This fuckin faggot Dante you cock smoker

[214crazydude]

"all she did was un-loosen the nuts"

thats what she said

[camryclubofcasper]

OMG SILENT BOB SPOKE!!!!!!!!!!

[GeorgeVreelandHill]

Great movie.

George Vreeland Hill

[Frallon]

"Come on Limp dick!" "Lunchbox" "Tons of Fun" Lol

[whoohaaXL]

"All she did was UN-LOOSEN the nuts...."

That would mean tighening them, doesn't he mean LOOSEN the nuts?

[cherrybombx27]

You have one of the best usernames I've come across on here. Thanx for posting.

[mustbejames1]

the grandma speech owned it all.

[MrJayCudmore]

Bob spills nothing but quite truth.

[greyknight7]

1:55 true wisdom

[imstoned6]

i dunno she was senile and shit she used to fuckin piss herself all the time, and shit herself

[GhettoBlaster100]

"you know there are a million fine looking women in the world dude, but they don't all bring you lasagna at work, most of em just chat on you" words of wisdom

[duduvcd3000]

@THRASHERVOLUME fuck you thats one of the funniest movie ever

[crazyv202]

Lol how can you give someone advice and that just cuss him out. This move is classic!

[malvern666]

Was cocksmoker around before this movie came out?

[namayake]

My man Silent Bob spouts the wisdom there at the end. A good girlfriend is more than just a good lay, she's actually your friend too.

[Npowell01]

 ESTJay.

[motorbreath94]

I like how when silent bob does talk he says the most enlightening shit

[Somedokin]

@motorbreath94 That line was originally intended for Jason Mewes, but he he was so camera shy he couldn't deliver it. That's also why the camera just cuts between Jay and Dante. He couldn't deliver his lines with too many people around.

[1MoreRoundbrother]

weed > girlfriends

[SnIkLeeT]

@1MoreRoundbrother I agree, that's why I get hi every day and I don't want a GF >:D

[tomthedestroyer]

@SnIkLeeT yea cause getting "hi" is the bad ass thing to do nowadays. Some people prefer getting high, but to each his own.

[SnIkLeeT]

@tomthedestroyer Aw shut up man :P

[jordan3649]

Dante got those words for a reason, not because they just felt like lashing out on him. They both realized that Dante needed to man up and appreciate his girlfriend. They did him a favor...Look at Dante's face after this scene.

[bucktoothjackass]

Noise noise noise, shmokin' weed, shmokin' weed, doin' coke, drinkin' beers

[zuzazla]

after watching clerks i switched from saying 'you're a dick' or sth... i go with cocksmoker now :3

[MrRedFredSaid]

Amazing how stupidly bigoted some heterosexuals are.

[joshslayer007]

@MrRedFredSaid LOL, FAG

[calzowned]

@MrRedFredSaid can it pickle puffer

[13garo31]

@MrRedFredSaid that's a pretty gay thing to say

[HypocriteSkeleton3]

"There a million good looking woman in the world, but they don't all bring you lasagna at, most of them just cheat on you."

Ain't that the fuckin truth.

[CustomBumpMaker]

I fucking love Clerks.

bahaha.

[caleb9608]

i hate fags

[superstubes]

@caleb9608

NO - you "hate" yourself'.

[LadyLala04]

I can understand why Jay flipped out on Dante. In the beginning of the scene Jay is trying to be friendly but Dante is being curt and dismissive to him. Jay's verbal abuse is a delayed reaction to Dante's rudeness. But enough of my analyzation, this scene is AWESOMELY FUNNY!!!

[poopblake]

@LadyLala04  ya killed it

[gothamite27]

I think scenes like this show how effective Mewes really was in this role. I never once thought he was an actor playing a role. He always seemed utterly realistic and credible as Jay, even in the most fantastical scenes. Maybe he's not a very diverse actor, but he was certainly suited to this part.

[madtiger111]

C'mon, Limp Dick!

[Cubarted]

shmokin weed, doin coke, drinkin beers :D

[notyoursavior78]

Yeah Mewes is totally rolling a joint here. If you question the Jay man, well in MallRats, Kevin Smith put up his own money and own credibility for him to stay in the hotel after the studio decided he would be apart of MallRats.

So Mewes ultimately had to win the job himself in front of some suits to remain as the role. At the time the studio had other actors they were more interested in for casting as the role of Jay.

[trailextremist]

might be funnier if I could hear what theyre saying..?

[Uzzie101]

@trailextremist *turn up the speakers*

[FilmmakerRyan]

@trailextremist The audio is fine. Check your speakers and YouTube volume level.

[Hwhyet]

He's looking down the whole time not because he can't remember his lines but because he's rolling a joint. Look at 1:45 where he licks the paper and finishes rolling.

[BroWhatever]

I love how Jay just turns on him, despite a minute ago asking if he wanted to hang out at a party.

[shootthekitty]

the Not-So-Silent Bob

[BIGFREEZ]

How does a fgt like dante land a broad like rosario dawson? fukouttaheya!!!!

[GrizzlyRecoveryZone1]

when "Jay & Silent Bob" were still REAL!

[cbarbarinlakerfan]

its time to kick back drink some beers and smoke some weed!!

[Kman2025]

I love how jay just randomly switches from trying to give genuine friendly advice to heinously abusing Dante in a matter of seconds for no reason! haha

[PhilipEbanks]

"C'mon, limpdick!"

[SlaveLaborFan]

@PhilipEbanks yeah yeah yeah....

[PhilipEbanks]

>:D

[gregpphoto]

@Kman2025 Thats how we do it in the north east. Now go f yaself.

[cinnamonmailbox]

The word faggot saved my marriage. I wake up each morning and thank every fag there is for being a fag so the word fag and/or faggot still burns like a red hot icon of hope in my heart.

[meagain499]

@cinnamonmailbox what????? are you smoking crack?

[GayTexanCommunist]

Cool people like to use the word faggot as an insult. Wow, way clever.

[nunpunter]

Faggot has nothing to do with being gay. You have no right trying to take away a beautifully phonetic form of insult. Stop being such a fag.

[awoken555]

Seeing this reminds me how much i love this movie. This will always be a classic in my eyes.

[cffnmkr13]

Silent Bob? His name should be "Mostly Silent Bob" or "Talks Seldomly Bob" as he's talked in every damn movie!

Ya'd think a film director would know somethng about film making history, like in Silent Movies, no body talked 'cos they were Silent Movies!!!!!

[Contact907]

If I could punch you through my screen, I would. Are you that dense?

[cffnmkr13]

@Contact907

You can punch me threw your screen. So make that fist and swing!

LMAO at how lame you are!

[kheylub]

@cffnmkr13

he only has one line in every movie

[ReyesRobby]

The Zeitgeist Movement.  Abolish hate and money. Power Elites = child molesters

[cffnmkr13]

Some people think I am Sir E. Yuss, but I'm only Joe King.

[blechtman]

do you know how long it took me to realize that silent bob is kevin smith?

[SuperNinja147]

What, about 15 years 2 months?

[ikuiku93]

HE TALKED i love it hes always so deep!!!

[UrkinGuy]

@ikuiku93 he talk in all his movies when he plays bob

[beezified]

such faggadocio

[DrPoon]

I love how he is all cool then just randomly insults dante. This was jay at his best.

[deathblooms111]

one of the fucking funniest movies ever lol.

[thepunkster90]

whoa, silent bob talked

[madtiger111]

schmoke some weed, drink some beers

[frilliam2]

Silent bob just spoke. WTF.

[madtiger111]

C'mon, limp dick!

[ripper6]

...no wait I fucked up

[johnnychaos91185]

Profound words.

[douggyfrreshh]

...and shit herself

[777jackpot1]

What's a cock smoker?

[NoPainNoGain2393]

someone who smokes cock?

[flea288]

A dick sucker, you fucking useless cunt.

[dillondoty]

cunt is the stupidest fucking insult ive ever heard fuck off

[RaidenGaid]

you cunt

[mcnabj]

your mouth

[777jackpot1]

FAGGET.

[mcnabj]

its good your have acknowledged your species.

[41184140]

A dude that smokes cock

[flea288]

I shat on my girl friend once when I was ramming her home, I couldn't hold it in and just crapped all over her.

[chrisdude2000]

smokin weed smokin weed drinkin beer doin coke!!!

[Conchobhar]

I like how Mewes can't remember a single line.

[xSUPERFUZZx]

acting is 25% memory, 75% improvisation

[Conchobhar]

Acting? What does that have to do with Jason Mewes?

[yankeezrul08]

@Conchobhar ya ur a faggot. u'd prolly like one up ur ass faggot

[Destoryer86]

@Conchobhar what do you mean he can remeber a line? when did he not say his line? he never paused.

[Conchobhar]

@Destoryer86 His eyes are on the counter during most of the scene where I presume his copy of the script was lying.

[Destoryer86]

@Conchobhar ya i guess he could be. it is kinda strange that hes constantly looking down

[metalmessiahmetal]

@Conchobhar those r the lines

[BrianMagnumFilms]

@Conchobhar if ur referring to "no wait i fucked up" it was scripted

[onehitta1]

I like this Jay, out of all the ones we have seen. I dunno wtf was up with him in Clerks 2. I mean, in the jail, "you guys gotta blow each other, and we get to watch."

What did that rehab DO to him?!?!?!

[Gomorrah0]

ya he was legitimately fucked up during the making of Clerks. he just looks so authentic at playing a druggie. Clerks II you can tell he's just making an ass out of himself for hollywood cash.

[guitar19904]

i cant believe jays actually 16 in this movie the guy looks like hes in his 20s

[Araelyn]

He WAS 20 in this movie :P

[assphincter]

I just saw this movie again recently. Last time I had seen it was about 2 years prior. This movie gets better every time you watch it. A true work of genius yet so simple.

[gatorboy1518]

who cares if its bad acting :]

best movie ever

[Retardoproductions1]

jason mewes is the only bad actor beacuse he always wanted to get off set

[chrischrist2u]

yea but in this scene him and silent bob were on the same track, jay was pointing out all the things that veronica did for dante, like bringing him lunch, rubbing his back, and even changing his tire, and bob just finished it with his insightful words, i thought jason was pretty good :)

[BojanglesUdon]

didn't they get Jason Mewes drunk for this scene so he'd be more "in character?"

[ElDoucho]

lol, fail

[yourbaldassmom2099]

BOB KEEPS IT REAL SON!!!!!!!!

[butchvign1991]

the acting is realistic

[ptcruzr]

its not realistic acting its bad acting but thats why this movies so awesome .. bunch of amatures... back then anyway

[CyborgNinja442]

Taking into account the style that Clerks really created, the acting is perfectly attuned to what they wanted it to be

[ElDoucho]

Great acting. :]

[Grothbar]

my favourite scene

[muchoboy11]

lol i love this movie but the acting is so damn bad

[XiaoPow]

it really isn't.

[thejoamiq]

it is at times, but that's part of its charm. somehow the acting can be bad but still genuine regardless.

[XiaoPow]

True, but I don't see it as bad, I see it as different.

[ycshow]

yeah the acting is pretty good because they werent main stream. they got worse in later movies.

[onehitta1]

Come on limp dicklmao

[Legopancake]

me and a friend wer leanin against a wall in the street , and another friends showed me a picture of j and sb, we looked exactly the same lol i gotta watch this film !

[anitadebauch]

So true what Bob says...

[glennjridge]

he's rude but he's got a point

[TrandomnesstwO]

That was the randomest shit I saw on youtube today.

[Retardoproductions1]

Jay is my homeboy

[LatinPunk4eva]

"This fucking fagot Dante you cock smoker"-Jay

[RonOdee]

Jay Stealing the candy while keeping Dante distracted; then the transition from a regular discussion into an altercation. It kills me every time. fucking hysterical.

[DmisterFTW]

If silent Bob speaks its a fucking important lesson.

[Revrin743]

then you didnt pay attention,jay wasnt paying attention either,thats why bob blew up.

lesson:dont be stupid,PAY ATTENTION :)

[mfgdrummer]

Jesus, why does my comment have -3? Didn't anyone see Jay And Silent Bob Strike Back?

[Eavesy3]

This is a Clerks clip you faggot, down vote this cocksmokers comment even more.

[mfgdrummer]

Jesus, my comment was a joke.

[000BatFuck000]

why was this thumbs downed? he's right.

[grmking]

ok wtf y did people rate my comment down :p,these are my fav movies

[eleme88]

no wait i fucked up... hahaha

[pharesite]

A line that makes someone have an epiphany per say. In clerks 2...not so much, but it was still pretty funny lol

[awesomebob56]

what are you? a vampire?

[airconditionedgypsy2]

lol best scene in the movie

[jdorsal]

C'mon limp dick.

[grmking]

SILENT?bob?i havent watched the first one yet but i know clerks 2 and jay and silent bob strike back silent bob talked at least once

[zufgh]

yeah, but he's normally silent so best just to go with it

[grmking]

yeah i know but still XD

[slipknot2593]

yeah but when he talked in jay and silent bob it was hillarius "THE SIGN ON THE BACK OF THE CAR SAID CRITTERS OF HOLLYHOOD!! YOU DUMB FUCK!!! XD lmfao

[EdGaR9558]

c'mon silent bob lets get out the fuk out of this fukin jib joint with this fukin faget dante u cocksmoker lol i love dat part

[RonOdee]

Sean..... great call, this particular scene has made me piss my pants so hard so many times..... Jay's stealing fucking gum while he gives this guy a beating... the funniest clip in clerks outside of "I don't appreciate your ruse mam."

[MisterPow13]

SILENT BOB FOR PRESIDENT!

[SeanOBriain]

"Come on limp dick.."

LOL - I love how Jay totally ruins the moment. Hilarious. I've watched Clerks over the years about 500 times, and everytime I laugh at every skit. That's what a good movie is!

[jasonfan92]

I love this part!

[Thesamofsam]

noinch, noinch, noinch, schmokin weed, schmokin weed, doin coke, drinkin beers

[ComicBookOverkill]

Its most of them cheat on ya.

[Rachman1337]

can someone tell me what silent bob says at the end? i can't understand him.

[Marzack]

"Y'know theys a million fine women in the world but they dont all bring you lasanga at work."

[Rachman1337]

Thanks, but he says a little after that's still a little fuzzy.  Maybe I'll google it.

[oneinfinity]

I's something like "They only just cheat on you."

[Markray8675309]

"they mostly just cheat on you" is what i think he said.

[notyoursavior78]

"Ya know there's a million fine looking woman in the world dude, but they don't all bring you lasganga at work, most of them just cheat on you."

Jay was supposed to say the line, but he kept forgetting it because he was drunk or high during this scene. Jay put in a A+ perfomance though for the end of the movie and Silent Bob spoke his first lines :) It's all good!

[eleme88]

MOST OF EM JUST CHEAT ON YOU thats what he says

[Yero2815]

Time to kick back, drink shome beersh, and shmoke some weed.

[RETURNSVD]

his talking the five cents candy

[11juan11]

The wise words of Silent Bob works everytime(except in clerks II).

[mfgdrummer]

"...i got nothing."

[YourBCbuddy420420]

he says more than that

[jefersonvilaede]

notices that jay comes in the store singin his song..

[Andyakaherman]

I love this movie, and I agree this is the funniest part! I love the part where the customer calls Randal a dickhead!

[jefersonvilaede]

fuckin faggot dante, cock smoker

[crowofwraith]

fucking fagot dante, you cock smoker.

[frollun2]

i love how he just flips out for no reason. this fucking faggot dante, you cock smoker.

[jeffgordon98]

another funny part: ''Come on limp dick!'' lmao

[ryansaif]

NO WAY BY FAAAR THE BEST PART IS :55

[jeffgordon98]

''you know theres fine million women in the world dude, but they all dont bring in (cant spell it) at work.. most of them just cheat on you.'' Silent Bob rules!

[twistedroots666]

I love this scene, one of my favs. I felt so sorry for Jay when he talks about his girlfriends...bitches dont know a good thing

[MrCarlosUSA]

What Silent Bob said to Dante, was probably why Dante slept with Becky leading to the events of Clerks 2.

[44435444]

How do you figure?