an "L" right? hahaha

[planktonbob007]

it* ... damn.

[planktonbob007]

PS: Great poster of Ringo. That explains is all. Ha -- ha.

[planktonbob007]

ZzzZ. Where's the fxcking good coffee?

[m0nNickneim]

"because she is good.....at it" haha

[m0nNickneim]

"because she is good.....at it" haha

[timesdaughter]

I hope I'll see you someday in cinema or on tv. I love your mimics and the way you speak - good luck with your career!

[alison202]

are you ever going to change your hair style because it is realy a pain in the ass if u had it cut you would look alot nicer

[KGof09]

Hah, yea its never a matter of havign ideas, its about the resources, money, and equimpent and what not, making film is no easy on your wallet

[moviewatcher1212]

you rule

[heathnaruto]

yes you did make a video with music in it. you called it youtube is my life. so yes you did, so stop deniying it. it's on your youtube page.

[mizukori250]

Yes, he made a video with a music, but he's referring to the fact that he DID NOT make the music. He was the ACTOR for that video, hence why he keep repeating he's a serious ACTOR.

[1HotBroadwayChick]

Yeah, what are you talking about mizukori? He never did a musical number. I think you might be slightly insane...

[camperkid]

OMG Amazing

[shakespearelover18]

Hysterical as always. Thanks!

[jaselovett]

can someone.. anyone comment on my page what the opening music is in the opening of the church of blow videos please :D