I Love Progress Bars

[ItsMrVista]

Its like the whole of Mr Vista summed up neatly!

[TexMurphy01]

lol I NO RITE.

Seriously though... no.

[CariagaXIII]

i love progress bar too i hate spin thing then again i wish both was never been made at all what i mean i they should have made a computer run with no waiting at all

[squeaky0024]

I hate those windows progress bars that just have that bubble that goes right to left. I've been installing google earth recently and it made me so angry that they did not put in a 0-100% bar, instead they installed the endless bar that keeps going on and on, with no certain end, or at least a good estimate.

[Sabiancym]

I've never heard anyone pronounce progress like you do. Normally it's pronounced "prahgress" you went with "pro-gress".....just a little observation from your friendly internet anon.

[xDrekkex]

Play progress quest if you love progress bars!

[Bazil]

I HATE, those spinning bars, since they just go in a circle i never really know if im getting any closer to my goal, for all i know im just going from one point to infinity

[waitingforbrain]

O: It's Jack Black!!!

[itsBarcode]

you look like a woman.

funny, nonetheless

[maggosh]

0:17 That's what she said.

[LocustaVampa]

OH my lol. You're precious.

[CloneHat]

"The progress bar is moving, but the remaining time is going up!"

[crashbandicoot4everr]

lol

[wheresmyarm]

prohhhh-gress

[twoplusoneisthree]

oh damn, win.

[Supportahol]

LMAO! A friend told me about this video because he say my own vid about youtube slowness. I'll send it as a vid response. You might get a giggle from it!

[vandealex]

hey this video is almost done lol

[therealCanablisS]

this guy is a genious ...

[Ninjamaster333]

MACFAG DETECTED

[MST3kTomServo]

This was written elegantly. Bravo on presentation, and your delivery of simile.

[Zeroxius]

Win

[FightFlood]

hughugh, don't be sad just because nobody likes you and your videos...

[funkfisk]

wonderful, and they are fun to code too! :) but roadtrips has progressbars nowadays, called gps. :)

[oliebol61]

:D PROGRESS BAR FROM THE MAC=good

windows and linux=bad

[Microsoftultimatefan]

Windows has progress bars too.

[Microsoftultimatefan]

Macs have circles. D=

[CzarThePlezer]

Thats Asian girl in the end is hot

[thefalsetruths]

I love delta cause you can watch the distance the plane has gone over the country. love it.

[Drunkenvalley]

I think it's sad when they use progress bars on simple things like loading bars. e.e;

Time estimation is really rather hard to perform; you see it whenever you're going to move files and it's about as accurate as shooting with your eyes blindfolded and without knowing where your target is to begin with.

But just a progress bar is easily made by comparing size of loaded data against size of total data. e.e;

[fredarc]

you should have made fun of the youtube video progress bar. :D

[Joshlama]

he did!

0:12

[MachineOperatedBot]

wtf hidden photo at the end O.o sensless it is :D i be evil yoda

[Alenthas]

oh yeah, spinning sucks! i mean, whenever i see that spinning shit while game loading, it drives me crazy. i just wait and wait and wait and wait.... "when will this end?!?!?!" no idea... its just suck.

sometimes i count those spins to see how many spins left, it doesnt work...it always change, doh! -.-"

[andrea23345]

WOW you are veryy talented! your videos are short but still perfect!! I wish I had talent to make videos like that! I pretty much don't post anything because I suck at being creative lol

[05095jake]

i love progress

[parasharashish]

its nice and innovative

ashish

[hackermis]

yea ur a fag!!!

[koolness100]

hhahahahahh yeah thats true dude i hate sping as well im like hmm ok oh see look at it spin soo fast wooaaah later im like ok come on when the fuck and yes 99% of surprises do suck!! like when your like ok like its a surprise when your dog craps on the mat

[gnahzdivad]

w-what happens if the progress bar fucks around and goes from a 90% back to 0% because of an error? I've had those when un-installing big programs, and that sure pissed me off...

[ProductionsMNB]

yeah i just subbed :D

[ribsythedog]

dude ur funny i subed u make more funny vids! ; )

[IGotsSoMuchRhythm]

haha "hot pick of the month" nice :p

[stoplying]

Yes it is.

However, policies is not.

[dmanuel08]

Because he's funny.

Why do YOU watch him?

[saltruj]

realy hes funny

[trainbike47]

"99% of surprises suck." hahaha

[scowndrel]

Awesome. I just came across your stuff. VERY funny, witty, brilliant, and damned good!

[stoplying]

Spelling error at :49. Sorry.

Debbie Downer

[kirby1]

Dammit.

[dananddanfilms]

lol Don't worry Kirby. These things happen...

and you're a bigger man than me - personally, I ruthlessly delete any comments which expose any of my technical flaws.

[rorysux]

that was awful

[Freshbott2]

'99% of suprises SUCK'

Dunno where you got those statistics, but I know I personally hate suprises.

[Zomfsm]

5 stars, awesome!

but who the girl at 1:40 ??

[coversongproject]

The dreaded beachball of doom! Noooooo!

Awesome video man, very funny and furthermore, true.

[onedoubleninethree]

love it!

hate beach balls!

[worthyprofile]

When is this guys ranting going to be over with. There is no progress bar.

[CyrilKlopper]

You know what makes this video so great?

The progress bar under it

[AAMCMedia]

no thts a buffer bar

[mikomi26]

No the video "Progresses" after the buffer.... so it is a "progress bar"

[Drunkenvalley]

Amen, brother.

[pbnia]

lol: you know what would be great tomarow, if i wasn't dead, that'd be swell! lol

[dubccatz]

lmao.

RACE EM!!

SHARE EM!!!

COLLECT EM ALL!!!

btw divineboss he explains that at 0:12

[PrmierElectnSolu]

awesome, when will the STOP ERROR video be released?

[hyperion311]

haha so true

[ttto]

policies

[lookhoothetubeisnow]

GO PROGRESS BARS

[TheDivineBoss]

There's a progress bar under this video! :D

[shanario]

spiny things just mean THEY dont know

[Roboguy9000]

comment 10% posted... comment 20% posted... comment 30% posted... comment 40% posted... comment 50% posted... comment 60% posted... comment 70% posted... comment 80% posted... comment 90% posted... comment 100% posted... Comment text: lol Prog. bars are good

[paul84838]

oh! LMAO!

[barneydoherty]

How cruelly ironic. I'm having to wait for my slow moving progress bar to progress, so I can watch a clip about progress bars... sigh

My internet connection sucks :(

[HolywaterHangover]

Zing!

[Mudkipdude89]

Spinning sucks. Espically the ones that involve wind.

[Binary010110]

LoL so true, that's what I hate about IE/Firefox :P

[MikaelDoral]

Sharp Vid !

[psychoboyjaque]

Someone sounds like a Newfie. :D

[david57boring]

whyyyyy no longer available?????????????

[kirby1]

Hm?

[stuart1994]

"But did you know, ninety nine percent of surprises suck." You don't really think about but it's true.

[OriginalKemoSabe]

Surprise!  ...i suck...

[Epiphanized]

..loading comment..

[DanielScottLipe]

love the vids. Great work!!!

[boardchickd]

Just as I find myself trying to pause/rewind real life, I have noticed myself subconsciously looking for a progress bar (and a little irritated when I realize there isn't one) when something starts to drag on.......

I'll give a dollar to the guy who figures out how to install a progress bar in church. (especially for Superbowl Sunday!!!)

[qwarrentino]

You know what sucks? windows progressbars.. you think it´s almost done..but NOO.. then it starts from the beginning again. its like spinning progress

[Madsy9]

@qwarrentino I could tell you why this is the case, but then you'd probably want a progress bar on me.

[Phoenixkidd]

Good except your Canadian Accent it isn't PROW-Gress it's Pro-Gress, notice the "O" is short, I was listening to a seminar and I was completely distracted and annoyed at his use of the word Processor, I totally lost respoect when he kept saying Prow-Cessor--Uggh

[kirby1]

It's an accent, it's not incorrect. Do you have no respect for, say, the entire population of Britain or Australia?

[jbayterc]

You are right, many americans think their english is the only one in the world, in fact they think America it´s a country, and not a continent. So I guess Brasil is not part of America... Most of americans only speak english, while in south and central America the average person speaks 2 or 3. Ignorants

[doel89]

@kirby1 count Asian and Indians in too

[ThrottleStuckOpen]

The "o" is only short in your english accent, pal. You lose respect because someone else pronounces English correctly whilst you don't? Better invade their sorry ass country, huh?

[triformedmushroom]

@Phoenixkidd Well I totally lost respect for you when you actually felt the need to post a negative comment solely because you didnt like someones accent. Your ignorance is astounding

[jay62978]

fricken hilarious

[hadmiralhackbar]

windam earle?!

good reference to twin peaks dudes.

great vid

[WoawDude08]

I totally agree

[kwazi6]

LMFAO!

[cuckooman4]

But did you know that 99% of surprises suck?

[SpiritWolfSaint]

lol pause it at 1:40

[springrobin]

:) lol

[IronvoiceStudios]

yeah, i noticed that too lol

[bargd73]

sound makes up for surprises. imagine a horror movie with a progress bar to surprise..

[klingerea]

Yeah, spinning things on the net make me open up another browser page. Predictability is GOOD. Thanks for the good laugh

[NeoWargun]

this video was sooo dumb...

[mbunds]

Something I hate as bad a spinning stuff is repeating progress bars.

[citizenjanes]

Love it Kirby!! YOU ROCK.

[PhuckSub4Sub]

thumbs down... get a life nerd...

[lardhat]

Who gets the thumbs down? Check his rating.

[davidscalling]

I noticed that in VISTA as well as other software programs the Status Bars don't actually do anything other than flash back and forth or spin, or glow. Yet they don't indicate the status of anything at all. So most status bars today are just as useless as the vague and abiguous spinning ball things.

[Madsy9]

@davidscalling Actually, you're 100% right. Progress bars is a mental concept meant for end-users. It's impossible to accurately estimate the time a computer will use to complete a task. This is called the "Halting problem".

[Madsy9]

@davidscalling Computer Software nowadays tend to choose two approaches for animating progress bars:

1.) Draw it slowly, but never longer than 75%, then snap it right to 100% *after* the task is done.

2.) Based on some crude estimate like transfer speed, calculate some bullshit numbers and draw the bar based on that. This can make the bar jump backwards if the estimates are bad.

[MDKKnD]

Awesome man. Love it.

[Timstuff]

I hate surprises, because surprise means potential for disappointment.

[GoCheeksGo]

You verbalized thoughts I've had but never consciously recognized. HILARIOUS.

[enigmaohawaii]

pro-gress bars? not prah-gress bars? eev-a-loution? not eva-loution?

[C100WA]

THERE ARE ALOT BETTER VIDEOS THAN THIS

[krudmonger]

I would make a sarcastic comment about the note underneath me, but there's too good a chance it'll be deleted as spam advertisement posing as an actual comment, so I won't say anything.

ANYway... this cracked me up! Also, if you watch movies on your computer? That progress bar is a possibility (depending on the software). Unfortunately I don't see that coming to theaters any time soon.

[speedymysweety]

dont mess with my mamma foo!

[PolishPanix11]

race them, share them, collect them all! haha

[nanogirl]

That did NOT suck!

[pcgeek86]

Voted 1 star for using a Mac

[KingdomCarts]

How to make a featured video on YouTube:

1) Learn every effect and transition in all your video editing programs.

2) String a bunch of stream of consciousness dribble thoughts together with no focus, reason, or point.

3) Rewrite your script until you don't understand anything you've written. That will make you sound cerebral.

4) Be retro whenever possible.

5) Jump cuts are wicked awesome.

[mywarmsocks]

that was hilarious. thanks :)

[frugihoyi]

I doubt I´m the first to say this, but what about spinning progress bars? You know, the ones that come to an end after a full revolution. They´re okay.

[froobz]

i guess

[thatguyoverthere45]

"progress bars: Race 'em Share 'em Collect 'em all!" lol

[BobAcoustic]

Great!

[maimere]

If you have time, check an old game called Progress Quest. It's a infinite Progress-bar-based RPG game. It has predictability, but in a game that works like The Sims/SimCity/any simulator game. So it sucks and rocks(although it rocks more than sucks... try it.)

Cya.

[iamchase4life]

i was expecting a screamer after he said 99% of suprises suck

[OmegaM41]

Yeah, me too.  I began turning down the volume after he said that!

[TheLightningStalker]

LOL @1:07

[brianutube]

haha that's awesome

[titmongle]

spinning things bad -- no progress

progress bars good -- progress

w/out em, we'd think our pc's would freeze up a lot more than usual........

[marlo916]

i hate spinning stuff.

[MattNOYB]

This is why Youtube needs a progress bar when uploading videos.....WHEN WILL IT BE DONE! STOP UPLOADING AND GIVE ME MY VIDEO!

[MikeMarino]

They do now! :)

[MattNOYB]

Really? When did they do that? I know a month or two ago they didn't....

[MikeMarino]

Yeah, they just did it a couple weeks ago.

[j3zuz218]

What was that picture in the end?

[bitchiwantdinner]

is pronounced progress funny a canadian thing or something?

[bitchiwantdinner]

whoops spelled pronouncing wrong.

[XvegetarianXvampireX]

lol. This is random. I luvs it.

[brokenhope]

That was pretty funny.

[TysonMS]

lol pretty funny.

[froobz]

YES

[cobaingel]

Hahaha, this freaking kicks ass.

5 stars!

[adamallupinhere]

In a nutshell, macs suck!

[whovian1971]

In a nutshell, nobody give a fuck!

[afif95]

congrats on the featured vid

I like this vid

[SoranoSiaStrife]

lol that was brilliant ^^

[TwistedCommercials]

YES.

[DaDude9211]

Heh, Mac progress wheel... PC progress bar. If only they could learn they might outsell Microsoft...

[SlabStudios]

What is that supposed to mean? All of the progress bars in this were Mac progress bars, and have you forgotten the Windows hourglass?

[shockwavexb360]

what is a /b/?

[NamedTube]

what is /b/?

lololol!

[bull068]

No one knows...

[MSDesign87]

1:40 WTF?

[bloomingauthor7]

but did you know, 99% of surprises suck?

LOL

[jbkingsalmon11]

Yea blue4penny i get wat you're saying. I like my progress bars to be smooth and steady!

[jonasloverrr27]

That was very funny. :]

[amandag789]

that is true, but Mac computers are still way better than PC's.

[chickenlit]

HAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA LMFAO good one lol i almost thought you were serious for a minute

[MSDesign87]

FAIL

[blue4penny]

This is why I hate it when progress bars are erratic. Maybe it jumps 10% right off, then it waits a few minutes while stuff is happening before advancing halfway and stalls again . . . you know what I mean?

I love the bit about humans' progress focusing on predictability. It's so true!

[namtap]

Most progress bars aren't predictable though.

[DaPieguyStudios]

lol, with me, the vid didn't finish loading, and right before the part where he talks about the spinners, the vid pauses, and the spinning thing pops up. (-_-) oh, the irony.

[CurvoExpedio]

Disagreed. Our lives better be spinners!

[chaosrunner33]

the color spinner is what happens when a max program is not responding..

[bigfefan]

nice. spinning things suck and i hate the watch. but why the colorful spinner? is it gay and not sure when to come out of the closet??

[hoopla5117]

it's a mac spinner, rofl, and yes i think so

[bigfefan]

yes, I'm familiar with it. i hav a mac.

[trumpetgirl309]

that was highlarious

[PoliticalHell]

I need a progress bar for the shit parts of my life.

[Trixxycola1]

omg yea soo truu

[quicktooth1]

Cool video mate! I love your funny yet understated manner, and all the jokes were delivered with aplomb and on their own merits- no hamming it up! Thanks for the fun :D

[SensoryTheater07]

Dude, I come face to face every morning with the "loading", rather spinning wheel of death when I use the hand held Telxons. Seriously, try working at a big retail outlet that uses those and you will know exactly what I'm talking about.

[higgywiggypiggy]

My favourites are progress bars that appear to whizz by at super high speed, only to get stuck at 99% for some indeterminate length of time.

[quicktooth1]

Oh God yes. How many times I've seen THEM come up; inscrutable BASTARDS... XD

[TonyThriller]

lol

[LordDestin]

Exactly. Progress bars suck. I hate progress bars; they don't tell you anything! I once was unpacking a ZIP archive... the first 99% was done within a couple of minutes and waited almost two hours for the last (MASSIVE) file to be extracted. They're supposed to give you a measure of how far along you are, but they don't! Yet people just accept it. Fuck progress bars. Get rid of them please. You'd be pissed if I gave you a meter-stick that wasn't ACTUALLY a meter long, but not a bad progress bar?

[cyanidemoon]

progress bars make you lazy and expect things = modernist. spinning is not knowing when because thats more realistic = postmodern