Advice: My Husband Checks Out Other Women

[smokes2006]

Just because this lady has a PHD does not make her intelligent. Get up and leave the scene if your husband/fiancee/boyfriend is ogling other women right in front of you. Better yet, dump the loser. No woman needs to put up with that type of behavior when they are out in public with their significant other. It shows a total lack of respect for their partner.

[noworiesdee]

This woman's response if totally irresponsible to making a man responsible for his juvenile behavior.

[tjackson26]

@Meekzor

Wow are u still here?!!! Go sell ur one sided, sexiest, feminist, I am woman hear me roar like a little kitten, burn your training bra at the end of a stick thoughts to someone who really cares to hear ur debate because; we, my friend, are done.

Go get some dick or pussy, which ever suites u, I don't discriminate, I sell them both ; )

[tjackson26]

@Meekzor

Let's end this bullshit

(Ogle): 1: to look at amorously, flirtatiously, or impertinently.

2: to eye; look or stare at.

(Look): 1: to turn one's eyes toward something or in some direction in order to see

2: to glance or gaze in a manner specified

3: to use one's sight or vision in seeking, searching, examining, watching, etc.

My point has been proven, Now I am finish with u. Go find somebody else to bother, but I guess in ur terms that would translate to harassment.

It's really been fun

[tjackson26]

@Meekzor

I see u type of bitch that like to put words in other peoples mouth and I didn't mention anything about oogling I said looked/glimpse, there is a huge difference. Use a damn dictionary, it will help u with some of the meanings of the words that u r using because I see u r living in bliss. (that is just me saying that u r ignorant, just in case u don't get it, like my original comment).

OOOH P.S. I did spread my STD to u, because u r my whore.

[tjackson26]

@Meekzor

Or maybe u are the only one that is the moron and narrow minded. If understanding natural attraction makes me narrow minded, I will be that. If you go back to the original comment. Your mate can be the most attractive woman or man in the world but it is human nature for a person to look. You can try to deny biology, anatomy and physiology but it is "human nature" . I don't care whether u respond to this or not, but in the end, it is what it is. Now go get laid, it seems like u need it.

[tjackson26]

@Meekzor

and u obviously can't read. Not at any point did I say "ALL" men or women, this a generalization of both men and women and the fact; that it is human nature for us to look or glimpse at someone that is attractive. There is a fine line between someone that catches a person attention for a couple of seconds vs being disrespectful. so if that makes me narrow minded, then ur response makes u a complete idiot. Now do u agree with that? (Let me answer that for u) of course u dont.

[AndrewKo1218]

Men will always look, but if you look good, act feminine, and keep us engaged, we will look more discretely.

[pchazard]

Typical female thinking, which of course, has no connection to real life. That's not why men look at other women. Men will look regardless. We like to see novel things - which means that if we're looking at other women, it has nothing to do with us not loving you, not liking you, etc. It's like being in an art museum - why look at only one painting? Even if you have a favorite painting, it doesn't mean you won't look at the others, and if you do, doesn't mean you want to take them home instead.

[shams025]

hi, he 1800s called and they want their attitude back. honestly, im not a feminist by any means but saying women have to make all the effort so that their HUSBAND.. not boyfriend or casual hookup wont neglect them to check out other women is asinine. y not be mature about it and just tell him? or u can do the same to him and see how he responds?

[davidgzmn12345]

@shams025 Lets turn it around, what would you rather see? Your boyfriend in his messy/dirty clothes (because, apparently, being married is a reason to stop caring about your appearance/making an effort to look good for your couple) or a well dressed guy walking down the street?

[lsesusan]

Disrespectful regardless. No excuse for men to be so obvious. Men will still look at other attractive women even their own spouse/love ones are attractive too. It's just not right for them to drool over another female. Just leave if it's that important to them that they disrespect their partners when they don't find them attractive anymore. I know many married men who are respectful towards their spouse even they do not dress up anymore, when other attractive female are around. It can be done.

[sashmuscle]

@lsesusan Disrespectful for your little pee brain to understand a inherit instinct? Your suggestion is to end a relationship because he looks at another women? You are a young kid with insecurities. Live a little then come back with a thoughtful argument.

[soleilangela]

no way, some men are respectful ..

[Filipina84]

Way before I watched this video for the first time, I always thought its because the guy found his lady so boring, plain looking (Vanilla), not lively or too coy. If those thingsm then why is he with her in the first place?

I'm a girl myself, but wondering about those other girls who doesn't have much going on wonder why their man looks at other women? My opinion, you're too vanilla. You don't give much that he'll go get it somewhere else. He doesn't care, as long as he gets it.

[HiV3R]

Funny how all the blame goes to the female, There are some men out there that have gorgeous partners and they still look to the side. Like some men that need to put their pecker inside every hole they can.

I agree that sometimes women do get lazy just like men and stop taking care of themselves. But for the female to make all the efforts into keeping him interested? If he's not interested by all means move on.

[hobeeorchid]

lets put this in the reverse, women can look at other men too. commitment doesnt mean we go blind and loose the drive to have go after the opposite sex. it means though that we control that urge because we love our partner. there, go put a thumbs down on that.

[HumanLuna]

I wouldn't blame the women just yet.

I bet there are lots of married women go on dates with their husbands with a babysitter at home watching the kids.

A woman doesn't have to wear makeup if she doesn't want to.

But the man shouldn't look at other people just because she doesn't (and vice versa). It's not an excuse or a valid reason to OBVIOUSLY STARE at other people.

[XXTheRealMcCoyXX]

Diana is a sensible woman; if it was just her alone on this channel I bet youtango would have a lot more subscribers...She just says it how it is!

If you cant handle the fact youre not the only person your partner finds attractive then thats your messed up issue and not theirs! Guys cant stand insecure needy women I just give them 3 warnings then dump them cause its more bother than its worth being with wommen like that, theres plenty fish in the sea anyway

[XXTheRealMcCoyXX]

Besides, its his eyes and he can look at what ever he damn likes No body tell you what you can look at do they? The man needs to tell her to shut up or find another weak ass man for her to control = /

[AlphaTeamLeader1]

This day and age, it seems like she should be happy that he isn't looking at other men. His looking at other women and still picking his current partner should be a re-affirmation to her that she is the one in his life.

[PineleafProductions]

That's a little rude.

[AlphaTeamLeader1]

Well, I did make two statements, and I will agree the first statement, though having some truth to it, is a bit rude. I do stand by the second statement and do not see it as being rude, but the truth.

Out of curiosity, and maybe I just don't get it, why are so many posters on you tube so rude that they just make insulting or degrading comments rather than discussing the issue?

[PineleafProductions]

Well, I didn't want to call you a homophobe because it didn't seem completely like that.. but I am VERY tired of people being arrogant & ignorant to homosexuals.

I do agree with you - i HATE how people are so insulting now-a-days. It's because behind a computer nobody knows who they are and can say whatever they like without getting in trouble. That's what I thought you were doing ;) Haha.

[bellacinderellakk]

i think it's messed up and one step away from cheating

[XXTheRealMcCoyXX]

oh thats original coming from a Twilight fan! = /

[amibbdos]

... she is jus saying its how u look.. thats all. wtf ppl gettin on like she said the woman cant bitch about it if she looks frumpy. if the man is a philanderer is a whole dif topic

[drossonvinyl]

Horrible advice. A women should not have to flaunt her body in novel ways to compete with other women for her HUSBAND's attention. This is a sexist notion. Furthermore, if I were married to Dr. Kirschner I would constantly be looking at other women, it wouldn't matter if she were butt-naked. So visuality doesn't have to be the key to a successful relationship. But if your man has an overtly wandering eye and you don't like it, then try not marrying a fucking dickhead in the first place.

[xtracrispy628]

I agree that a successful relationship doesn't solely depend on visual appeal. But by stating that you would constantly be looking at other women if you were married to Dr. Kirschner, you are acknowledging that visual appeal IS an important aspect. You may think that asking her to make a bit more effort is sexist, but from a practical standpoint, don't you think her extra efforts could possibly attract more attention from her husband? And isn't that what she ultimately wants? The advice is sound

[UFOHuntersHQ]

You make no sense what so ever.... what dose making an effort has to do with competing against other women... You think that just because you get married you can just drop the ball and not even try to retain the interests he ones had for you...I got news for you...Guys get bored!

[XXTheRealMcCoyXX]

Totally! It's like this: I love Pizza...It comes in a whole variety of topping and flavours... But dose that mean you want to have noting but Pizza for years on end? Of course not... You get constipated... Same thing happens with the women you seeing... Guys are getting mentally constipated by this ridiculous concept of monogamy and have zero skills with women in general they land up with the only women they think they can get and cheat on them a few years down the road. Its not healthy!

[r344]

Diana will probably bite the guys dick off.

[little73dude]

Look lady all she has to do is show some BOOBS! And if your husband is still staring at other women then SHOW YOUR BOOBS TO OTHER DUDES!

[Efferts]

This advisor sucks. Horribly. Dr Kirschner, piece of crap.

Okay, staring @ women? WHO CARES! If a broad has issues with an idle problem & intangible results, that makes her insecure. Being insecure, you're not ready for human relations.

Get over it!

[mssl07]

LEAVE HIS CRACK ASS

[asdfghjkl4355]

Why the hell did you say 'I do,' when he's been acting like this?.. no body's fault but yours for accepting an marriage where you can't even get your men straight and you start to rely on others to solve your damn problems!

[Prymis34]

From a dudes perspective... ur husbands a DICK. If he makes it blatantly obvious then he has no reguard for u or ur feelings. Of course I do it from time 2 time, but its a habitual thing and I dont it 2 where its obvious and I dont do it all the time

[Bellonikka]

I agree.

[meka4996]

You are absolutely right ON! As a man, I have absolutely no interest in women in sweat shirt, jeans/pants, no make up, not feminine, not motherly or not family oriented[career oriented].

If women don't put themselves under their men, it's just constant fighting and arguing, who is going to compromise FIRST, huh?? Equality doesn't tell you that, huh?? any relationship will fail this way...

[courtneyliu]

I agree with her. It would be naive to believe that your husband will still feel the hots for you after seeing you wearing the same outfits. We're naturally attracted to beautiful things. You can make the man stay, but you can't stop his mind from wandering. The same is valid for women.

[xngaaax]

ooh, i get it now! even though you're in a serious committing marriage, you cant relax in front of your own partner. i mean you're wearing your comfortable clothes because you feel that you can relax in front of your partnet BUT it is excusable to let your partner look at other people. i mean who told you to relax and breath. you're in a relationship where you need to constantly dress up for him. one slip and you cant blame him for checking other people out, right?

[xtracrispy628]

Wrong. No one is telling her to look attractive 24/7 to COMPLETELY prevent her husband's eyes from wandering (THAT can only be achieved by eye-gouging). She just wants bit more attention from her man. I think Diana's advice of flirting/dressing attractively could help. There are no absolutes. He's still allowed to look, and she's still allowed to relax. They will just need to find an acceptable balance on the extend at which they do them.

[sergio72692]

the only part that i agree with is the part about looking interesting women shoudlnt stop dressing up for men just cause theyre married on the rest this lady is really wrong and i dont know why they still have her biology? what are we still wild animals liveing off of instinct? we as men should respect women especially if we marry and if we dont like being with someone you should drop it and not carry on and possibly hurt someone even more

[maliayang]

you shouldn't have to do anything for your man to stop looking at other women

[IDontDoDrumCovers]

ugh she talks through her teeth its so annoying

[tjackson26]

even if ur girl is rocking the sweats and her hair up in a ponytail, u dont stare at another female. that's bullshit. same applies to ladies, if ur man is rocking the sweats or his favorite pair of jeans that u hate, that dont mean to stare at the young man in the business suit. (this does not apply to all scenarios). it's ok to look and go back to what u r doing. ur mate should be secure in themselves to know u r not going anywhere, especially if the sex is GREAT!!!

[tjackson26]

here's the bottom line to all the back and forth comments. men will look regardless of how beautiful, attractive, and sexy u r. it is a man thing, deal with. same applies to women, we look if a guy is nice, neat and handsome. (ladies dont even try it) but there is a thing called respect, its 1 thing to look while ur mate is around, its another to snatch ur neck around and stare like DAAAaaaaaammmn!!!! that is a complete lack of respect toward ur girl or man.

[snaildragon]

@tjackson26

I believe looking lustfully at people other than one's partner is always disrespectful regardless of how obvious a person is about it, or whether the partner is present. Saying "it is a man thing, deal with.[sic]" is a sexist statement. I know men who are not like that, and I believe women have every right to be upset when their partners cheat on them by having lustful thoughts about other women. 

[kyeruu2]

you're complaining because your husband looks at other women too much?

Selfish aren't you?

it's impossible to keep yourself from looking at other women.

biologically, if we see better dressed women or doing anything, we're going to stare because it's sexually attractive, it has nothing to do with "HE NEGLECTS ME TO LOOK AT OTHER WOMEN"

drop the girl logic. And let it go.

Why would he marry you if he didn't find YOU more interesting?

durr

[EvilPaola]

Of course. But the man shouldn't stare so obviously then, and you can't expect the woman to always look her best enough to keep his attention. It makes relationships harder when the man loves women.

[kyeruu2]

Why not? i don't see a book that says i have to act in a certain way around my "wife" because it is so.

Morals and ideals is the reason we have a corrupt government, (example)

[cybercab]

I'd have to disagree. I'm a dude, but even I would say there is no excuse for men acting like this. The speaker is blaming the girl! Her only mistake might be that she picked a loser. A true man loves his wife and is faithful in intent and action. When we lower the standards to allow men to act like this then you can pretty much guess what the results will be.

[javonpryce]

I agree with you too. I've been in relationships where I've thought about being other girls and I've also been in relationships where the thought of being with someone else never even crossed my mind. Why? Because my relationship at that time wasnt lacking in anything. So all I'm saying is... dont try to say that men look at other women because they cant help it. If a man's eyes is straying it is for a reason.

[the21stdragon]

I half agree with you. I don't think that men have any excuse to run astray but at the same time I agree that a woman should not discontinue trying to look beautiful, flirting, or carrying on with her man just because she has him. Those were the things that caught his interest in the first place so why throw out what you already know works? Guys, be good...ladies, don't get lazy, to continue doing the things that caught his eye in the first place the best you can.

[kyeruu2]

Because morals in relationships ruin it.

[Nanceify]

@cybercab

Well said cybercab, I agree. A true man who loves his girl acts faithfully.

[Nanceify]

A man who checks out other women does not have respect for his woman. Faithfulness comes from within and it's all about respecting and loving the person you are with.

[94an]

@cybercab Agreed on that!

[kangryh]

why is she back! hmmph! >:(

[javonpryce]

She's back because she's more qualified to give advice

[4nything]

@kangryh yea she's the worst person to take advice from !!!!!

[kevtech733]

good add...

[matman16]

Really it's a question of retaining his attention, some of her advice was alright. Still, if she starts to make the effort and get the relationship going again and the guy doesn't change her ways, whether it's within the realms of normality or not, if she's uncomfortable with it and couldn't feel properly settled down whilst the guy was acting like that, she should look to end it, as it's only wasting time.

[pynkz]

well i think this is the answer ppl get by asking questions that are so vague.

[MaicoMoon]

I bet he looks at porn too.

[superkagome]

I can see what Diana's saying. But really the guy needs to work on his ninja skills. Look, but don't let her see.

[pynkz]

HAHA

Lol makes sense

[mylifeinrome7]

this was really a stupid answer Dr..this is not a hater comment its just my common sense...bye

[mylifeinrome7]

OMG what if she is ok? you only answered in the case the woman was not taking care of herself, what about if the woman is fine and the husband is looking to others in that way?? Dr Diana please be serious, what kind of answer is this? there's so much more to take in consideration...

[joeyjojo864]

i think she gave a valid answer. Women tend to let themselves go after marriage which is why men look at something else. though i think she should of acknowledged the other side of the coin of him being a jerk.

[pintobeans77]

Why is she blaming the woman and insinuating that she's the jerk? This is false as I have been through this and I was never a slob. Yes, men are visual, and if they're going to look, they are going to look regardless of how YOU look.

[ikb01]

thanks :) i loved it

[dacrunch]

what a dumb bitch

[Killiean10]

Get RID of this woman!

[Mzero00x]

stupid answer.. very stupid answer

[nlcorke]

I cannot believe a person with a PhD would give advice like this. You don't have to be a feminist to see that this answer was offensive. Their problem may not have anything to do with what she's wearing. It's not biology. I really hope no one follows her advice!

[Indigjudgement]

okay how was her answer offensive?

[nlcorke]

She's completely avoiding the problem by saying the woman should dress differently- like it's the woman's fault when really there could be something going on in their relationship deeper than that. It's ridiculous! Overall she's assuming the woman is dressing a certain way and the issue has nothing to do with how she dresses. Couldn't you pick up on this? Other people who have commented have.

[javonpryce]

Because if a man's eyes stray its because the relationship he's in is lacking on something. I'm a guy, you dont have to take her word alone for it. Just ask a bunch of random guys and see if they dont agree. Here's a proverb... if you feed your dogs they wont go to someone else's house to eat.

[4nything]

@javonpryce i dnt agree but thts me, i neva look at other women when my gf is with me. cos i love her !

[javonpryce]

Yeah but do you avoid looking at other women because you really dont find them interesting or do you avoid looking at them out of respect for your girl?

[davidgzmn12345]

Yeah, theres another one that goes

"it doesnt matter where you get your appetite, as long as you come home to eat"

[Knowalott2]

@davidgzmn12345 disgusting, we're not FOOD.

women aren't cattle. What distinguishes a human from an animal is his/her ability to control him/herself..

[davidgzmn12345]

@Knowalott2 OK, i guess your not familiar with the way metaphors work, so ill explain.

what i meant was, if hes just looking, but not cheating on her, sleeping around, etc, then whats the matter? He loves her, does she really needs to be the only focus of his attention in order to realize that?Now, if he was cheating on her or sleeping around then i wouldnt defend him, but if hes just looking i dont see a problem.

[Reyelee]

@Knowalott2 You're comment "I'm not a feminist by any means" is laughable. Look up the definition of feminist. You make it sound like a dirty word, but your statement implies that you are one. It's not a bad thing. It doesn't mean that you are anti man. It just means you demand respect for yourself as a female AND as a person. Not everyone feels that the two are synonomous. Hence feminism.

[Indigjudgement]

You misunderstood the lady. She's giving the woman advice on what to do if she wants her husband to check her out instead, such as dress sexy, flirt with him, etc. shes not assuming anything. watch the video again, like she says guys are visual creatures. we like to look.

[THFMDA]

In life, there will always be a better looking woman then your current wife/gf. Or vice versa. Some human beings are more appealing then others and we will look. It's normal, people need to stop being clingy.

[flowingover]

i agree to the answer but he is a jerk. we always make these excuses for men, he shouldnt be looking at other women.