My partner of 18 years and father of my daughter did these things all the time. :( Both men and women can be a narcissists. What a horrible way to be. What a horrible way to live. Are you being brainwashed for loving someone? I was.
James, when this is at it's start, you will notice very long pauses before response. Then when the response comes, it's uncanny how irrelevant to what you said is. The whole point of this is to take you away from your thought process and at the end of the discussion, if she allows it to happen, she can walk away and call you crazy. Many of the responses she may give will seem outrageously immature and child like. Don't respond to it, it's a trap.
Flash back, James,im Gald you made a video on this subject, my Ex wife used to do this sorted behavior every other week, U R 100% correct, the narcissist will not work on any problems that surface in your relationtrip, they dont want to fix anything, they just want you to be a good little boy or girl, and follow everything they stomp there feet too.. And if you dont they will threaten to leave OR they will Break stuff when you are Gone..
@lnsertCleverName lol... so true! i'm not begood4000 but i saw your comment. A true narcissist will destroy you ! You may never recover from a true full blown narcissist ! i was with a full blown narcissist for ten years and that was five years ago and i'm still trying to get over it! Maybe you're drawn or turned on by a woman narcissist like me,it took me a while to figure out they are very bad news!
So true,this sounds just like my ex! My ex who is a NARCISSIST with all 9 Traits would not speak to me for weeks at a time ,just to hurt and be in control!
I notice that a lot of what you describe is often portrayed in the media as normal female behavior. Do you think that plays a part in enforcing this behavior in young girls, or is it more of a reflection of what the people creating the portrayal have seen in real life.
@TheLordmep it could be a combo of both. However, since most kids are baby sat by the TV, I would suspect they see these behaviors as norm from this at a early age. The TV I think teaches our kids some bad things sometimes.
My ex husband used to give me the silent treatment all the time, until i started to act like i didn't care and called my friends/family if i wanted to talk. Then he would want to talk,or go into a rage about ME ignoring him. You just can't win with them.
good point as ever-i had this when married, attempts to sort things out were blocked with this: she even got too cute and had us go to councilling, until it went against her evasion of communication and she left and refused to continue when the therapist was innocently trying to take over my role of opening things up to solve problems lol -gave herself away big time trying to be a smart arse
You are right James. After the first time it just gets longer and longer. With me I saw when I finally remove him from my life (like - instant messaging) he contacted me right away even after not talking to me for a long time. I saw what a game it was and how sick they were. Thankfully I had a friend this last time that warned me it was just a test to see how much ___ I would take. When I removed him from IM and he contacted me within minutes, I saw my friend was right.
Another thing they will do which is quite common is that they will hum tunes or whistle when you try to talk to them. Or even pick up their cell phone and start texting.
@fatpius ,it depends on what type of narcissist they are! Some narcissist get along good together if one narcissist is more into beauty and the other more into brains!
Ok in my past, when I would hang out at dumb places like clubs, I found a way around the silent treatment, but I won't claim that it was the most positive way. When the silent treatment occured, or the infamous "Dancing with other guys but watching my reaction the entire time" was taking place, I would just go talk to another girl. That got her talking, lol. Why do you think chicks do that anyway? Dance with dudes but watch me the whole time to see if I'm looking?
My partner of 18 years and father of my daughter did these things all the time. :( Both men and women can be a narcissists. What a horrible way to be. What a horrible way to live. Are you being brainwashed for loving someone? I was.
simonepowerflower 1 month ago
James, when this is at it's start, you will notice very long pauses before response. Then when the response comes, it's uncanny how irrelevant to what you said is. The whole point of this is to take you away from your thought process and at the end of the discussion, if she allows it to happen, she can walk away and call you crazy. Many of the responses she may give will seem outrageously immature and child like. Don't respond to it, it's a trap.
maconsumner 1 month ago
@maconsumner exactly. it's another form of "crazy making"
begood4000 1 month ago
man u really have their tactics on point! Glad u made it out brother
BigFellaMarkus 1 month ago
@BigFellaMarkus thank you. I'm glad I did as well.
begood4000 1 month ago
I am this
bmreve1234567890 1 month ago
James, your videos are always fantastic
RelationTermination 1 month ago
@RelationTermination thank you very much
begood4000 1 month ago
Flash back, James,im Gald you made a video on this subject, my Ex wife used to do this sorted behavior every other week, U R 100% correct, the narcissist will not work on any problems that surface in your relationtrip, they dont want to fix anything, they just want you to be a good little boy or girl, and follow everything they stomp there feet too.. And if you dont they will threaten to leave OR they will Break stuff when you are Gone..
karlbuttler 1 month ago
@karlbuttler They sure do and they sure will. I'm glad more people are waking up to these toxic types of people. I'm glad you liked my video. Thanks.
begood4000 1 month ago
This has been flagged as spam show
@lnsertCleverName lol... so true! i'm not begood4000 but i saw your comment. A true narcissist will destroy you ! You may never recover from a true full blown narcissist ! i was with a full blown narcissist for ten years and that was five years ago and i'm still trying to get over it! Maybe you're drawn or turned on by a woman narcissist like me,it took me a while to figure out they are very bad news!
sn9696 1 month ago
Comment removed
sn9696 1 month ago
So true,this sounds just like my ex! My ex who is a NARCISSIST with all 9 Traits would not speak to me for weeks at a time ,just to hurt and be in control!
sn9696 1 month ago
I notice that a lot of what you describe is often portrayed in the media as normal female behavior. Do you think that plays a part in enforcing this behavior in young girls, or is it more of a reflection of what the people creating the portrayal have seen in real life.
TheLordmep 1 month ago
@TheLordmep it could be a combo of both. However, since most kids are baby sat by the TV, I would suspect they see these behaviors as norm from this at a early age. The TV I think teaches our kids some bad things sometimes.
begood4000 1 month ago
@begood4000 Agreed on all counts.
TheLordmep 1 month ago
My ex husband used to give me the silent treatment all the time, until i started to act like i didn't care and called my friends/family if i wanted to talk. Then he would want to talk,or go into a rage about ME ignoring him. You just can't win with them.
sunset721 1 month ago
I have learned so much valuable info by watching your videos.
This is another piece to the narcissistic puzzle that I needed to know.
Thank you James!!!
gingerztube 1 month ago
good point as ever-i had this when married, attempts to sort things out were blocked with this: she even got too cute and had us go to councilling, until it went against her evasion of communication and she left and refused to continue when the therapist was innocently trying to take over my role of opening things up to solve problems lol -gave herself away big time trying to be a smart arse
DashiellCabasa 1 month ago
@DashiellCabasa I'm glad you liked the video. I'm also glad you got away from such a person. They are truely toxic.
begood4000 1 month ago
wow. Thank you again.
inklove878 1 month ago
@inklove878 your welcome
begood4000 1 month ago
You are right James. After the first time it just gets longer and longer. With me I saw when I finally remove him from my life (like - instant messaging) he contacted me right away even after not talking to me for a long time. I saw what a game it was and how sick they were. Thankfully I had a friend this last time that warned me it was just a test to see how much ___ I would take. When I removed him from IM and he contacted me within minutes, I saw my friend was right.
Lisa91860 1 month ago
I used to get this treatment when I was married. Solution...divorce. We talk all the time now!
nvguitarguy 1 month ago
Another thing they will do which is quite common is that they will hum tunes or whistle when you try to talk to them. Or even pick up their cell phone and start texting.
Haseeb2 1 month ago
Mine would say she was just multitasking and consider herself cleaver for doing so. Glad you brought this up.
RenegadeJuggler 1 month ago
Comment removed
Haseeb2 1 month ago
what happens when two narcissi are together?
fatpius 1 month ago
@fatpius The spit hits the fan even faster.
RenegadeJuggler 1 month ago
@fatpius ,it depends on what type of narcissist they are! Some narcissist get along good together if one narcissist is more into beauty and the other more into brains!
sn9696 1 month ago
Ok in my past, when I would hang out at dumb places like clubs, I found a way around the silent treatment, but I won't claim that it was the most positive way. When the silent treatment occured, or the infamous "Dancing with other guys but watching my reaction the entire time" was taking place, I would just go talk to another girl. That got her talking, lol. Why do you think chicks do that anyway? Dance with dudes but watch me the whole time to see if I'm looking?
lnsertCleverName 1 month ago
I just hope you didn't learn all this the hard way........
grady1610 1 month ago