Michael Swaim, please have my babies. No, you don't have to remind me that two men can't make a baby together. I have high hopes for the future, though. Some say too high, but fuck them.
I have a weird feeling that Michael Swaim does indeed have a rather good taste in music. Maybe not because of the video, but his hand gesture and several other things across his videos indicate such, including (but not being limited to) playing the guitar (and/or failing at trying to play the guitar) and wearing a Pink Floyd shirt..
@MonstersInside are you calling me dumb as fuck?? just read the previous comment if you are that "slow" it kinda means you are also pretty retarded.. so dont even try and have the last word you are waay to slow and stupid for that XD
@ultimatebeunhaas I obviously read it, since I replied. Not being able to recall a tune does not equal retarded. Learn to read and write english before you try to call people stupid. Go back to your bridge, troll.
@MonstersInside yeah my native language isn't even english and still i am able to figure out that you are a retarded douchebag that isnt even worth my time :D ""go back to your bridge troll"?? go back to your world of worcraft you worthless faggot!!! if you reply to this you are a real faggot with down syndrom!! fuck you!! you got powned you piece of horsesperm hahaha
@ultimatebeunhaas Troll = WOW now? Well that's new. I thought it was small minded people who insulted people on comments in youtube videos. My mistake. I don't care if you think I'm gay, I have to say, and replying to your comment doesn't make it any more true or false. You saying I was "powned" does not make it so, either. Have a nice time in Hell.
@MonstersInside im quite done with you because this argument isnt going anywhere since you continue to try and out talk me and continue to fail!.....ill have a great time in hell with my friends Adolf, MJ and puppetpal earl...and i think ill see you there to but i hope not because that would ruin hell for me,
@ultimatebeunhaas You've been the agressor the whole time, and think that's the point of Hell. I don't think I need to reply anymore. Perhaps you shouldn't get so worked up.
PLEASE DONT READ THIS. YOU WILL GET KISSED ON THE NEAREST POSSIBLE FRIDAY BY THE LOVE OF YOUR LIFE. TOMORROW WILL BE THE BEST DAY OF YOUR LIFE. HOWEVER IF YOU DONT POST THIS COMMENT something bad will happen. NOW UV STARTED READIN DIS DUNT STOP THIS IS SO SCARY. SEND THIS TO 5 VIDEOS IN 143 MINUTES WHEN UR DONE PRESS F6 AND UR CRUSHES NAME WILL APPEAR ON THE SCREEN IN BIG LETTERS. THIS IS SO SCARY CAUSE IT ACTUALLY WORKS THIS ACTUALLY WORKS
Oh God...It's been SO long since I actually laughed at some video...
and the part about the facekicking and the vegetative state comment made me laugh so hard I remained silent, thank you ThoseArentMuskets...This is a truly great feat.
And then the man in black simply left, to rock other faces, master other universes, drink other bottles of milky shit. Some say he was a king. Some say he was a god. THEY WERE BOTH RIGHT.
OH GOOD LORD! I'D BLANKED THAT OUT! That fuckin ride is Nemesis at Alton Towers and I've, sadly, been on it so many times, it's almost guaranteed that I've sat in the same seat as one of those sweaty naked people! YARGH!
do u want the orbs of power now or later and is it the egyptian or the chinese your askin 4. next time mikey(hope u dont mind me calling u mikey) be more specific
Hey...........I remember the hot dog episode of the Guiness Book of World Records! Pretty goofy, but what was even goofier was the episode where a guy set a new record when he stuffed 3 hamburgers into his mouth at once (not joking)!
there was a 4 year old watching tv alone in hjer house her tv turned off all of a sudden she heard a noise out from her window she lokked there was a bloody face .
post this 2 at least 5 vidz or ur going to see it and its gonna kill u!!!!!!
S.W.A.I.M. you unknowingly delivered a sentence one's life should go by. "life is all about context". It makes me cry how awesome Those Aren't Muskets are..... run down my cheeks tears, run!
"And than the man in black simply left... to rock other faces, master other universes, drink other bottles of milky shit. Some say he was a king, some say he was a god... THEY WERE BOTH RIGHT!!"
Aw fuggedaboudit!
reejis99 1 month ago
some say he was a king.........some say he was a GOD
PhillyBluntsDoItRite 4 months ago
You have ass cancer.
MoneyR8 4 months ago
Shit! I spend two fucking years finding the orbs of power, and they've cancelled the show before I could choose a topic. -:(
Johnahue23 5 months ago 5
subtle gob bluth reference at the end: 10000 cool points for you
ilytopy 6 months ago 2
prince ashitaka! mononoke ftw!
CaptianBlindfold 6 months ago
"Ooh, burn, old people!"
*Seriously, burn old people*
I almost died at that.
TheRoboticFerret 7 months ago 12
This has been flagged as spam show
Snap!....Snap!....SnOooouu
Harmony0518 8 months ago
Snap!....Snap!....Oooouu
Harmony0518 8 months ago
,,, Prince Ashitaka ... Google it :)
Xigano1 9 months ago
I love that there is a flash of G.O.B Bluth in the final countdown :-P
TheWrackspurt 9 months ago 2
Michael Swaim, please have my babies. No, you don't have to remind me that two men can't make a baby together. I have high hopes for the future, though. Some say too high, but fuck them.
MrCynix 10 months ago 3
Seriously, burn old people.
ArthurZ101 10 months ago
I have a weird feeling that Michael Swaim does indeed have a rather good taste in music. Maybe not because of the video, but his hand gesture and several other things across his videos indicate such, including (but not being limited to) playing the guitar (and/or failing at trying to play the guitar) and wearing a Pink Floyd shirt..
HeartAttack1990 1 year ago
any chance I can get a link to the "Play you out" video of the person playing the weird thingie to Final Countdown?
ILuvKonata 1 year ago
4:00, snap snap snap snap snap snap snap snap snap snap snap snap snap snap snap snap snap snap snap snap snap snap snap snap snap snap snap snap snap snap snap snap snap snap snap snap snap snap snap snap snap snap snap snap snap snap snap snap snap snap snap snap snap snap snap snap snap snap snap snap snap snap snap snap snap snap snap snap snap snap snap snap snap snap snap snap snap snap snap snap
RnDnproductions 1 year ago
@RnDnproductions SN- OOH
Cannonsilencer 1 year ago
4:39 - 5:00 Best moment in the history of comedy
Zyphes 1 year ago
what happened to michael swaim?
bobdoles123 1 year ago
SNAP! SNAP! SNA-OOOOHHHHH!!!!!!
THEUNOTE 1 year ago 9
THE ORBS OF POWER!!!!!!!!!!!!!
thefishface100 1 year ago
Must... burn... old people...
infernocanuck 1 year ago
Some say he was a King
Some say he was a God
THEY WERE BOTH RIGHT
Silko3000 1 year ago 2
snap snap ooh
TheApache101 1 year ago
cake. farts.
spites1 1 year ago
So lame that they took it off of Cracked. Thank goodness it's here at least!
DrRoy1 1 year ago 4
OMFG, GIVE me that song at the end. i MUST have it
monoham1 1 year ago
Some say he was a king. Some say he was a god. They were both right! Love that line.
JRO1646 1 year ago
5:33 NEVER!!
stewiesbabe 1 year ago
must burn old people...Swaim commands it....
drumlip 1 year ago
...I was trying to figure out what the song at the end was for five minutes and why it was so familiar. Final Countdown. Gotcha.
MonstersInside 1 year ago
@MonstersInside it took you five mins?? :O GodfuckingDamnit your slow as fuck!! hahahah XD
ultimatebeunhaas 1 year ago
@ultimatebeunhaas At least I'm not dumb as fuck.
MonstersInside 1 year ago
@MonstersInside are you calling me dumb as fuck?? just read the previous comment if you are that "slow" it kinda means you are also pretty retarded.. so dont even try and have the last word you are waay to slow and stupid for that XD
ultimatebeunhaas 1 year ago
@ultimatebeunhaas I obviously read it, since I replied. Not being able to recall a tune does not equal retarded. Learn to read and write english before you try to call people stupid. Go back to your bridge, troll.
MonstersInside 1 year ago
@MonstersInside yeah my native language isn't even english and still i am able to figure out that you are a retarded douchebag that isnt even worth my time :D ""go back to your bridge troll"?? go back to your world of worcraft you worthless faggot!!! if you reply to this you are a real faggot with down syndrom!! fuck you!! you got powned you piece of horsesperm hahaha
ultimatebeunhaas 1 year ago
@ultimatebeunhaas Troll = WOW now? Well that's new. I thought it was small minded people who insulted people on comments in youtube videos. My mistake. I don't care if you think I'm gay, I have to say, and replying to your comment doesn't make it any more true or false. You saying I was "powned" does not make it so, either. Have a nice time in Hell.
MonstersInside 1 year ago
@MonstersInside i love when people argue over the internet
bbernard99 1 year ago
@bbernard99 I know, it just shows the great intelligence of all of us.
MonstersInside 1 year ago
@MonstersInside im quite done with you because this argument isnt going anywhere since you continue to try and out talk me and continue to fail!.....ill have a great time in hell with my friends Adolf, MJ and puppetpal earl...and i think ill see you there to but i hope not because that would ruin hell for me,
sincirely fuck yourself!!!
ultimatebeunhaas 1 year ago
@ultimatebeunhaas You've been the agressor the whole time, and think that's the point of Hell. I don't think I need to reply anymore. Perhaps you shouldn't get so worked up.
MonstersInside 1 year ago
@MonstersInside whatever dude i was done with you so stfu and go inhale some zyklon B... ow and...LAST WORD!!!
ultimatebeunhaas 1 year ago
@ultimatebeunhaas I honestly don't care but I couldn't resist commenting to cheat you of the satisfaction of having the last word.
MonstersInside 1 year ago
@MonstersInside no problem man the satisfaction is al yours... NOT!!! god im childish hahah but i dont care : |
ultimatebeunhaas 1 year ago
You suck, Sweden.
stanleykubrick98 1 year ago
I can't stop watching!
FourthDimensionAnim 1 year ago
LOVE THE SHOT OF GOB AT THE END
arrested development!
shazzycat3449 1 year ago
i know that onion eater!!!! he was my teacher!
MegaDopesmoke 1 year ago
They should combine that egg-crushing contest with banana snapping, for THE ULTIMATE MALE GENITORTURE METAPHOR!!!
Helltamirre 1 year ago 3
This has been flagged as spam show
PLEASE DONT READ THIS. YOU WILL GET KISSED ON THE NEAREST POSSIBLE FRIDAY BY THE LOVE OF YOUR LIFE. TOMORROW WILL BE THE BEST DAY OF YOUR LIFE. HOWEVER IF YOU DONT POST THIS COMMENT something bad will happen. NOW UV STARTED READIN DIS DUNT STOP THIS IS SO SCARY. SEND THIS TO 5 VIDEOS IN 143 MINUTES WHEN UR DONE PRESS F6 AND UR CRUSHES NAME WILL APPEAR ON THE SCREEN IN BIG LETTERS. THIS IS SO SCARY CAUSE IT ACTUALLY WORKS THIS ACTUALLY WORKS
909Coult 1 year ago
I cant get your videos to run on your site, so I've come here.. (almost all your other videos work, just not these eps..
Great work btw :)
SlowBurnDeath 1 year ago
Oh God...It's been SO long since I actually laughed at some video...
and the part about the facekicking and the vegetative state comment made me laugh so hard I remained silent, thank you ThoseArentMuskets...This is a truly great feat.
SexRobotOfDoom 1 year ago
haha those are retarted records
anonymous6366 1 year ago
It takes me much longer to drink a liter of silt.
CarryLarry 1 year ago
SERIOUSLY BURN OLD PEOPLE!
rockonrache 1 year ago 3
Funny man........
Fraser3005 1 year ago
2:24 Looks like Jessica Simpson. Have a look.
cherylz1 1 year ago
"Some say he was a king. Some say he was a god. They were both right!"
Roflcopter!!! Favorite Swaim quote ever, which is saying a lot.
iLarry15 1 year ago 2
Lol, I like how he's trying to make the longest video by an android for cracked but he's going so fast. xD
PulchritudinousPlea 1 year ago
don't hate on Sweden.
browdwayloverz 1 year ago
Sweden is awesome but i must say that was lame as fuck :D SWAIM<3
person2456 1 year ago
Snap! Snap! Sn... Ooh!
peanutfoot 1 year ago
BURN OLD PEOPLE!!!!! haha i love this guy
BingBongSisters 1 year ago
Those guys eating the onion are pathetic, i ate a whole purple colored onion once at a party, it was easy.
P.S; you suck sweden
fawkes78 1 year ago
Hahahahahahahahaha.
s0denone 1 year ago
.... u suck sweeden
batmannn 1 year ago
siggug wiffer bubbly jerkin is now my personal catchphrase. Thanks s.w.a.i.m!
SSXtrikE 1 year ago
And then the man in black simply left, to rock other faces, master other universes, drink other bottles of milky shit. Some say he was a king. Some say he was a god. THEY WERE BOTH RIGHT.
peanutfoot 1 year ago 3
SNAP! SNAP!
MacBookProist 1 year ago 3
Awesome, this was banned on Cracked
Tacom4ster 1 year ago
@Tacom4ster Why??
ObviouslyScottish 1 year ago
@ObviouslyScottish Copyrights or something,
Tacom4ster 1 year ago
at the end, that's crouts0 on the kazookelele!
i love that guy!
yetidetective 1 year ago
seriously, burn old people.
floomdesk 1 year ago 3
"I FEEEAR HIS MIGHT." o__o
Dradeeus 1 year ago 2
OH GOOD LORD! I'D BLANKED THAT OUT! That fuckin ride is Nemesis at Alton Towers and I've, sadly, been on it so many times, it's almost guaranteed that I've sat in the same seat as one of those sweaty naked people! YARGH!
TheRandyChimp 1 year ago 2
LOOOL: Sigger Wiffer Bubbly Ierking
flyhighj65 1 year ago
do u want the orbs of power now or later and is it the egyptian or the chinese your askin 4. next time mikey(hope u dont mind me calling u mikey) be more specific
basketballalonzo 1 year ago
Yay for Gob at the end!
capillarian187 1 year ago 3
hah, you get it? Cause it's disturbing. xD
steinskalle 1 year ago 2
Is Michael Swaim married :\
CaffeineKitteh 1 year ago 4
"I'd like to give my vows in the manner of my D&D character"
fuckpetelarson 1 year ago 2
You have ass cancer.
airgilbert 1 year ago
love the miyazaki references
batosai70 2 years ago
"snap snap sna..OoOoh."
mcdonaldguy19 2 years ago 3
"And then the man in black simply left, to rock other faces, master other universes, drink other bottles of milky shit"
LMFAO!!
sellthemanicans 2 years ago 75
@sellthemanicans
Some say he was a king. Some say he was a god.
They were BOTH RIGHT
PiratePontiusPilate 1 year ago 5
.......you suck Sweden
LOL nearly pissed myself
kamikazeCORP 2 years ago
Well I just won this record, because I did piss myself.
icyswordofawesome 2 years ago
thats it.. just the toes fapfapfap XD
Rockyface 2 years ago 27
HEY ! Hey ! Hey. hey.
you suck.
KlalleG 2 years ago
GOB FTW
thatnikkid 2 years ago
hahaha woo sweden
ThaEther 2 years ago
lol...i love swaim
punkemorockmetalhead 2 years ago 4
sweden sucks
zekake 2 years ago
so does your mom
iceskater1 2 years ago
Comment removed
creepycrunchy 2 years ago
damn tight reference to arrested development at the end. fuckin awesome show
peachomatic3000 2 years ago 5
@peachomatic3000
I concur
cgmsdh 2 years ago 2
@peachomatic3000 YEEEEAAAAHHHHH
thatnikkid 2 years ago
A... spoonula?
BeastHandz 2 years ago
@BeastHandz Yeah, wtf
TX169 2 years ago
It's the final countdown!
CrystalFlames 2 years ago 3
fapfapfapfapfap :D
Dynysia030 2 years ago
It's Gob!!
Stumperific 2 years ago 4
nice mononoke reference
madliana 2 years ago 3
This has been flagged as spam show
Really stupid video...
theotrian 2 years ago
wait wait wait.. x'D you can't say "you suck sweden" and then call the final countdown the best song ever~
helloo~
DorkyPPoi 2 years ago
Sadly this got taken off the cracked website.
TheRealToony 2 years ago 3
Why was that I wonder?
chimpspanner 2 years ago
Ending rocks!
Vaioleto 2 years ago
my fave one!
vote4dancingpenguin 2 years ago
FUNNY
21eduj 2 years ago
a bottle of milky shit HA
SuperKarf 2 years ago 3
I love Arby's, ya doucher! :)
adamjlynch 2 years ago
Did I see flashes of Gob at the end?
spencer525 2 years ago 2
You sure did. Final Countdown is his theme song, baby!
Arkk0n 2 years ago
snap! snap! sna- oww!!
flashkan 2 years ago 3
spoonula..
skaterblo 2 years ago 2
I will bring you the orbs of power ...
TheDeadApple 2 years ago 18
Hey...........I remember the hot dog episode of the Guiness Book of World Records! Pretty goofy, but what was even goofier was the episode where a guy set a new record when he stuffed 3 hamburgers into his mouth at once (not joking)!
lurch321 2 years ago
"you have ass cancer"
ROFL
jackstorm777 2 years ago 5
So, is this the final countdown? That's the song at the end right?
No more Cracked tv..:(
Pandemic5457 2 years ago 4
Some say he was a King, others say he was a god....THEY WERE BOTH RIGHT.
kaledivh 2 years ago 3
God you are so funny!
listerofsmeg0 2 years ago 2
just laughed my head off!
that was hilarious! XD
the ending theme was epic! haha
pexpix 2 years ago
We urge our audience never to try anything like this ever
LOLOLOLOLOL
defragen1 2 years ago
Swaim's the cats testicles. And by that I mean hes the Rhino's elbows. And by that I mean he's the Koala's beard. And by that I mean he's awesome.
CrimsonRaven47 2 years ago 6
why did they only make 14 episodes? ;p this is like the best show ever
pauliux11 2 years ago
"SNAP SNAP, oooo"
Hilarious
AsianPrototype 2 years ago 3
Siggug
Wifer
Bbbly
Jrkin
HA!
kbmuncher 2 years ago
GEORGE OSCAR BLUTH II !
riffxrocker 2 years ago
seriously burn old ppl
ProfessionalMoe 2 years ago 4
the orbs of power are Nikola Tesla's balls.
b5201 2 years ago 2
Did you know he had THREE testicles?
MrJohnnyOldschool 2 years ago
4:43
Aw fageht abawtit
jjjintheusa 2 years ago
BURN OLD PEOPLE!!! lol
TGStealth 2 years ago
Still trying to make you huge, but not sold out and shitty, though I don't believe it a possibility. I like the just the toes part.
nillish 2 years ago
keep your homophobia to yourself guy
LOL!!!!!!
localboyrlm 2 years ago
some say he was a king, some say he was a god.. they where BOTH RIGHT!
xxR0ADKILLxx 2 years ago 4
I realy hate going this but, What is the name of the song at the end?
ensui682 2 years ago
europe final countdown
robbke101 2 years ago
lols.
baragigantea 2 years ago
I <3 U SWAIM!!!
moogirl226 2 years ago
drink other bottles of milky shit!!
jmac530 2 years ago
That's not milk.
snaffus 2 years ago
It's milky shit!
Toootally diffrent thing.
noobsvensken 2 years ago
Sounds shitty to me.
snaffus 2 years ago
Shits milky to me...
Zafoshin 2 years ago
We all love you SWAIM
Pandemic5457 2 years ago 2
SNAP! SNAP! SN--
ooh!
SIMM0NS77 2 years ago 5
XD.
schoolsucksent 2 years ago
This comment has received too many negative votes show
Ma, that guy's a dick. And a racist one at that.
shepardskinsoup 2 years ago
This comment has received too many negative votes show
this guys not even funny waste of my fuckin time.
nicwhat4 2 years ago
GOB
Monkeyboy92037 2 years ago
:57
Fuck you Grant Denyer
7R1574N 2 years ago
you have ass cancer lololololololo
daninja13 2 years ago
the end song was frikkin amazing
lalalandd123 2 years ago 2
omg Gob!!! i saw the Gob... his place on TV shall be missed forever T_T
xXSpecter93Xx 2 years ago
LOL @ "Seriously burn old people"
IckleBanana 2 years ago
i love it!
slusheee 2 years ago
lol 1:22 Mike Rowe from dirty jobs!
ciucinciu 2 years ago
HAHA at Japanese Fonsie.
gilli39 2 years ago
"That's one eggs-tremely creepy video! Get it? 'Cause it's disturbing. Er... Wait..."
Haha!
kingofevilpotato 2 years ago 5
Some say he was a King... Some say he was a God.. They were both right!!!
AWESOME
sammyboy2210 2 years ago 7
BURN OLD PEOPLE!!
rushaholic 2 years ago 3
This has been flagged as spam show
there was a 4 year old watching tv alone in hjer house her tv turned off all of a sudden she heard a noise out from her window she lokked there was a bloody face .
post this 2 at least 5 vidz or ur going to see it and its gonna kill u!!!!!!
90031661302304 2 years ago
Haha, I love the Princess Mononoke reference at 4:38
Aerach89 2 years ago 4
i know right?? swaim's a genius xD
aleaiactaest44 2 years ago 2
and a flash of Gob, he ha.
LordeSloth 2 years ago
"Just the toes baby... Just the toes..." HAHAHAHA FUCKING HILARIOUS.
chosentonessournotes 2 years ago 2
haha gob at the end
btw i know one of the head kicking guys. SO THERE
peteradamson 2 years ago
This is fantastic!
NonRandomNonSense 2 years ago
4:39 awesome and accurate dubbing!!
StanMarsh02 2 years ago
S.W.A.I.M. you unknowingly delivered a sentence one's life should go by. "life is all about context". It makes me cry how awesome Those Aren't Muskets are..... run down my cheeks tears, run!
VivaZweiFan 2 years ago
I love the zazzokelele
seanhy123 2 years ago
nice princess mononoke reference
cakelover1028 2 years ago
You are a genius man.
Love your vids.
Serioga91 2 years ago 2
"And than the man in black simply left... to rock other faces, master other universes, drink other bottles of milky shit. Some say he was a king, some say he was a god... THEY WERE BOTH RIGHT!!"
zoicd 2 years ago 7
That was really good. Where are the views? You should be up there!
ChaosmanOne 2 years ago
The best episode ever!!!!
zoicd 2 years ago