Added: 1 year ago
From: OhCurt
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  • @OhCurt

    Ciao Bello!

    Curt "Amico Mio"! Though you and I are contemporaries, I was out slightly earlier than you however, that doesn't make Bobby Griffiths' (Prayers for Bobby) old lover/boyfriend "Blaine" here, any less proud of you! In fact that you have, as do I all that "History" to share with younger folks, embarking on the process themselves increases my "Pride" in you by multiples!

    Blaine

  • well, the endless coming out is necessary because of the endless ignorance surrounding us! and the endless messages (idden or explicit) trying to make you invisible. If they see you, they'll have to cope with the idea that all that suffering for fitting in and survive was unnecessary. And you are bigger than their behavior-controlling giant and bigger than all the stupid sacrifices and denials they have done. So they must make you invisible or they'll see their meaningless pain.

  • Sorry about my mistake. It is GLAAD as you know. Embarrassing. Result of trying to type too fast. Regarding MAKING LOVE, I checked an old storage box, and there it was. Watched it again last night.. Re-feel in love with MO. The film made me realize never to tell another guy that I loved him too soon.

  • Curt--ATTENTION--On Dec.7, Sundance Channel will begin airing a series called GIRLS WHO LIKE BOYS WHO LIKE BOYS. Sounds fun. Already garnered a GLLAD nomination. Google has the information.

  • @tahoemack Thanks for the heads up. Just the title alone is WIN.

    :-)

  • Coming out is an ongoing process. I got a kick out of you liking MAKING LOVE. I may have watched it more than you. I really liked MO. I learned from that film not to tell someone that you love them right away, On another blog I liked the guy's comment that it is more difficult to stay in the closet than it is coming out.

  • @OhCurt

    Ciao Bello Curt!

    What a great video and incredible story. What strikes me most about it though,

    is just how universal it is! I too remember being a 16yr old in a dark crowded

    theater to see "Making Love"! I came out to my mother just before my 16th

    birthday, she couldn't handle it and flew with me to Northern California, where

    she was delivering me to my father.

  • @OhCurt

    While ordering lunch in a cafe a very cute

    young server was sending me the signals, unbeknownst to my folks! I wouldn't

    actually meet this young man for another year. He cruised me on an empty

    BART train and introduced himself as Bobby Griffith(Prayers for Bobby) I was

    still in school, but my dear father would allow Bobby to stay at our place

    on the weekends, especially when things weren't so good at home! I amazes me

    to reflect on just what a different time it was!

  • @OhCurt

    You and Sandy are darling in that

    old "Camp" photo of yours. You both look like you could be members of the

    "Brat Pack"! Fom a cute young boy, to a handsome, well adjusted grown man

    you've become it's inspiring. I believe it important, and pardon the cliche, to

    share both our tragedies and triumphs with these brave younger people coming out!

    The paradigm shift in thought and attitude today, from what it was is breathtaking!

    Thank you sharing your story!

    Blaine

  • OMG!! Great vid Curt YOU are AWESOME!! I especially like the part about how coming out is an ongoing process. Yours truly has been out since '91..COMPLETELY out at work and in life. We recently hired a new guy at work.. He said to me.."you keep talking about this guy named Dave.."..Here we go again. I said.."well..Dave is my partner..I am gay and he is my partner." Straight people don't have to that. The guy said.."oh..cool.(You gotta love those 20 somethings!) ..never ends..

  • @stoner829 Thanks!

    And congrats on 19 years!

    :-)

    That workplace scenario is one I can relate to. It's situations like these that prove that it does need to come up as its own topic sometimes. Good that his reaction skewed toward the positive/supportive.

  • I must say you seem very straight-acting (I hate that term) a stranger would never guess you're gay unless you told them.

  • @separatesix From what I can tell, that term (agreed, it's pretty silly) varies by definition from one person to the next. Some have acted like this was a surprise with me, others have had the "well DUH" reaction/response.

  • This was awesome. We all need to share our life stories with someone...or more than one someone. It's good for us...and for those that are willing to listen.

  • @kcgirlgeek Exactly!

    The more voices that are heard when it comes to stuff like this, the better.

  • interesting story, thanks for sharing :)

  • @ieurope Thanks for sitting through it. :-)

  • Thanks for this story.

  • Please continue .

    I`m new to your channel,I do also enjoy depfox.

    And Jim Of countrycomestotown.

    I think I`m some what like you ,asking questions about it all.

    And Smart enough to Stay Happy as possible !

  • @OKflaMAN Thanks for watching AND for the encouragement. Depfox & CCTT are all good guys, I'm glad you found their channels.

  • great video.....thanks for sharing that...

  • @timecentre Thanks for sitting through it. :-)

  • Kept meaning to click on this but kept getting caught up. Glad a finally did! Thanks for sharing, Curt! I hope we someday meet IRL. You're still one of my favorite vloggers -- despite you ruining vanilla ice-cream for me.

  • @Gimmeaflakeman Thanks, Victor!

    (still not apologizing for the ice cream thing... those lulz are still mine and I ain't givin 'em back, yo!!!1!)

    Man, I've been terribly neglectful of this comment section. Mostly it's because I'm touched by the positive words back.  Hopefully anyone reading this knows that I didn't intentionally ignore anyone. I was just left a little "speechless" is all.

    In a good way.

  • Look at you on a mountaintop, shouting to the world! Who'da thunk? I can't even imagine the stress of this situation--I was nervous telling my Dad I was ready to date boys! Happy anniversary, and continued success with the 'process'. You are very wise in the way you express yourself, and I know this will be a help to others. BTW, I was waiting for the naked mountain diving--WTF?

  • @trillian57 LOL, nah... if only I'd had THAT much nerve to jump naked into it.

    Thanks for watching and leaving word. Always nice to see you swing through here in Tubeland.

  • A beautiful (and inspiring) story and advice - You were way ahead of your time!

    BTW - Agnostics can be just as spiritual as anyone else. :)

  • @dl737 Danny, I had no concept of being ahead of anything or anyone. I was so winging it the entire time. LOL

    Congrats again on your own big adventure coming up. That's fantastic news. Hope the move produces lots of good things for you and the fam-damily.

    :-)

  • Nice story Curt. It seems every day that we can find some little tidbit to be grateful for. Today I'm just grateful that you decided to turn the camera off before you got naked and dove into the trees. How'd that work out by the way?

  • @NBMonkey HA! Well... in that regard it turns out I was all talk.

    ;-P

    Thanks, dude. Whatever there is in these personal tales of mine that others can draw from, so be it.

  • It's videos like this that keep me coming back to youtube.

  • @CrappyCartoons Thank you!

    :-)

  • Great story. Some people don't realize it is a process. I remember seeing that movie when I was a kid.

  • we all love u curt *_*

    keep goin. <3

  • @frequency1993 Thanks for that!!

  • @OhCurt

    I thank u for ur awesome videos. They make me smiling everytime I watch them! Pretty much like 'happy-day-videos-from-OhCurt' :) <3

  • It's striking that you didn't mention your father's reaction. Was he alive?

  • @audionautix Dad's reaction... that's a whole other vlog. LOL

    Yeah, he was alive but my folks divorced when I was 9 so he was remarried and off tending to other things. I finally came out to my step-mom and him in 1987.

    His reaction was mixed, but not angry or violent (which makes me fortunate compared to a lot of people, sadly).

  • Great video Curtdra-thank you for sharing this with the world. I knew most of this story but never had all the pieces in one spot. I don't know if I fall into the people you mentioned who say I don't have to say "I'm heterosexual", for me it's never been a big deal except on a discrimination & human rights level. When I was little one of my friends had 2 moms and as a teenager my parents were friends with a gay couple so to me it's no big deal - it is just another part of you, like Rhoda.

  • @DogNation13 @DogNation13 On the descrimination/rights level, YES, it most definitely matters just like you said. I don't miss the days of thinking constantly that it mattered in the other ways. There are actually moments when I'm around new people where suddenly I realize they've assumed I'm heterosexual and THEN it's like a bizarre reminder. Rarely, though, does it ever turn into an uncomfortable scenario, so that must mean I'm lucking out when it comes to meeting new people.

  • I am moved by your story, Curt. I related so much to your experience coming out to your Mom. It took a little while for my Mom to "come out" too, where she could comfortably share with her loved ones the story of her gay son. I hope this story of encouragement reaches a soul at this pivotal moment in their lives and provides comfort for them.

  • @Sandguy99 Mom's have a special challenge presented to them when it comes to these things. Figuring that out is part of our own learning experience, I guess.

    Ditto on the sentiment of hoping this does that kind of good. Feels sorta silly that it took me this long to figure out that it COULD possibly have that kind of value here. Wasn't sure there was a big necessity for me to share this one.

    Sometimes I need you folks to help me expand my own POV.

    :-)

  • You know, years ago in the 90's I saw "The Life and TImes Of Harvey Milk" which is now on Hulu. Not the film with Sean Penn, but the real life documentary. One has to see that before seeing "Milk". It was so inspiring for me to see how he led folks in the Castro district and helped them become free. What a man!

    I love your introspective stories. The story of so many, and the courage of the few.

  • @johnreagannumber1 I'm glad that documentary is available online - kick ass!

    I caught that one several years ago and found myself bawling like a baby towards the end... so I can only imagine how I'll be when I finally sit down in front of that Sean Penn flick. lol

    Thanks for this and the other video comments, John. Sorry it took me a few days to respond to them.

    And to repeat myself, it's great seeing you back here on the 'Tubes!

  • Wow! That was quite a story. Thanks for sharing it man. As you told it, I was thinking back to 1985 and that general era and I would have to say that it must have been very scary to come out back then. I'm not sure that it would be a whole lot easier now when it comes to family but the general public have excepted it more now than it had back then.

  • @Sugartalker A few years ago, I was reminded how even my mind set has changed since back then and I really never had anything against homosexuality. In fact, one of the most amazing people I ever met and had a huge impact on my life was gay. But I digress. Remember Eddie Murphys Delirious? It was all the rage in the 80s right? I remember watching it many many times anf laughing my ass off at it. But...

  • @Sugartalker But hen about 20 plus years go by without watching it and with fond memories I decide to rent it and watch it again. Not really remembering the gay jokes in that concert, I found it offensive and had a hrad time watching those parts. It's strange how I can't imagine now how I found that funny back then.

  • @Sugartalker Ah yes... I remember that routine. My freshman year of high school, it seemed that every male peer I had was quoting that stuff. This coincided with my own private realizations, too... though I don't remember feeling offended by it nearly as much as I thought Eddie Murphy was probably just hiding something by joking that way. LOL

    Summer of 1985 - Rock Hudson was all over the news thanks to his AIDS battle getting out. Not the most festive backdrop, but it didn't stop me either.

  • Great story Curt. Although it's a tragic loss for petite blonde females everywhere:)

  • @Blinkazoid

    Man, I wish more good looking guys like Curt were gay! Less competition!

  • this should have a million views and you should have a tv special abt your coming out or actually being free in other words

  • You have to be one of the most genuine people on here. It really is a breath of fresh air when you're lucky enough to run into people like you. You're awesome, Curt!

  • Bob was cute. ;-)

  • Also, never jump into pine trees naked. Trust me. :)

  • As the mom of a sick kid, I know Shoulder Stress extremely well. I have learned to make friends with her, because she ain't going away. I can't imagine how so many people still live in the closet with her. Glad you broke that friendship early on, because she's a bitch. But don't tell her I said that.

  • I cant remember what movie it was, but maybe it was Making Love... where one guy walks up behind a guy sitting on the sofa and puts his arm around his neck and hugs him from behind. I don't know why that was such an incredible turn on to me when I was young, I can't possible be a gay man. Don't know what it means, but it seems like the place come out about it. I have only dated one bi guy, but I seem to attract all sorts of a-sexual men. Which sucks, since I am still a fan of the sausage.

  • this video is brilliant i subbed really liked the pictures

  • Thank you for sharing this, Curt. No, I don't like people shouting it out, because I feel there is a normal person who is straight or gay, just a normal person, nothing special, and they don't need to announce it. This is different from sharing, which is what you are doing. I wanted to hear your sharing on your journey. I am amazed that the other kids in the camp were so accepting, because kids can be very cruel. You're braver than I could ever be.

  • Coming out sounds like a mixture of fear, relief, and growth. Thanks for vlogging like this Curt, it's encouraging. Congrats and Cheers.

  • I love you, Curt. :)

  • Hey Curt ... we connected for a minute a while back when you had visited Diana in NYC. This is an AWESOME contribution, and I was glad to see it. It's stories like yours and mine and others that are going to bring far more changes to this society than about anything else. When people KNOW US .. they may take a second look and question their anti-gay feelings. Good to see you still "at it", Curt!!!!

  • @LifterWill Hi Will - YES, I remember you. And I apologize for dropping the ball with the emails. As a pen pal, I provide mostly disappointment anymore. Sorry!

    Yes, sometimes the best way to penetrate that prejudice/misconception is to just show up and be yourself. I didn't know until after the fact that this is exactly what I wound up doing for some people. And yet I always felt self conscious for not going out and carrying protest signs more often - Go figure!

  • @OhCurt Curt, never a need to apologize. I'm not such a good "pen pal" either. It's always just nice to see your videos and know that we share some good common views. "Show up and ... BE" .. Good truth to remember. Good to see you .. and thanks for the response. By the way, you already know that Being who you are says a whole lot more to those around you than simply carrying a protest sign.

  • Nobody said "well, duh"? ;)

    Stories like this don't need a point - the sharing is valuable in and of itself.

  • @AngryAussie LOL, well actually I did get a couple of "well duh" responses from friends. One female cohort I told during my senior year of high school replied with, "great - now we can have a sleep over!"

    There were also a couple of "It's about time you told me!" reactions. lol

  • Thank you so much for sharing yer coming out story Curt. Congrads to yer 25th wow! I cant wait to get to my 25th!

  • Now I know where the twisty road vid came from! I don't know how I missed this one, but I did, until now.

    Thanks so much for sharing your experience, Curt. I too had 'Making Love' on VHS. It wasn't even a particularly good film, but the subject matter made it very re-watchable for those of us that were hungry for something - hell for anything which tallied with our own feelings! It was a barren time for finding positive images of anything gay. But we made it through, and continue to do so. :-)

  • By the way, you know why I bought 'Making Love'? It wasn't just the gay storyline. I wanted to see more of Harry Hamlin, after seeing him as Perseus in 1981's Clash of the Titans! Phwooar! :-)

  • This is probably the best vlog I've watched in a long time.  So satisfying. Thank you.

  • being honest with yourself is one of the hardest things you will ever do and makes it so much easier to be honest with others. its one of the reasons i like your vids curt.

  • I except gay poeple, but i do not understand other's do not exept it.

  • 25 years... time flies, don't it? I was going to tease you about your socks at 3:30 in the vlog, but I thought better of it. Heh. You rock, Curt! Thanks for sharing! Yayy!!!

  • Great vlog, well told. But if you decide to run nekid through that brush, don't say I didn't warn you about the dear ticks. 

  • You sure were pretty back then!! (and still are)  Great story! I remember coming out to my best girlfriend somewhere in my early twenties and after a moment of silence she looked at me and said "Steve! That's like telling me your shoe size!" After that, I came out to everybody and my life resumed as if nothing had changed. I don't shout my sexuality to the world, but I never hide it either. -Steve-

  • GRRRR, I had the perfect comment all typed out and the shiny new subscription bar shipped me off to another vid. Here is the Readers Digest version:

    I wore "Making Love" out!

    It took my shrink an hour to get me to say the words and 3 years to say them to my parents.

    Amen and big hell yeah on the advice! HUGS!

  • @1DRock37167 Yeah, that new feature pretty much bites the big one at the moment. LOL - it keeps arguing with me over my choice to not automatically advance.

    LOL @ wearing the tape out. Can you imagine what each of us would have done with an episode of Queer As Folk within reach?

    :-D

    (((D)))

  • @OhCurt QAF would have melted my little small town brain back then:-)

  • @1DRock37167 LMAO!

    Yeah, same goes for my lil suburban noggin'.

  • What a great video, Curt! 

  • That was a great story, you are one of the most comfortable with his self person I've ever met, and that was a very inspiring speech :)

    Your friend looked like Molly Rignwald and you like Ralph Macchio lol and lastly you are just looking for an excuse to get naked!! lol

  • Bob was pretty smart to give you the opportunity to take that first step in a uniquely safe environment. I bet not many get that kind of chance. I imagine it was still difficult though.

  • Great video Curt & well done for telling your story. I'm sure it will inspire others to do the same.

    That's a great vlogging location too. Woods & beaches always bring the vlogger out in me :)

  • O M Goodness.. You are the cutest kid ever!!!!!!!!

    I truly enjoyed this video. What a beautiful story. Thank you so very much for sharing it.

    I feel like when a heterosexual asks why do we have to say that we're gay, they aren't looking at themselves. I often want to say back, how many times a day do you openly refer to your husband/wife. This is openly talking about your sexuality too.

    Can I hug you?

  • Sad, you wouldn't have dated me because I'm a brunette. I only dated boys with long hair. hmmmm

  • Great video! I cannot imagine the struggle of being a young homosexual in a heterosexual world. Fortunately times have changed...but I think there´s still A LOT of catching up to do...from BOTH sides actually.

    Maximum respect to you.

    And the forrest is amazing! Although I kind of miss the beach noises in your videos. :) Be lucky!

  • What a FANTASTIC video Curt!! It was great to officially hear your story. Wow, 25 years! And yeah, it would be nice if we all had equal footing because then we wouldn't have to be talking about it all the time. But, until the time that we all have the same rights legally and whatnot, we have to keep pressing forward for basic civil rights. So, Curt.....you think I'm one of those "shout it from the mountaintop" girls?...heheheh ((((((CURT))))))

  • I will support him in anyway he decides to live.... but I'm encouraging him to come out and be proud =) But it's not my decision to make but I was relieved after 2hrs of talking that he felt comfortable enough to share his awesome life with me. To you Wyatt, I love you man! SmileyD

  • I was completely moved by your story...what an excellent story...and your friend Sandy is just adorable... Almost reminded me of Molly Ringwald .... I just had the longest conversation with a HS friend who came out to me last night via Facebook. He was sooo worried about my reaction and I was reassuring him that I wanted him to live his true authentic self with me and the world. He doesn't live openly and that makes me kinda sad in this day and age. I told him I love him dearly & - SmileyD

  • For those who wonder why we talk about being gay, I point out it's largely because we can’t “show” we’re gay. Many str8s don’t want to see us do in public when they do without a thought, i.e. kiss, hold hands, etc. Many don’t care to hear about our daily lives, even when our lives are a parallel to their own. If we mention our relationships, if we do any of those subtle things that str8s do on minute by minute basis, we are suddenly “hitting ‘them’ over the head with our lifestyle.”

  • @Perroquet51 Hear Hear!

  • fabulous video in glad you came out and i hope your doing well

  • Great vid,thanks for sharing your story....Keep on keepin on!...Smiles!

  • GREAT SHARE!!!

  • Interesting video Curt - I suppose parents think there is a "cure" for everything!

    Anyway in my book you wouldn't be OhCurt if you were straight so thank goodness you became who you are

  • Curt, you should submit this to the life in a day project., that is if this is something that you would want on the big screen. But it's a terrific slice of life on the planet, and a poignant/inspirational occasion to share.

    how detrimental stress and anxiety is for the human body and spirit.

  • @LeSaMilano I SECOND THIS COMMENT!

  • @MeanBlackDude

    Third!

  • @LeSaMilano Thanks, Lesley.

    BTW, it's taking me longer to pull my head outta my ass to comment back to everyone here... oy.

    I thought about that "Life in a day" thing for about half a minute, actually. 25 yrs ago it never occurred to me that I'd even be sharing this part of my story on THIS level. Anything more didn't feel necessary - especially given the shape of the comments here.

    Wow.

    In a good way.

    :-)

    xoxo

  • I'm glad you shared this with us. :)

  • Thank you for sharing this! I lthink you're fantastic. And yes, coming out is a process and you really never stop (new jobs, new friends, etc etc). <3

  • The point is that your story will help others. Well done!

  • Great life story!

    You are truly one of the greatest vloggers/speakers on the tube!

    Always awesome vids!!!!

  • Damn I lost my comment after the video switched. For someone to be open tp being gay in the 80's is pretty big.

  • I wonder, why was it easier on you to come out to the group and not to sandy first?

  • you are a very lucky and blessed man

  • I so remember that movie. Thanks for sharing your story, Curt :)

  • Everyone has their own experience. Personally I tend to think of it as a private one only to be re-shared among close friends and family. Then again there are people who are isolated and need to hear it in a public forum like this from someone who's experienced it.

  • My son Quinn has discovered he is gay. I'm gladi it only took him a few months to come out with it. I'm proud of him. The genetic foundation for it probably came from his mother's side of the family as three out of the four siblings "seem" to be gay. Quinn is lucky as he is surrounded by other kids who are very open to alternative lifestyles. I think parents should make their children understand that they should make sure their kids know they love them unconditionally.

  • Wow. Your words and scenery.

  • Also, I wanted to say that the scenery there is just spectacular. I know that you must be happy to be there and I really hope you find a great job a great new start there, Curt!

  • Wow, 25 years ago. In a lot of ways that was such a different time and in some ways it's not that different today. But, it's amazing that you figured it out that early and probably made your life much easier because you did. I wonder if we'll get to a point, in our lifetime, where it's not important and not necessary to say what your sexual preference is. I think we're inching toward that point but we're a long way from being there. Great video Curt. People need to hear these stories! -Jim

  • Thank you for sharing :)

  • Thanks for sharing your story, Curt! Sometimes stresses in life can manifest as physical pain. I think it's better to release that stress and to be who you are and not pretend to be someone else just for the sake of society. I hope talking about it helps.

  • Thanks Curt.

  • I dont say it often enough... But I'm very happy & proud that we are friends.

    Great story Curt... Thanks for sharing (((hug)))

  • Thanks for sharing your story Curt. It must be really stressfull to have to keep such a big secret when your growing up.

    I remember my brother calling me from college when he was 22 and crying telling me he had to tell me something.....it was really hard for him to come out to his family.

    There is a lot to say on this subject.

    Wow do you live in a beautiful area. I would love to live near that.

    Hugs

    Lauren

  • Thanks fo sharing that Curt! You were a strong young man who's grown into a well rounded cool guy! Well. except for those weird quirks of yours... ;-)

  • Somethings just are...:-) Great story, Curt! If people paid more attention to the pains in their bodies and what it might mean on a deeper level, I think we'd all be happier and healthier. Funny how emotional/mental pain can quickly turn into physical pain. I guess that pain has to manifest itself somewhere being a constant thought and FORCE us to deal with our "issues"...:-)

    BEAUTIFUL views from there! Did you move and I missed it??

  • Thanks for sharing. I could listen to the way you tell stories all day. Loved the Tears for Fears reference. What a great song in general and for that moment in particular.

    There's just one thing....... I thought you were into washing machines.

  • Great video ..Thanks for sharing I hope it helps others..:+)

  • hey now

  • @kidblood1 you're an All Star, get your game on - go play

    Hey now you're a Rock Star, get the show on - get paid

  • I'm so glad you moved. There's nothing like a little nature to really hit the reset button.

  • beautiful curt. i hope the kids who need to hear this are listening.

  • YouTube's new app just erased my comment as it moved to the next video...

    '85 was a tricky and unsettling time. I guess that lasted a while.

    Being who you are is always the better option, but it's a challenge and really forces us to muster the courage to confront ourselves and others.

  • Cool coming out story Curt, thanks for sharing.

  • :)

    <3

    S.

  • Thanks for sharing your story. It reminds me of the Frank Zappa song "You are what you is".

  • There is so much I want to say to you Curt & I pray that one day we will actually meet in person so that we can chat. For now though, I am so proud to call you my friend. I love you. Chris

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