Your Soul Needs No Applause

[manyhumbles]

STEVE: Thank you for sharing in beautiful non-pretentious, straight from the heart manner. I believe that the ability to recognize our mistakes and to learn from them in our lives and then extend our hand to help another up the life lesson ladder is the best of Humanity. Can you imagine the places we Humans can go if we all did this for each other instead of competing and dividing? I imagine you must have been going through some real rough times to get this wise...

[Alexisme1001]

I find Teilhard de Chardin's notion of the universe as an evolving seed of Godhood interesting. It implies that those who accomplish something good are bringing everyone and everything closer to a divine state, in which all are happy and there is no suffering. For instance, we honor Pasteur for finding a cure for rabies, but he is basically in the same boat as the rest of us, no better or worse, striving for a future in which the nightmare of suffering in time dissipates like a bad dream.

[TadRapidly]

This is why everyone "hates" their parents. On a subconscious level (at LEAST!) your parents were JUDGING you based on your ability to cope / maneuver in the material world. They were EVALUATING you based on your "performance". They were not loving "you", they were in love with the image of who YOU MIGHT BECOME. Thats why they are DISAPPOINTED IN YOU TO THIS DAY. ;-)

They don't care about YOU, they care about their STORY about you.

[vagabondsteve]

@TadRapidly Well said. If we understand this about our parents we can have more empathy for them. Your comment can also make us better parents with this insight.

[TadRapidly]

@vagabondsteve yup, i have MASSIVE empathy for my parents. And for myself too.

[mela2828]

Good thoughts about approval and validation. You are who you are not what anyone says about you. :)

[namitsu1]

I read about some crazy out of the box things to do like dressing up in a chicken suit or wearing a dress (as a man) and go into the public, to get rid of that need for validation.

[vagabondsteve]

@namitsu1 I used to do this. It's a great practice to break free. Thanks for your ideas.

[namitsu1]

@vagabondsteve That's very commendable you went through that. For me I feel it's still too hard. The society has programmed my brain. I am aware of it consciously but feel like my unconscious mind can't break free from it yet. Would you be comfortable to share some of the things you did?

[vagabondsteve]

@namitsu1 You don't need break free, just observe and be aware. Like you wrote in your other comment, just do do things which push you out of your comfort zone.

[Ravenmyst1]

Another great Video.. and another great topic!! I think maybe I am just odd.. the only validation I have ever wanted or needed was mine.. this doesn't mean that I don't tell my son he has done a good job for something to which he will always reply" Yeah I know" Lol! Keep the great Videos coming!!

[vagabondsteve]

Thank you for your kind words and sharing your thoughts!

[MammaNole]

Yay! You got it, Steve, that's awesome! :) I think we should not be dependant upon other's approval to define who we are, but at the same time we should willingly give our admiration to those we admire.

[hollywoodartchick]

Well, once again, you touched on a very key area of my life, Steve. As a professional artist among others of my kind, so much emphasis is put on "What the director said about your work" and what outward signs point to which artist is "best" or most valuable to a project. It makes us crazy, weighing every comment and wondering what it means for our futures. I can detach for long periods, but just hearing others talk about it can trigger me back into the muck.

[vagabondsteve]

As always hollywood thank you for sharing. Focus on the source and the symptoms fix themselves. It's best to work on building a rock solid spiritual foundation. Meditation, contemplation, healthy lifestyle, journaling, and most important time in solitude are transformational. Then what people say or don't say looses its vice like grip upon us.

[CountDOODOO]

Brilliant insight! I love it! We do have this strange addiction to praise and approval. We definitely need to break away from gaining approval from others to just gaining approval from ourselves if we want to be in control of our happiness and worthiness.

[vagabondsteve]

Thank you for your comments. I did another video called "Wean Yourself from the Teat of Approval" & "Absolute Honesty for Beginners" which further expands upon this topic.