Predator Drone Court-Martialed For Afghani Civilian Deaths

[rhominus]

Tragic. Born and raised to be a war machine then forced to kill. Who is the real monster here?

[nonadam]

"Are you a Christian?" asked the reporter of the TR425 Drone.

[Unguidedone]

300 afghani civilian dead is equel to 2 americans dead

[7255202]

@Unguidedone This just in. Now we must steralize the whole of persian ethnicity to avenge american towers.

[maksuree]

shouldn't the man who controlled it be held responsible? not the drone?

[ydnab9]

@maksuree I think you're on to something there....

[Penguinz13989]

@maksuree that's just retarded

[GayByProxy]

@maksuree I think you're missing the point of this SATIRICAL show.

[unopinionated]

@GayByProxy just maybe..

[armadica10]

Humm, Me thinks GLADOS was involved.

[shadsf342]

we should send us troops in to bushes mansion, and court martial his ass for war crimes,global terrorism, and treason, then hang him in front of the twin tower collapse area

[popcornbebop]

ARE YOU A CHRISTIAN? lol

[TheMostEvilDarkLord]

@MSGbeatz1 It's not the deaths that are humorous. It's the fact that blame is being passed to an inanimate object. Now that I have explained the joke, I must commit suicide by internet law.

[SuperWarking]

@TheMostEvilDarkLord Ahh well, according to internet law, individuals who have to take the time to explain the joke here are not to be held accountable because some people are fuckin retarded so you good bro :)

[gdaysquire]

Bad taste. Not because of the controversial nature, but because the humour is so sterile. The Onion is lame.

[NoCommentChick]

@MSGbeatz1 We may be filled with retards but don't forget us Tea Party Zombie Apocolypse survivors who are here fighting the hoards of mouth breathing savages.

[Killwhitey222]

I also think of real world objects in terms of video games.

[KingofDeathRage]

when i hear predator drone i think of mw2

[endracismguy]

this is the dumbest thing i have ever heard of who programed the thing and set its target and pressed the button lol stoopid USA

[lucariofan508]

@endracismguy

Do you know what satire is?

[endracismguy]

@lucariofan508 no

[endracismguy]

@lucariofan508 and if it is its disgusting that americans mock the deaths of so many innocents oh well one day you will pay the price and we can all then laugh at you

[lucariofan508]

@endracismguy

You should actually like this video given your views. This isn't making fun of innocent deaths, but the U.S. government. It's parodying how the government is responsible for the innocent deaths, not the drones (soldiers) that carry out the orders.

[ShadeMX4]

@endracismguy you're an idiot

[endracismguy]

@ShadeMX4 why?

[ShadeMX4]

@endracismguy because this is a parody about america's way of leaving their soldiers behind after an attack, just to claim they're clean, yet, you fail to see that this is a parody and everyone here is here to laugh, unless you're one of the retards who think the onion publicates REAL news.

seriously, there's people asking questions to a drone that haves a personality disorder, how the fuck can you takes this seriously

[endracismguy]

@ShadeMX4 i didnt even watch it lol and why joke about war and death you americans think that killing is a fun game ...sick nation

[ShadeMX4]

@endracismguy you're an idiot for thinking i'm american, i think you just killed yourself

[endracismguy]

@ShadeMX4 you sure do sound like one ..probaby an american sympathyser same thing

[endracismguy]

keep cracking jokes about your murders USA you will pay one day and then we can all laugh at you ..lol

[ShadeMX4]

@endracismguy its because of people like you who use peaceful names like end racism in their usernames are look down upon as retards

[endracismguy]

@ShadeMX4 whoa tell the truth and you are instantly labelled a retard as i said before ''sick nation'' lol

[ShadeMX4]

@endracismguy you're still a retard even if the US is a sick nation

[blindthrall]

@endracismguy That's what I'm afraid of...but do you really think China will be any better?

[endracismguy]

@blindthrall no

[GhOsTF141]

@endracismguy WOW. You'r stupid do you think the U.S makes jokes about killing people. This video is fake and guess what you don't think other nations do the same thing.

[MidnightRedemption]

i didn't laugh. why? because it's real about drones on collateral damage.

[brningpyre]

While hilarious, it does bring up a good point. Who's held accountable when remote drones, etc. cause collateral damage?

[maddyp52095]

I know that they're making a joke about it, but people fail to realize that this happens all the time where Drones are involved. The CIA doesn't need proof anymore to bomb a supposed "threat". All they're looking for is inquiry. If you live in Afghanistan and some Taliban troops come to your house asking for lunch, watch out. You are now, as far as the CIA knows, or cares to, a terrorist. The civilian to afgani insurgent death rate is 10 to 1 and no one seems to have a problem with that fact.

[musicman216]

@maddyp52095 The sad thing is... your absolutely right :(

[terramortim]

@musicman216 Just wait until they take the drone warfare home. All of the roving wiretaps that PATRIOT ACT gave us will come in handy. They can just data mine all of the political dissidents, geo-locate them via their cellphones in real time, and automatically send out drone strikes to their locations to take them out.

Change you can believe in.

[terramortim]

@musicman216 Then, as AI starts to become more sophisticated, a whole new level of inhumanity will ensue.

Change we could believe in (just like Santa Claus)

[ig88bc]

@maddyp52095 Well that and the fact that AT missiles are a little heavy when your target is usually a van.

[terramortim]

@maddyp52095 Sometimes, satire is the best truth. I like The Onion because it's actually very smart and on target. Thus is the horrific reality of "drone warfare". Drones don't disobey illegal orders. Drones don't think twice before committing genocide. Drones don't avoid civilians. It's a very dangerous idea. Just wait until they give law enforcement armed drones. You can bet there will be extra-judicial murders all over the place. Who's going to get fired, the drone?

[terramortim]

@maddyp52095 Just think about what could be done with a drone army, if a rogue general decided to "take matters into his own hands". With humans, their patriotism would likely put a stop to such a thing. It's feasible that one single rogue player could hijack the system and cause mayhem. These are all the problems with automating the military. The same couldn't be done with an all human military, as each and every soldier has a sense of duty to their country. Drones don't.

[Wasp16mm]

That is not the drone you are looking for.

get TK-422!

[ajsaccount1991]

So much for 5-Kill streaks

[keegen123456]

THESE ARE NOT THE DRONES YOU ARE LOOKING FOR

[HumanBornFree]

If a foetus can take the stand, then why not a drone?

[badarts]

But seriously.

[mmmmmarcus]

Hahahaha this is fuckin ridiculous XD

[Senship]

Brilliant

[CJEJTHEDJ]

Is it true you don't sleep? Great question!

[jopalolive]

the drone is taking the fifth

[zeonstar5]

STONE THE DRONE! STONE THE DRONE!

[aceW3RM]

LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO­OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL predator drone has an attorney "personality disorder" LMFAOO

[wafflecushioned]

So funny when the reporters question the predator drone.

[Cloudy2Clear]

Too irreverent to be funny.

[Tim0010]

haha at 0:14 the news clippings 3rd and last paragraphs on the right are the same.

[PolytoneZebraGuy]

@Tim0010 good eye =P

[elk832]

Don't blame the drone - blame it's up keeping. The robotic assembly line it was made on is the one responsible.

[guitarlawyer75]

THe drone has a personality disorder

[adammar5hall]

The judge did not issue bail, because the accused was thought to have a flight risk.

[gonzojournalists]

That's hilarious!

[JonRevere]

drone attacks are hilarious =/

[SorchaNoir]

Animatrix?

[96Ajay96]

hahah 69 dislikes ahahahaha

[steviebkhall]

It has a self-destruct ,no matter where it wrecks ! Wars ,half way around the world with peopole that don't hate each other . For people that want to make money !! PEACE ! BUT MOW THE BASTARDS DOWN ! America is just a kicking stone in the pile of misgotten politics around the globe .Fuck if its gonna be nationalism , your bound to repeat history .

[modelmajorpita]

@xanatose The weapons change, but war... war never changes.

[Bashaza]

@modelmajorpita

geek

[ASKaPHYSICIST]

"Are you a Christian?" ... That's what I tend to ask when I see a drone.

[Sylar03]

I wish they'd put up videos not from their TV show. I come onto Youtube hoping for some new videos, but end up seeing the ones I watched on their TV show...that's kinda lame.

[geitvdplas]

@Sylar03 Yeah.. it's so lame the people in Europe get to see these video's too

[Sylar03]

@geitvdplas Don't you have Hulu in Europe?

[TheUsername1029]

IT WAS A JEW!!! i mean just look at the size of its nose

[datzfast]

in fairness afghan weddings climax in AK 47 fire to the heavens. if i were a drone taking fire from men on the ground,somebody is going to catch a hellfire missile. i dont care how many pocket korans go up in smoke. i wish i could have been hired as defence for this drone.

[yobhsiFehT]

Does anyone else feel like this video actually says a lot of very serious things about the state of modern warfare?? :S

[stealthcorvette]

This is not the drone your looking for.

[SIPEROTH]

I call racism against mechanical creatures.

[zastonecesda]

JUSTICE FOR DRONES!

[AresExodus]

Man the onion is shit these days... I didn't laugh once, it's less funny than cat picture emails.

[mikiroony]

SKYNET IS AWAKE!!

[MechaArnzilla]

It does what it must because it can.

[GeorgeMaj15]

I heard it's getting the electric chair. He's going to be short-circuited in Texas--it is truly unfortunate that the actions of this despicable drone reflects the hundreds of drones that do fly straight, and are good, Christian, bombing-for-peace drones in active duty today. Support our Drones!

[bigiss1111]

I vote for TR425

[Redlocokixx]

are you christian???? 1:11 lol

[radulica]

I'm eating an onion right now.

[JunetheHomemaker]

Poor drone! Aw, TR425, keep your chin up!

[paintballgundown8]

Corrupt core, are you ready for core swap? Stalemate detected!

[dwbear7]

I want to know if it considers itself a Christian!!!

[HomoCyborgZombie]

@dwbear7 I want to see the long form manufactures manual!

[thegreatcat1]

A drone cant think for itself. These people make no sense.

[davethehostage]

@thegreatcat1 Please tell me you're being sarcastic.

[Redlocokixx]

@thegreatcat1 weak man!!!!! they all know!!!!!

[vandomVenom]

what's a drone?

[ALwizzelTV]

@saintsons12 GLADoS!

[CrolanPW]

Its really important we know the religious affiliation of the accused drone. We all know no good christian drone could ever act out in such a way.

[AwesomOver9000]

@CrolanPW When's the last time you met a 'good' christian drone...they're all heartless psychopaths with a god complex. Sure those drones all say they're doing it for the country, but I think we know they just want to blow things up.

[TheReaverOfDarkness]

@CrolanPW Actually that depends on its gender.

[Furzkampfbomber]

@CrolanPW Agreed. A good christian drone would say a prayer before it starts killing!

[Mdriver1981]

@CrolanPW, nor a Muslim drone. The Koran urges no violence, I think.

[VomitShovel]

@CrolanPW Good thinking!

[geniusjas87]

Don't the Onion have anything to say about Osama's death?

[goldieboylover986]

hey it's funnybot! :D

"awkwarrrrrrrrd"

[HawaiianBriian2]

@grahamkovacs i know its a comedy network its just not funny when u know the facts about the plane

[jauffRINDIR]

@HawaiianBriian2 get an imagination

[HawaiianBriian2]

makes no sense... predator and reaper drones are UAV's piloted by soldiers on the ground wtf

[taylor7979444]

@HawaiianBriian2 Maybe you should email The Onion and let them know. They probably didn't have that in mind when they made this video.

[HawaiianBriian2]

@taylor7979444 lol yeah, we dont have planes that control themselves... yet... lol

[Leadman1989]

@HawaiianBriian2

Nobody thinks we have artificially intelligent autonomous planes (unless they're stupid) the video is trying to make a point... watch it again with this in mind. -_-

[FutureStudy]

@Leadman1989 actually we are less than 5 years for AI drones communicating with one another.

[Leadman1989]

@FutureStudy

Perhaps but that's not what he meant, he completely missed the joke, and communication with each other wouldn't mean autonomy it would just be an intranet between them.

[TheJunkieBox]

Thumbs up if it should have had a GLaDOS voice.

[pplayer666]

300 dead afghanis? ahahahahahahahaahh what a great subject for a joke

[Leadman1989]

@pplayer666

300 dead afghans walk into a bar... the bartender says *oh shit it's the zombie apocalypse grab the fucking shotgun*

[belittle12]

I really wanted to know the drones religious philosophies.

[johnnnyboi123]

OMG this probably pisses off alot of people!!!

[supermanXL]

this sound like Movie i remember

[MrPaulAlcantara]

jail time

[sdaciuk]

One bad apple. Damn you iDrone.

[CrackaStoleMyBoat]

Free TR425

[Unguidedone]

i feel better informed now

[aenn13]

i for one bow to our ruthless computer overlords

[shadow19831]

are u christian ?  lol

[Wowzer33]

I love how one of the reporters asked the drone are you Christian towards the end.

[hogarth131313]

Thanks Coors, 15 seconds I will never get back.

[branflakes9595]

I support the drone! If you need a lawyer TR425 I'll only charge you if we win!(with a $2000 dollar downpayment)

[Cashify]

LOOK! i've had enough of you loony conspiracy theorists claiming there's someone in some closed room issuing orders to this drone. The international bankers and their defense contracting corporations don't like war anymore than anyone else. Why would they? They are only concerned with keeping american children free. Support the drones.

[JCSWMovies]

WTF how r some ppl dumb enough to think this is real news lol

[ihavemonkeysinmybutt]

ingenious! I'm assuming no one knows the deeper meaning behind this video.

[DerSchnurrbart]

It is unfortunate the immoral actions of one drone will hurt the image of all drone everywhere. We need to keep in mind that not all drones are soulless killing machines like this one is.

[masticina]

@DerSchnurrbart

And what if a drone has a consiounce and doesn't wants to go to war. We need to make sure that the feelings and rights of these drones are well handled!

[ospredator]

Yeah, blame it in the drone lol

[LordPrick]

ANONYMOUS Did It!!!!!

[HiJaayD]

LOl i love it!

[Shdowalker]

I would like to challenge this drone, if indeed it is american like it claims...then just show us your birth certificate.

[nofxmike06]

That drone is one closed-mouth SOB.

[Styleviper]

Predator Drone, made in china ha

[diejner]

LOL!

[Deanballoonatic]

THIS IS JUST THE BEGINNING!!!

THE DRONE IS A SIGN OF SKYNET TAKING OVER WITH JUDGEMENT DAY AS THE END!!!!

[rimlanin]

Finally! I used to think it was remote-controlled by people to do this kind of ferocious attack, but now I know it acted alone and the US has nothing to do with anything!

[froobcity]

omfg i really hate comercials every video now

[dedred5]

@froobcity If you use Firefox install the plug in Ad Blocker Plus,I haven't seen an ad on youtube for a year now.

[Mehlwurm18]

@froobcity

i've never had to sit through a single commercial on youtube =D

[digitalintent]

Obligatory "is this fake?"

[LeeHitlerSaddamLaden]

WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS SHIT? people contrail predator drones THEY ARE NOT ABLE TO MOVE THEMSELFS fucking shit reports u KNOW NOTHING ABOUT THE MILITRY

[patman173]

@LeeHitlerSaddamLaden Lol it's the onion...



[urchin34]

@LeeHitlerSaddamLaden lmao you are so stupid that it is funny.

[th3dig1tal0n3]

@LeeHitlerSaddamLaden Replace Kabul with Triply and you'll get the news. Why only people from US don't get satire?

[kylehyde28]

@LeeHitlerSaddamLaden ROFLOLMFASSHTIFBTHOOMFATIJSFLO­L

[afn33282]

this should have been a 4-second joke on the news ticker



[TommyHarkin]

FREE TR-425!

[fang8989]

GUILTY!!!!!

[asianmalaysian]

He was innocent. Not a charge was true. And they say he flew awaaaaaay. BRANDED!

[TacticalMonky]

@ASkyofHeads Oh yeah, and thank you for your service, Im Army but who cares...same team same fight

[TacticalMonky]

@ASkyofHeads Honestly i blame the fact that most people in todays society watch Michael Moore, and liberal news to the point where that is there view on the war...god forbid you look at both sides of the story. It just pisses me saying shit like i dont have the balls...i raised my right hand and i took that oath...the oath that only 1% of Americans take. All they hear on the news is about civilians and troops getting killed...nobody ever reports on the humanitarian side of any of it

[culwin]

@TacticalMonky Yeah I'm sure most people watch Michael Moore nightly. And that liberal news is everywhere!  Your tinfoil hat fell off.