Added: 2 years ago
From: lauriekilmartin16
Views: 9,537
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  • Great stuff Laurie! Can't wait for you to come back to Seattle!

  • This audience is lame. Too bad because she is very funny.

  • i just saw her on conan and boy was i suprised! awesome!

  • So good! Abortions jokes. <3

  • "he has a tattoo on his neck" fucking hilarious, Laurie.

  • I believe the 99th Abstruse Goose addresses why men have such tragically simple responses when asked what they are thinking. I would link to it but I'm pretty sure youtube would have me hunted down and then promptly shot for spamming their pristine social-cyber-comment-space.

  • lol got in trouble today because a saw this fat classmate of mine crying and asked if he had an abortion and he just yelled "SHUT THE FUCK UP!" got a detention obviously, but when the teacher asked how i could joke about abortion like that i just said "i just dont care"

  • Hey everyone! I have a Facebook Fanpage now-- look me up. Check out my CD "Five Minutes to Myself" on itunes and Amazon. Thanks for all the support.

  • You're 43? Rrrroww. Be still, my beating heart.

  • You should have your own show and get paid millions.

  • @ Laurie: Am I impotent? No, my friend. What has impotence to do with taking a moral stand against unnecessarily sick jokes? Do only macho, virile guys laugh at your filthiness? Wow, that's something to be proud of. Your cheap shot retorts only reveal the darkness and emptiness in your soul. All comedians are hurting. Be honest with yourself and you won't have to lash out at others. As for the fans you've accumulated here, they'll be great companions in hell.

  • @1skinnyguy Don't you think you're a little old for imaginary friends and imaginary play dates?

    @Laurie, I saw you on Conan, I love your stuff. Seriously, your "filthiness" is hilarious and I just love how you be controversial without being apologetic...You won me at "life's about learning from your mistake." You're brilliant and you should post more of your material :D

  • "Life's about learning from your mistake." LMFAO! I love your sick sense of humor and I LOVE your abortion jokes! It's great to see someone unafraid to make jokes about the subject!

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  • "avoid the fertility clinic and go straight to a landscaping company."

    Classic!

  • @1skinnyguy you seem impotent. Am I sort of right, or completely right?

  • @lauriekilmartin16 You nailed it!...

    oh well at least he can say that happened for him at least once in his lifetime.

  • @1skinnyguy Dude once that you have pull out of you body something the size of a watermelon trough something the size of a lemon then you can say who's business is being a mother and also IF you had 2 brain cells you'll know that this is how she makes a living and provides for her kid. But I get that is a big IF. And FYI we all moms say crap like that, just most of us won't say it in public.

  • @1skinnyguy Well, since there is no such thing as god, she has nothing to worry about.

    She's a comedian, she tells jokes. And she is hilarious. Go be negative somewhere else!

  • "let me throw him out the window." lol

  • wow why aren't you famous!!!!!!!!!!!! your amazing

  • @killerfriend94 Thanks Killer!

  • She reminds me of Chelsea handler

  • Good luck on Last Comic Standing!

  • @bs13690 Thank you BS!

  • lmfao. The baby out the window bit was hilarious. "You're tired, you could hit the wall, then we'll have to raise a moron". amazing.

  • @doda Thanks Doda, luckily the baby survived his infancy.

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  • Landscaping company...

  • She is one of the best comedians i've seen in a while. I understand that "la raza" look because I get it sometimes; you think I'm thinking about the new Arizona law, but I'm actually thinking, "Should I jerk-off now, or after I get high."

  • @rulyruly7 exactly they look good when they're serious.

  • That was so Funny!!!

  • very funny!!

  • terrible audience, hilarious stuff. she's actually funny..!

  • man you rock!!

  • Oh my god this lady is fantastic!

    She's at least as funny as many male comedians.

  • that's the most backhanded comment i've ever read.

  • it's true, it wasn't necessary. but it's ambiguous; it's not actually a put-down. i do really love this chick, she's one of my favourite stand-ups.

    tell me, what do you think? if you smack a lady in the face for no other reason than her sheer beauty, does that count as a back-handed compliment, or is that just domestic violence?

  • you, sir, have stumbled upon quite the quandary.

  • "I only tell abortion jokes because I'm fantasizing." I'm now a fan.

  • Ha. If that's the joke that sells you on me, we will be friends forever.

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